Pretty amusing.

Lenona.

http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...icle325123.ece

A proper postponement?

Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.

At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
party until the following night. I replied no and I mentioned that I
had already prepared the food.

The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
make it. I was stunned then, and I’m still stunned today. When I
looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m. I don’t
know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
have joined us later.

I spoke to her later and she appears like nothing happened and does
not care that we lost hundreds of dollars worth of food and the time
it took us to prepare the party. This has never happened to me in 50
years. I had people cancel the day before, the morning of but never
one hour before. How would Miss Manners react?

Gentle Reader: With amazement that cocktail food for four people could
cost hundreds of dollars. What were you serving—buckets of caviar?

The answer is that while your neighbors were wrong to treat the
occasion so lightly, you are treating it rather heavily. Stopping by
for drinks with the neighbors does sound like a casual event that
could easily be postponed, in contrast to an elaborate cocktail party,
which is presumed to involve major preparation and a goodly number of
guests. Had you invited them for dinner perhaps they might have taken
the invitation more seriously.

But it is open to you to make your point by inquiring sympathetically
about the emergency—is he all right? Is there anything you can do to
help?

Just please do not admit to spying on his car. This proves nothing, as
he could have been taken away in an ambulance, but is the sign of a
creepy neighbor.

On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 14:38:56 -0800 (PST), Lenona >
wrote:

>Pretty amusing.
>
>Lenona.
>
>http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...icle325123.ece
>
>A proper postponement?
>
>Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
>were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>
>At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
>party until the following night. I replied no and I mentioned that I
>had already prepared the food.
>
>The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
>make it. I was stunned then, and I’m still stunned today. When I
>looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m. I don’t
>know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
>a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
>have joined us later.
>
>I spoke to her later and she appears like nothing happened and does
>not care that we lost hundreds of dollars worth of food and the time
>it took us to prepare the party. This has never happened to me in 50
>years. I had people cancel the day before, the morning of but never
>one hour before. How would Miss Manners react?
>
>Gentle Reader: With amazement that cocktail food for four people could
>cost hundreds of dollars. What were you serving—buckets of caviar?
>
>The answer is that while your neighbors were wrong to treat the
>occasion so lightly, you are treating it rather heavily. Stopping by
>for drinks with the neighbors does sound like a casual event that
>could easily be postponed, in contrast to an elaborate cocktail party,
>which is presumed to involve major preparation and a goodly number of
>guests. Had you invited them for dinner perhaps they might have taken
>the invitation more seriously.
>
>But it is open to you to make your point by inquiring sympathetically
>about the emergency—is he all right? Is there anything you can do to
>help?
>
>Just please do not admit to spying on his car. This proves nothing, as
>he could have been taken away in an ambulance, but is the sign of a
>creepy neighbor.

What kind of imbecile prepares HUNDREDS of $$$$$ in food for cocktails
with two neighbors... were it me all I'd have to do is put the bottles
and glasses back in the bar hutch, rewrap a couple three cheeses, and
close up two boxes of crackers... I'd have lost a little extra ice but
I'd have learned that those neighbors belong on my Do Not Invite
Douchebags list.

Brooklyn1 wrote:
> On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 14:38:56 -0800 (PST), Lenona >
> wrote:
>
>> Pretty amusing.
>>
>> Lenona.
>>
>> http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...icle325123.ece
>>
>> A proper postponement?
>>
>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
>> were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>>
>> At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
>> party until the following night. I replied no and I mentioned that I
>> had already prepared the food.
>>
>> The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
>> make it. I was stunned then, and I’m still stunned today. When I
>> looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m. I don’t
>> know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
>> a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
>> have joined us later.
>>
>> I spoke to her later and she appears like nothing happened and does
>> not care that we lost hundreds of dollars worth of food and the time
>> it took us to prepare the party. This has never happened to me in 50
>> years. I had people cancel the day before, the morning of but never
>> one hour before. How would Miss Manners react?
>>
>> Gentle Reader: With amazement that cocktail food for four people could
>> cost hundreds of dollars. What were you serving—buckets of caviar?
>>
>> The answer is that while your neighbors were wrong to treat the
>> occasion so lightly, you are treating it rather heavily. Stopping by
>> for drinks with the neighbors does sound like a casual event that
>> could easily be postponed, in contrast to an elaborate cocktail party,
>> which is presumed to involve major preparation and a goodly number of
>> guests. Had you invited them for dinner perhaps they might have taken
>> the invitation more seriously.
>>
>> But it is open to you to make your point by inquiring sympathetically
>> about the emergency—is he all right? Is there anything you can do to
>> help?
>>
>> Just please do not admit to spying on his car. This proves nothing, as
>> he could have been taken away in an ambulance, but is the sign of a
>> creepy neighbor.
>
> What kind of imbecile prepares HUNDREDS of $$$$$ in food for cocktails
> with two neighbors... were it me all I'd have to do is put the bottles
> and glasses back in the bar hutch, rewrap a couple three cheeses, and
> close up two boxes of crackers... I'd have lost a little extra ice but
> I'd have learned that those neighbors belong on my Do Not Invite
> Douchebags list.

I, too, was wondering about that "hundreds of dollars". What
planet does this person live on?

--
Jean B.

Lenona wrote:
> Pretty amusing.

People are funny.

