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Default The Birthday Party

PeterLucas wrote:
>
> LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would add some
> 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)


I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore. I used to take pictures
of her along with the rest of the family at family functions but my wife
accused me of taking pictures only when she was eating. Our son pointed out
that she is always eating.
She is not as enormous as you might expect, and the issue is not her
size.... until she sat on her husband's knee while he was seated in an
expensive leather swivel chair. It just ain't built for close to 700 lb.
My issue with her is that she eats so much. She can clear a buffet single
handed and still sneak through the pantry when she thinks no one is looking
and open up boxes.... even boxes of crackers when there are already some of
the same crackers on the buffet. YOu don't need to steal food when it is
being offered for free.
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Dave Smith wrote:
>
> PeterLucas wrote:
> >
> > LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would add some
> > 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)

>
> I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore. I used to take pictures
> of her along with the rest of the family at family functions but my wife
> accused me of taking pictures only when she was eating. Our son pointed out
> that she is always eating.


I suspect your wife wouldn't have pointed that out
if there wasn't at least some truth to that.

> She is not as enormous as you might expect, and the issue is not her
> size.... until she sat on her husband's knee while he was seated in an
> expensive leather swivel chair. It just ain't built for close to 700 lb.
> My issue with her is that she eats so much. She can clear a buffet single
> handed and still sneak through the pantry when she thinks no one is looking
> and open up boxes.... even boxes of crackers when there are already some of
> the same crackers on the buffet. YOu don't need to steal food when it is
> being offered for free.


I seem to recall a comic book from my childhood
which was mostly about a girl who was constantly
eating.

Ah, yes. Thank you, Wikipedia.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_Lotta
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Mark Thorson wrote:
>
> > I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore. I used to take pictures
> > of her along with the rest of the family at family functions but my wife
> > accused me of taking pictures only when she was eating. Our son pointed out
> > that she is always eating.

>
> I suspect your wife wouldn't have pointed that out
> if there wasn't at least some truth to that.


She has a soft spot for her because she was her first niece and swallowed
the excuse that the girl was premature and force fed as a baby so never
learned to turn off her hunger. As I indicated, my son suggested that it is
not easy to get a picture of her not eating because she is always always
eating. He stayed with her overnight once and told me about a trip to the
grocery store where she stopped at a convenience store and bought a large
bag of chips and ate them all on the way to the grocery store, then stopped
at the convenience store on the way home and bought a second large bag of
potato chips that she ate before they got home. That is two large bags of
potato chips consumed during a trip to the grocery stores. Don't you find
that alarming?

>
> > She is not as enormous as you might expect, and the issue is not her
> > size.... until she sat on her husband's knee while he was seated in an
> > expensive leather swivel chair. It just ain't built for close to 700 lb.
> > My issue with her is that she eats so much. She can clear a buffet single
> > handed and still sneak through the pantry when she thinks no one is looking
> > and open up boxes.... even boxes of crackers when there are already some of
> > the same crackers on the buffet. YOu don't need to steal food when it is
> > being offered for free.

>
> I seem to recall a comic book from my childhood
> which was mostly about a girl who was constantly
> eating.
>
> Ah, yes. Thank you, Wikipedia.
>
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_Lotta



I remember that comic. She is not exactly like that. She would never
order such a huge serving in one shot. She would have a small one and eat
it very daintily, and then another, and another and another.
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Dave Smith wrote:
> PeterLucas wrote:
>> LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would add some
>> 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)

>
> I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore. I used to take pictures
> of her along with the rest of the family at family functions but my wife
> accused me of taking pictures only when she was eating. Our son pointed out
> that she is always eating.
> She is not as enormous as you might expect, and the issue is not her
> size.... until she sat on her husband's knee while he was seated in an
> expensive leather swivel chair. It just ain't built for close to 700 lb.
> My issue with her is that she eats so much. She can clear a buffet single
> handed and still sneak through the pantry when she thinks no one is looking
> and open up boxes.... even boxes of crackers when there are already some of
> the same crackers on the buffet. YOu don't need to steal food when it is
> being offered for free.



"If no one sees me eating it, I didn't eat it...."

gloria p
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Oh pshaw, on Mon 08 Oct 2007 05:26:05p, Dave Smith meant to say...

