On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 4:49:14 AM UTC-5, Cindy Hamilton wrote:
> > I inherited most of my inheritance in stocks, bonds, mutual funds, etc. Upon On Friday, July 21, 2017 at 1:26:38 PM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
....
> > Let's get this straight, you are evidently very confused.
> >getting possession OF my inherited stocks, etc. I immediately off $150,000 worth of the most heinous stocks my father owned. Stuff like OIL stocks, BofA, Phizer,etc. EVIL corporate stocks like that that I will NEVER support now that they are MY dollars!
>
> Not to worry, John. Those shares didn't vanish. Someone else bought them,
> and the corporations are ticking along just fine without you.
>
> Cindy Hamilton

I know, but at least MY (new inherited) dollars are NOT SUPPORTING THOSE EVIL CORPORATIONS ANYMORE!! Just like I NEVER spend ANY of MY DOLLARS at MalWart, McCraps, etc!!

What are YOU supporting with YOUR DOLLARS?!

John Kuthe...

John Kuthe...

jmcquown wrote:
>
> On 7/23/2017 8:55 AM, Janet wrote:
> > In article >, says...
> >>
> >> jmcquown wrote:
> >>> I was already living here when I inherited the house. Taking care of
> >>> my mother. Cooking, cleaning, shopping for groceries. Making sure
> >>> she got medical care.
> >>
> >> Am I hearing a violin playing in the background? ;-D
> >
> > No, you bloody well are not. Those of us who posted here during those
> > very tough years for Jill, know what a physical and emotional struggle
> > it was.
> >
> > Raising a child YOU CHOSE to have, who is not mentally or physically
> > impaired, who spends hours every day at school, who has her own friends
> > and social life and is steadily approaching physical and emotional
> > independence, is pretty much the exact opposite of last-years care for
> > old people whose physical, mental and emotional needs become steadily
> > MORE demanding and exhausting for the carer.
> >
> > As you'd know, if you'd gone home to care for your old parents.
> >
> > Janet UK
> >
> Thank you, Janet.
>
> Jill

LOL (Janet UK is such a nifty reference to have here.)

Janet wrote:
>
> In article >, says...
> >
> > jmcquown wrote:
> > > I was already living here when I inherited the house. Taking care of
> > > my mother. Cooking, cleaning, shopping for groceries. Making sure
> > > she got medical care.
> >
> > Am I hearing a violin playing in the background? ;-D
>
> No, you bloody well are not. Those of us who posted here during those
> very tough years for Jill, know what a physical and emotional struggle
> it was.
>
> Raising a child YOU CHOSE to have, who is not mentally or physically
> impaired, who spends hours every day at school, who has her own friends
> and social life and is steadily approaching physical and emotional
> independence, is pretty much the exact opposite of last-years care for
> old people whose physical, mental and emotional needs become steadily
> MORE demanding and exhausting for the carer.
>
> As you'd know, if you'd gone home to care for your old parents.

The offer to care for my Mom is on the table now and available if
she chooses that. Your rant about raising kids tells me that you
never had any...or at least you never had any to raise by
yourself. You obviously have no clue as to what it's like. Do you
even ever cook food? I don't remember any of that either.

On 2017-07-23 10:31 AM, jmcquown wrote:

> 2008 was pretty much a bust for everyone in terms of the real estate
> market.
>
> My neighbor's house has been on the market for a long time. She's
> pretty much stuck until someone buys it. Meanwhile, she's paid to have
> it repainted (inside and out) and still has to pay the taxes, etc.
>
> The house on the other side of mine was on the market for about 7 years.
> It's a gorgeous house, all the bells and whistles including a fancy
> kitchen with all the things people seem to want: granite counter tops,
> stainless appliances. It even had built-in wine racks. I watched as
> the asking price went down, down, down.

Real estate is a funny business. There were houses around here that
were on the market for ages. The market was stagnant and houses simply
were not selling. Recently they have been selling like hotcakes. My
neighbour's house was on the market for more than three years. The one
on the other side of it had been owned by an old lady who moved into an
old folks home. It was snapped up by someone who wanted to rip it down
and put up a huge places that required by law variance. When that was
rejected the put it back on the market and it sold within a few days.


>

On 2017-07-23, jmcquown > wrote:

> I would suggest all of the above speak to some licensed financial
> advisors.

It's about 23 mins long. Watch it or not. Get a free financial advisor
license (much later than the elf spotting certification!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gvZSpET11ZY

nb

On 2017-07-23 11:14 AM, Gary wrote:
> Janet wrote:

>> As you'd know, if you'd gone home to care for your old parents.
>
> The offer to care for my Mom is on the table now and available if
> she chooses that. Your rant about raising kids tells me that you
> never had any...or at least you never had any to raise by
> yourself. You obviously have no clue as to what it's like. Do you
> even ever cook food? I don't remember any of that either.
>


Parents tend to end up in the care of the one decent enough to do the
right thing. My neighbour ended up caring for her mother when her 13
brothers and sisters wanted to stick her in a home. She got no help
from any of them. Even the relatives who used to spend every weekend
sitting around her pool,eating her food and drinking her booze suddenly
had no time to come by to visit... and maybe watch granny while she went
for groceries.

