Hi,

My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.

Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.

The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
question.

On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.

That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that
I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters
her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to
avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from
alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings
for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf
submerged in ranch dressing, etc).

We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
ideas, etc..?

I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
for them.

H wrote:
> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods (snip)

NO, the problem IS:
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.

My parents never cooked special meals for us kids. We either ate what they
served or we didn't eat. Period. I think perhaps the cold turkey method
would be the best thing. Her parents obviously cater to her fussiness and
spoil her terribly with fast food and other crap which is not good for her.
She *will* be obese if she keeps that up.

I was a picky eater. Perhaps what you should do is what my parents did.
They prepared what they liked and told me it was for "adults" so I wasn't
ready to eat it. Of course, that made me want to eat it. So at age 9 I was
gleefully eating steamed artichokes and running out to tell my friends about
this "new food". Ditto asparagus, caulflower, broccoli, spinach. All sorts
of fish and shellfish. By the time we got to Bangkok (I was still 9 when we
got there) I was ready to try all sorts of things

Good luck!

Jill

H wrote:
> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods (snip)

NO, the problem IS:
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.

My parents never cooked special meals for us kids. We either ate what they
served or we didn't eat. Period. I think perhaps the cold turkey method
would be the best thing. Her parents obviously cater to her fussiness and
spoil her terribly with fast food and other crap which is not good for her.
She *will* be obese if she keeps that up.

I was a picky eater. Perhaps what you should do is what my parents did.
They prepared what they liked and told me it was for "adults" so I wasn't
ready to eat it. Of course, that made me want to eat it. So at age 9 I was
gleefully eating steamed artichokes and running out to tell my friends about
this "new food". Ditto asparagus, caulflower, broccoli, spinach. All sorts
of fish and shellfish. By the time we got to Bangkok (I was still 9 when we
got there) I was ready to try all sorts of things

Good luck!

Jill

H wrote:
> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods (snip)

NO, the problem IS:
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.

My parents never cooked special meals for us kids. We either ate what they
served or we didn't eat. Period. I think perhaps the cold turkey method
would be the best thing. Her parents obviously cater to her fussiness and
spoil her terribly with fast food and other crap which is not good for her.
She *will* be obese if she keeps that up.

I was a picky eater. Perhaps what you should do is what my parents did.
They prepared what they liked and told me it was for "adults" so I wasn't
ready to eat it. Of course, that made me want to eat it. So at age 9 I was
gleefully eating steamed artichokes and running out to tell my friends about
this "new food". Ditto asparagus, caulflower, broccoli, spinach. All sorts
of fish and shellfish. By the time we got to Bangkok (I was still 9 when we
got there) I was ready to try all sorts of things

Good luck!

Jill

"H" > wrote in message
m...
> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
> cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
> stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
> eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
> question.
>
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.
>
> That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that
> I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters
> her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to
> avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from
> alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings
> for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf
> submerged in ranch dressing, etc).
>
> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
> to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
> ideas, etc..?
>
> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.

This is a difficult problem and there is no easy solution.

Obviously you have control over what comes into the house don't buy any
frozen nuggets and don't offer to take the child to Mickey Dee's daily.

You are not the child's parent nor have you been charged with modifying her
behavior. Have you?

Finally, have you discussed this with your sister/brother?

Dimitri

"H" > wrote in message
m...
> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
> cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
> stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
> eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
> question.
>
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.
>
> That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that
> I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters
> her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to
> avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from
> alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings
> for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf
> submerged in ranch dressing, etc).
>
> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
> to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
> ideas, etc..?
>
> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.

This is a difficult problem and there is no easy solution.

Obviously you have control over what comes into the house don't buy any
frozen nuggets and don't offer to take the child to Mickey Dee's daily.

You are not the child's parent nor have you been charged with modifying her
behavior. Have you?

Finally, have you discussed this with your sister/brother?

Dimitri

"H" > wrote in message
m...
> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
> cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
> stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
> eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
> question.
>
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.
>
> That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that
> I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters
> her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to
> avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from
> alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings
> for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf
> submerged in ranch dressing, etc).
>
> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
> to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
> ideas, etc..?
>
> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.

This is a difficult problem and there is no easy solution.

Obviously you have control over what comes into the house don't buy any
frozen nuggets and don't offer to take the child to Mickey Dee's daily.