> http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...icle325123.ece
>
> A proper postponement?
>
> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
> were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>
> At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
> party until the following night. I replied no

Excuse me, no?? What are you going to do, force them to come
over? Okay, then, you can't postpone, how does cancel fit into your
plans?

> and I mentioned that I had already prepared the food.

> The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
> make it. I was stunned then, and I’m still stunned today. When I
> looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m.

Maybe the guy can work from home through the computer. If
something bad goes wrong at work, sometimes it must be fixed
or at least worked on right away.

> I don’t
> know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
> a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
> have joined us later.

I guess she wasn't all that keen to come over and entertain you
by herself. And he's probably not going to be ready for a party
any time soon or they would have said they'd be late.

> I spoke to her later and she appears like nothing happened and does
> not care that we lost hundreds of dollars worth of food and the time
> it took us to prepare the party. This has never happened to me in 50
> years. I had people cancel the day before, the morning of but never
> one hour before.

If she hadn't bothered to let you know something unavoidable had
come up, you might have an argument. They can't make it over
for cocktails, stuff happens. And when you say you lost hundreds
of dollars of food for a 4 person cocktail party, you're not believable.
Stretches credibility even if it was a dinner party.

nancy

On 1/27/2011 6:10 PM, Jean B. wrote:
> Brooklyn1 wrote:
>> On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 14:38:56 -0800 (PST), Lenona >
>> wrote:
>>
>>> Pretty amusing.
>>>
>>> Lenona.
>>>
>>> http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...icle325123.ece
>>>
>>>
>>> A proper postponement?
>>>
>>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
>>> were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>>>
>>> At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
>>> party until the following night. I replied no and I mentioned that I
>>> had already prepared the food.
>>>
>>> The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
>>> make it. I was stunned then, and I’m still stunned today. When I
>>> looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m. I don’t
>>> know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
>>> a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
>>> have joined us later.
>>>
>>> I spoke to her later and she appears like nothing happened and does
>>> not care that we lost hundreds of dollars worth of food and the time
>>> it took us to prepare the party. This has never happened to me in 50
>>> years. I had people cancel the day before, the morning of but never
>>> one hour before. How would Miss Manners react?
>>>
>>> Gentle Reader: With amazement that cocktail food for four people could
>>> cost hundreds of dollars. What were you serving—buckets of caviar?
>>>
>>> The answer is that while your neighbors were wrong to treat the
>>> occasion so lightly, you are treating it rather heavily. Stopping by
>>> for drinks with the neighbors does sound like a casual event that
>>> could easily be postponed, in contrast to an elaborate cocktail party,
>>> which is presumed to involve major preparation and a goodly number of
>>> guests. Had you invited them for dinner perhaps they might have taken
>>> the invitation more seriously.
>>>
>>> But it is open to you to make your point by inquiring sympathetically
>>> about the emergency—is he all right? Is there anything you can do to
>>> help?
>>>
>>> Just please do not admit to spying on his car. This proves nothing, as
>>> he could have been taken away in an ambulance, but is the sign of a
>>> creepy neighbor.
>>
>> What kind of imbecile prepares HUNDREDS of $$$$$ in food for cocktails
>> with two neighbors... were it me all I'd have to do is put the bottles
>> and glasses back in the bar hutch, rewrap a couple three cheeses, and
>> close up two boxes of crackers... I'd have lost a little extra ice but
>> I'd have learned that those neighbors belong on my Do Not Invite
>> Douchebags list.
>
> I, too, was wondering about that "hundreds of dollars". What planet does
> this person live on?
>

Me three. And also, the neighbor gentleman could have been inflicted
with the sort of emergency that requires one to sit on the toilet for a
few hours, but she may have wanted to be delicate about it.

--
Currently Reading: Falling Free by Lois McMaster Bujold

On 27/01/2011 6:36 PM, ravenlynne wrote:

>> I, too, was wondering about that "hundreds of dollars". What planet does
>> this person live on?
>>
>
> Me three. And also, the neighbor gentleman could have been inflicted
> with the sort of emergency that requires one to sit on the toilet for a
> few hours, but she may have wanted to be delicate about it.

I will join the club and cast doubt on the claim of hundreds of dollars.
It leads me to the conclusion that the host is a lying asshole, which
provides the explanation for the cancellation.

On 1/27/2011 6:41 PM, Dave Smith wrote:
> On 27/01/2011 6:36 PM, ravenlynne wrote:
>
>>> I, too, was wondering about that "hundreds of dollars". What planet does
>>> this person live on?
>>>
>>
>> Me three. And also, the neighbor gentleman could have been inflicted
>> with the sort of emergency that requires one to sit on the toilet for a
>> few hours, but she may have wanted to be delicate about it.
>
> I will join the club and cast doubt on the claim of hundreds of dollars.
> It leads me to the conclusion that the host is a lying asshole, which
> provides the explanation for the cancellation.
>
>

Or a gross exaggerator. I spent slightly over 100 for new years eve.
That was steaks, seafood, apps, drinks and it fed 5 adult eaters. I
over planned and it also fed us for a week. (I wish I still had some of
that smoked salmon spread.)

