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9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Hi,
My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age. Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants. The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the question. On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food, mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise. That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf submerged in ranch dressing, etc). We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation ideas, etc..? I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not. Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste for them. |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
H wrote:
> Hi, > > My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been > an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a > lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age. > > Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of > dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants. > > The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most > innocuous foods (snip) NO, the problem IS: > On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food, > mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise. My parents never cooked special meals for us kids. We either ate what they served or we didn't eat. Period. I think perhaps the cold turkey method would be the best thing. Her parents obviously cater to her fussiness and spoil her terribly with fast food and other crap which is not good for her. She *will* be obese if she keeps that up. I was a picky eater. Perhaps what you should do is what my parents did. They prepared what they liked and told me it was for "adults" so I wasn't ready to eat it. Of course, that made me want to eat it. So at age 9 I was gleefully eating steamed artichokes and running out to tell my friends about this "new food". Ditto asparagus, caulflower, broccoli, spinach. All sorts of fish and shellfish. By the time we got to Bangkok (I was still 9 when we got there) I was ready to try all sorts of things :) Good luck! Jill |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
H wrote:
> Hi, > > My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been > an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a > lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age. > > Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of > dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants. > > The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most > innocuous foods (snip) NO, the problem IS: > On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food, > mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise. My parents never cooked special meals for us kids. We either ate what they served or we didn't eat. Period. I think perhaps the cold turkey method would be the best thing. Her parents obviously cater to her fussiness and spoil her terribly with fast food and other crap which is not good for her. She *will* be obese if she keeps that up. I was a picky eater. Perhaps what you should do is what my parents did. They prepared what they liked and told me it was for "adults" so I wasn't ready to eat it. Of course, that made me want to eat it. So at age 9 I was gleefully eating steamed artichokes and running out to tell my friends about this "new food". Ditto asparagus, caulflower, broccoli, spinach. All sorts of fish and shellfish. By the time we got to Bangkok (I was still 9 when we got there) I was ready to try all sorts of things :) Good luck! Jill |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
H wrote:
> Hi, > > My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been > an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a > lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age. > > Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of > dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants. > > The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most > innocuous foods (snip) NO, the problem IS: > On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food, > mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise. My parents never cooked special meals for us kids. We either ate what they served or we didn't eat. Period. I think perhaps the cold turkey method would be the best thing. Her parents obviously cater to her fussiness and spoil her terribly with fast food and other crap which is not good for her. She *will* be obese if she keeps that up. I was a picky eater. Perhaps what you should do is what my parents did. They prepared what they liked and told me it was for "adults" so I wasn't ready to eat it. Of course, that made me want to eat it. So at age 9 I was gleefully eating steamed artichokes and running out to tell my friends about this "new food". Ditto asparagus, caulflower, broccoli, spinach. All sorts of fish and shellfish. By the time we got to Bangkok (I was still 9 when we got there) I was ready to try all sorts of things :) Good luck! Jill |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
"H" > wrote in message m... > Hi, > > My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been > an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a > lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age. > > Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of > dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants. > > The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most > innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will > cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and > stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are > eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the > question. > > On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food, > mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise. > > That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that > I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters > her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to > avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from > alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings > for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf > submerged in ranch dressing, etc). > > We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try > to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation > ideas, etc..? > > I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she > visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not. > Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she > will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste > for them. This is a difficult problem and there is no easy solution. Obviously you have control over what comes into the house don't buy any frozen nuggets and don't offer to take the child to Mickey Dee's daily. You are not the child's parent nor have you been charged with modifying her behavior. Have you? Finally, have you discussed this with your sister/brother? Dimitri |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