You are not the child's parent nor have you been charged with modifying her
behavior. Have you?

Finally, have you discussed this with your sister/brother?

Dimitri

Dimitri wrote:
<snip>
>
> This is a difficult problem and there is no easy solution.
>
> Obviously you have control over what comes into the house don't buy any
> frozen nuggets and don't offer to take the child to Mickey Dee's daily.
>
> You are not the child's parent nor have you been charged with modifying her
> behavior. Have you?
>
> Finally, have you discussed this with your sister/brother?
>
> Dimitri
>
>

Agreed. If they try to alter the childs behavior (as badly as it
obviously needs it) they're gonna end up being the "bad guys" in the
follow on family "mess" that's bound to come of it.

Personally, I'd just say "that's what's for dinner." (unless it's
something really bizarre that obviously a kid would probably not want,
such as tripe, etc)

--
Steve

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some folks just don't have any film.

On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:

> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
> cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
> stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
> eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
> question.

So that's how she gets attention.

> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.

No kid will starve his/herself by choice. I don't know long "a few weeks"
is, but I'd go the cold turkey route. Simply don't offer anything that
you don't normally eat. Period. Don't make an issue of it, don't argue,
don't plead, don't pay attention to "loud protests".

Present the food, let her take as much or as little as she wishes, and at
the end of the meal, take it away. Don't offer snacks or allow big
portions of desert to make up for a small dinner.

It's your house, your rules, your food.

Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns.
Don't prepare special foods for her.

I'd say after two or three days, hunger will take over and she will eat.
What the heck, she might like it.

--Kamus

On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:

> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
> cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
> stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
> eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
> question.

So that's how she gets attention.

> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.

No kid will starve his/herself by choice. I don't know long "a few weeks"
is, but I'd go the cold turkey route. Simply don't offer anything that
you don't normally eat. Period. Don't make an issue of it, don't argue,
don't plead, don't pay attention to "loud protests".

Present the food, let her take as much or as little as she wishes, and at
the end of the meal, take it away. Don't offer snacks or allow big
portions of desert to make up for a small dinner.

It's your house, your rules, your food.

Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns.
Don't prepare special foods for her.

I'd say after two or three days, hunger will take over and she will eat.
What the heck, she might like it.

--Kamus

In article > ,
(H) wrote:

> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
> cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
> stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
> eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
> question.
>
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.
>
> That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that
> I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters
> her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to
> avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from
> alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings
> for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf
> submerged in ranch dressing, etc).
>
> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
> to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
> ideas, etc..?
>
> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.

Some girls gain weight just before the onset of the puberty growth
spurt. That may be what's going on; then again, she may be getting into
the bad habits of her family. Is her activity level similar to previous
years?

You probably can't do much to change her habits once she leaves, but
while she's under your roof you can handle meals your way. Say things
like, "We do things differently here than at your home. This is OUR
regular food." Have her help prepare meals. Work from basic cookbooks
like Betty Crocker, Joy of Cooking, or Better Homes & Gardens. Any one
of these cookbooks will have recipes that won't be too weird for a
9-year-old. Take her along when you go to the grocery store or farmers'
markets. Encourage her to try the samples that are offered--provided
they're not chicken nuggets. Go berry-picking and make a fruit salad or
cobbler.

Good luck.
Cindy

--
C.J. Fuller

Delete the obvious to email me

In article > ,
(H) wrote:

> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
> cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
> stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
> eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
> question.
>
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.
>
> That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that
> I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters
> her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to
> avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from
> alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings
> for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf
> submerged in ranch dressing, etc).
>
> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
> to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
> ideas, etc..?
>
> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.

Some girls gain weight just before the onset of the puberty growth
spurt. That may be what's going on; then again, she may be getting into
the bad habits of her family. Is her activity level similar to previous
years?

You probably can't do much to change her habits once she leaves, but
while she's under your roof you can handle meals your way. Say things
like, "We do things differently here than at your home. This is OUR
regular food." Have her help prepare meals. Work from basic cookbooks
like Betty Crocker, Joy of Cooking, or Better Homes & Gardens. Any one
of these cookbooks will have recipes that won't be too weird for a
9-year-old. Take her along when you go to the grocery store or farmers'
markets. Encourage her to try the samples that are offered--provided
they're not chicken nuggets. Go berry-picking and make a fruit salad or
cobbler.