On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 11:40:05 -0400, Dave Smith
> wrote:

>On 2017-07-23 11:14 AM, Gary wrote:
>> Janet wrote:
>
>>> As you'd know, if you'd gone home to care for your old parents.
>>
>> The offer to care for my Mom is on the table now and available if
>> she chooses that. Your rant about raising kids tells me that you
>> never had any...or at least you never had any to raise by
>> yourself. You obviously have no clue as to what it's like. Do you
>> even ever cook food? I don't remember any of that either.
>>
>
>
>Parents tend to end up in the care of the one decent enough to do the
>right thing. My neighbour ended up caring for her mother when her 13
>brothers and sisters wanted to stick her in a home. She got no help
>from any of them. Even the relatives who used to spend every weekend
>sitting around her pool,eating her food and drinking her booze suddenly
>had no time to come by to visit... and maybe watch granny while she went
>for groceries.

I have seen just that so many times, it would almost be safe to say,
it's the rule. My maternal eldest aunt was cared for by the youngest
when the time came, you watch 13 other siblings find reasons they
couldn't help. They were round pdq though when death occurred.

On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 10:51:12 AM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
> On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 4:49:14 AM UTC-5, Cindy Hamilton wrote:
> > > I inherited most of my inheritance in stocks, bonds, mutual funds, etc. Upon On Friday, July 21, 2017 at 1:26:38 PM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
> ...
> > > Let's get this straight, you are evidently very confused.
> > >getting possession OF my inherited stocks, etc. I immediately off $150,000 worth of the most heinous stocks my father owned. Stuff like OIL stocks, BofA, Phizer,etc. EVIL corporate stocks like that that I will NEVER support now that they are MY dollars!
> >
> > Not to worry, John. Those shares didn't vanish. Someone else bought them,
> > and the corporations are ticking along just fine without you.
> >
> > Cindy Hamilton
>
> I know, but at least MY (new inherited) dollars are NOT SUPPORTING THOSE EVIL CORPORATIONS ANYMORE!! Just like I NEVER spend ANY of MY DOLLARS at MalWart, McCraps, etc!!
>
> What are YOU supporting with YOUR DOLLARS?!

Quite a lot of things. For simplicity, let's say it's everything in
the S&P 500. I also bank at BofA, buy pharmaceuticals from Pfizer,
and put quite a bit of oil through my mid-size SUV.

Oh, and the military-industrial complex pays my salary and that of
my husband.

Cindy Hamilton

On 2017-07-23 11:54 AM, wrote:
> On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 11:40:05 -0400, Dave Smith
> > wrote:

>> Parents tend to end up in the care of the one decent enough to do the
>> right thing. My neighbour ended up caring for her mother when her 13
>> brothers and sisters wanted to stick her in a home. She got no help
>>from any of them. Even the relatives who used to spend every weekend
>> sitting around her pool,eating her food and drinking her booze suddenly
>> had no time to come by to visit... and maybe watch granny while she went
>> for groceries.
>
> I have seen just that so many times, it would almost be safe to say,
> it's the rule. My maternal eldest aunt was cared for by the youngest
> when the time came, you watch 13 other siblings find reasons they
> couldn't help. They were round pdq though when death occurred.
>

Then there are cases where one manages to alienate the rest. My mother's
sister and her moved in with her parents after a divorce. She never
moved out, and paid almost nothing for room and board.... and day care.
My grandfather died without a will so the house went to the three
daughters. My mother and other aunt acted in good faith, signing it back
over to their mother with the understanding that it would go back to the
three daughters.

Nana should have gone into a home but the bitch aunt was vehemently
opposed. That would have meant selling the house and she would have had
to find a place to live. She would have had to pay her own way for a
change. We suspected elder abuse and coercion and that was pretty well
confirmed when my other aunt discovered that Nana's will left everything
to the mooching daughter. I guess Nana had a change of heart when she
realized her days were numbered. By that time the good aunt had died.
Bitch aunt was furious to discover that Nana had changed her will and
that she would only get one third of the house. One third went to my
mother and the other to my cousin. Then the bitch pulled a tricky deal
with a low ball offer on the house sale and it sold for about 1/3 what
I expected it would. My mother signed to avoid problems. Then it turned
out that the bitch aunt was the buyer.

I can't say that my aunt was the care giver. She would go out and leave
her mother alone. She went on lots of vacations. She could afford to.
She had a sugar daddy and free room and board.

> wrote in message
...

> I have seen just that so many times, it would almost be safe to say,
> it's the rule. My maternal eldest aunt was cared for by the youngest
> when the time came, you watch 13 other siblings find reasons they
> couldn't help. They were round pdq though when death occurred.

I'm reminded of when I worked at the satellite school, I was talking to a
man from Mexico and he said the one thing that he's seen a lot of in the USA
is the number of rest homes where people place their parents, where in
Mexico it is an honor to have the old people living with you and people do
it willingly. Granted, I don't know if that's true, but it's certainly true
here. As a comedian once said, "watch out for the kids, they want the
house." LOL

Cheri

In article >, says...
>
> Janet wrote:
> >
> > In article >, says...
> > >
> > > jmcquown wrote:
> > > > I was already living here when I inherited the house. Taking care of
> > > > my mother. Cooking, cleaning, shopping for groceries. Making sure
> > > > she got medical care.
> > >
> > > Am I hearing a violin playing in the background? ;-D
> >
> > No, you bloody well are not. Those of us who posted here during those
> > very tough years for Jill, know what a physical and emotional struggle
> > it was.
> >
> > Raising a child YOU CHOSE to have, who is not mentally or physically
> > impaired, who spends hours every day at school, who has her own friends
> > and social life and is steadily approaching physical and emotional
> > independence, is pretty much the exact opposite of last-years care for
> > old people whose physical, mental and emotional needs become steadily
> > MORE demanding and exhausting for the carer.
> >
> > As you'd know, if you'd gone home to care for your old parents.
>
> The offer to care for my Mom is on the table now and available if
> she chooses that. Your rant about raising kids tells me that you
> never had any...or at least you never had any to raise by
> yourself. You obviously have no clue as to what it's like. Do you
> even ever cook food? I don't remember any of that either.