"H" > wrote in message m... > Hi, > > My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been > an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a > lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age. > > Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of > dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants. > > The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most > innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will > cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and > stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are > eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the > question. > > On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food, > mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise. > > That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that > I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters > her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to > avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from > alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings > for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf > submerged in ranch dressing, etc). > > We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try > to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation > ideas, etc..? > > I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she > visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not. > Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she > will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste > for them. This is a difficult problem and there is no easy solution. Obviously you have control over what comes into the house don't buy any frozen nuggets and don't offer to take the child to Mickey Dee's daily. You are not the child's parent nor have you been charged with modifying her behavior. Have you? Finally, have you discussed this with your sister/brother? Dimitri |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
"H" > wrote in message m... > Hi, > > My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been > an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a > lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age. > > Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of > dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants. > > The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most > innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will > cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and > stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are > eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the > question. > > On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food, > mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise. > > That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that > I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters > her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to > avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from > alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings > for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf > submerged in ranch dressing, etc). > > We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try > to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation > ideas, etc..? > > I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she > visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not. > Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she > will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste > for them. This is a difficult problem and there is no easy solution. Obviously you have control over what comes into the house don't buy any frozen nuggets and don't offer to take the child to Mickey Dee's daily. You are not the child's parent nor have you been charged with modifying her behavior. Have you? Finally, have you discussed this with your sister/brother? Dimitri |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Dimitri wrote:
<snip> > > This is a difficult problem and there is no easy solution. > > Obviously you have control over what comes into the house don't buy any > frozen nuggets and don't offer to take the child to Mickey Dee's daily. > > You are not the child's parent nor have you been charged with modifying her > behavior. Have you? > > Finally, have you discussed this with your sister/brother? > > Dimitri > > Agreed. If they try to alter the childs behavior (as badly as it obviously needs it) they're gonna end up being the "bad guys" in the follow on family "mess" that's bound to come of it. Personally, I'd just say "that's what's for dinner." (unless it's something really bizarre that obviously a kid would probably not want, such as tripe, etc) -- Steve Everyone has a photographic memory. Some folks just don't have any film. |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most > innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will > cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and > stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are > eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the > question. So that's how she gets attention. > I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she > visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not. > Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she > will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste > for them. No kid will starve his/herself by choice. I don't know long "a few weeks" is, but I'd go the cold turkey route. Simply don't offer anything that you don't normally eat. Period. Don't make an issue of it, don't argue, don't plead, don't pay attention to "loud protests". Present the food, let her take as much or as little as she wishes, and at the end of the meal, take it away. Don't offer snacks or allow big portions of desert to make up for a small dinner. It's your house, your rules, your food. Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns. Don't prepare special foods for her. I'd say after two or three days, hunger will take over and she will eat. What the heck, she might like it. --Kamus |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most > innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will > cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and > stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are > eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the > question. So that's how she gets attention. > I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she > visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not. > Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she > will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste > for them. No kid will starve his/herself by choice. I don't know long "a few weeks" is, but I'd go the cold turkey route. Simply don't offer anything that you don't normally eat. Period. Don't make an issue of it, don't argue, don't plead, don't pay attention to "loud protests". Present the food, let her take as much or as little as she wishes, and at the end of the meal, take it away. Don't offer snacks or allow big portions of desert to make up for a small dinner. It's your house, your rules, your food. Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns. Don't prepare special foods for her. I'd say after two or three days, hunger will take over and she will eat. What the heck, she might like it. --Kamus |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