Good luck.
Cindy

--
C.J. Fuller

Delete the obvious to email me

In article > ,
(H) wrote:

> Hi,
>
> My 9 year-old niece is visiting us for the summer. She has always been
> an active and skinny kid, but this year I noticed that she gained a
> lot of weight-- not obese, but definately a big belly for her age.
>
> Anyways, we are into cooking and like to make a large variety of
> dishes, as well as go out to eat at interesting restaurants.
>
> The problem is that this girl is literally repulsed by even the most
> innocuous foods-- any amount of spice or even any new flavor will
> cause her to reject the food immediately and refuse loudly and
> stubbornly to eat the food again. Bland foods like steamed carrots are
> eaten in slow and counted nibbles. Ethnic foods are out of the
> question.
>
> On the other hand, she eats adult-size portions of junk food,
> mcdonalds, and heaps of mayonaise.
>
> That side of the family has a lot of obesity and now I am afraid that
> I am going to lose the active little girl I once knew as she enters
> her pre-teen years and becomes obese and unhealthy. We try hard to
> avoid making every meal a confrontation. In order to keep from
> alienating here completely, we do periodically give in to her cravings
> for what she calls "regular food" (chicken nuggets, one salad leaf
> submerged in ranch dressing, etc).
>
> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
> to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
> ideas, etc..?
>
> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.

Some girls gain weight just before the onset of the puberty growth
spurt. That may be what's going on; then again, she may be getting into
the bad habits of her family. Is her activity level similar to previous
years?

You probably can't do much to change her habits once she leaves, but
while she's under your roof you can handle meals your way. Say things
like, "We do things differently here than at your home. This is OUR
regular food." Have her help prepare meals. Work from basic cookbooks
like Betty Crocker, Joy of Cooking, or Better Homes & Gardens. Any one
of these cookbooks will have recipes that won't be too weird for a
9-year-old. Take her along when you go to the grocery store or farmers'
markets. Encourage her to try the samples that are offered--provided
they're not chicken nuggets. Go berry-picking and make a fruit salad or
cobbler.

Good luck.
Cindy

--
C.J. Fuller

Delete the obvious to email me

Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in
news
> On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:
> It's your house, your rules, your food.

> Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns.
> Don't prepare special foods for her.

Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the
table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you
had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule
and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks
but no thanks."

OTOH, it may be that the rule worked a little too well. Thirty-plus years
later and I find I eat anything and everything that's put in front of me.
:-)

--
REnglund

Bullwinkle: You sure that's the only way?
Rocky: Well, if you're going to be a hero, you've
got to do stupid things every once in a while.

Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in
news
> On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:
> It's your house, your rules, your food.

> Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns.
> Don't prepare special foods for her.

Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the
table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you
had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule
and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks
but no thanks."

OTOH, it may be that the rule worked a little too well. Thirty-plus years
later and I find I eat anything and everything that's put in front of me.
:-)

--
REnglund

Bullwinkle: You sure that's the only way?
Rocky: Well, if you're going to be a hero, you've
got to do stupid things every once in a while.

Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in
news
> On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:
> It's your house, your rules, your food.

> Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns.
> Don't prepare special foods for her.

Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the
table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you
had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule
and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks
but no thanks."

OTOH, it may be that the rule worked a little too well. Thirty-plus years
later and I find I eat anything and everything that's put in front of me.
:-)

--
REnglund

Bullwinkle: You sure that's the only way?
Rocky: Well, if you're going to be a hero, you've
got to do stupid things every once in a while.

(H) wrote in
m:

> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or
> not. Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of
> her and she will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps
> develop a taste for them.

That was my plan for my wife's granddaughter, but I was always told
that she couldn't go hungry. Hell, the kid fussed at plain white
rice.

Anyway, now I make hot dogs when she complains about the food.
Eventually, I hope, she will have enough of hot dogs and start eating
other things. There's a story by Russell Hoban along those lines
called Bread and Jam for Frances, where the central character
expresses a desire to eat only bread and jam for the rest of her
life. Her mother takes her up on it and eventually she gets sick of
bread and jam and starts to eat normal foods.