I warned you about inhaling ferret. Now you've got amnesia on top of
all your other problems.

Janet UK

On 2017-07-23 3:00 PM, Wayne Boatwright wrote:
> On Sun 23 Jul 2017 09:40:04a, Dave Smith told us...
>
>> By that time the good aunt had died. Bitch
>> aunt was furious to discover that Nana had changed her will and
>> that she would only get one third of the house. One third went to
>> my mother and the other to my cousin. Then the bitch pulled a
>> tricky deal with a low ball offer on the house sale and it sold
>> for about 1/3 what I expected it would. My mother signed to avoid
>> problems. Then it turned out that the bitch aunt was the buyer.
>
> She should have been burned at the stake!
>
>> I can't say that my aunt was the care giver. She would go out and
>> leave her mother alone. She went on lots of vacations. She could
>> afford to. She had a sugar daddy and free room and board.


I have to admit that I subscribe to the newspaper most likely to have
her obituary.... if the old bag ever does die.


I came home one afternoon and my wife told me that my grandmother had
called. A minute or two after my wife told me about the call my aunt
called. She wanted to know why I had called Nana. I told her I didn't
call her, that she had called me. " Ha.... I knew it" ?????? I got
the impression that I had just got my mother into trouble.

On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 09:53:50 -0700, "Cheri" >
wrote:

> wrote in message
.. .
>
>> I have seen just that so many times, it would almost be safe to say,
>> it's the rule. My maternal eldest aunt was cared for by the youngest
>> when the time came, you watch 13 other siblings find reasons they
>> couldn't help. They were round pdq though when death occurred.
>
>I'm reminded of when I worked at the satellite school, I was talking to a
>man from Mexico and he said the one thing that he's seen a lot of in the USA
>is the number of rest homes where people place their parents, where in
>Mexico it is an honor to have the old people living with you and people do
>it willingly. Granted, I don't know if that's true, but it's certainly true
>here. As a comedian once said, "watch out for the kids, they want the
>house." LOL
>
>Cheri
>
To me, it was only natural my mother would come to me, she couldn't
continue living in Spain without my father. In my book, elder people
die at home and I intend to do so myself, one way or another. I didn't
regard it as a burden or duty, just doing what comes naturally.

On 7/23/2017 4:29 PM, wrote:

>>
> To me, it was only natural my mother would come to me, she couldn't
> continue living in Spain without my father. In my book, elder people
> die at home and I intend to do so myself, one way or another. I didn't
> regard it as a burden or duty, just doing what comes naturally.
>

When my mother had a severe stroke we were putting her in a nursing
home. My SIL thought it was horrible and said she would take her (by
plane) to her house. She would take care of her if neither my sister or
I would. She came to the hospital and in five minutes realized we made
the right decision. She needed professional care.

On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 17:08:45 -0400, Ed Pawlowski > wrote:

>On 7/23/2017 4:29 PM, wrote:
>
>>>
>> To me, it was only natural my mother would come to me, she couldn't
>> continue living in Spain without my father. In my book, elder people
>> die at home and I intend to do so myself, one way or another. I didn't
>> regard it as a burden or duty, just doing what comes naturally.
>>
>
>When my mother had a severe stroke we were putting her in a nursing
>home. My SIL thought it was horrible and said she would take her (by
>plane) to her house. She would take care of her if neither my sister or
>I would. She came to the hospital and in five minutes realized we made
>the right decision. She needed professional care.

That's a little different but against the stroke possibility my
daughters have my medical power of attorney and they know better than
to allow any resuscitation. We have gone over it in detail.

On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 09:28:32 -0700 (PDT), Cindy Hamilton
> wrote:

>On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 10:51:12 AM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
>> On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 4:49:14 AM UTC-5, Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>> > > I inherited most of my inheritance in stocks, bonds, mutual funds, etc. Upon On Friday, July 21, 2017 at 1:26:38 PM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
>> ...
>> > > Let's get this straight, you are evidently very confused.
>> > >getting possession OF my inherited stocks, etc. I immediately off $150,000 worth of the most heinous stocks my father owned. Stuff like OIL stocks, BofA, Phizer,etc. EVIL corporate stocks like that that I will NEVER support now that they are MY dollars!
>> >
>> > Not to worry, John. Those shares didn't vanish. Someone else bought them,
>> > and the corporations are ticking along just fine without you.
>> >
>> > Cindy Hamilton
>>
>> I know, but at least MY (new inherited) dollars are NOT SUPPORTING THOSE EVIL CORPORATIONS ANYMORE!! Just like I NEVER spend ANY of MY DOLLARS at MalWart, McCraps, etc!!
>>
>> What are YOU supporting with YOUR DOLLARS?!
>
>Quite a lot of things. For simplicity, let's say it's everything in
>the S&P 500. I also bank at BofA, buy pharmaceuticals from Pfizer,
>and put quite a bit of oil through my mid-size SUV.
>
>Oh, and the military-industrial complex pays my salary and that of
>my husband.

You once said you're a sociopath, so it makes sense that you don't
care about the consequences of your actions.

On Tue, 18 Jul 2017 08:23:19 -0700 (PDT), John Kuthe
> wrote:

>On Tuesday, July 18, 2017 at 10:13:26 AM UTC-5, Dave Smith wrote:
>...
>> I imagine her bad choices would include running up so much credit card
>> debt that she had to get a consolidation loan. 31% interest on the
>> consolidation loan????? Holy crap.... another bad choice. If she has
>> that much debt it will likely take more than 3 years to pay it off so it
>> is going to be more than double the principle.
>
>Yep, debt can easily become an EVIL MONSTER!! That's why I try to eschew it at every opportunity!! Cash on the barrelhead is best!

