On Sun, 27 Feb 2011 08:04:51 -0600, (Blockade
Runner) wrote:

> Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> up etc. & time.
>
By menu, do you mean all the dishes presented on one show? No, but
maybe I'll make two. It's nice to see what the food presenter thinks
go together. It's inspiration, not a decree.
>
> Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.

Wow! Does your mommy still cook for you too? Sounds like you're not
very good at planning ahead. Better work on it. An attitude like
that won't get you very far in school or at work either - so your goal
is not just learning how to get a decent meal on the table, it's
general self improvement. Now go play with your trucks in the street.

--

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

"Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
...
Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
up etc. & time.
Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.


Michael Lane

---

You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he wants it.
It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done. Maybe some people
can cook that way but I can't. Of course I know approximately when rice or
pasta will be done. But I never know how long it will take for the meat to
be cooked through or the sauce to reduce. I would not do well on a show
like Chopped where there is an extreme time limit.

I have made some recipes from cooking shows but I have never made a complete
dinner like they do. For one thing I try to do a lot of one pot meals.
It's just far easier for cleanup, serving, etc. If it's not a one pot meal
then we will have a salad and a main dish, maybe a side if the main dish
doesn't contain protein. If we don't have a salad, we have some other sort
of vegetable. We rarely have dessert. Tonight I will be making pizza with
a pre-made crust and we will have salad from the salad bar at the store.
This is a meal I can do in less than a half an hour, including the time to
pre-heat the oven.

Most of what I make takes about a half an hour to cook. Maybe an hour at
the most. Of course some things take longer but often I will use the
Crock-Pot so they will be done when we need them. I used to do pots of
beans or pot roasts, but these things do not work for my lifestyle as it is
now.

On Feb 27, 4:39*pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> up etc. & time.
> Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
>
> Michael Lane
>
>
> You sound like my husband. *The instant he sees or smells food, he wants it.
> It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
> isn't home. *If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
> food. *Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>
>
We would probably be fighting daily, When he would start the
hollering for food I would just sit down and start watching tv. If he
wanted to know when he can eat I would tell him when he cooks his
dinner, that's when he can stuff his face.

You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?

"ItsJoanNotJoann" > wrote in message
...
On Feb 27, 4:39 pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> up etc. & time.
> Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
>
> Michael Lane
>
>
> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he wants
> it.
> It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
> isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
> food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>
>
We would probably be fighting daily, When he would start the
hollering for food I would just sit down and start watching tv. If he
wanted to know when he can eat I would tell him when he cooks his
dinner, that's when he can stuff his face.

You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?

Allow it? There is certainly no way to stop it. Frankly I don't care if he
eats or doesn't eat. How is that allowing it?

On Feb 27, 11:09*pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> "ItsJoanNotJoann" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> On Feb 27, 4:39 pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
>
>
>
> > "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> > Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> > to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> > up etc. & time.
> > Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> > not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
>
> > Michael Lane
>
> > You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he wants
> > it.
> > It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
> > isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
> > food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>
> We would probably be fighting daily, *When he would start the
> hollering for food I would just sit down and start watching tv. *If he
> wanted to know when he can eat I would tell him when he cooks his
> dinner, that's when he can stuff his face.
>
> You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?
>
> Allow it? *There is certainly no way to stop it. *Frankly I don't care if he
> eats or doesn't eat. *How is that allowing it?- Hide quoted text -
>
>
Does/did his mother say he exhibited this behavior as a child??

"ItsJoanNotJoann" > wrote in message
...
On Feb 27, 11:09 pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> "ItsJoanNotJoann" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> On Feb 27, 4:39 pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
>
>
>
> > "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> > Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> > to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> > up etc. & time.
> > Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> > not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
>
> > Michael Lane
>
> > You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he wants
> > it.
> > It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when
> > he
> > isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for
> > the
> > food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>
> We would probably be fighting daily, When he would start the
> hollering for food I would just sit down and start watching tv. If he
> wanted to know when he can eat I would tell him when he cooks his
> dinner, that's when he can stuff his face.
>
> You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?
>
> Allow it? There is certainly no way to stop it. Frankly I don't care if he
> eats or doesn't eat. How is that allowing it?- Hide quoted text -
>
>
Does/did his mother say he exhibited this behavior as a child??