--

Please note that this post contains no overt anti-USAian statements
of any sort, nor is it designed to excite the political passions of
the morally bankrupt right-wing supporters of the emerging fascist
states...unfortunately :-)

Robt Englund wrote:
>
> Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in
> news >
> > On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:
> > It's your house, your rules, your food.
>
> > Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns.
> > Don't prepare special foods for her.
>
> Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the
> table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you
> had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule
> and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks
> but no thanks."

I was about to say 'when I was 9' then I realized that *all* these
years later, nothing has changed. I go to my mother's house, or
anyone else's for that matter, you eat what was put on the table.
My only complaint is that my mother insisted to the point of loooong
lonely stressful dinners that I eat everything. Even liver.

I'm a much pickier eater now than I was as a kid, there was no reason
to force me to eat the two things I hated.

Just put dinner on the table. Since when do kids get to order what
they want. Ignore it. Who is doing this girl a favor by catering to
her whims?

nancy (we didn't even *have* mcdonalds or mcnuggets when I was a kid,
no lie)

Robt Englund wrote:
>
> Kamus of Kadizhar > wrote in
> news >
> > On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, H wrote:
> > It's your house, your rules, your food.
>
> > Any arguing or pleading simply reinforces the (bad) behavior patterns.
> > Don't prepare special foods for her.
>
> Agreed. My grandmother had only one rule in her house: whatever was on the
> table, you had to at least try it. You didn't have to eat it all, but you
> had to try it. She didn't make a big deal of it - it was simply the rule
> and was understood by all, adults and children alike. No one said, "Thanks
> but no thanks."

I was about to say 'when I was 9' then I realized that *all* these
years later, nothing has changed. I go to my mother's house, or
anyone else's for that matter, you eat what was put on the table.
My only complaint is that my mother insisted to the point of loooong
lonely stressful dinners that I eat everything. Even liver.

I'm a much pickier eater now than I was as a kid, there was no reason
to force me to eat the two things I hated.

Just put dinner on the table. Since when do kids get to order what
they want. Ignore it. Who is doing this girl a favor by catering to
her whims?

nancy (we didn't even *have* mcdonalds or mcnuggets when I was a kid,
no lie)

On 2 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, (H) wrote:

>We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
>to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
>ideas, etc..?

>I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
>visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
>Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
>will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
>for them.

It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this
summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short
period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your
relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>

That doesn't mean you totally give up. You can make your own
(healthier) chicken nuggets, for example. Find out what vegetables
she does like (corn? green beans? raw carrots?). My nieces and
nephews wouldn't eat cooked carrots but would eat raw carrots. OK,
there is some difference but not enough to struggle over.

If she'll only eat salad with ranch dressing, buy low fat ranch. Make
at least something she'll like at dinner as well as your more adult
fare and maybe she'll try it if you don't make a fuss.

Don't underestimate the value of becoming a favorite aunt, even if you
spoil them. On a recent visit, my nephews tried my whole wheat bread
and liked it. When we ran out we bought a loaf of 9-grain bread and
they liked it. Their mother was in shock because they never ate whole
wheat for her. Then, I made gnocchi and we had bought some jarred
tomato sauce for them because my sister figured they wouldn't eat
pesto. They asked to try a bite of the one with pesto and ended up
eating the rest of the pesto one. They tried the pesto because they
remember from a previous visit that I had made something with parsley
from my garden and they said they "like it when you cook with stuff
from your garden."

So my advice is "Patience grasshopper. Go slow."

Now, having said all that, one of my nieces is coming to live with me
while she's in college. Spoiling is over :>

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

On 2 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, (H) wrote:

>We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
>to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
>ideas, etc..?

>I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
>visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
>Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
>will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
>for them.

It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this
summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short
period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your
relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>

That doesn't mean you totally give up. You can make your own
(healthier) chicken nuggets, for example. Find out what vegetables
she does like (corn? green beans? raw carrots?). My nieces and
nephews wouldn't eat cooked carrots but would eat raw carrots. OK,
there is some difference but not enough to struggle over.

If she'll only eat salad with ranch dressing, buy low fat ranch. Make
at least something she'll like at dinner as well as your more adult
fare and maybe she'll try it if you don't make a fuss.

