My random notes, in order of viewing:

This week's color: brown.

SLop has trouble opening the package of coffee, so she ends up using scissors.

SLop says she left the tenderloin sitting on the counter so it would be room
temperature. Alas, she also totally forgot her washing hands lessons from last
year.

She ties up the tenderloin while saying "Every inch has to be bound up in
string". Tenderloin is naturally in a tube shape, so why is SLop adding this
extra uncessary step?

Did SLop say "This is a threat" instead of "This is a treat"? Talk about a
Fraudian slip!

SLop provides us with a "great" trick, putting the pan the poatoes cooking in
back onto the stove top and then puts the mashers into a baking dish. She
smears wax paper with a lot butter, lays it ontop of the dish, and puts in the
oven. With the exception of that last dubious (and messy!) "tip", Mom's been
doing that all my life!

Argh! She used a FORK on that meat and then doesnt let it rest before she hacks
it apart! That meat is so overcooked.

SLop reminds us to remove the string because otherwise no one is going to eat
them! Finding string in anything you make is the least of one's worries, bitch.

SLop says that her new fake uncle is from Hawai'i; therefore he LOVES cofffee!

Why does she make brownies out of CAKE mix? Just buy the brownie mix, bitch.

Bwah! Blurred out plastic wrap!

SLop opens the fridge and says "Dont break the decor!" What?

SLop tells us flour the board, but didnt she say you already did that about 30
secs ago, when she began.

SLop butters the bread so the filling sticks to it, but if you roll the dough
up it won't matter.

It appeared that SLop was going to put the bread into the microwave before
someone offstage corrected her.

Bwah! The International Coffee tin was blurred out

Hmm, those rolls didnt expand much to fuill that dish, did they?

What's with the hip-shaking and eye rolling she does after chowing down

Was that "Zander" in the TGIFridays steak ad?

Sandra's Tips? No "Cocktail time!" popup?

Bwah! The bag of hershey chocolate chips were blurred out! Is this a record?

Conspiratorially SLop says we can make it a cocktail by dumping in vodka and/or
kaluha.

SLop decides to top the drink with a "chocolate chunk", then procedes to place
ONE lonely chococlate chip on top of the Cool Whip in each glass.

Good gawd! She put coffee beans and grounds in the bottom of candle jars and
then claimed that if the wax spills over it will make the house smell like
coffee!

SLop closes out this ep by double FN web site pimping (PLEASE try a recipe!
ANY one!) and closes out with "Keep it with caffeine!" The hell?

--
WARNING!!!
Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget, standing in
your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!! We assume no
liability from any illness or injury sustained while eating the "food" or being
exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no, we're not sure where she grew up
either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any knowlege of Miss Lee.

Ubiquitous wrote:
> My random notes, in order of viewing:
>
> This week's color: brown.
>
> SLop has trouble opening the package of coffee, so she ends up using
scissors.
>
> SLop says she left the tenderloin sitting on the counter so it would
be room
> temperature. Alas, she also totally forgot her washing hands lessons
from last
> year.
>
> She ties up the tenderloin while saying "Every inch has to be bound
up in
> string". Tenderloin is naturally in a tube shape, so why is SLop
adding this
> extra uncessary step?
>
> Did SLop say "This is a threat" instead of "This is a treat"? Talk
about a
> Fraudian slip!
>
> SLop provides us with a "great" trick, putting the pan the poatoes
cooking in
> back onto the stove top and then puts the mashers into a baking dish.
She
> smears wax paper with a lot butter, lays it ontop of the dish, and
puts in the
> oven. With the exception of that last dubious (and messy!) "tip",
Mom's been
> doing that all my life!
>
> Argh! She used a FORK on that meat and then doesnt let it rest before
she hacks
> it apart! That meat is so overcooked.
>
> SLop reminds us to remove the string because otherwise no one is
going to eat
> them! Finding string in anything you make is the least of one's
worries, bitch.
>
> SLop says that her new fake uncle is from Hawai'i; therefore he LOVES
cofffee!
>
> Why does she make brownies out of CAKE mix? Just buy the brownie mix,
bitch.
>
> Bwah! Blurred out plastic wrap!
>
> SLop opens the fridge and says "Dont break the decor!" What?
>
> SLop tells us flour the board, but didnt she say you already did that
about 30
> secs ago, when she began.
>
> SLop butters the bread so the filling sticks to it, but if you roll
the dough
> up it won't matter.
>
> It appeared that SLop was going to put the bread into the microwave
before
> someone offstage corrected her.
>
> Bwah! The International Coffee tin was blurred out
>
> Hmm, those rolls didnt expand much to fuill that dish, did they?
>
> What's with the hip-shaking and eye rolling she does after chowing
down
>
> Was that "Zander" in the TGIFridays steak ad?
>
> Sandra's Tips? No "Cocktail time!" popup?
>
> Bwah! The bag of hershey chocolate chips were blurred out! Is this a
record?
>
> Conspiratorially SLop says we can make it a cocktail by dumping in
vodka and/or
> kaluha.
>
> SLop decides to top the drink with a "chocolate chunk", then procedes
to place
> ONE lonely chococlate chip on top of the Cool Whip in each glass.
>
> Good gawd! She put coffee beans and grounds in the bottom of candle
jars and
> then claimed that if the wax spills over it will make the house smell
like
> coffee!
>
> SLop closes out this ep by double FN web site pimping (PLEASE try a
recipe!
> ANY one!) and closes out with "Keep it with caffeine!" The hell?
>
> --
> WARNING!!!
> Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
standing in
> your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!! We assume
no
> liability from any illness or injury sustained while eating the
"food" or being
> exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no, we're not sure where she grew
up
> either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any knowlege of Miss Lee.