We get the picture, John. You may sit down.

On Tue, 18 Jul 2017 12:38:28 -0300, wrote:

>On Tue, 18 Jul 2017 09:43:58 -0400, Ed Pawlowski > wrote:
>
>>On 7/18/2017 9:12 AM, wrote:
>>
>>>> Again.....money in the bank is security. You don't have to lose sleep at
>>>> night worrying about paying bills on time.
>>>>
>>>> Seems like many here have never had that problem. Good for you.
>>>
>>> I've had poor times too but I was also strictly brought up that you
>>> didn't spend what you haven't got lol Stupid use of credit cards
>>> seems to get most people in trouble. I've got a top credit rating
>>> but I don't go out and spend on that account.
>>>
>>
>>A woman at work mad some bad choices with a divorce, getting rid of a
>>dondo, etc. She now has a consolidation loan to get rid of her credit
>>card and other debts. I'm not sure of the amount, but I; guessing in
>>the range of 20k. Interest rate is 31%. No, that is not a typo. She
>>will end up paying at least double what she owes.
>
>I know some people who do not have credit cards simply because they
>can't control themselves

Apparently, they CAN control themselves.

On 2017-07-23 4:29 PM, wrote:
> On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 09:53:50 -0700, "Cheri" >
> wrote:

> To me, it was only natural my mother would come to me, she couldn't
> continue living in Spain without my father. In my book, elder people
> die at home and I intend to do so myself, one way or another. I didn't
> regard it as a burden or duty, just doing what comes naturally.

Unfortunately, it only comes naturally to some people. I was
disappointed in the contribution my brothers made when my mother needed
someone to stay with her 24/7 for four weeks. One SiL (later to become
known as the bitch in law) offered to set up a schedule. One bother
lived a little more than two hours a day, so she did not include him in
the schedule. When I suggested that it was unfair that he make no
contribution she tried to same me with "Oh David. This is your mother we
are talking about". She and her husband (my brother) were prepared to
excuse him from his share but were not willing to fill in for him. On
the country, that brother was responsible for only one day per week.
That left it to my oldest brother and me, and I was working 10 hour
shifts. Luckily, the oldest brother's wife and mine helped out a lot.
Two brothers and I had 6 days per week to cover, one did nothing and the
other only one. It's hard to believe we had the same parents.

When it came to staying with Mom on her last hours, those two couples
came by in the late afternoon for a short visit and went out for supper.
Bitch in law tried to schedule a watch. She said since she was already
there it was time for her to leave, and they and out of town brother
went out for supper. That left the oldest and I to cover the night. it
seemed that it was too much of an inconvenience for the others.

Janet wrote in rec.food.cooking:

> In article >, cshenk1
> @cox.net says...
> >
> > dsi1 wrote in rec.food.cooking:
>
> > > Have fun sheriffing your little fiefdom. My guess is that it'll be
> > > hell for the tenants.
> >
> > ds1, he's basically got a house and has roomates. Its not a new
> > situaton.
>
> It's a completely new situation. Before, they were all in the same
> boat; slated the landlord for all the problems in the property.
>
> When John becomes the owner/landlord
>
> a) he becomes the target for every tiny criticism by tenants
> b) he's likely to criticise tenants for every little damage or
> breakage they inflict on his newly renovated property
>
> c) The nature of John's illness can make dealing with personal
> disagreements very difficult for both parties.
>
> Janet UK

So, you've never been the primary who took in roommates?


--

Sqwertz wrote in rec.food.cooking:

> On Sat, 22 Jul 2017 19:05:52 -0400, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
>
> > On 7/22/2017 5:48 PM, Sqwertz wrote:
> >
> >> When you rent rooms to college students, you are not trying to keep
> >> long term tenants who will care too much about the condition of the
> >> house. They typically spend little time at house. John is
> probably >> the only one who actually uses much of the common areas,
> and I get the >> impression he's there most of the day. Which is not
> the ideal >> landlord situation.
> >
> > I don't think this is the typical landlord situation. John is more
> > than landlord, he is surrogate parent. That can be good or bad but
> > most collage kids will look up to an adult that is not their
> > parent. He may be just what the kids need.
>
> OTOH, John openly considers them "Cheap Chinese Crap". So I kinda
> doubt he emits that respectable, fatherly aura. Rather, they are
> representations of his childhood teddy bear - to cuddle with when he's
> high, and to ignore and abuse when he's low.


You missed a beat. It's the land owners he calls that, not the fellow
tennants

--

Dave Smith wrote:
>Gary wrote:
>> Janet wrote:
>
>>> As you'd know, if you'd gone home to care for your old parents.
>>
>> The offer to care for my Mom is on the table now and available if
>> she chooses that. Your rant about raising kids tells me that you
>> never had any...or at least you never had any to raise by
>> yourself. You obviously have no clue as to what it's like. Do you
>> even ever cook food? I don't remember any of that either.
>
>Parents tend to end up in the care of the one decent enough to do the
>right thing.

That's not necessarily true... everyone's situation is different...
very often people have a family of their own and can't just leave all
their responsibilities to care for ailing parents. When my mom got
ill my father was in good health so he saw to her needs, and I and
my sister would pitch in whenever we could to give him a break. Then
one day when he went to the kitchen to bring her a bowl of Jello she
just passed away. That's when my father began dating every woman at
at the senior center, even dated their daughters. But he pushed his
luck, one day as he was pulling his car from the curb to go on a date,
a massive coronary took him, doctor said he never knew.