Don't underestimate the value of becoming a favorite aunt, even if you
spoil them. On a recent visit, my nephews tried my whole wheat bread
and liked it. When we ran out we bought a loaf of 9-grain bread and
they liked it. Their mother was in shock because they never ate whole
wheat for her. Then, I made gnocchi and we had bought some jarred
tomato sauce for them because my sister figured they wouldn't eat
pesto. They asked to try a bite of the one with pesto and ended up
eating the rest of the pesto one. They tried the pesto because they
remember from a previous visit that I had made something with parsley
from my garden and they said they "like it when you cook with stuff
from your garden."

So my advice is "Patience grasshopper. Go slow."

Now, having said all that, one of my nieces is coming to live with me
while she's in college. Spoiling is over :>

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

On 2 Aug 2004 12:46:31 -0700, (H) wrote:

>We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
>to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, perparation
>ideas, etc..?

>I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
>visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
>Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
>will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
>for them.

It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this
summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short
period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your
relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>

That doesn't mean you totally give up. You can make your own
(healthier) chicken nuggets, for example. Find out what vegetables
she does like (corn? green beans? raw carrots?). My nieces and
nephews wouldn't eat cooked carrots but would eat raw carrots. OK,
there is some difference but not enough to struggle over.

If she'll only eat salad with ranch dressing, buy low fat ranch. Make
at least something she'll like at dinner as well as your more adult
fare and maybe she'll try it if you don't make a fuss.

Don't underestimate the value of becoming a favorite aunt, even if you
spoil them. On a recent visit, my nephews tried my whole wheat bread
and liked it. When we ran out we bought a loaf of 9-grain bread and
they liked it. Their mother was in shock because they never ate whole
wheat for her. Then, I made gnocchi and we had bought some jarred
tomato sauce for them because my sister figured they wouldn't eat
pesto. They asked to try a bite of the one with pesto and ended up
eating the rest of the pesto one. They tried the pesto because they
remember from a previous visit that I had made something with parsley
from my garden and they said they "like it when you cook with stuff
from your garden."

So my advice is "Patience grasshopper. Go slow."

Now, having said all that, one of my nieces is coming to live with me
while she's in college. Spoiling is over :>

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

"Curly Sue" > wrote in message
...

> It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
> have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this
> summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short
> period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your
> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>

My kids only had sugary cereal when they visited their grandparents, so they
always looked forward to those visits. At home they didn't even get sugar
on plain cereal.

I wasn't thrilled the day Mom put honey on my daughter's bread and peanut
butter. When she said "but that's what you ate" I reminded her that our
childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added, something
not seen with Kraft or Skippy.

But Grammy was also of the school of "eat all that's on your plate so that
you can have dessert" (her sons and husband were overweight --
coincidence?). Our kids weren't used to 'dessert' which at home was
generally fruit and part of the meal.

Cake & such was so rare in our home that when we took a 3 day train trip and
the middle child got carrot cake for dessert he asked whose birthday we were
celebrating. ;o)

Gabby

"Curly Sue" > wrote in message
...

> It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
> have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this
> summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short
> period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your
> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>

My kids only had sugary cereal when they visited their grandparents, so they
always looked forward to those visits. At home they didn't even get sugar
on plain cereal.

I wasn't thrilled the day Mom put honey on my daughter's bread and peanut
butter. When she said "but that's what you ate" I reminded her that our
childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added, something
not seen with Kraft or Skippy.

But Grammy was also of the school of "eat all that's on your plate so that
you can have dessert" (her sons and husband were overweight --
coincidence?). Our kids weren't used to 'dessert' which at home was
generally fruit and part of the meal.

Cake & such was so rare in our home that when we took a 3 day train trip and
the middle child got carrot cake for dessert he asked whose birthday we were
celebrating. ;o)

Gabby

"Curly Sue" > wrote in message
...

> It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
> have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this
> summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short
> period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your
> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>

My kids only had sugary cereal when they visited their grandparents, so they
always looked forward to those visits. At home they didn't even get sugar
on plain cereal.

I wasn't thrilled the day Mom put honey on my daughter's bread and peanut
butter. When she said "but that's what you ate" I reminded her that our
childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added, something
not seen with Kraft or Skippy.

But Grammy was also of the school of "eat all that's on your plate so that
you can have dessert" (her sons and husband were overweight --
coincidence?). Our kids weren't used to 'dessert' which at home was
generally fruit and part of the meal.