--
Currently Reading: Falling Free by Lois McMaster Bujold

"Janet" > wrote in message
...
> In article >, ost
> says...
>>
>> On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 18:16:01 -0500, Nancy Young wrote:
>>
>> > Lenona wrote:
>> >
>> >> The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
>> >> make it. I was stunned then, and I?m still stunned today. When I
>> >> looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m.
>> >
>> > Maybe the guy can work from home through the computer. If
>> > something bad goes wrong at work, sometimes it must be fixed
>> > or at least worked on right away.
>>
>> My guess is that he called and said he was leaving work, she reminded
>> him they were having drinks at the neighbors, at which point he cursed
>> loudy. He told his wife to call it off because he just had a shitty
>> day at work and didn't want to go visit the fuddy duddy neighbors and
>> make it even worse.
>
> For a wide range of work reasons, a fair number of our friends and
> family may get an emergency call at any time, interrupting any social
> occasion, and have to cancel/ excuse themselves and leave immediately.
> Pretty often they don't know the details or sometimes, for professional
> reasons can't discuss them; mostly they just plain don't have time to
> chat about it or (if they are phoning me) need to keep their line clear.
> They just say " sorry, it's an emergency" and go.

As for the car being parked outside.... My husband can work just as
easily from home as in the office. During an emergency he will be in his
study with his laptop and Blackberry and can be working with users all over
the world!! It is a shame when plans are spoiled, but one shouldn't look
for the worst possible explantion. It seems to me that if the reason was
that he didn't want to attend, he wouldn't make the plans to do so in the
first place.

--
--
https://www.shop.helpforheroes.org.uk/

On Fri, 28 Jan 2011 10:48:31 -0000, Janet > wrote:

>In article >, ost
>says...
>>
>> On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 18:16:01 -0500, Nancy Young wrote:
>>
>> > Lenona wrote:
>> >
>> >> The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
>> >> make it. I was stunned then, and I?m still stunned today. When I
>> >> looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m.
>> >
>> > Maybe the guy can work from home through the computer. If
>> > something bad goes wrong at work, sometimes it must be fixed
>> > or at least worked on right away.
>>
>> My guess is that he called and said he was leaving work, she reminded
>> him they were having drinks at the neighbors, at which point he cursed
>> loudy. He told his wife to call it off because he just had a shitty
>> day at work and didn't want to go visit the fuddy duddy neighbors and
>> make it even worse.
>
> For a wide range of work reasons, a fair number of our friends and
>family may get an emergency call at any time, interrupting any social
>occasion, and have to cancel/ excuse themselves and leave immediately.
>Pretty often they don't know the details or sometimes, for professional
>reasons can't discuss them; mostly they just plain don't have time to
>chat about it or (if they are phoning me) need to keep their line clear.
>They just say " sorry, it's an emergency" and go.

You obviously wouldn't prepare hundreds of $$$$s worth of foods for an
informal get together with those people.

I have folks wanting to drop in all the time. They may decide last
minute that they'll be in the area. I don't prepare anything for
informal get togethers; I always have coffee, tea,
booze/beer/wine/pop, cheese & crackers. And I don't do anything until
they actually arrive... and my house is always tidy. Many of my
guests are from the NYC area, some who will be on their way to
somewhere (during winter usually skiing in Canada), they almost always
bring foods that I can't get here in hillybilly boondocks. In fact
I'm expecting three people to stop by on Sunday, on there way to ski:
http://www.skimontblanc.com/english/index.php
They'll visit a few hours before heading off on their journey, I know
they will be bringing all sorts of delicious goodies that are abundant
in Brooklyn but don't exist anywhere else.

My point is that no way did I believe that fairy tale about preparing
hundreds of $$$$$s in food for cocktails with two neighbors. My next
door neighbor stops by often, unannounced... all I need do is hand him
a glass of ice and put a bottle of JW black label on the table.

On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 18:10:51 -0500, Jean B. wrote:

> Brooklyn1 wrote:
>> On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 14:38:56 -0800 (PST), Lenona >
>> wrote:
>>
>>> Pretty amusing.
>>>
>>> Lenona.
>>>
>>> http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...icle325123.ece
>>>
>>> A proper postponement?
>>>
>>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
>>> were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>>>
>>> At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
>>> party until the following night. I replied no and I mentioned that I
>>> had already prepared the food.
>>>
>>> The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
>>> make it. I was stunned then, and I¡¦m still stunned today. When I
>>> looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m. I don¡¦t
>>> know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
>>> a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
>>> have joined us later.
>>>
>>> I spoke to her later and she appears like nothing happened and does
>>> not care that we lost hundreds of dollars worth of food and the time
>>> it took us to prepare the party. This has never happened to me in 50
>>> years. I had people cancel the day before, the morning of but never
>>> one hour before. How would Miss Manners react?
>>>
>>> Gentle Reader: With amazement that cocktail food for four people could
>>> cost hundreds of dollars. What were you serving¡Xbuckets of caviar?
>
> I, too, was wondering about that "hundreds of dollars". What
> planet does this person live on?

maybe she enters cocaine expenses as a food item.

your pal,
blake

In article >,
"Nancy Young" > wrote:

> Lenona wrote:
> > Pretty amusing.
>
> People are funny.
>
> > http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...ticle325123.ec
> > e
> >
> > A proper postponement?
> >
> > Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
> > who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
> > were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
> >
> > At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
> > party until the following night. I replied no
>
> Excuse me, no?? What are you going to do, force them to come
> over? Okay, then, you can't postpone, how does cancel fit into your
> plans?