In Jill's case she was single with no kids, living in an apt with her
cat and was unemployed (never did figure how she managed and she never
explained), by moving to care for her parents she capitalized by
saving her rent money and other living expenses. She eventually
complained about my phone calls but they were only generated by her
constantly emailing me long missives like six times a day wanting my
advice about her finding employment. I can't type nearly as fast as
she did and couldn't keep up with her emails other than to phone...
and those were the phone calls she complained about, all generated by
her constant emails. She really should not have made those phone
calls public because if not for her constant emails I'd never have
phoned her. I'm really not angry at her, I understood that she was in
over her head and I tried to offer advice but in the end it wasn't
appreciated. Other than pertaining to cooking I will never again
offer aid to anyone here.

"Cheri" > wrote in message
news
> > wrote in message
> ...
>
>> I have seen just that so many times, it would almost be safe to say,
>> it's the rule. My maternal eldest aunt was cared for by the youngest
>> when the time came, you watch 13 other siblings find reasons they
>> couldn't help. They were round pdq though when death occurred.
>
> I'm reminded of when I worked at the satellite school, I was talking to a
> man from Mexico and he said the one thing that he's seen a lot of in the
> USA is the number of rest homes where people place their parents, where in
> Mexico it is an honor to have the old people living with you and people do
> it willingly. Granted, I don't know if that's true, but it's certainly
> true here. As a comedian once said, "watch out for the kids, they want the
> house." LOL
>
> Cheri

One problem I have seen is when the older person reaches the point of
needing continual care. Can't even make a trip to the grocery store for
yourself because something could happen to them when you leave. Another
problem is that the older person can because combative to family members.
One I am thinking of professed to be able to do nothing for herself but if
she didn't get her own way, she could do some damage to the other person
with her fists. Or the house itself just won't work. For instance, a bathtub
that you can't get the person in and out of or stairs. And in some cases
there isn't the means or the space to modify the place so it will work.
Sometimes the nursing home is the only choice.

"Ed Pawlowski" > wrote in message
...
> On 7/23/2017 4:29 PM, wrote:
>
>>>
>> To me, it was only natural my mother would come to me, she couldn't
>> continue living in Spain without my father. In my book, elder people
>> die at home and I intend to do so myself, one way or another. I didn't
>> regard it as a burden or duty, just doing what comes naturally.
>>
>
> When my mother had a severe stroke we were putting her in a nursing home.
> My SIL thought it was horrible and said she would take her (by plane) to
> her house. She would take care of her if neither my sister or I would.
> She came to the hospital and in five minutes realized we made the right
> decision. She needed professional care.

Same with my MIL. We had to drive to another state every third weekend to
care for her. And despite trying to arrange care 24/7, it wasn't always
possible. She was left alone briefly, had an accident and nearly burned down
her house.

That was some years ago. She's still in the nursing home and faring much
better. She's now in the city where she grew up and has plenty of friends in
there. When she was at home, her only visitors were family, a nun and an
occasional friend. It was also very hard to get her to and from medical
appointments and because she has many medical problems, she had to go
frequently. Now she only has to go if she needs some sort of specific
testing that she can't get where she's at.

On 2017-07-23 5:31 PM, Bruce wrote:
> On Tue, 18 Jul 2017 08:23:19 -0700 (PDT), John Kuthe

>>> I imagine her bad choices would include running up so much credit card
>>> debt that she had to get a consolidation loan. 31% interest on the
>>> consolidation loan????? Holy crap.... another bad choice. If she has
>>> that much debt it will likely take more than 3 years to pay it off so it
>>> is going to be more than double the principle.
>>
>> Yep, debt can easily become an EVIL MONSTER!! That's why I try to eschew it at every opportunity!! Cash on the barrelhead is best!
>
> We get the picture, John. You may sit down.

He eschews debt by having his loan applications rejected.

On 7/23/2017 11:40 AM, Dave Smith wrote:
> On 2017-07-23 11:14 AM, Gary wrote:
>> Janet wrote:
>
>>> As you'd know, if you'd gone home to care for your old parents.
>>
>> The offer to care for my Mom is on the table now and available if
>> she chooses that. Your rant about raising kids tells me that you
>> never had any...

It wasn't a rant, Gary. You have kids, they're your responsibility.

> or at least you never had any to raise by
>> yourself. You obviously have no clue as to what it's like. Do you
>> even ever cook food? I don't remember any of that either.
>>
> Parents tend to end up in the care of the one decent enough to do the
> right thing. My neighbour ended up caring for her mother when her 13
> brothers and sisters wanted to stick her in a home. She got no help
> from any of them. Even the relatives who used to spend every weekend
> sitting around her pool,eating her food and drinking her booze suddenly
> had no time to come by to visit... and maybe watch granny while she went
> for groceries.
>
When our father died and I called my middle brother about the funeral he
said, "You'll have to reschedule, I have meetings that day." Excuse me?!
Sorry it's not convenient.

I should have told him to kiss my ass. Unfortunately, our mother wanted
him to be there. So we rescheduled his funeral.