Yep! He did it with her as an adult too. We just ignore it.

ItsJoanNotJoann wrote:

>> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he wants it.
>> It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
>> isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
>> food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>>
>>
> We would probably be fighting daily, When he would start the
> hollering for food I would just sit down and start watching tv. If he
> wanted to know when he can eat I would tell him when he cooks his
> dinner, that's when he can stuff his face.
>
> You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?

It certainly sounds like a miserable way to live. Can you imagine him
being invited to a friend's home for dinner and acting like a two year old?

"Goomba" > wrote in message
...
> ItsJoanNotJoann wrote:
>
>>> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he wants
>>> it.
>>> It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when
>>> he
>>> isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for
>>> the
>>> food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>>>
>>>
>> We would probably be fighting daily, When he would start the
>> hollering for food I would just sit down and start watching tv. If he
>> wanted to know when he can eat I would tell him when he cooks his
>> dinner, that's when he can stuff his face.
>>
>> You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?
>
> It certainly sounds like a miserable way to live. Can you imagine him
> being invited to a friend's home for dinner and acting like a two year
> old?

Well that never happens!

"Janet" > wrote in message
...
> In article >,
> says...
>>
>> "Goomba" > wrote in message
>> ...
>> > ItsJoanNotJoann wrote:
>> >
>> >>> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he
>> >>> wants
>> >>> it.
>> >>> It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it
>> >>> when
>> >>> he
>> >>> isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering
>> >>> for
>> >>> the
>> >>> food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>> >>>
>> >>>
>> >> We would probably be fighting daily, When he would start the
>> >> hollering for food I would just sit down and start watching tv. If he
>> >> wanted to know when he can eat I would tell him when he cooks his
>> >> dinner, that's when he can stuff his face.
>> >>
>> >> You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?
>> >
>> > It certainly sounds like a miserable way to live. Can you imagine him
>> > being invited to a friend's home for dinner and acting like a two year
>> > old?
>>
>> Well that never happens!
>
> Does he behave that way at work, to get his own way?

How should I know?

On 28/02/2011 1:25 AM, Goomba wrote:

>>
>> You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?
>
> It certainly sounds like a miserable way to live. Can you imagine him
> being invited to a friend's home for dinner and acting like a two year old?

And there is the daughter who behaves so badly in restaurants that she
has been tempted to walk out and leave the kid behind. I am getting the
impression of a very special family.

On Feb 27, 4:16*pm, ItsJoanNotJoann > wrote:
> On Feb 27, 4:39*pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
>
>
>
> > "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> > Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> > to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> > up etc. & time.
> > Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> > not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
>
> > Michael Lane
>
> > You sound like my husband. *The instant he sees or smells food, he wants it.
> > It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
> > isn't home. *If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
> > food. *Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>
> We would probably be fighting daily, *When he would start the
> hollering for food I would just sit down and start watching tv. *If he
> wanted to know when he can eat I would tell him when he cooks his
> dinner, that's when he can stuff his face.
>
> You know he only does this because you allow it, don't you?- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

That is exactly what I think- you are not his servant unless you allow
it. He should appreciate the effort you make to try to find something
you can/will eat...

On Feb 27, 4:39*pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> up etc. & time.
> Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
>
> Michael Lane
>
> ---
>
> You sound like my husband. *The instant he sees or smells food, he wants it.
> It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
> isn't home. *If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
> food. *Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.

Ick. Does he have Aspergers? I wouldn't tolerate such behavior!

"projectile vomit chick" > wrote in message
...
On Feb 27, 4:39 pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
>
> ...
> Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> up etc. & time.
> Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
>
> Michael Lane
>
> ---
>
> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he wants
> it.
> It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
> isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
> food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.

Ick. Does he have Aspergers? I wouldn't tolerate such behavior!

Dunno.