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9 year old won't eat healthy foods
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9 year old won't eat healthy foods
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9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in
om: > On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote: > It's your house, your rules, your food. > Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns. > Don't prepare special foods for her. Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks but no thanks." OTOH, it may be that the rule worked a little too well. Thirty-plus years later and I find I eat anything and everything that's put in front of me. :-) -- REnglund Bullwinkle: You sure that's the only way? Rocky: Well, if you're going to be a hero, you've got to do stupid things every once in a while. |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in
om: > On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote: > It's your house, your rules, your food. > Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns. > Don't prepare special foods for her. Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks but no thanks." OTOH, it may be that the rule worked a little too well. Thirty-plus years later and I find I eat anything and everything that's put in front of me. :-) -- REnglund Bullwinkle: You sure that's the only way? Rocky: Well, if you're going to be a hero, you've got to do stupid things every once in a while. |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in
om: > On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote: > It's your house, your rules, your food. > Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns. > Don't prepare special foods for her. Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks but no thanks." OTOH, it may be that the rule worked a little too well. Thirty-plus years later and I find I eat anything and everything that's put in front of me. :-) -- REnglund Bullwinkle: You sure that's the only way? Rocky: Well, if you're going to be a hero, you've got to do stupid things every once in a while. |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
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9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Robt Englund wrote:
> > Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in > om: > > > On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote: > > It's your house, your rules, your food. > > > Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns. > > Don't prepare special foods for her. > > Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the > table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you > had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule > and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks > but no thanks." I was about to say 'when I was 9' then I realized that *all* these years later, nothing has changed. I go to my mother's house, or anyone else's for that matter, you eat what was put on the table. My only complaint is that my mother insisted to the point of loooong lonely stressful dinners that I eat everything. Even liver. I'm a much pickier eater now than I was as a kid, there was no reason to force me to eat the two things I hated. Just put dinner on the table. Since when do kids get to order what they want. Ignore it. Who is doing this girl a favor by catering to her whims? nancy (we didn't even *have* mcdonalds or mcnuggets when I was a kid, no lie) |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Robt Englund wrote:
> > Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in > om: > > > On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote: > > It's your house, your rules, your food. > > > Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns. > > Don't prepare special foods for her. > > Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the > table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you > had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule > and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks > but no thanks." I was about to say 'when I was 9' then I realized that *all* these years later, nothing has changed. I go to my mother's house, or anyone else's for that matter, you eat what was put on the table. My only complaint is that my mother insisted to the point of loooong lonely stressful dinners that I eat everything. Even liver. I'm a much pickier eater now than I was as a kid, there was no reason to force me to eat the two things I hated. Just put dinner on the table. Since when do kids get to order what they want. Ignore it. Who is doing this girl a favor by catering to her whims? nancy (we didn't even *have* mcdonalds or mcnuggets when I was a kid, no lie) |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
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9 year old won't eat healthy foods
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9 year old won't eat healthy foods
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9 year old won't eat healthy foods
"Curly Sue" > wrote in message ... > It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to > have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this > summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short > period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your > relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many > years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's > playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my > house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know > how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only > requirement is that they take leftovers with them :> My kids only had sugary cereal when they visited their grandparents, so they always looked forward to those visits. At home they didn't even get sugar on plain cereal. I wasn't thrilled the day Mom put honey on my daughter's bread and peanut butter. When she said "but that's what you ate" I reminded her that our childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added, something not seen with Kraft or Skippy. But Grammy was also of the school of "eat all that's on your plate so that you can have dessert" (her sons and husband were overweight -- coincidence?). Our kids weren't used to 'dessert' which at home was generally fruit and part of the meal. Cake & such was so rare in our home that when we took a 3 day train trip and the middle child got carrot cake for dessert he asked whose birthday we were celebrating. ;o) Gabby |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