Cake & such was so rare in our home that when we took a 3 day train trip and
the middle child got carrot cake for dessert he asked whose birthday we were
celebrating. ;o)

Gabby

H wrote:

> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.


I think this is the answer. Make sure you don't do it as a punishment.
Merely start cooking good nourishing meals and not buying anything
else. Here's an old post that I wrote the last time the subject came up:


For the most part, though, I prefer the opposite approach. I was picky
like your children and remember the food wars of my childhood. When I
said I didn't like a food, my parents argued logic with me and did a lot
of talking about how I didn't know I didn't like it until I tried it.
All I heard was that they wanted me to swallow something unknown and
yucky. I didn't know where my disgust came from, but it was extreme. It
put me in a lot of embarrassing situations that continued until I was in
my 20s. Eating with other people was a source of anxiety as others paid
all this attention to what I was eating when I just wanted them to leave
me alone. Here's what I wish my parents had done.


Spend no family grocery money on junk. None. No chips or candy or ice
cream or sugary breakfast cereals in the house at all. Do have flour
and sugar so you can make homemade baked goods on occasion with the
kids. Prepare healthful nutritious meals consisting of meats, poultry,
fish, grains, beans, milk, cheese, vegetables, fruit and juice. Serve a
variety at each meal. Don't insist that they eat anything they're
reluctant to eat. If your children eat the lasagne and skip the salad,
they won't go hungry. If they skip both the salad and the lasagne, they
can still eat the French bread and won't starve. If they get some junk
when out or at friends' homes, don't worry about it. It isn't like
they're living on it.


Take the emotion out of eating. Do insist that your children have the
good manners to say no thank-you when refusing food. Then forget that
they've refused it and offer the same food again at some later date when
you feel like serving it. If they ask, explain that it is normal for
people's tastes to change as they grow older. They don't play with the
same toys or like the same books as they did a few years ago. Some
tastes change; some tastes stay the same. It is the same with food.
Some foods they'll always like. Some foods they might not like now and
want to try later. If you set it up like a battle, you force them to
make a big scene and complain and make gagging noises. How can they be
expected to change their minds after all that? You don't leave them a
graceful way out.


Don't turn being picky into your children's identifying characteristic.
Pay it as little attention as possible. I knew a man who introduced
his middle daughter as the one who won't eat fruits or vegetables. He
thought it was amusing and thought he was being kind because he didn't
force her. I looked at it from her point of view and thought: This is
the one thing that sets her apart from her older and younger sisters.
How's she ever going to change when she has nothing else? She's not the
artistic one or the one who's good at math or the one with the sense of
humor. No, she's the one who doesn't eat. When you're 10,
distinguishing characteristics are important. This isn't conscious, but
it is defining nonetheless.


As for actual cooking (that was your original question way back when), I
recommend NOT hiding the vegetables but make them as plain as possible.
I know that I wouldn't want to try some mystery food but might be
willing to try something if I knew exactly what it was. Being cautious
and making decisions based on information is actually a good policy in
life. You should applaud it in your children. (Imagine a drug dealer
explaining that he won't tell your children what something is but he
wants them to try it anyway. Wouldn't you want them to get all the
information they could before taking the plunge? The same is true for
taking a job, traveling to a new country, entering a sexual or romantic
relationship. Be cautious; get information; THEN try something new.)


Serve vegetables relatively plain. Involve the kids in learning to
cook. If they're willing to eat something only if it has ketchup or
salad dressing on it, put the ketchup or salad dressing on the table.
Give each child one night a week when they're in charge of choosing the
menu and learning to prepare it. Explain that they must cook a balanced
meal even if they don't choose to eat it. One child might choose
burgers, baked potaotes and carrot sticks. Take the kid to the grocery
store and show him how to look at the label on the package of hamburger,
figure out how much is needed for the family and so on. That night the
child prepares dinner with you, sets the table and helps clean up. All
this is age appropriate so a younger child might only have to watch, and
an older child might be serving the whole dinner. Make food
preparation, clean-up, and choice of what to eat go together in a
package (just like real life).