I agree. The reality in life is that shit happens. Maybe the who had an
emergency husband got a ride to work or perhaps he was working from home
and telecommuting. I work in IT and I am always on call. At any given
moment in time, I could be called into work for an emergency. Unless I
have an unavoidable personal situation that conflicts with the request,
I am expected to be there. In fact, just yesterday, I had an issue occur
at work, but I also had to make an emergency visit to the dentist at the
same time, so the work matter had to wait while I got a root canal.

One day last summer, I was out with friends celebrating a birthday. We
were dining at a nice steak house. Just as we finished our meal, I
received a call from work. I stepped out into the lobby to take the call
and it was a panicked co-worker who desperately needed my help
recovering a server with a failed hard drive. Never mind that I was the
guest of honor who's birthday was being celebrated. I had to go to work
immediately because that server fed payroll jobs that had to be
processed. That was around 7:00pm. I did not finish with the emergency
until around 5:30 the next morning. I was up all night. Believe me, the
last thing I wanted to do was interrupt my own birthday celebration to
sit with a co-worker in my office all night restoring data to his failed
disk, but that's what I had to do. Fortunately, I succeeded and all the
batch jobs that had to run that morning, ran. I would have much rather
lingered over dinner longer and went out shopping with my friends.

Fortunately, my friends know that when I make plans, its always
tentative and most of my friends work in IT, so they know the drill. As
it happens, I rarely have to cancel my plans due to work, but it does
happen maybe two or three times a year.

Stan Horwitz wrote:

> "Nancy Young" > wrote:
>
>> Lenona wrote:

>>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a
>>> couple who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four
>>> of us. They were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>>>
>>> At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
>>> party until the following night. I replied no
>>
>> Excuse me, no?? What are you going to do, force them to come
>> over? Okay, then, you can't postpone, how does cancel fit into your
>> plans?
>
> I agree. The reality in life is that shit happens. Maybe the who had
> an emergency husband got a ride to work or perhaps he was working
> from home and telecommuting. I work in IT and I am always on call. At
> any given moment in time, I could be called into work for an
> emergency.

Exactly.

> Unless I have an unavoidable personal situation that
> conflicts with the request, I am expected to be there. In fact, just
> yesterday, I had an issue occur at work, but I also had to make an
> emergency visit to the dentist at the same time, so the work matter
> had to wait while I got a root canal.

Hope that went well.

> One day last summer, I was out with friends celebrating a birthday. We
> were dining at a nice steak house. Just as we finished our meal, I
> received a call from work. I stepped out into the lobby to take the
> call and it was a panicked co-worker who desperately needed my help
> recovering a server with a failed hard drive. Never mind that I was
> the guest of honor who's birthday was being celebrated. I had to go
> to work immediately because that server fed payroll jobs that had to
> be processed.

You're singing my song, Stan. Heh. Payroll has to run tonight!
So it's your birthday!

> That was around 7:00pm. I did not finish with the
> emergency until around 5:30 the next morning. I was up all night.

You're giving me flashbacks.

> Believe me, the last thing I wanted to do was interrupt my own
> birthday celebration to sit with a co-worker in my office all night
> restoring data to his failed disk, but that's what I had to do.
> Fortunately, I succeeded and all the batch jobs that had to run that
> morning, ran. I would have much rather lingered over dinner longer
> and went out shopping with my friends.

Or gone to the neighbor's cocktail party (maybe not). But you
had to work. Because it was an emergency.

nancy

"Brooklyn1" <Gravesend1> wrote in message
...
> On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 14:38:56 -0800 (PST), Lenona >
> wrote:
>
>>Pretty amusing.
>>
>>Lenona.
>>
>>http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...icle325123.ece
>>
>>A proper postponement?
>>
>>Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>>who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
>>were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>>
>>At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
>>party until the following night. I replied no and I mentioned that I
>>had already prepared the food.
>>
>>The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
>>make it. I was stunned then, and I'm still stunned today. When I
>>looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m. I don't
>>know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
>>a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
>>have joined us later.
>> (much snippage)

>>Just please do not admit to spying on his car. This proves nothing, as
>>he could have been taken away in an ambulance, but is the sign of a
>>creepy neighbor.
>
> What kind of imbecile prepares HUNDREDS of $$$$$ in food for cocktails
> with two neighbors...

No kidding! Even if I served seafood cocktails which contain scallops and
shrimp it wouldn't cost hundreds of dollars.

> were it me all I'd have to do is put the bottles
> and glasses back in the bar hutch, rewrap a couple three cheeses, and
> close up two boxes of crackers... I'd have lost a little extra ice but
> I'd have learned that those neighbors belong on my Do Not Invite
> Douchebags list.
>
Not to mention, just because his car was in the driveway doesn't mean he
didn't have an emergency. Who knows what sort of emergency it is? The word
"emergency" doesn't necessarily equate to something medical or a reason for
his car to have moved. Maybe it was a work emergency. So many people work
from home these days, he could have been held up via phone by a tyrannical
boss and a computer. It happened to me often enough when I did software
tech support for a living, usually on holiday weekends.