"Curly Sue" > wrote in message ... > It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to > have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this > summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short > period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your > relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many > years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's > playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my > house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know > how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only > requirement is that they take leftovers with them :> My kids only had sugary cereal when they visited their grandparents, so they always looked forward to those visits. At home they didn't even get sugar on plain cereal. I wasn't thrilled the day Mom put honey on my daughter's bread and peanut butter. When she said "but that's what you ate" I reminded her that our childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added, something not seen with Kraft or Skippy. But Grammy was also of the school of "eat all that's on your plate so that you can have dessert" (her sons and husband were overweight -- coincidence?). Our kids weren't used to 'dessert' which at home was generally fruit and part of the meal. Cake & such was so rare in our home that when we took a 3 day train trip and the middle child got carrot cake for dessert he asked whose birthday we were celebrating. ;o) Gabby |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
"Curly Sue" > wrote in message ... > It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to > have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this > summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short > period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your > relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many > years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's > playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my > house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know > how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only > requirement is that they take leftovers with them :> My kids only had sugary cereal when they visited their grandparents, so they always looked forward to those visits. At home they didn't even get sugar on plain cereal. I wasn't thrilled the day Mom put honey on my daughter's bread and peanut butter. When she said "but that's what you ate" I reminded her that our childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added, something not seen with Kraft or Skippy. But Grammy was also of the school of "eat all that's on your plate so that you can have dessert" (her sons and husband were overweight -- coincidence?). Our kids weren't used to 'dessert' which at home was generally fruit and part of the meal. Cake & such was so rare in our home that when we took a 3 day train trip and the middle child got carrot cake for dessert he asked whose birthday we were celebrating. ;o) Gabby |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
H wrote:
> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she > visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not. > Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she > will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste > for them. I think this is the answer. Make sure you don't do it as a punishment. Merely start cooking good nourishing meals and not buying anything else. Here's an old post that I wrote the last time the subject came up: For the most part, though, I prefer the opposite approach. I was picky like your children and remember the food wars of my childhood. When I said I didn't like a food, my parents argued logic with me and did a lot of talking about how I didn't know I didn't like it until I tried it. All I heard was that they wanted me to swallow something unknown and yucky. I didn't know where my disgust came from, but it was extreme. It put me in a lot of embarrassing situations that continued until I was in my 20s. Eating with other people was a source of anxiety as others paid all this attention to what I was eating when I just wanted them to leave me alone. Here's what I wish my parents had done. Spend no family grocery money on junk. None. No chips or candy or ice cream or sugary breakfast cereals in the house at all. Do have flour and sugar so you can make homemade baked goods on occasion with the kids. Prepare healthful nutritious meals consisting of meats, poultry, fish, grains, beans, milk, cheese, vegetables, fruit and juice. Serve a variety at each meal. Don't insist that they eat anything they're reluctant to eat. If your children eat the lasagne and skip the salad, they won't go hungry. If they skip both the salad and the lasagne, they can still eat the French bread and won't starve. If they get some junk when out or at friends' homes, don't worry about it. It isn't like they're living on it. Take the emotion out of eating. Do insist that your children have the good manners to say no thank-you when refusing food. Then forget that they've refused it and offer the same food again at some later date when you feel like serving it. If they ask, explain that it is normal for people's tastes to change as they grow older. They don't play with the same toys or like the same books as they did a few years ago. Some tastes change; some tastes stay the same. It is the same with food. Some foods they'll always like. Some foods they might not like now and want to try later. If you set it up like a battle, you force them to make a big scene and complain and make gagging noises. How can they be expected to change their minds after all that? You don't leave them a graceful way out. Don't turn being picky into your children's identifying characteristic. Pay it as little attention as possible. I knew a man who introduced his middle daughter as the one who won't eat fruits or vegetables. He thought it was amusing and thought he was being kind because he didn't force her. I looked at it from her point of view and thought: This is the one thing that sets her apart from her older and younger sisters. How's she ever going to change when she has nothing else? She's not the artistic one or the one who's good at math or the one with the sense of humor. No, she's the one who doesn't eat. When you're 10, distinguishing characteristics are important. This isn't conscious, but it is defining nonetheless. As for actual cooking (that was your original question way back when), I recommend NOT hiding the vegetables but make them as plain as possible. I know that I wouldn't want to try some mystery food but might be willing to try something if I knew exactly what it was. Being cautious and making decisions based on information is actually a good policy in life. You should applaud