Goodness, if she bothers you this much, turn the channel! You must
have been taking notes to give us a step-by-step description of
everything she did to annoy you. Whew!

Did SLop say "This is a threat" instead of "This is a treat"? Talk
about a
Fraudian slip!

--------

My guess is that Tits reads from cue cards, and she flubbed it.

Food For Thought wrote:
> My guess is that Tits reads from cue cards, and she flubbed it.

I was calling her Stovetop Barbie before I knew she actually used the stuff.
What a shame that cue cards should be needed to assist the halfbaked
information she has to impart.

She does need a bra, though. The pajama party episode was spellbinding. Who
knew she could carry so low!

My daughter and I watch her, though neither of us can stand her. She's good
for laughs -- nearly as pretentious as the BF Contessa but savvy enough to
keep it juvenile and avoid Ina's highbrow, Hampton's-esque, air kissing, ass
kissing buffoonery.

In article .com>,
wrote:

>Goodness, if she bothers you this much, turn the channel! You must
>have been taking notes to give us a step-by-step description of
>everything she did to annoy you. Whew!

Golley, you're no fun...

--
WARNING!!!
Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
standing in your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!! We
assume no liability from any illness or injury sustained while eating the
"food" or being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no, we're not sure
where she grew up either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any knowlege of Miss
Lee.

In article >, wrote:
>
>My random notes, in order of viewing:
>
>This week's color: brown.
>
>SLop has trouble opening the package of coffee, so she ends up using scissors.
>
>SLop says she left the tenderloin sitting on the counter so it would be room
>temperature. Alas, she also totally forgot her washing hands lessons from last
>year.
>
>She ties up the tenderloin while saying "Every inch has to be bound up in
>string". Tenderloin is naturally in a tube shape, so why is SLop adding this
>extra uncessary step?
>
>Did SLop say "This is a threat" instead of "This is a treat"? Talk about a
>Fraudian slip!
>
>SLop provides us with a "great" trick, putting the pan the poatoes cooking in
>back onto the stove top and then puts the mashers into a baking dish. She
>smears wax paper with a lot butter, lays it ontop of the dish, and puts in the
>oven. With the exception of that last dubious (and messy!) "tip", Mom's been
>doing that all my life!
>
>Argh! She used a FORK on that meat and then doesnt let it rest before she
>hacks it apart! That meat is so overcooked.
>
>SLop reminds us to remove the string because otherwise no one is going to eat
>them! Finding string in anything you make is the least of one's worries, bitch.
>
>SLop says that her new fake uncle is from Hawai'i; therefore he LOVES cofffee!
>
>Why does she make brownies out of CAKE mix? Just buy the brownie mix, bitch.
>
>Bwah! Blurred out plastic wrap!
>
>SLop opens the fridge and says "Dont break the decor!" What?
>
>SLop tells us flour the board, but didnt she say you already did that about 30
>secs ago, when she began.
>
>SLop butters the bread so the filling sticks to it, but if you roll the dough
>up it won't matter.
>
>It appeared that SLop was going to put the bread into the microwave before
>someone offstage corrected her.
>
>Bwah! The International Coffee tin was blurred out
>
>Hmm, those rolls didnt expand much to fuill that dish, did they?
>
>What's with the hip-shaking and eye rolling she does after chowing down
>
>Was that "Zander" in the TGIFridays steak ad?
>
>Sandra's Tips? No "Cocktail time!" popup?
>
>Bwah! The bag of hershey chocolate chips were blurred out! Is this a record?
>
>Conspiratorially SLop says we can make it a cocktail by dumping in vodka
>and/or kaluha.
>
>SLop decides to top the drink with a "chocolate chunk", then procedes to place
>ONE lonely chococlate chip on top of the Cool Whip in each glass.
>
>Good gawd! She put coffee beans and grounds in the bottom of candle jars and
>then claimed that if the wax spills over it will make the house smell like
>coffee!
>
>SLop closes out this ep by double FN web site pimping (PLEASE try a recipe!
>ANY one!) and closes out with "Keep it with caffeine!" The hell?

Random thoughts...

Was she main-lining coffee just before the show? Damn - that was one fierce coffee
buzz she was sporting.

What's with the turd sweater? I am loathe to admit that SLop and I share similar
coloring (hey! mine's natural), and I won't go near brown. The only thing that
color does is enhance the raccoon eyes.

The bread-in-the-brown-sugar trick was funny. "It keeps it nice and moist and it
doesn't get hard on you." Well, that's more information about the Wallet than I
ever wanted to know.

I have to laugh at the rub mixture. "Lets talk about the herbs we're going to put
INside of this rub." First of all, of the 5 things she dumped in there, only the
dried ground sage was an herb. Second, INside the rub? WTF?

That was a gorgeous piece of meat. It should come home with me where it will be
loved and treated properly.

Goat cheese? The stuff you buy in the regular grocery store is practically
flavorless. I use it when I need to add texture to something else, or if I marinade
it with a flavorful vinegar or herbs. If you're gonna doctor mashed taters, use a
nice stinky cheese. On the other hand, we should be happy she used a real cheese
and didn't dump ranch dressing into those poor poor taters.

I don't even think I can watch the rest. I'm going to curl up in a corner, hug my
Les Halles cookbook, and cry...