NitroFishBlue wrote:
> "lea" <> wrote ...
>> Lucian Wischik wrote:
>>> Miss Jean wrote:
>>
>>>> Then leave the table and stay gone long enough for the customer to
>>>> cut his steak and take a couple of bites. Then go back and BE
>>>> SPECIFIC: How is your steak, sir? Or Would you care for more
>>>> butter for your lobster?
>
>>> Does anyone else dislike this as much as me?
>
>> yes, me.
>
> I personally hate it when the server comes back to the table after I
> have started eating and asks me how everything is. I usually have a
> mouthful of food or am engaged in fun conversation with my husband.
> The server's interruption sidetracks everything.
>
> Once I start to eat I DON"T WANT TO BE BOTHERED.
>
> I have been thinking about making a small card that I can hand to the
> serving staff. The card would say "Thank you for taking my order. I
> would appreciate it when my order has been served that you do not
> came back to the table to ask me how things are. If I want something
> I will signal for you. No signal means things are fine. I want to
> enjoy my dinner and conversation with my husband without being
> interrupted. Again thank you for your service."

heh


--
Gold ODDY Winner, 2002

Lucian Wischik wrote:

< snip >

> I also get the impression that american consumers are more keen to
> have things how they want, while italian and english consumers are
> more willing to accept what's given. So it's not a surprise to me to
> get more "Is everything ok?"s in america than in europe.

I just find the American "Is everything ok?" perfunctory, like "have a nice
day". 1 person in 20 really hopes you *do* have a nice day, the others do
it to avoid getting the sack.

--
Gold ODDY Winner, 2002

Rick & Cyndi wrote:
> "lea" <> wrote ...
>> Miss Jean wrote:
>>
>>> At The Club (where I used to work as the only waitperson in a room
>>> with 36 seats), we called it "The Two Bite Rule". It went like this:

<snip >

>>> Then leave the table and stay gone
>>> long enough for the customer to cut his steak and take a couple of
>>> bites. Then go back and BE SPECIFIC: How is your steak, sir? Or
>>> Would you care for more butter for your lobster? NOT "Is everything
>>> ok?"
>>
>>
>> That would shit me to tears, quite frankly.
>>
>> I like my waiters to be intuititive, not checking off questions by
>> rote the moment I bite down.
>>
>
> Yes and no... While I may not be able to judge the entire meal
> within 2 bites - at least I won't be sitting there for the next
> 20 minutes with a steak that is overcooked that I won't eat
> (which I would have determined the first time I cut into).

I wouldn't allow 20min to pass by. If my meal is not to my asking ( ie: as
with steak ), I expect to be able to turn around in the direction in which
my waiter departed, to catch his eye with a simple raised finger/hand ( not
the "bird" motion , and to have him/her by my side in record time.

A good waiter can perform Miss Jean's "2-bite-rule" without having to
intrude on the table, but to keep a watchful eye from a distance post
serving.


--
Gold ODDY Winner, 2002

Dan Abel wrote:
> Lucian Wischik <> wrote:
>
>
>> Yeah, maybe I could get you to take the steak back and cook me
>> another one, in the process screwing up the eating experience with
>> the other people at the table. But two bites isn't anywhere near
>> enough time for me to judge the rest of the dish, and just about all
>> comments about the food won't be resolvable anyway. ("I'd have liked
>> a touch less thyme."
>
>
> Obviously, they aren't going to change the amount of thyme in your
> food. However, if they get enough complaints, they may decrease the
> amount of thyme used in that dish.

This is something I would make comment on post-meal.
When the waiter collects my plate, I would let them know my meal was
delicious ( if it was ), but perhaps a bit heavy on the thyme. It didn't
ruin my meal, but i'd let them know if I felt it excessive etc.


--
Gold ODDY Winner, 2002

We would all like Jeeves (or Bunter) to be serving us, quietly,
unobtrusively, and with psychic powers. I wonder what Jeeves' wages
were? Outside of *very* upscale restaurants, waitstaff is essentially
untrained outside something like the 'two bite rule' required by a
chain restaurant. For most servers, these are fill-in non-professional
jobs paying less than minimum wage. The quick adapters will realize
that they can make more money by being attentive. And the thoughtful
ones will devise some method (can't say what it might be) to judge
whether "is everything OK?" is attentive or obtrusive.

Having been on both sides of the table, I'm surprised there aren't
more incidents of "going restaurant" than "going postal." *We* are all
reasonable and polite and undemanding, and appreciative of good
service, but many aren't. And we don't complain when our mechanics or
plumbers are socially inept. Nor demand they observe some strict
protocol when attending to our needs. We're bloody grateful to *find*
a plumber or mechanic that will attend sometime sooner than a week
from next Tuesday. And we pay them enough to support a winter home in
the Bahamas.