Jill

On 7/23/2017 6:06 PM, wrote:
> Dave Smith wrote:
>> Gary wrote:
>>> Janet wrote:
>>
>>>> As you'd know, if you'd gone home to care for your old parents.
>>>
>>> The offer to care for my Mom is on the table now and available if
>>> she chooses that. Your rant about raising kids tells me that you
>>> never had any...or at least you never had any to raise by
>>> yourself. You obviously have no clue as to what it's like. Do you
>>> even ever cook food? I don't remember any of that either.
>>
>> Parents tend to end up in the care of the one decent enough to do the
>> right thing.
>
> That's not necessarily true... everyone's situation is different...
> very often people have a family of their own and can't just leave all
> their responsibilities to care for ailing parents. When my mom got
> ill my father was in good health so he saw to her needs, and I and
> my sister would pitch in whenever we could to give him a break. Then
> one day when he went to the kitchen to bring her a bowl of Jello she
> just passed away. That's when my father began dating every woman at
> at the senior center, even dated their daughters. But he pushed his
> luck, one day as he was pulling his car from the curb to go on a date,
> a massive coronary took him, doctor said he never knew.
>
> In Jill's case she was single with no kids, living in an apt with her
> cat and was unemployed (never did figure how she managed and she never
> explained), by moving to care for her parents she capitalized by
> saving her rent money and other living expenses.

Single, no kids is true. How I managed is I had savings and invested
wisely, not that it's any of your business. I didn't save any rent
money when I moved here. I paid off the remaining year's lease to move
here. I wasn't one of those low rent tenants you had who left the place
trashed.

> She eventually
> complained about my phone calls but they were only generated by her
> constantly emailing me long missives like six times a day wanting my
> advice about her finding employment.

WHAT?! Why on earth would I ask for your suggestions about finding a
job? You don't know anything about this area or the businesses.

> I can't type nearly as fast as
> she did and couldn't keep up with her emails other than to phone...

Oh, right. I emailed you six times a day. Sorry, but you're delusional.

> and those were the phone calls she complained about, all generated by
> her constant emails. She really should not have made those phone
> calls public because if not for her constant emails I'd never have
> phoned her. I'm really not angry at her, I understood that she was in
> over her head and I tried to offer advice but in the end it wasn't
> appreciated. Other than pertaining to cooking I will never again
> offer aid to anyone here.
>
>
Wow. Can't wait to ask you for "aid". Not that I ever did.

Jill

On 7/23/2017 7:58 PM, jmcquown wrote:

>>
> When our father died and I called my middle brother about the funeral he
> said, "You'll have to reschedule, I have meetings that day." Excuse me?!
> Sorry it's not convenient.
>
> I should have told him to kiss my ass. Unfortunately, our mother wanted
> him to be there. So we rescheduled his funeral.
>
> Jill

Wow, sorry your father could not hang on to die at a more convenient
time. But thanks for the tip. I'll check with my kids before I die to
be sure it fits their schedule.

On 7/23/2017 8:47 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
> On 7/23/2017 7:58 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>
>>>
>> When our father died and I called my middle brother about the funeral
>> he said, "You'll have to reschedule, I have meetings that day." Excuse
>> me?! Sorry it's not convenient.
>>
>> I should have told him to kiss my ass. Unfortunately, our mother
>> wanted him to be there. So we rescheduled his funeral.
>>
>> Jill
>
> Wow, sorry your father could not hang on to die at a more convenient
> time. But thanks for the tip. I'll check with my kids before I die to
> be sure it fits their schedule.

I'm still irritated about this. What son asks his mother to reschedule
a funeral because he has meetings? How insensitive.

Jill

On 7/23/2017 10:20 PM, jmcquown wrote:
> On 7/23/2017 8:47 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
>> On 7/23/2017 7:58 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>>
>>>>
>>> When our father died and I called my middle brother about the funeral
>>> he said, "You'll have to reschedule, I have meetings that day." Excuse
>>> me?! Sorry it's not convenient.
>>>
>>> I should have told him to kiss my ass. Unfortunately, our mother
>>> wanted him to be there. So we rescheduled his funeral.
>>>
>>> Jill
>>
>> Wow, sorry your father could not hang on to die at a more convenient
>> time. But thanks for the tip. I'll check with my kids before I die to
>> be sure it fits their schedule.
>
> I'm still irritated about this. What son asks his mother to reschedule
> a funeral because he has meetings? How insensitive.
>
> Jill

And what employer or business associate would not reschedule for your
absence. Wait, I do know one. He wanted to know if his supervisor
would be in for part of the day.

> wrote in message
...
> On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 09:53:50 -0700, "Cheri" >
> wrote:
>
> wrote in message
. ..
>>
>>> I have seen just that so many times, it would almost be safe to say,
>>> it's the rule. My maternal eldest aunt was cared for by the youngest
>>> when the time came, you watch 13 other siblings find reasons they
>>> couldn't help. They were round pdq though when death occurred.
>>
>>I'm reminded of when I worked at the satellite school, I was talking to a
>>man from Mexico and he said the one thing that he's seen a lot of in the
>>USA
>>is the number of rest homes where people place their parents, where in
>>Mexico it is an honor to have the old people living with you and people do
>>it willingly. Granted, I don't know if that's true, but it's certainly
>>true
>>here. As a comedian once said, "watch out for the kids, they want the
>>house." LOL
>>
>>Cheri
>>
> To me, it was only natural my mother would come to me, she couldn't
> continue living in Spain without my father. In my book, elder people
> die at home and I intend to do so myself, one way or another. I didn't
> regard it as a burden or duty, just doing what comes naturally.


Yes, people used to do that a lot more than they do now. My grandmother and
my uncle lived with us most of our lives, up until the time they died. I
have wonderful memories of both of them.