Jill

On 31/01/2011 8:55 AM, jmcquown wrote:

> Not to mention, just because his car was in the driveway doesn't mean he
> didn't have an emergency. Who knows what sort of emergency it is? The
> word "emergency" doesn't necessarily equate to something medical or a
> reason for his car to have moved. Maybe it was a work emergency. So many
> people work from home these days, he could have been held up via phone
> by a tyrannical boss and a computer. It happened to me often enough when
> I did software tech support for a living, usually on holiday weekends.
>


There could be more to it than meets the eye, Perhaps it is a matter of
credibility. If someone can be counted on to remember an invitation and
to show up, they might be more readily excused for an emergency. If
OTOH, they have a more causal approach to invitations and sometimes
don't show up, their excuses might be treated with a little more
skepticism.

One of my nephews is notorious for being late, really late. My FiL used
to have a family Christmas party/ birthday party the weekend before
Christmas. Nephew lived closer than anyone else, but he was always late.
He always had an excuse, but he was always late. The buffet was served
at 11:30 and Fil wanted us there for 11. We drove 80- miles and were
able to make it on time.

One year the nephew showed up after 1 pm. His excuse was that he had had
to take his daughter to the hospital the night before and didn't get
home until 2 am. I figured he was always late and always had an excuse,
and that he had just come up with a better excuse. No one questions
acts of kindness for infants.

I didn't buy the excuse. The daughter was living with her mother. If she
had to go to ER the mother would have taken her. He was free to come to
the party without her in the morning. Even if he didn't get home until
2 am he still had lots of time to get some sleep and be there for 11.

Lenona > wrote in news:d2d636b2-add5-49f0-9c35-
:

> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us.

Who the hell has cocktail parties anymore? They were all the rage in the
50's and 60's but I assumed there were none anymore.

Perhaps it was code for "get them drunk and let's see if they swing". :-)

--

On the first day God created the sun - so the Devil countered
and created sunburn. On the second day God created sex. In
response the Devil created marriage. On the third day God created
an economist. This was a tough one for the Devil, but in the end
and after a lot of thought he created a second economist!

http://www.blabbinit.com/content/god-created-economist

On Mon, 31 Jan 2011 08:55:09 -0500, "jmcquown" >
wrote:

>"Brooklyn1" <Gravesend1> wrote in message
.. .
>> On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 14:38:56 -0800 (PST), Lenona >
>> wrote:
>>
>>>Pretty amusing.
>>>
>>>Lenona.
>>>
>>>http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...icle325123.ece
>>>
>>>A proper postponement?
>>>
>>>Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>>>who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
>>>were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>>>
>>>At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
>>>party until the following night. I replied no and I mentioned that I
>>>had already prepared the food.
>>>
>>>The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
>>>make it. I was stunned then, and I'm still stunned today. When I
>>>looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m. I don't
>>>know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
>>>a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
>>>have joined us later.
>>> (much snippage)
>
>>>Just please do not admit to spying on his car. This proves nothing, as
>>>he could have been taken away in an ambulance, but is the sign of a
>>>creepy neighbor.
>>
>> What kind of imbecile prepares HUNDREDS of $$$$$ in food for cocktails
>> with two neighbors...
>
>No kidding! Even if I served seafood cocktails which contain scallops and
>shrimp it wouldn't cost hundreds of dollars.
>
>> were it me all I'd have to do is put the bottles
>> and glasses back in the bar hutch, rewrap a couple three cheeses, and
>> close up two boxes of crackers... I'd have lost a little extra ice but
>> I'd have learned that those neighbors belong on my Do Not Invite
>> Douchebags list.
>>
>Not to mention, just because his car was in the driveway doesn't mean he
>didn't have an emergency. Who knows what sort of emergency it is? The word
>"emergency" doesn't necessarily equate to something medical or a reason for
>his car to have moved. Maybe it was a work emergency. So many people work
>from home these days, he could have been held up via phone by a tyrannical
>boss and a computer. It happened to me often enough when I did software
>tech support for a living, usually on holiday weekends.

That wifey wouldn't give the nature of the emergency smells fishy...
the most likely reason for a last minute cancel with a nebulous
explanation is that they got a better offer.... most likely they got
the better offer much sooner but purposely waited till last minute to
make the "emergency" seem legitimate and left no time to make further
inquery... these people have done this before, they're experts at the
stand-up/leave-flat. Such douchebags get *permanently* removed from
my social calender. I'm not very good with accepting alibis, the two
lamest being "I forgot/I lost your phone number"... in this day and
age of cell phones and email it's not possible to forget, especially
not possible to lose a phone number.

On Mon, 31 Jan 2011 10:37:15 -0500, Brooklyn1 wrote:

> I don't want a lot
> of friends,

i'm guessing that there's no problem there.

blake

On Mon, 31 Jan 2011 08:51:02 -0600, Michel Boucher
> wrote:

>Lenona > wrote in news:d2d636b2-add5-49f0-9c35-
:
>
>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us.
>
>Who the hell has cocktail parties anymore? They were all the rage in the
>50's and 60's but I assumed there were none anymore.
>
>Perhaps it was code for "get them drunk and let's see if they swing". :-)

Most likely. Two couples do not a cocktail party make, or any kind of
party, not even an orgy. Sounds more like a get together for crack
heads.

On Mon, 31 Jan 2011 16:29:43 -0000, Janet > wrote:

>In article >, Brooklyn1
>says...
>
>> That wifey wouldn't give the nature of the emergency smells fishy...
>
> IME, in an emergency people
> may not have time (or inclination) for explanations, or may need to
>clear their phone line to make or recieve other calls to deal with it.
>
> Janet.

