Doris Night wrote:

> On Sat, 17 Mar 2018 18:22:42 GMT, Wayne Boatwright
> > wrote:
>
> > On Sat 17 Mar 2018 10:36:10a, Dave Smith told us...
> >
> >> On 2018-03-17 10:57 AM, wrote:
> >>> On Saturday, March 17, 2018 at 9:13:10 AM UTC-5, Wayne Boatwright
> >>> wrote:
> > > > >
> >>>> In the USA a "recepton" where the food is being contributed by
> >>>> some or all of the guests or attendees, it can easily be
> >>>> construed as a potluck. It doesn't matter whether its comprised
> >>>> of appetizes, main dishes or desserts. If it's catered or all
> >>>> provided by one source (family, company, etc.) then it's simply
> >>>> a reception of some sort. There are numerous references on the
> >>>> Internet to "potluck receptionss". Regardless of what Tert calls
> >>>> it, in my book it still sounds like a potluck.
> > > > >
> > > > >
> >>> Maybe I'm wrong but I've always considered any reception, get
> >>> together, gathering, etc. when you are requested to bring a dish
> >>> of your choosing a potluck. If he's told to bring a specific
> >>> dish, and you're told to bring a specific dish, Jill is told to
> >>> bring a specific dish, Cheri is also told to bring a certain
> >>> dish, and I'm told to bring a certain dish, then no, I would not
> >>> call that a potluck.
> > > >
> >>
> >> I don't think you are wrong. Even if you are asked to bring a
> >> dessert, a salad, an appetizer..... as long as the dish is not
> >> specifically named, they get what you bring.... potluck.
> >>
> >> This is different from the party that my brother's friends were
> >> invited to. After accepting the invitation she was asked to bring
> >> specific items. She was asked to bring two roasted beef
> >> tenderloins. Note that was two entire roasted loins. She was
> >> also asked two bottles of wine, a red and a white. The hostess <?>
> >> told her which wines she wanted her to bring, and they expensive.
> >> Never mind that this friend rarely drinks and that her husband
> >> does not drink at all, they were looking at $175-200 to buy the
> >> items she was asked to contribute to the hostess' husband's
> >> birthday party. She made up an excuse to make it to the party.
> >
> > If I were askeed to bring all of that, I certainl would not have
> > gone. That's unreasonable, and being taken advantage of.
>
> If I were asked to bring something like that, I would have arranged to
> be a last-minute no-show.
>
> Doris

I'd have told them no right up front. 'Thank you and we like you but I
don't have the time or money to handle that list I am requested to
bring'.

Simple, sends the point and isn't leaving them waiting for part of the
meal.

"cshenk" > wrote in message
...
> Doris Night wrote:
>
>> On Sat, 17 Mar 2018 18:22:42 GMT, Wayne Boatwright
>> > wrote:
>>
>> > On Sat 17 Mar 2018 10:36:10a, Dave Smith told us...
>> >
>> >> On 2018-03-17 10:57 AM, wrote:
>> >>> On Saturday, March 17, 2018 at 9:13:10 AM UTC-5, Wayne Boatwright
>> >>> wrote:
>> > > > >
>> >>>> In the USA a "recepton" where the food is being contributed by
>> >>>> some or all of the guests or attendees, it can easily be
>> >>>> construed as a potluck. It doesn't matter whether its comprised
>> >>>> of appetizes, main dishes or desserts. If it's catered or all
>> >>>> provided by one source (family, company, etc.) then it's simply
>> >>>> a reception of some sort. There are numerous references on the
>> >>>> Internet to "potluck receptionss". Regardless of what Tert calls
>> >>>> it, in my book it still sounds like a potluck.
>> > > > >
>> > > > >
>> >>> Maybe I'm wrong but I've always considered any reception, get
>> >>> together, gathering, etc. when you are requested to bring a dish
>> >>> of your choosing a potluck. If he's told to bring a specific
>> >>> dish, and you're told to bring a specific dish, Jill is told to
>> >>> bring a specific dish, Cheri is also told to bring a certain
>> >>> dish, and I'm told to bring a certain dish, then no, I would not
>> >>> call that a potluck.
>> > > >
>> >>
>> >> I don't think you are wrong. Even if you are asked to bring a
>> >> dessert, a salad, an appetizer..... as long as the dish is not
>> >> specifically named, they get what you bring.... potluck.
>> >>
>> >> This is different from the party that my brother's friends were
>> >> invited to. After accepting the invitation she was asked to bring
>> >> specific items. She was asked to bring two roasted beef
>> >> tenderloins. Note that was two entire roasted loins. She was
>> >> also asked two bottles of wine, a red and a white. The hostess <?>
>> >> told her which wines she wanted her to bring, and they expensive.
>> >> Never mind that this friend rarely drinks and that her husband
>> >> does not drink at all, they were looking at $175-200 to buy the
>> >> items she was asked to contribute to the hostess' husband's
>> >> birthday party. She made up an excuse to make it to the party.
>> >
>> > If I were askeed to bring all of that, I certainl would not have
>> > gone. That's unreasonable, and being taken advantage of.
>>
>> If I were asked to bring something like that, I would have arranged to
>> be a last-minute no-show.
>>
>> Doris
>
> I'd have told them no right up front. 'Thank you and we like you but I
> don't have the time or money to handle that list I am requested to
> bring'.
>
> Simple, sends the point and isn't leaving them waiting for part of the
> meal.