Cheri

On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 5:19:59 PM UTC-4, Bruce wrote:
> On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 09:28:32 -0700 (PDT), Cindy Hamilton
> > wrote:
>
> >On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 10:51:12 AM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
> >> On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 4:49:14 AM UTC-5, Cindy Hamilton wrote:
> >> > > I inherited most of my inheritance in stocks, bonds, mutual funds, etc. Upon On Friday, July 21, 2017 at 1:26:38 PM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
> >> ...
> >> > > Let's get this straight, you are evidently very confused.
> >> > >getting possession OF my inherited stocks, etc. I immediately off $150,000 worth of the most heinous stocks my father owned. Stuff like OIL stocks, BofA, Phizer,etc. EVIL corporate stocks like that that I will NEVER support now that they are MY dollars!
> >> >
> >> > Not to worry, John. Those shares didn't vanish. Someone else bought them,
> >> > and the corporations are ticking along just fine without you.
> >> >
> >> > Cindy Hamilton
> >>
> >> I know, but at least MY (new inherited) dollars are NOT SUPPORTING THOSE EVIL CORPORATIONS ANYMORE!! Just like I NEVER spend ANY of MY DOLLARS at MalWart, McCraps, etc!!
> >>
> >> What are YOU supporting with YOUR DOLLARS?!
> >
> >Quite a lot of things. For simplicity, let's say it's everything in
> >the S&P 500. I also bank at BofA, buy pharmaceuticals from Pfizer,
> >and put quite a bit of oil through my mid-size SUV.
> >
> >Oh, and the military-industrial complex pays my salary and that of
> >my husband.
>
> You once said you're a sociopath, so it makes sense that you don't
> care about the consequences of your actions.

In practical terms what difference would it make? Someone else would
have my job. I have to bank somewhere. BofA isn't going to suffer
if I close my account. My husband needs those prescriptions. And
the SUV? I suppose I could get a smaller one, but I need that AWD
to get out of my driveway in the winter to go to my job.

I did refrain from putting any more people on this planet, so I'm
way ahead there. I probably could idle my SUV in the driveway
all day long and still come out ahead on my planetary impact.

Cindy Hamilton

On 7/24/2017 12:23 AM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
> On 7/23/2017 10:20 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>> On 7/23/2017 8:47 PM, Ed Pawlowski wrote:
>>> On 7/23/2017 7:58 PM, jmcquown wrote:
>>>
>>>>>
>>>> When our father died and I called my middle brother about the funeral
>>>> he said, "You'll have to reschedule, I have meetings that day." Excuse
>>>> me?! Sorry it's not convenient.
>>>>
>>>> I should have told him to kiss my ass. Unfortunately, our mother
>>>> wanted him to be there. So we rescheduled his funeral.
>>>>
>>>> Jill
>>>
>>> Wow, sorry your father could not hang on to die at a more convenient
>>> time. But thanks for the tip. I'll check with my kids before I die to
>>> be sure it fits their schedule.
>>
>> I'm still irritated about this. What son asks his mother to
>> reschedule a funeral because he has meetings? How insensitive.
>>
>> Jill
>
> And what employer or business associate would not reschedule for your
> absence.

Really and truly. What employer wouldn't say, "Your father died? Go!"
As if the marketing meeting couldn't continue without him. (laugh)

This is the same brother who had half a lung removed due to cancer. I
was there for him. At the hospital, at his house. Let us not forget
when he had all his teeth pulled so he could get dental implants. I
drove him to/from all those appointments, too. Took off work early so I
could drive him to/from.

After the cancer surgery he expected me to stay in his home and take
care of him. And I did... up to a point. Then he tried to keep me from
going home to feed my cat (Persia) and clean her litter box. He
cavalierly said, "She'll be fine." Excuse me? No. I don't think she
knows how to get the food out of the pantry or open a can. Idiot.

I wasn't gone for a day before he called and said he needed help
changing the bandage on his back. When I got there he was hanging out
with his best friend. They were having drinks in the kitchen. Why
couldn't you ask him to change the bandage? No reason. He just wanted
me to come running.

There are many reasons I do not speak to this selfish brother.

Jill

On Mon, 24 Jul 2017 03:41:38 -0700 (PDT), Cindy Hamilton
> wrote:

>On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 5:19:59 PM UTC-4, Bruce wrote:
>> On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 09:28:32 -0700 (PDT), Cindy Hamilton
>> > wrote:
>>
>> >On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 10:51:12 AM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
>> >> On Sunday, July 23, 2017 at 4:49:14 AM UTC-5, Cindy Hamilton wrote:
>> >> > > I inherited most of my inheritance in stocks, bonds, mutual funds, etc. Upon On Friday, July 21, 2017 at 1:26:38 PM UTC-4, John Kuthe wrote:
>> >> ...
>> >> > > Let's get this straight, you are evidently very confused.
>> >> > >getting possession OF my inherited stocks, etc. I immediately off $150,000 worth of the most heinous stocks my father owned. Stuff like OIL stocks, BofA, Phizer,etc. EVIL corporate stocks like that that I will NEVER support now that they are MY dollars!
>> >> >
>> >> > Not to worry, John. Those shares didn't vanish. Someone else bought them,
>> >> > and the corporations are ticking along just fine without you.
>> >> >
>> >> > Cindy Hamilton
>> >>
>> >> I know, but at least MY (new inherited) dollars are NOT SUPPORTING THOSE EVIL CORPORATIONS ANYMORE!! Just like I NEVER spend ANY of MY DOLLARS at MalWart, McCraps, etc!!
>> >>
>> >> What are YOU supporting with YOUR DOLLARS?!
>> >
>> >Quite a lot of things. For simplicity, let's say it's everything in
>> >the S&P 500. I also bank at BofA, buy pharmaceuticals from Pfizer,
>> >and put quite a bit of oil through my mid-size SUV.
>> >
>> >Oh, and the military-industrial complex pays my salary and that of
>> >my husband.
>>
>> You once said you're a sociopath, so it makes sense that you don't
>> care about the consequences of your actions.
>
>In practical terms what difference would it make? Someone else would
>have my job. I have to bank somewhere. BofA isn't going to suffer
>if I close my account. My husband needs those prescriptions. And
>the SUV? I suppose I could get a smaller one, but I need that AWD
>to get out of my driveway in the winter to go to my job.
>
>I did refrain from putting any more people on this planet, so I'm
>way ahead there. I probably could idle my SUV in the driveway
>all day long and still come out ahead on my planetary impact.