If someone has time to make a call to cancel then they have time to
say why. If they don't have an inclination to make a brief
explanation then they are not someone I ever want to bother with
again. Wasting someones time/effort/expense requires an explanation
and an apology. There is never an excuse for the manners (lack of)
you were taught.

On Mon, 31 Jan 2011 12:18:02 -0500, blake murphy
> wrote:

>On Mon, 31 Jan 2011 10:37:15 -0500, Brooklyn1 wrote:
>
>> I don't want a lot
>> of friends,
>
>i'm guessing that there's no problem there.

True. I'm very selective.

Michel Boucher wrote:
> Lenona > wrote in news:d2d636b2-add5-49f0-9c35-
> :
>
>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us.
>
> Who the hell has cocktail parties anymore? They were all the rage in
> the 50's and 60's but I assumed there were none anymore.

These people are apparently in the 70 plus age range. I don't
know why I kind of thought a party would be more than two
couples, anyway. The whole scenario is weird.

nancy

"Nancy Young" > wrote in news:4d4708a6$0$7190
:

> Michel Boucher wrote:
>> Lenona > wrote in news:d2d636b2-add5-49f0-9c35-
>> :
>>
>>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us.
>>
>> Who the hell has cocktail parties anymore? They were all the rage in
>> the 50's and 60's but I assumed there were none anymore.
>
> These people are apparently in the 70 plus age range. I don't
> know why I kind of thought a party would be more than two
> couples, anyway. The whole scenario is weird.

It would have been more accurate to say they invited another couple over
for cocktails. A cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots of people
you know so they can meet lots of other people you know. My parents had a
few of those back in the 60's where civil servants, politicians and foreign
diplomats would mingle. It was usually well seen to reciprocate after a
certain number of invitations.

--

On the first day God created the sun - so the Devil countered
and created sunburn. On the second day God created sex. In
response the Devil created marriage. On the third day God created
an economist. This was a tough one for the Devil, but in the end
and after a lot of thought he created a second economist!

http://www.blabbinit.com/content/god-created-economist

Michel Boucher > wrote:

>It would have been more accurate to say they invited another couple over
>for cocktails. A cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots of people
>you know so they can meet lots of other people you know. My parents had a
>few of those back in the 60's where civil servants, politicians and foreign
>diplomats would mingle.

Sounds straight out of "Secret Agent".

I've never been to a party where they handed you a martini immediately as
you arrived, like in the 60's movies and TV shows. I think the modern
protocol is to discuss and negotiate a martini.


S.

Michel Boucher wrote:
> A cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots of people you know
> so they can meet lots of other people you know.


That sounds dreadful. I don't *want* the people I know to meet each
other. ;-)

-Bob

"Michel Boucher" schrieb :
> Lenona wrote :
>
>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us.
>
> Who the hell has cocktail parties anymore? They were all the rage in the
> 50's and 60's but I assumed there were none anymore.
>
> Perhaps it was code for "get them drunk and let's see if they swing". :-)
>
That would also explain the several hundred dollars (cocaine can be used
in many ways ;-)). If that's the case, I understand the complaint to Miss
Manners ...
The poor dear got everything together to get laid by the good-looking
neighbor and ended up with her husband ....

Cheers,

Michael Kuettner

(Steve Pope) wrote in
:

>>It would have been more accurate to say they invited another couple
>>over for cocktails. A cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots of
>>people you know so they can meet lots of other people you know. My
>>parents had a few of those back in the 60's where civil servants,
>>politicians and foreign diplomats would mingle.
>
> Sounds straight out of "Secret Agent".

My mother liked to hang around with Soviet diplomats because they were
always laughing and having a good time.

--

On the first day God created the sun - so the Devil countered
and created sunburn. On the second day God created sex. In
response the Devil created marriage. On the third day God created
an economist. This was a tough one for the Devil, but in the end
and after a lot of thought he created a second economist!

http://www.blabbinit.com/content/god-created-economist

"zxcvbob" > wrote in message
...
> Michel Boucher wrote:
>> A cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots of people you know
>> so they can meet lots of other people you know.
>
>
> That sounds dreadful. I don't *want* the people I know to meet each
> other. ;-)

<g>

--
--
https://www.shop.helpforheroes.org.uk/

On 31/01/2011 9:51 AM, Michel Boucher wrote:
> > wrote in news:d2d636b2-add5-49f0-9c35-
> :
>
>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us.
>
> Who the hell has cocktail parties anymore? They were all the rage in the
> 50's and 60's but I assumed there were none anymore.
>
> Perhaps it was code for "get them drunk and let's see if they swing". :-)


I know people who have cocktail parties. There are fun. When we go to
family camp at the end of August we live for the cocktail parties. We
used to take turns hosting them but they evolved into pot luck affairs
with all sorts of great treats. Best part is, it is very primitive
setting so everything has to be kept in coolers and tables and trays
have to be improvised.