it in your children. (Imagine a drug dealer explaining that he won't tell your children what something is but he wants them to try it anyway. Wouldn't you want them to get all the information they could before taking the plunge? The same is true for taking a job, traveling to a new country, entering a sexual or romantic relationship. Be cautious; get information; THEN try something new.) Serve vegetables relatively plain. Involve the kids in learning to cook. If they're willing to eat something only if it has ketchup or salad dressing on it, put the ketchup or salad dressing on the table. Give each child one night a week when they're in charge of choosing the menu and learning to prepare it. Explain that they must cook a balanced meal even if they don't choose to eat it. One child might choose burgers, baked potaotes and carrot sticks. Take the kid to the grocery store and show him how to look at the label on the package of hamburger, figure out how much is needed for the family and so on. That night the child prepares dinner with you, sets the table and helps clean up. All this is age appropriate so a younger child might only have to watch, and an older child might be serving the whole dinner. Make food preparation, clean-up, and choice of what to eat go together in a package (just like real life). If you do find a vegetable that the kids like or object to less strenuously than others (carrot sticks, corn on the cob, cole slaw), serve it fairly often. It won't hurt any of you to eat corn on the cob 3 times a week (when it is so inexpensive and in season). If there's something you like, let it show up fairly often too. All this will serve to demystify vegetables. When they're familiar, they won't be so scary. And now, a question: What are the vegetables that you and your spouse love to eat and eat all the time that your children won't touch? Would you list them? How do you prepare them? I used to work with in health food. People were always asking me about how to get the kids to eat vegetables, and I'd always ask what the adults like to eat. Your answer to that question will help me learn what to suggest. --Lia |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
H wrote:
> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she > visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not. > Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she > will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste > for them. I think this is the answer. Make sure you don't do it as a punishment. Merely start cooking good nourishing meals and not buying anything else. Here's an old post that I wrote the last time the subject came up: For the most part, though, I prefer the opposite approach. I was picky like your children and remember the food wars of my childhood. When I said I didn't like a food, my parents argued logic with me and did a lot of talking about how I didn't know I didn't like it until I tried it. All I heard was that they wanted me to swallow something unknown and yucky. I didn't know where my disgust came from, but it was extreme. It put me in a lot of embarrassing situations that continued until I was in my 20s. Eating with other people was a source of anxiety as others paid all this attention to what I was eating when I just wanted them to leave me alone. Here's what I wish my parents had done. Spend no family grocery money on junk. None. No chips or candy or ice cream or sugary breakfast cereals in the house at all. Do have flour and sugar so you can make homemade baked goods on occasion with the kids. Prepare healthful nutritious meals consisting of meats, poultry, fish, grains, beans, milk, cheese, vegetables, fruit and juice. Serve a variety at each meal. Don't insist that they eat anything they're reluctant to eat. If your children eat the lasagne and skip the salad, they won't go hungry. If they skip both the salad and the lasagne, they can still eat the French bread and won't starve. If they get some junk when out or at friends' homes, don't worry about it. It isn't like they're living on it. Take the emotion out of eating. Do insist that your children have the good manners to say no thank-you when refusing food. Then forget that they've refused it and offer the same food again at some later date when you feel like serving it. If they ask, explain that it is normal for people's tastes to change as they grow older. They don't play with the same toys or like the same books as they did a few years ago. Some tastes change; some tastes stay the same. It is the same with food. Some foods they'll always like. Some foods they might not like now and want to try later. If you set it up like a battle, you force them to make a big scene and complain and make gagging noises. How can they be expected to change their minds after all that? You don't leave them a graceful way out. Don't turn being picky into your children's identifying characteristic. Pay it as little attention as possible. I knew a man who introduced his middle daughter as the one who won't eat fruits or vegetables. He thought it was amusing and thought he was being kind because he didn't force her. I looked at it from her point of view and thought: This is the one thing that sets her apart from her older and younger sisters. How's she ever going to change when she has nothing else? She's not the artistic one or the one who's good at math or the one with the sense of humor. No, she's the one who doesn't eat. When you're 10, distinguishing characteristics are important. This isn't conscious, but it is defining nonetheless. As for actual cooking (that was your original question way back when), I recommend NOT hiding the vegetables but make them as plain as possible. I know that I wouldn't want to try some mystery food but might be willing to try something if I knew exactly what it was. Being cautious and making decisions based on information is actually a good policy in life. You should applaud it in your children. (Imagine a drug dealer explaining that he won't tell your children what something is but he wants them to try it anyway. Wouldn't you want them to get all the information they could before taking the plunge? The same is true for taking a job, traveling to a new country, entering a sexual or romantic relationship. Be cautious; get information; THEN try something new.) Serve vegetables relatively plain. Involve the kids in learning to cook. If they're willing to eat something only if it has ketchup or salad dressing on it, put the ketchup or salad dressing on the table. Give each child one night a week when they're in charge of choosing the menu and learning to prepare it. Explain that they must cook a balanced meal even if they don't choose to eat it. One child might choose burgers, baked potaotes and carrot sticks. Take the kid to the grocery store and show him how to look at the label on the package of hamburger, figure out how much is needed for the family and so on. That night the child prepares dinner with you, sets the table and helps clean up. All this