> PeterLucas wrote:
>>
>> LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would add
>> some 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)

>
> I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore. I used to take
> pictures of her along with the rest of the family at family functions
> but my wife accused me of taking pictures only when she was eating. Our
> son pointed out that she is always eating.
> She is not as enormous as you might expect, and the issue is not her
> size.... until she sat on her husband's knee while he was seated in an
> expensive leather swivel chair. It just ain't built for close to 700 lb.
> My issue with her is that she eats so much. She can clear a buffet
> single handed and still sneak through the pantry when she thinks no one
> is looking and open up boxes.... even boxes of crackers when there are
> already some of the same crackers on the buffet. YOu don't need to
> steal food when it is being offered for free.


As we all know from past threads, this girl/woman has serious mental
issues related to food. Untreated, she will probably eat herself to
death.

--
Wayne Boatwright
__________________________________________________

All dogs go to heaven. Cats watch them leave.



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Dave Smith > wrote in
:

> PeterLucas wrote:
>>
>> LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would add
>> some 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)

>
> I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore.



That's convenient.

So post one of your previous shots of her.

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PeterLucas wrote:
>
> Dave Smith > wrote in
> :
>
> > PeterLucas wrote:
> >>
> >> LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would add
> >> some 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)

> >
> > I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore.

>
> That's convenient.
>
> So post one of your previous shots of her.


Why do you need a picture of her? It is not her size that bothers me. The
problem with her size is that she is apparently self conscious about her
weight. She has every reason to be self conscious about it. She is huge.
She is surprisingly not so huge as you might expect, considering how much
she eats.... but still huge. It is the fact that he is a compulsive eater,
one who goes through a buffet table and lays it bare like a swarm of
locusts. The last time she was here I saw here lay into the devilled eggs.
She did not take one or two and move on. She stood there and ate them one
after another, a dozen eggs.... times two... 24 devilled eggs, and then she
slid over to the cheese tray and nibbled on that until several pounds of
cheese was gone. Granted, a few people got in there and cut off a piece of
cheese or two and moved on, but this niece stood there and nibbled until it
was all gone..... then moved to the cold cuts. And then I catch her opening
a box of crackers my pantry. Crackers for gawd's sake. There were crackers
on the table. Why did she need to open crackers? .... because she thought
she was alone and no one would see her?
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Myrl Jeffcoat wrote:
> On Oct 7, 3:32 pm, Mark Thorson > wrote:
>>
>> I wonder how accurate his description is.
>> Remember, we're only getting one view, and
>> it's Dave's view. When I recollect the saga
>> of the woman in front of him in line, I tend
>> to think that we should not accept his description
>> at face value.
>>
>> I'd suggest the niece has grounds for a lawsuit.- Hide quoted text -
>>

>
> Mark - You and I know, that is a gawd awful thought! Unfortunately
> the internet is in it's Wild Wild West days, with newsgroups being the
> most wild of all.


This isn't the Internet. If you expect Usenet and newsgroups to change
anytime soon you're in for a very long wait.

However, Dave should preface his statements with a
> comment like, "One of our neighbors who had dropped by, told me such
> and such about my neice, but I don't really remember who that neighbor
> was, because I was drinking too."


Where did he ever say a neighbor told him anything about his niece? He's
been writing about her poor dinner party ettiquette in the first person for
years now. I also don't recall him saying he was drunk. Everyone here is
so quick to jump on the "you must have been drunk" bandwagon they don't read
for comprehension. Yes, there was liquor served. So? She was there with
her husband. With her mother. He didn't mention they were shitfaced drunk,
just the niece.
Afterall, it appears third party
> libel is protected on the internet, and if you claim to be too drunk
> to remember what neighbor told you, then the neighbor is protected
> too!
>

WHAT neighbor?! You don't know WTF you're talking about.

> Alas, the internet - it will be awhile, before it is tamed and
> civilized like the rest of society - if it ever is at all;-)


Again, if you're waiting for *Usenet* newsgroups to calm down you'll be
waiting for another 40 years (at least)

Jill


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"Dave Smith" > wrote in message
...
>
> Why do you need a picture of her? It is not her size that bothers me. The
> problem with her size is that she is apparently self conscious about her
> weight. She has every reason to be self conscious about it. She is huge.
> She is surprisingly not so huge as you might expect, considering how much
> she eats.... but still huge. It is the fact that he is a compulsive
> eater,
> one who goes through a buffet table and lays it bare like a swarm of
> locusts. The last time she was here I saw here lay into the devilled eggs.
> She did not take one or two and move on. She stood there and ate them one
> after another, a dozen eggs.... times two... 24 devilled eggs, and then
> she
> slid over to the cheese tray and nibbled on that until several pounds of
> cheese was gone. Granted, a few people got in there and cut off a piece of
> cheese or two and moved on, but this niece stood there and nibbled until
> it
> was all gone..... then moved to the cold cuts.