"Janet" > wrote in message
...
> In article >,
> says...
>>
>> "projectile vomit chick" > wrote in
>> message
>> ...
>> On Feb 27, 4:39 pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
>> > "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
>> >
>> > ...
>> > Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
>> > to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the
>> > clean
>> > up etc. & time.
>> > Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
>> > not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
>> >
>> > Michael Lane
>> >
>> > ---
>> >
>> > You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells food, he wants
>> > it.
>> > It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when
>> > he
>> > isn't home. If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for
>> > the
>> > food. Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>>
>> Ick. Does he have Aspergers? I wouldn't tolerate such behavior!
>>
>> Dunno.
>
> You and he both set a terrible role model to your daughter. He is
> teaching her adults use grossly unreasonable inappropriate behaviour and
> infantile demands and tantrums to get instant gratification, and you
> teach her your own compliance with bullying abuse is the domestic norm
> between partners.
>
> You are setting her up for conflict and unhappiness in her own adult
> relationships.

Oh! So now you're a psychologist?

In article <437a1298-b590-4100-a1bb-1657922053a1
@k15g2000prk.googlegroups.com>, says...
>
> On Feb 27, 4:39*pm, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> > "Blockade Runner" > wrote in message
> >
> > ...
> > Does anyone ever follow their menus ? I mean if I bought all the things
> > to make meal like they cook I be filing for bankruptcy . + all the clean
> > up etc. & time.
> > Seems like cheaper & lot easier eat out. When I am hyngry I am hungry,
> > not 5 hours later , I want to eat now.
> >
> > Michael Lane
> >
> > ---
> >
> > You sound like my husband. *The instant he sees or smells food, he wants it.
> > It is next to impossible to cook a meal for him unless I start it when he
> > isn't home. *If I start cooking when he is, he just keeps hollering for the
> > food. *Wants to know the exact minute it will be done.
>
> Ick. Does he have Aspergers? I wouldn't tolerate such behavior!

I don't even let my cats act like that, much less a family spouse or
child...

I_am_Tosk wrote:

> I don't even let my cats act like that, much less a family spouse or
> child...

I can't even imagine picking such DNA for the father of my offspring!
Why would someone marry such an oaf?

Julie Bove > wrote:

> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells
> food, he wants it. It is next to impossible to cook a meal for
> him unless I start it when he isn't home. If I start cooking
> when he is, he just keeps hollering for the food. Wants to
> know the exact minute it will be done. Maybe some people can
> cook that way but I can't. Of course I know approximately when
> rice or pasta will be done. But I never know how long it will
> take for the meat to be cooked through or the sauce to reduce.
> I would not do well on a show like Chopped where there is an
> extreme time limit.

It's unreasonable to demand food before it's ready, but I do
think it's reasonable to set a completion time and expect it
to be done then. One might have other things in one's schedule
after dinner. Also, in some cases, people need to eat at certain
times with respect to their medication schedules. (This has
often been true for me.)

Of course, a "completion time" can be a range. (7 to 8:30 p.m.)
If that's agreeable with folks.


Steve

"Steve Pope" > wrote in message
...
> Julie Bove > wrote:
>
>> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells
>> food, he wants it. It is next to impossible to cook a meal for
>> him unless I start it when he isn't home. If I start cooking
>> when he is, he just keeps hollering for the food. Wants to
>> know the exact minute it will be done. Maybe some people can
>> cook that way but I can't. Of course I know approximately when
>> rice or pasta will be done. But I never know how long it will
>> take for the meat to be cooked through or the sauce to reduce.
>> I would not do well on a show like Chopped where there is an
>> extreme time limit.
>
> It's unreasonable to demand food before it's ready, but I do
> think it's reasonable to set a completion time and expect it
> to be done then. One might have other things in one's schedule
> after dinner. Also, in some cases, people need to eat at certain
> times with respect to their medication schedules. (This has
> often been true for me.)
>
> Of course, a "completion time" can be a range. (7 to 8:30 p.m.)
> If that's agreeable with folks.

That would not be agreeable to him. He wants to know the exact minute.
That will never happen, given that I have a cat, a kid, a phone that rings
and all sort of other things that could crop up while I am cooking a meal.
I don't do complicated meals. I just don't. He has no patience.