Dave Smith wrote:

> I know people who have cocktail parties. There are fun. When we go to
> family camp at the end of August we live for the cocktail parties. We
> used to take turns hosting them but they evolved into pot luck affairs
> with all sorts of great treats. Best part is, it is very primitive
> setting so everything has to be kept in coolers and tables and trays
> have to be improvised.
>
They most certainly can be fun! Christine Dabney would be a fun hostess
for a cocktail party because she seems to have such fun with various
cocktails. I have family down in The Villages, Fl where the entire
community partakes of happy hour daily on the town square with live
music and they appear to have a lot of fun. My liver couldn't handle
it, I swear. LOL

On Mon, 31 Jan 2011 14:12:11 -0600, zxcvbob >
wrote:

>Michel Boucher wrote:
>> A cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots of people you know
>> so they can meet lots of other people you know.
>
>
>That sounds dreadful. I don't *want* the people I know to meet each
>other. ;-)

You mean you don't tell everyone the same BS? <G>

On Jan 27, 4:59*pm, Brooklyn1 <Gravesend1> wrote:
> On Thu, 27 Jan 2011 14:38:56 -0800 (PST), Lenona >
> wrote:
>
>
>
>
>
> >Pretty amusing.
>
> >Lenona.
>
> >http://www.buffalonews.com/life/colu...ners/article32...
>
> >A proper postponement?
>
> >Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
> >who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us. They
> >were supposed to arrive at our house at 6 p.m.
>
> >At 5 p.m. that same evening they called to ask us to postpone this
> >party until the following night. I replied no and I mentioned that I
> >had already prepared the food.
>
> >The wife mentioned that the husband had an emergency and could not
> >make it. I was stunned then, and I m still stunned today. When I
> >looked outside, his car was parked in his spot at 6:15 p. m. I don t
> >know how to react to this. To me, she should have maybe showed up for
> >a short time to show us that this reason was legitimate and he could
> >have joined us later.
>
> >I spoke to her later and she appears like nothing happened and does
> >not care that we lost hundreds of dollars worth of food and the time
> >it took us to prepare the party. This has never happened to me in 50
> >years. I had people cancel the day before, the morning of but never
> >one hour before. How would Miss Manners react?
>
> >Gentle Reader: With amazement that cocktail food for four people could
> >cost hundreds of dollars. What were you serving buckets of caviar?
>
> >The answer is that while your neighbors were wrong to treat the
> >occasion so lightly, you are treating it rather heavily. Stopping by
> >for drinks with the neighbors does sound like a casual event that
> >could easily be postponed, in contrast to an elaborate cocktail party,
> >which is presumed to involve major preparation and a goodly number of
> >guests. Had you invited them for dinner perhaps they might have taken
> >the invitation more seriously.
>
> >But it is open to you to make your point by inquiring sympathetically
> >about the emergency is he all right? Is there anything you can do to
> >help?
>
> >Just please do not admit to spying on his car. This proves nothing, as
> >he could have been taken away in an ambulance, but is the sign of a
> >creepy neighbor.
>
> What kind of imbecile prepares HUNDREDS of $$$$$ in food for cocktails
> with two neighbors... were it me all I'd have to do is put the bottles
> and glasses back in the bar hutch, rewrap a couple three cheeses, and
> close up two boxes of crackers... I'd have lost a little extra ice but
> I'd have learned that those neighbors belong on my Do Not Invite
> Douchebags list.

Precisely.

On Jan 28, 10:28*am, blake murphy > wrote:
>
> > I, too, was wondering about that "hundreds of dollars". *What
> > planet does this person live on?
>
> maybe she enters cocaine expenses as a food item.

LOL!

On Jan 31, 1:26*pm, Michel Boucher > wrote:
>
> It would have been more accurate to say they invited another couple over
> for cocktails. *A cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots of people
> you know so they can meet lots of other people you know. *My parents had a
> few of those back in the 60's where civil servants, politicians and foreign
> diplomats would mingle. *It was usually well seen to reciprocate after a
> certain number of invitations.

Wow, are you Dick Grayson?

On Mon, 31 Jan 2011 08:51:02 -0600, Michel Boucher
> arranged random neurons and said:

>Lenona > wrote in news:d2d636b2-add5-49f0-9c35-
:
>
>> Dear Miss Manners: A few weeks ago, my husband and I invited a couple
>> who are neighbors to a small cocktail party, just the four of us.
>
>Who the hell has cocktail parties anymore? They were all the rage in the
>50's and 60's but I assumed there were none anymore.
>
>Perhaps it was code for "get them drunk and let's see if they swing". :-)

Au contraire - we had a housewarming when we first moved into the new
joint last spring that was essentially a cocktail party. Lots and lots
of hors d'oeuvres and a wide open bar, late on a Sunday afternoon. It
was a big hit and we'll likely do something similar down the road when
we want to host a large group. Some years ago, we used to do a
Margarita Party, wherein I made darned near every Mexican dish in my
repertoire and the margaritas were served by the bucket. Again,
essentially a cocktail party - enough food to (somewhat) offset the
drinks and a good time is had by all. And the neighborhood's annual
block party is just a cocktail party out on the street.