She doesn't sound all that self conscious about her weight and eating in
front of others if she typically stuffs her face right there at the buffet
table for all to see. I mean, *two dozen* deviled eggs??


> And then I catch her opening
> a box of crackers my pantry. Crackers for gawd's sake. There were crackers
> on the table. Why did she need to open crackers? .... because she thought
> she was alone and no one would see her?


What do you say to her when you catch her helping herself to the food in
your pantry?

Mary


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Dave Smith > wrote in
:

> PeterLucas wrote:
>>
>> Dave Smith > wrote in
>> :
>>
>> > PeterLucas wrote:
>> >>
>> >> LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would
>> >> add some 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)
>> >
>> > I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore.

>>
>> That's convenient.
>>
>> So post one of your previous shots of her.

>
> Why do you need a picture of her?



To prove that you're not full of shit and are posting this crap just to get
people to sympathize with you, and talk to you.


Lessee, you have a 'niece' in Estonia, and you have a 'niece in Korea....
and you have a fat arsed niece where you live.





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MareCat wrote:

> She doesn't sound all that self conscious about her weight and eating in
> front of others if she typically stuffs her face right there at the buffet
> table for all to see.


I guess it is some sort of supplement???? I suspect she gets some sort of
pleasure from sneaking it.

> I mean, *two dozen* deviled eggs??

To be honest, not all 24, Perhaps only 18. It was early, before all the
others had arrived. The plate was almost full when she moseyed over to it,
and then they were all gone.

>
> > And then I catch her opening
> > a box of crackers my pantry. Crackers for gawd's sake. There were crackers
> > on the table. Why did she need to open crackers? .... because she thought
> > she was alone and no one would see her?

>
> What do you say to her when you catch her helping herself to the food in
> your pantry?


"Is there something we need out there?"
This time I instructed my wife to keep her out of the kitchen. She is her
niece, her sister's daughter, so she should deal with it. The girl has
already confronted me at a large party about why I don't like her.
Ironically, it was when I went into the kitchen to get more things to take
out to the party and she was eating crackers from a previously unopened
box.
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On Tue, 9 Oct 2007 05:20:56 +0000 (UTC), PeterLucas >
wrote:

>Dave Smith > wrote in
:
>
>> PeterLucas wrote:
>>>
>>> LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would add
>>> some 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)

>>
>> I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore.

>
>
>That's convenient.
>
>So post one of your previous shots of her.


for god's sake, peter. your obsession is almost as alarming as hers.

your pal,
blake
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On Tue, 9 Oct 2007 14:36:35 +0000 (UTC), PeterLucas >
wrote:

>Dave Smith > wrote in
:
>
>> PeterLucas wrote:
>>>
>>> Dave Smith > wrote in
>>> :
>>>
>>> > PeterLucas wrote:
>>> >>
>>> >> LOL!! Should have thought of that angle......... but a pic would
>>> >> add some 'weight' (truth) to the story. (No pun intended!!)
>>> >
>>> > I am not allowed to take pictures of her anymore.
>>>
>>> That's convenient.
>>>
>>> So post one of your previous shots of her.

>>
>> Why do you need a picture of her?

>
>
>To prove that you're not full of shit and are posting this crap just to get
>people to sympathize with you, and talk to you.
>
>
>Lessee, you have a 'niece' in Estonia, and you have a 'niece in Korea....
>and you have a fat arsed niece where you live.
>

*three* nieces! omgomgomg!!!! it's absolutely unheard of!!!

your pal,
blake

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Dave Smith wrote:
> My big fear was that this family includes the infamous big niece....
> the one who eats non-stop and who also goes snooping through my pantry and
> helps herself to whatever she finds, and that includes taking it upon
> herself to open new boxes. I had told my wife ahead of time to keep the
> niece out of the kitchen and, better yet, out of the house. We were
> somewhat successful there.


Have you asked your niece not to raid your pantries?

Serene
--
Spin the auto-sig generator, and she says:

"The legitimate powers of government extend to such acts only as
are injurious to others. But it does me no injury for my
neighbor to say there are twenty gods, or no God. It neither
picks my pocket nor breaks my leg." -- Thomas Jefferson
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