On Feb 28, 4:13*am, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> "Steve Pope" > wrote in message
>
> ...
>
>
>
> > Julie Bove > wrote:
>
> >> You sound like my husband. *The instant he sees or smells
> >> food, he wants it. *It is next to impossible to cook a meal for
> >> him unless I start it when he isn't home. *If I start cooking
> >> when he is, he just keeps hollering for the food. *Wants to
> >> know the exact minute it will be done. *Maybe some people can
> >> cook that way but I can't. *Of course I know approximately when
> >> rice or pasta will be done. *But I never know how long it will
> >> take for the meat to be cooked through or the sauce to reduce.
> >> I would not do well on a show like Chopped where there is an
> >> extreme time limit.
>
> > It's unreasonable to demand food before it's ready, but I do
> > think it's reasonable to set a completion time and expect it
> > to be done then. *One might have other things in one's schedule
> > after dinner. *Also, in some cases, people need to eat at certain
> > times with respect to their medication schedules. *(This has
> > often been true for me.)
>
> > Of course, a "completion time" can be a range. *(7 to 8:30 p.m.)
> > If that's agreeable with folks.
>
> That would not be agreeable to him. *He wants to know the exact minute.
> That will never happen, given that I have a cat, a kid, a phone that rings
> and all sort of other things that could crop up while I am cooking a meal..
> I don't do complicated meals. *I just don't. *He has no patience.

Isn't he in the military? Perhaps this behavior comes from eating in
mess halls or some such. You're hungry, you go to the mess hall, they
slop it on your plate, and you eat. The food is there waiting for him
to go get it when he's ready. I knew someone who spent a lot of time
in the military, it took him a long time to get used to having to wait
for meals in a family environment. Like college kids who are used to
eating in the cafeteria, same thing... You're hungry, you go, choose
your food and eat, no waiting.

"Catmandy (Sheryl)" > wrote in message
...
On Feb 28, 4:13 am, "Julie Bove" > wrote:
> "Steve Pope" > wrote in message
>
> ...
>
>
>
> > Julie Bove > wrote:
>
> >> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells
> >> food, he wants it. It is next to impossible to cook a meal for
> >> him unless I start it when he isn't home. If I start cooking
> >> when he is, he just keeps hollering for the food. Wants to
> >> know the exact minute it will be done. Maybe some people can
> >> cook that way but I can't. Of course I know approximately when
> >> rice or pasta will be done. But I never know how long it will
> >> take for the meat to be cooked through or the sauce to reduce.
> >> I would not do well on a show like Chopped where there is an
> >> extreme time limit.
>
> > It's unreasonable to demand food before it's ready, but I do
> > think it's reasonable to set a completion time and expect it
> > to be done then. One might have other things in one's schedule
> > after dinner. Also, in some cases, people need to eat at certain
> > times with respect to their medication schedules. (This has
> > often been true for me.)
>
> > Of course, a "completion time" can be a range. (7 to 8:30 p.m.)
> > If that's agreeable with folks.
>
> That would not be agreeable to him. He wants to know the exact minute.
> That will never happen, given that I have a cat, a kid, a phone that rings
> and all sort of other things that could crop up while I am cooking a meal.
> I don't do complicated meals. I just don't. He has no patience.

Isn't he in the military? Perhaps this behavior comes from eating in
mess halls or some such. You're hungry, you go to the mess hall, they
slop it on your plate, and you eat. The food is there waiting for him
to go get it when he's ready. I knew someone who spent a lot of time
in the military, it took him a long time to get used to having to wait
for meals in a family environment. Like college kids who are used to
eating in the cafeteria, same thing... You're hungry, you go, choose
your food and eat, no waiting.

---

Yep. And for some odd reason he expects me to run this house like the
military. Ain't gonna happen!