You have a point, but just because you do one thing right, does that
mean you can do everything else wrong?

By the way, what would happen to the world if all civilised countries
stopped procreating and all barbaric countries continued to breed like
rabbits?

jmcquown wrote:
>
> There are many reasons I do not speak to this selfish brother.

Just reading what I snipped, I don't blame you. Just because he's
your brother/blood doesn't mean he's worth dealing with. As
Sheldon once said, "hell with humans, animals are the ones worth
caring for. They love you unconditionally and don't try to screw
you." Not an exact quote but the idea is there. I agree with him.

Bruce wrote: (to cindy h.)
>
> You have a point, but just because you do one thing right, does that
> mean you can do everything else wrong?

Who does everything right, Bruce? You do what you can. Every
little bit helps.

>
> By the way, what would happen to the world if all civilised countries
> stopped procreating and all barbaric countries continued to breed like
> rabbits?

D.Trump: We nuke the evil *******s.

On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 22:53:07 -0700, "Cheri" >
wrote:

> wrote in message
.. .
>> On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 09:53:50 -0700, "Cheri" >
>> wrote:
>>
> wrote in message
...
>>>
>>>> I have seen just that so many times, it would almost be safe to say,
>>>> it's the rule. My maternal eldest aunt was cared for by the youngest
>>>> when the time came, you watch 13 other siblings find reasons they
>>>> couldn't help. They were round pdq though when death occurred.
>>>
>>>I'm reminded of when I worked at the satellite school, I was talking to a
>>>man from Mexico and he said the one thing that he's seen a lot of in the
>>>USA
>>>is the number of rest homes where people place their parents, where in
>>>Mexico it is an honor to have the old people living with you and people do
>>>it willingly. Granted, I don't know if that's true, but it's certainly
>>>true
>>>here. As a comedian once said, "watch out for the kids, they want the
>>>house." LOL
>>>
>>>Cheri
>>>
>> To me, it was only natural my mother would come to me, she couldn't
>> continue living in Spain without my father. In my book, elder people
>> die at home and I intend to do so myself, one way or another. I didn't
>> regard it as a burden or duty, just doing what comes naturally.
>
>
>Yes, people used to do that a lot more than they do now. My grandmother and
>my uncle lived with us most of our lives, up until the time they died. I
>have wonderful memories of both of them.
>
>Cheri

I felt it was good for our kids, not only did they get to really know
each other but it bred some tolerance into my kids for older people.
Some things had to be sacrificed but it didn't harm any of us.

On Mon, 24 Jul 2017 07:13:59 -0400, Gary > wrote:

>Bruce wrote: (to cindy h.)
>>
>> You have a point, but just because you do one thing right, does that
>> mean you can do everything else wrong?
>
>Who does everything right, Bruce? You do what you can. Every
>little bit helps.

Yes, but Cindy sounded like she's proud of supporting nasty
corporations.

>> By the way, what would happen to the world if all civilised countries
>> stopped procreating and all barbaric countries continued to breed like
>> rabbits?
>
>D.Trump: We nuke the evil *******s.

I count the US as a civilised country, but Trump should be the
President of a country like Yemen or Saudi-Arabia.

On Mon, 24 Jul 2017 09:54:32 GMT, Wayne Boatwright
> wrote:

>
>My mother and I scheduled my dad's funeral according to my mother's
>wishes. It was delayed for four days because my mother wanted her
>simblings from out of state to be there. Whatever she wanted was
>certainly fine with me.
>
>When my mother passed I called several relatives who I knew would
>probably want to be there. We delayed for several days so that those
>who came from CA and Alabama could be there. I had a lot of local
>friends who came, but had no family who lived in town.

When my mother died here there was really no reason for a funeral, she
was cremated and in due course I took her ashes back to the UK and
there was a service many of her friends and siblings could attend,
then the urn was interred with my brother which is where she really
wanted to be.

On Mon, 24 Jul 2017 08:21:19 -0300, wrote:

>On Sun, 23 Jul 2017 22:53:07 -0700, "Cheri" >
>wrote:
>
> wrote in message
. ..

>>> To me, it was only natural my mother would come to me, she couldn't
>>> continue living in Spain without my father. In my book, elder people
>>> die at home and I intend to do so myself, one way or another. I didn't
>>> regard it as a burden or duty, just doing what comes naturally.
>>
>>
>>Yes, people used to do that a lot more than they do now. My grandmother and
>>my uncle lived with us most of our lives, up until the time they died. I
>>have wonderful memories of both of them.
>>
>>Cheri
>
>I felt it was good for our kids, not only did they get to really know
>each other but it bred some tolerance into my kids for older people.
>Some things had to be sacrificed but it didn't harm any of us.

I thought for a long time that old people were a special kind of
people that were born old. Only now that I'm starting to get older
myself do I realise that old people were once young. I now have more
sympathy for them.