is age appropriate so a younger child might only have to watch, and an older child might be serving the whole dinner. Make food preparation, clean-up, and choice of what to eat go together in a package (just like real life). If you do find a vegetable that the kids like or object to less strenuously than others (carrot sticks, corn on the cob, cole slaw), serve it fairly often. It won't hurt any of you to eat corn on the cob 3 times a week (when it is so inexpensive and in season). If there's something you like, let it show up fairly often too. All this will serve to demystify vegetables. When they're familiar, they won't be so scary. And now, a question: What are the vegetables that you and your spouse love to eat and eat all the time that your children won't touch? Would you list them? How do you prepare them? I used to work with in health food. People were always asking me about how to get the kids to eat vegetables, and I'd always ask what the adults like to eat. Your answer to that question will help me learn what to suggest. --Lia |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
> have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this > summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short > period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your > relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many > years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's > playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my > house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know > how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only > requirement is that they take leftovers with them :> Another example of letting children run the show. Not at our house. "This is what's for supper. Take it or leave it." I can quite assure you that we're not having tripe and liver for dinner, either. |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
> have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this > summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short > period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your > relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many > years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's > playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my > house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know > how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only > requirement is that they take leftovers with them :> Another example of letting children run the show. Not at our house. "This is what's for supper. Take it or leave it." I can quite assure you that we're not having tripe and liver for dinner, either. |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Kamus of Kadizhar wrote:
> No kid will starve his/herself by choice. I agree with everything else in your post but wanted to pull this out of context and jump on it. Children as young as 9 can have anorexia. That's obviously not the case with the original poster's niece. I just wanted to clear up this inaccuracy. --Lia |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
Kamus of Kadizhar wrote:
> No kid will starve his/herself by choice. I agree with everything else in your post but wanted to pull this out of context and jump on it. Children as young as 9 can have anorexia. That's obviously not the case with the original poster's niece. I just wanted to clear up this inaccuracy. --Lia |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 22:39:53 GMT, "Marie in ME" >
wrote: >"Curly Sue" > wrote in message ... >> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many >> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's >> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my >> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know >> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only >> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :> > >Another example of letting children run the show. Not at our house. "This is >what's for supper. Take it or leave it." I can quite assure you that we're >not having tripe and liver for dinner, either. I have a different philosophy for guests. I ask what they want for breakfast, eg. my mother and sister have English muffins, which I never do. So I buy them when they visit. My mother drinks coffee, which I don't, so I buy instant coffee for her and make sure I have sugar substitute. My sister takes fat-free half-and-half, I buy that for her. I alter my menus and routines for adults so they will have an enjoyable visit. I see no reason to treat someone else's children differently than my other guests just because they're shorter ;> I'm not rearing them, I'm hosting them. So yes, my guests of all ages run the show! Sue(tm) Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself! |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 22:39:53 GMT, "Marie in ME" >
wrote: >"Curly Sue" > wrote in message ... >> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many >> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's >> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my >> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know >> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only >> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :> > >Another example of letting children run the show. Not at our house. "This is >what's for supper. Take it or leave it." I can quite assure you that we're >not having tripe and liver for dinner, either. I have a different philosophy for guests. I ask what they want for breakfast, eg. my mother and sister have English muffins, which I never do. So I buy them when they visit. My mother drinks coffee, which I don't, so I buy instant coffee for her and make sure I have sugar substitute. My sister takes fat-free half-and-half, I buy that for her. I alter my menus and routines for adults so they will have an enjoyable visit. I see no reason to treat someone else's children differently than my other guests just because they're shorter ;> I'm not rearing them, I'm hosting them. So yes, my guests of all ages run the show! Sue(tm) Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself! |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
In article >, Michel Boucher
> wrote: > There's a story by Russell Hoban along those lines called Bread and > Jam for Frances, where the central character expresses a desire to > eat only bread and jam for the rest of her life. Her mother takes > her up on it and eventually she gets sick of bread and jam and starts > to eat normal foods. I loved this book when I was a kid. I'll have to see if the library has it and read it to our kids. Regards, Ranee -- Remove do not and spam to e-mail me. "The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in shrines made by man." Acts 17:24 |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
In article >, Michel Boucher