In article >,
says...
>
> "Steve Pope" > wrote in message
> ...
> > Julie Bove > wrote:
> >
> >> You sound like my husband. The instant he sees or smells
> >> food, he wants it. It is next to impossible to cook a meal for
> >> him unless I start it when he isn't home. If I start cooking
> >> when he is, he just keeps hollering for the food. Wants to
> >> know the exact minute it will be done. Maybe some people can
> >> cook that way but I can't. Of course I know approximately when
> >> rice or pasta will be done. But I never know how long it will
> >> take for the meat to be cooked through or the sauce to reduce.
> >> I would not do well on a show like Chopped where there is an
> >> extreme time limit.
> >
> > It's unreasonable to demand food before it's ready, but I do
> > think it's reasonable to set a completion time and expect it
> > to be done then. One might have other things in one's schedule
> > after dinner. Also, in some cases, people need to eat at certain
> > times with respect to their medication schedules. (This has
> > often been true for me.)
> >
> > Of course, a "completion time" can be a range. (7 to 8:30 p.m.)
> > If that's agreeable with folks.
>
> That would not be agreeable to him. He wants to know the exact minute.
> That will never happen, given that I have a cat, a kid, a phone that rings
> and all sort of other things that could crop up while I am cooking a meal.
> I don't do complicated meals. I just don't. He has no patience.

Go to the store and stock up on a bunch of those 1 dollar tv dinners.
When he starts bitching go to the deep freeze, rip the box off a the
container, tear back the corner over the apple goo, and stick it in the
microwave. Then tell him, "dinner will be ready in 4 1/2 minutes and you
need to let it sit for 1 minute before you eat it".

.... then continue to make a nice dinner (just enough for the polite
family members), and serve "them" when it's done...

On Mon, 28 Feb 2011 10:17:38 -0500, I_am_Tosk
> wrote:

> Go to the store and stock up on a bunch of those 1 dollar tv dinners.
> When he starts bitching go to the deep freeze, rip the box off a the
> container, tear back the corner over the apple goo, and stick it in the
> microwave. Then tell him, "dinner will be ready in 4 1/2 minutes and you
> need to let it sit for 1 minute before you eat it".
>
> ... then continue to make a nice dinner (just enough for the polite
> family members), and serve "them" when it's done...

Great idea, except I'd tell him to go to the freezer and do it
himself.

--

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

Julie Bove > wrote:

>"Steve Pope" > wrote in message

>> It's unreasonable to demand food before it's ready, but I do
>> think it's reasonable to set a completion time and expect it
>> to be done then. One might have other things in one's schedule
>> after dinner. Also, in some cases, people need to eat at certain
>> times with respect to their medication schedules. (This has
>> often been true for me.)

>> Of course, a "completion time" can be a range. (7 to 8:30 p.m.)
>> If that's agreeable with folks.

>That would not be agreeable to him. He wants to know the exact minute.

That should usually be possible. And 15 minutes would be a reasonable
window almost always.

>That will never happen, given that I have a cat, a kid, a phone that rings
>and all sort of other things that could crop up while I am cooking a meal.

In my priority system, phone calls and most events involving cats
should not be allowed to interrupt cooking in almost all cases.
Things don't "crop up" while I'm cooking because I've decided to cook.

>I don't do complicated meals. I just don't. He has no patience.

Sounds to me like the reasonable flow is somewhere in between what
he is demanding and what you are offering.

(This topic resonates with me as I once was in the situation of taking
night classes that started at 8:00 pm, meaning I had to leave the house
at 7:05 and therefore wanted dinner prepared no later than 6:45.
My partner for several weeks had a lot of trouble meeting this timing,
usually for no real reason other than not doing the prep in the right
sequence. Before the end of the semester they got it down, though.)

Steve

On 28/02/2011 12:46 PM, Steve Pope wrote:

> Sounds to me like the reasonable flow is somewhere in between what
> he is demanding and what you are offering.
>
> (This topic resonates with me as I once was in the situation of taking
> night classes that started at 8:00 pm, meaning I had to leave the house
> at 7:05 and therefore wanted dinner prepared no later than 6:45.
> My partner for several weeks had a lot of trouble meeting this timing,
> usually for no real reason other than not doing the prep in the right
> sequence. Before the end of the semester they got it down, though.)
>

We have a few ....disagreements.... about timing meals here. We
occasionally have evening events that require that we be fed and cleaned
up in order to be somewhere at a certain time. Unfortunately, my wife
always used to consider " dinner time" as the time that dinner should
be started, not the time it should be served, and it doesn't help that
her prep work is disorganized and inefficient. Several nights a week I
was going out for a volunteer gig that started at 5 pm and i had to be
there early to groom and tack horses, which meant leaving the house by
4:15, not sitting down to eat at 4:30.