Terry "Squeaks" Pulliam Burd

--

"If the soup had been as warm as the wine,
if the wine had been as old as the turkey,
and if the turkey had had a breast like the maid,
it would have been a swell dinner." Duncan Hines


To reply, remove "spambot" and replace it with "cox"

On 1/29/2011 10:18 AM, Stan Horwitz wrote:
> I agree. The reality in life is that shit happens. Maybe the who had an
> emergency husband got a ride to work or perhaps he was working from home
> and telecommuting. I work in IT and I am always on call. At any given
> moment in time, I could be called into work for an emergency. Unless I
> have an unavoidable personal situation that conflicts with the request,
> I am expected to be there. In fact, just yesterday, I had an issue occur
> at work, but I also had to make an emergency visit to the dentist at the
> same time, so the work matter had to wait while I got a root canal.
>
> One day last summer, I was out with friends celebrating a birthday. We
> were dining at a nice steak house. Just as we finished our meal, I
> received a call from work. I stepped out into the lobby to take the call
> and it was a panicked co-worker who desperately needed my help
> recovering a server with a failed hard drive. Never mind that I was the
> guest of honor who's birthday was being celebrated. I had to go to work
> immediately because that server fed payroll jobs that had to be
> processed. That was around 7:00pm. I did not finish with the emergency
> until around 5:30 the next morning. I was up all night. Believe me, the
> last thing I wanted to do was interrupt my own birthday celebration to
> sit with a co-worker in my office all night restoring data to his failed
> disk, but that's what I had to do. Fortunately, I succeeded and all the
> batch jobs that had to run that morning, ran. I would have much rather
> lingered over dinner longer and went out shopping with my friends.
>
> Fortunately, my friends know that when I make plans, its always
> tentative and most of my friends work in IT, so they know the drill. As
> it happens, I rarely have to cancel my plans due to work, but it does
> happen maybe two or three times a year.

Happy belated birthday.

It sounds like we have the same job. lol In IT we're expected to be on
call all the time. Yet now where I work, because some people have abused
the "work from home" perk, we're now all expected to be in the office
during business hours, even if we know we have some after hours work to
do unless it is approved ahead of time. And when it comes to emergency
situations that might take all night to fix, we're expected to be in the
office at our regular time, AND put in a full 8 hours, not including an
hour for lunch. It's starting to really suck where I work because of a
few idiots.

Cheryl > wrote:

> Yet now where I work, because some people have abused the
> "work from home" perk, we're now all expected to be in the
> office during business hours, even if we know we have some
> after hours work to do unless it is approved ahead of time.

I hate it when that happens...

S.

projectile vomit chick > wrote in
:

>> It would have been more accurate to say they invited another couple
>> over for cocktails. ÿA cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots
>> of people you know so they can meet lots of other people you know. My
>> parents had a few of those back in the 60's where civil servants,
>> politicians and foreign diplomats would mingle. It was usually well
>> seen to reciprocate after a certain number of invitations.
>
> Wow, are you Dick Grayson?

I'm not sure what Dick Grayson has to do with living through the 1960's,
but...no.

--

On the first day God created the sun - so the Devil countered
and created sunburn. On the second day God created sex. In
response the Devil created marriage. On the third day God created
an economist. This was a tough one for the Devil, but in the end
and after a lot of thought he created a second economist!

http://www.blabbinit.com/content/god-created-economist

Terry Pulliam Burd > wrote in
:

>>Perhaps it was code for "get them drunk and let's see if they swing". :-)
>
> Au contraire - we had a housewarming when we first moved into the new
> joint last spring that was essentially a cocktail party.

But it wasn't just you and another couple.

--

On the first day God created the sun - so the Devil countered
and created sunburn. On the second day God created sex. In
response the Devil created marriage. On the third day God created
an economist. This was a tough one for the Devil, but in the end
and after a lot of thought he created a second economist!

http://www.blabbinit.com/content/god-created-economist

Michel Boucher wrote:
> projectile vomit chick > wrote in
> :
>
>>> It would have been more accurate to say they invited another couple
>>> over for cocktails. ÿA cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots
>>> of people you know so they can meet lots of other people you know. My
>>> parents had a few of those back in the 60's where civil servants,
>>> politicians and foreign diplomats would mingle. It was usually well
>>> seen to reciprocate after a certain number of invitations.
>> Wow, are you Dick Grayson?
>
> I'm not sure what Dick Grayson has to do with living through the 1960's,
> but...no.
>

Robin, the boy wonder, in the 60's Batman TV series. (played by Burt
Ward) So the 60's is when the character went prime-time. But I don't
know what it has to do with cocktail parties.

-Bob

--
"Nana nana nana nana nana nana nana nah, BATMAN!"

zxcvbob > wrote in
:

> Michel Boucher wrote:
>> projectile vomit chick > wrote in
>>
>> :
>>
>>>> It would have been more accurate to say they invited another couple
>>>> over for cocktails. ˜A cocktail party is an occasion to invite lots
>>>> of people you know so they can meet lots of other people you know.
>>>> My parents had a few of those back in the 60's where civil
>>>> servants, politicians and foreign diplomats would mingle. It was
>>>> usually well seen to reciprocate after a certain number of
>>>> invitations.
>>>
>>> Wow, are you Dick Grayson?
>>
>> I'm not sure what Dick Grayson has to do with living through the
>> 1960's, but...no.
>
> Robin, the boy wonder, in the 60's Batman TV series. (played by Burt
> Ward) So the 60's is when the character went prime-time. But I don't
> know what it has to do with cocktail parties.

Thanks but I am aware who Dick Grayson is (in fiction of course).

--

On the first day God created the sun - so the Devil countered
and created sunburn. On the second day God created sex. In
response the Devil created marriage. On the third day God created
an economist. This was a tough one for the Devil, but in the end
and after a lot of thought he created a second economist!

http://www.blabbinit.com/content/god-created-economist