Lighten up. :-)

lea wrote:

> I just find the American "Is everything ok?" perfunctory, like "have a nice
> day". 1 person in 20 really hopes you *do* have a nice day, the others do
> it to avoid getting the sack.
>

Better to be told "have a nice day" by 20 people who don't really mean it than
to be told to **** off by one who does.

On Sat, 18 Oct 2003 12:42:38 GMT, Frogleg > wrote:

>We would all like Jeeves (or Bunter) to be serving us, quietly,
>unobtrusively, and with psychic powers. I wonder what Jeeves' wages
>were?

It varies, of course; but in the US, a good butler can expect to bring
in $60k to $90k per year on average, which I'm sure beats the hell out
of waiting tables.

Regards,
Tracy R.

Dave Smith wrote:
> lea wrote:
>
>> I just find the American "Is everything ok?" perfunctory, like "have
>> a nice day". 1 person in 20 really hopes you *do* have a nice day,
>> the others do it to avoid getting the sack.
>>
>
> Better to be told "have a nice day" by 20 people who don't really
> mean it than to be told to **** off by one who does.

heh.
I see your point

--
Gold ODDY Winner, 2002

RESPONDING TO:
restaurants could develop a
signal mechanism -- "if you need anything, put up this flag or secure
a napkin to the edge of the table." :-)

That is truly rediculous! Actually all of this post was. Servers are
trained to "anticipate" the needs of their guests'. If the server came
to the table I am sure he/she sensed that there was something possibly
needed at the table at the time (since the pace at the table started
to "slow down"). Wondering if the previous poster that was
"interrupted" considered that there may have been one of their dining
companions that did need something and just wasn't in the habit of
interrupting the person that was speaking to say he/she needed the
server.
I can guarantee that if the poster had needed something and the server
was not there at that exact moment she would still be complaining! If
you do not want a server to interrupt your conversations at the
table... dine at home! They are just doing their job... trying to
Serve You.

~A Manager that TRAINS her waitstaff!



Frogleg > wrote in message >. ..
> On Sun, 05 Oct 2003 06:31:27 GMT, Wayne Boatwright
> > wrote:
>
> >Julia Altshuler > wrote in
> >news:KvOfb.688791$uu5.112026@sccrnsc04:
> >
> >> It happened again tonight. We ate the first part of our meal in
> >> relative silence since we don't like to talk much as we eat. As we
> >> were slowing down, we started talking more. Only when we're in the
> >> middle of spirited conversation does the waiter or waitress come over
> >> to interupt to ask if everything is alright. I have to take my
> >> attention away from my dining companions to pay attention to her to
> >> reassure her that everything is fine. (Or it was fine until I was
> >> interrupted.)
>
> >You won't change their habits, but you might change their immediate
> >behavior by telling the waitperson (as you are being served) that you'd
> >rather not be disturbed while eating, and that you'll let them know if
> >you need anything during the meal.
>
> Waay too reasonable for rfc. :-) I don't remember any waitress
> "training" when I served, but I'm sure some establishments
> suggest/require that waiters regularly visit tables with those chirpy
> inquiries. There's also the difficulty of judging which patrons prefer
> upscale service (no queries; no "my name is Pat and I'll be..."; just
> noticing when something is required and supplying it, and which are
> used to the chirpy, chain-restaurant "friendly" style which makes some
> feel they're being neglected if no one stops by to inquire.
>
> Maybe, in the absence of well-trained waitstaff alert for the
> slightest glance in their direction, restaurants could develop a
> signal mechanism -- "if you need anything, put up this flag or secure
> a napkin to the edge of the table." :-)

>Servers are
>trained to "anticipate" the needs of their guests'. If the server came
>to the table I am sure he/she sensed that there was something possibly
>needed at the table at the time (since the pace at the table started
>to "slow down").

You missed the point of the thread. And you seem pretty confident of things
that you had no way of observing. It is the experience of many that waiters
(can we eject "servers"?) insensitively intrude on intimate situations, and
that this tendency seems to be increasing.

>I can guarantee that if the poster had needed something and the server
>was not there at that exact moment she would still be complaining!

Again, by what warrant do you issue such guarantees? For most of us, the
intruding waiter is MUCH more obnoxious than the neglectful one. And we know,
if a waiter is neglectful, we have the option of rising and seeking him out--as
I have done, for instance, if I need the bill because I'm in a hurry to leave.

Neil