I'm with you. No means no, no excuses needed. Sort of like the JW when they
come to the door, no reason to lie, be rude etc. Simply say no, I am not
interested.

Cheri

On 2018-03-18 1:57 PM, cshenk wrote:
> Doris Night wrote:

> I'd have told them no right up front. 'Thank you and we like you but I
> don't have the time or money to handle that list I am requested to
> bring'.

You can skip the first part of the rejection. She barely knew the
hostess. AFAIK, she never had anything to do with her after that.

> Simple, sends the point and isn't leaving them waiting for part of the
> meal.

True perhaps, but if someone has the nerve to invite a person they
hardly know to attend a party and to provide close to $200 worth of
expensive beef and wine for her dinner party, she is setting herself up
for a huge disappointment. I not sure I could do that, but I sure
couldn't fault someone else for doing it.

Dave Smith wrote:

> On 2018-03-18 1:57 PM, cshenk wrote:
> > Doris Night wrote:
>
> > I'd have told them no right up front. 'Thank you and we like you
> > but I don't have the time or money to handle that list I am
> > requested to bring'.
>
> You can skip the first part of the rejection. She barely knew the
> hostess. AFAIK, she never had anything to do with her after that.
>
> > Simple, sends the point and isn't leaving them waiting for part of
> > the meal.
>
> True perhaps, but if someone has the nerve to invite a person they
> hardly know to attend a party and to provide close to $200 worth of
> expensive beef and wine for her dinner party, she is setting herself
> up for a huge disappointment. I not sure I could do that, but I sure
> couldn't fault someone else for doing it.

Well, if someone I barely knew sent an invite with that type of price
tag, I'd just have laughed (to myself) and politely refused.

In article >, cshenk1
@cox.net says...
> Subject: Call it what you will...
> From: cshenk >
> Newsgroups: rec.food.cooking
>
> Dave Smith wrote:
>
> > On 2018-03-18 1:57 PM, cshenk wrote:
> > > Doris Night wrote:
> >
> > > I'd have told them no right up front. 'Thank you and we like you
> > > but I don't have the time or money to handle that list I am
> > > requested to bring'.
> >
> > You can skip the first part of the rejection. She barely knew the
> > hostess. AFAIK, she never had anything to do with her after that.
> >
> > > Simple, sends the point and isn't leaving them waiting for part of
> > > the meal.
> >
> > True perhaps, but if someone has the nerve to invite a person they
> > hardly know to attend a party and to provide close to $200 worth of
> > expensive beef and wine for her dinner party, she is setting herself
> > up for a huge disappointment. I not sure I could do that, but I sure
> > couldn't fault someone else for doing it.
>
> Well, if someone I barely knew sent an invite with that type of price
> tag, I'd just have laughed (to myself) and politely refused.
>

Nah, the best revenge would be to accept the invitation but not turn
up, (no warning, no notice) leaving the hostess high and dry at the last
minute with no beef or booze.

She'll never ask you again. Win-win.

Janet UK



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