> wrote: > There's a story by Russell Hoban along those lines called Bread and > Jam for Frances, where the central character expresses a desire to > eat only bread and jam for the rest of her life. Her mother takes > her up on it and eventually she gets sick of bread and jam and starts > to eat normal foods. I loved this book when I was a kid. I'll have to see if the library has it and read it to our kids. Regards, Ranee -- Remove do not and spam to e-mail me. "The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in shrines made by man." Acts 17:24 |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
In article >, Michel Boucher
> wrote: > There's a story by Russell Hoban along those lines called Bread and > Jam for Frances, where the central character expresses a desire to > eat only bread and jam for the rest of her life. Her mother takes > her up on it and eventually she gets sick of bread and jam and starts > to eat normal foods. I loved this book when I was a kid. I'll have to see if the library has it and read it to our kids. Regards, Ranee -- Remove do not and spam to e-mail me. "The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in shrines made by man." Acts 17:24 |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
"Gabby" > wrote <snip> I reminded her that our > childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added, something > not seen with Kraft or Skippy. Then I recommend Adam's Peanut Butter! Good stuff. Ingredients: peanuts & 1% or less salt. I love a peanut butter and honey sandwich once in a while. I get the honey from the local market. Mmm. -- -Andrea |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
"Gabby" > wrote <snip> I reminded her that our > childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added, something > not seen with Kraft or Skippy. Then I recommend Adam's Peanut Butter! Good stuff. Ingredients: peanuts & 1% or less salt. I love a peanut butter and honey sandwich once in a while. I get the honey from the local market. Mmm. -- -Andrea |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
H wrote:
> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try > to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, preparation > ideas, etc..? For vegetables, try corn on the cob, baked sweet potatoes, carrot sticks, celery sticks, cole slaw in a little mayonnaise. Don't ask me why, but kids are more likely to go for those than broccoli, mushrooms, zucchini or peppers. Also, kids are more likely to try broccoli and zucchini raw than cooked. If she'll eat plain raw iceberg lettuce, see if she'll eat romaine. Avoid mixed foods. Plain and raw is more likely to be appealing than something with a mushroom in it that needs to picked around or something with diced up red pepper or parsley in it. Adults see it and think it looks pretty. Kids just see something floating in their food. You might try substituting whole grain breads, especially whole grain bagels, for white bread. Also substitute brown rice for white. Plain also works with meats. Try plain broiled lamb chops, pork chops, steaks, chicken pieces. I know I love stews and sauces, but when children are being picky (and I was a picky kid), they're less suspicious of one food than something with a variety of ingredients. For some reason, kids usually don't mind tomato sauce. There are a whole lot of foods you can smother in tomato sauce. Offer it to her on the side and give her the option of dipping in the sauce. You can take advantage of her penchant for mayonnaise the same way. Give her a crudite tray with carrots, etc. on it with a little mayonnaise in a shot glass on the side. Show her how she can use the mayonnaise as a dip. I'd stop periodically giving in to her cravings. She's only learning to hold out longer. If she doesn't eat long enough, she eventually gets what she wants. Imagine if she were whining that she wanted wanted a particular expensive toy, and the first time you gave in after she nagged for it once; the second time you gave in after she nagged 3 times. Later she had to nag 10 times, but you always eventually gave in. All you'd be teaching her would be to become an obnoxious, whining, nagging kid. That's not doing her any favors. Thus with food. Starting today, stop giving in with the chicken nuggets. Stop caring about what she eats at all. Just put nourishing food on the table, maybe the corn on the cob or the sweet potatoes mentioned above. Pay her no attention when she complains and whines for something else. Answer her whines with "this is what we're having for dinner." Repeat as necessary. --Lia |
9 year old won't eat healthy foods
H wrote:
> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try > to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, preparation > ideas, etc..? For vegetables, try corn on the cob, baked sweet potatoes, carrot sticks, celery sticks, cole slaw in a little mayonnaise. Don't ask me why, but kids are more likely to go for those than broccoli, mushrooms, zucchini or peppers. Also, kids are more likely to try broccoli and zucchini raw than cooked. If she'll eat plain raw iceberg lettuce, see if she'll eat romaine. Avoid mixed foods. Plain and raw is more likely to be appealing than something with a mushroom in it that needs to picked around or something with diced up red pepper or parsley in it. Adults see it and think it looks pretty. Kids just see something floating in their food. You might try substituting whole grain breads, especially whole grain bagels, for white bread. Also substitute brown rice for white. Plain also works with meats. Try plain broiled lamb chops, pork chops, steaks, chicken pieces. I know I love stews and sauces, but when children are being picky (and I was a picky kid), they're less suspicious of one food than something with a variety of ingredients. For some reason, kids usually don't mind tomato sauce. There are a whole lot of foods you can smother in tomato sauce. Offer it to her on the side and give her the option of dipping in the sauce. You can take advantage of her penchant for mayonnaise the same way. Give her a crudite tray with carrots, etc. on it with a little mayonnaise in a shot glass on the side. Show her how she can use the mayonnaise as a dip. I'd stop periodically giving in to her cravings. She's only learning to hold out longer. If she doesn't eat long enough, she eventually gets what she wants. Imagine if she were whining that she wanted wanted a particular expensive toy, and the first time you gave in after she nagged for it once; the second time you gave in after she nagged 3 times. Later she had to nag 10 times, but you always eventually gave in. All you'd be teaching her would be to become an obnoxious, whining, nagging kid. That's not doing her any favors. Thus with food. Starting today, stop giving in with the chicken nuggets. Stop caring about what she eats at all. Just put nourishing food on the table, maybe the corn on the cob or the sweet potatoes mentioned above. Pay her no attention when she complains and whines for something else. Answer her whines with "this is what we're having for dinner." Repeat as necessary. --Lia |
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