"Steve Pope" > wrote in message
...
> Julie Bove > wrote:
>
>>"Steve Pope" > wrote in message
>
>>> It's unreasonable to demand food before it's ready, but I do
>>> think it's reasonable to set a completion time and expect it
>>> to be done then. One might have other things in one's schedule
>>> after dinner. Also, in some cases, people need to eat at certain
>>> times with respect to their medication schedules. (This has
>>> often been true for me.)
>
>>> Of course, a "completion time" can be a range. (7 to 8:30 p.m.)
>>> If that's agreeable with folks.
>
>>That would not be agreeable to him. He wants to know the exact minute.
>
> That should usually be possible. And 15 minutes would be a reasonable
> window almost always.
>
>>That will never happen, given that I have a cat, a kid, a phone that rings
>>and all sort of other things that could crop up while I am cooking a meal.
>
> In my priority system, phone calls and most events involving cats
> should not be allowed to interrupt cooking in almost all cases.
> Things don't "crop up" while I'm cooking because I've decided to cook.
>
>>I don't do complicated meals. I just don't. He has no patience.
>
> Sounds to me like the reasonable flow is somewhere in between what
> he is demanding and what you are offering.
>
> (This topic resonates with me as I once was in the situation of taking
> night classes that started at 8:00 pm, meaning I had to leave the house
> at 7:05 and therefore wanted dinner prepared no later than 6:45.
> My partner for several weeks had a lot of trouble meeting this timing,
> usually for no real reason other than not doing the prep in the right
> sequence. Before the end of the semester they got it down, though.)

He doesn't currently live here. So when he is here, he is not going to work
or a class or anything. So there is nothing I have to do in regard to him
and getting him out the door.

OTOH, daughter has a dance class one day of the week and we have to be out
the door at a certain time. Because of this there are only a few meals I
will fix on this night. Only things that can be fixed and eaten quickly.

Cooking is not really a priority for me unless I am at a crucial stage of
the recipe. Since husband doesn't live here, he tends to call here while I
am cooking dinner. He knows what time I usually fix dinner so I feel he
knows full well what he is doing. So I will simply tell him I will call him
later. Now if it is another person calling, I will give them the benefit of
the doubt and I will stop what I am doing if I can and talk for a few
minutes. If I am doing something like deglazing a pan or reducing a sauce,
then I will tell them I will have to call them back later.

On Mon, 28 Feb 2011 01:13:13 -0800, "Julie Bove"
> wrote:

> He has no patience.

- and yet he won't lift a finger for himself. He will never truly
appreciate how much time and effort you put in until he has to be
responsible for feeding the family nutritious meals... and I'm not
talking about an occasional meal here or there. I mean really
responsible for every meal every week.

Of course, you can take a different course of action and cook just for
you and your DD (she can make meals for the family too, so take turns
with her) and let him fend for himself. If he wants peanut butter
now, then fine - eat it... but he has to make it too.

--

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

sf > wrote:

>On Mon, 28 Feb 2011 01:13:13 -0800, "Julie Bove"

> wrote:

>> He has no patience.

>- and yet he won't lift a finger for himself.

Where actually did Julie say this?

(It's possible, but I don't recall this being described.)



Steve

"sf" > wrote in message
news
> On Mon, 28 Feb 2011 01:13:13 -0800, "Julie Bove"
> > wrote:
>
>> He has no patience.
>
> - and yet he won't lift a finger for himself. He will never truly
> appreciate how much time and effort you put in until he has to be
> responsible for feeding the family nutritious meals... and I'm not
> talking about an occasional meal here or there. I mean really
> responsible for every meal every week.
>
> Of course, you can take a different course of action and cook just for
> you and your DD (she can make meals for the family too, so take turns
> with her) and let him fend for himself. If he wants peanut butter
> now, then fine - eat it... but he has to make it too.

Exactly.

On Mon, 28 Feb 2011 12:36:52 -0600, Omelet >
wrote:

> I get ideas based on what I have on hand...

I know! It's kind of fun to eat down the refrigerator and clear out
the freezer that way. I don't consider myself a creative cook, but
for some reason I can go 4-5 days easily doing it that way.

--

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.