If you do find a vegetable that the kids like or object to less
strenuously than others (carrot sticks, corn on the cob, cole slaw),
serve it fairly often. It won't hurt any of you to eat corn on the cob
3 times a week (when it is so inexpensive and in season). If there's
something you like, let it show up fairly often too. All this will
serve to demystify vegetables. When they're familiar, they won't be so
scary.


And now, a question: What are the vegetables that you and your spouse
love to eat and eat all the time that your children won't touch? Would
you list them? How do you prepare them? I used to work with in health
food. People were always asking me about how to get the kids to eat
vegetables, and I'd always ask what the adults like to eat. Your answer
to that question will help me learn what to suggest.


--Lia

H wrote:

> I have been thinking about making her go "cold turkey" while she
> visits us by preparing only healthy foods whether she approves or not.
> Eventually, I am thinking that hunger will get the best of her and she
> will simply start eating the healthy foods and perhaps develop a taste
> for them.


I think this is the answer. Make sure you don't do it as a punishment.
Merely start cooking good nourishing meals and not buying anything
else. Here's an old post that I wrote the last time the subject came up:


For the most part, though, I prefer the opposite approach. I was picky
like your children and remember the food wars of my childhood. When I
said I didn't like a food, my parents argued logic with me and did a lot
of talking about how I didn't know I didn't like it until I tried it.
All I heard was that they wanted me to swallow something unknown and
yucky. I didn't know where my disgust came from, but it was extreme. It
put me in a lot of embarrassing situations that continued until I was in
my 20s. Eating with other people was a source of anxiety as others paid
all this attention to what I was eating when I just wanted them to leave
me alone. Here's what I wish my parents had done.


Spend no family grocery money on junk. None. No chips or candy or ice
cream or sugary breakfast cereals in the house at all. Do have flour
and sugar so you can make homemade baked goods on occasion with the
kids. Prepare healthful nutritious meals consisting of meats, poultry,
fish, grains, beans, milk, cheese, vegetables, fruit and juice. Serve a
variety at each meal. Don't insist that they eat anything they're
reluctant to eat. If your children eat the lasagne and skip the salad,
they won't go hungry. If they skip both the salad and the lasagne, they
can still eat the French bread and won't starve. If they get some junk
when out or at friends' homes, don't worry about it. It isn't like
they're living on it.


Take the emotion out of eating. Do insist that your children have the
good manners to say no thank-you when refusing food. Then forget that
they've refused it and offer the same food again at some later date when
you feel like serving it. If they ask, explain that it is normal for
people's tastes to change as they grow older. They don't play with the
same toys or like the same books as they did a few years ago. Some
tastes change; some tastes stay the same. It is the same with food.
Some foods they'll always like. Some foods they might not like now and
want to try later. If you set it up like a battle, you force them to
make a big scene and complain and make gagging noises. How can they be
expected to change their minds after all that? You don't leave them a
graceful way out.


Don't turn being picky into your children's identifying characteristic.
Pay it as little attention as possible. I knew a man who introduced
his middle daughter as the one who won't eat fruits or vegetables. He
thought it was amusing and thought he was being kind because he didn't
force her. I looked at it from her point of view and thought: This is
the one thing that sets her apart from her older and younger sisters.
How's she ever going to change when she has nothing else? She's not the
artistic one or the one who's good at math or the one with the sense of
humor. No, she's the one who doesn't eat. When you're 10,
distinguishing characteristics are important. This isn't conscious, but
it is defining nonetheless.


As for actual cooking (that was your original question way back when), I
recommend NOT hiding the vegetables but make them as plain as possible.
I know that I wouldn't want to try some mystery food but might be
willing to try something if I knew exactly what it was. Being cautious
and making decisions based on information is actually a good policy in
life. You should applaud it in your children. (Imagine a drug dealer
explaining that he won't tell your children what something is but he
wants them to try it anyway. Wouldn't you want them to get all the
information they could before taking the plunge? The same is true for
taking a job, traveling to a new country, entering a sexual or romantic
relationship. Be cautious; get information; THEN try something new.)


Serve vegetables relatively plain. Involve the kids in learning to
cook. If they're willing to eat something only if it has ketchup or
salad dressing on it, put the ketchup or salad dressing on the table.
Give each child one night a week when they're in charge of choosing the
menu and learning to prepare it. Explain that they must cook a balanced
meal even if they don't choose to eat it. One child might choose
burgers, baked potaotes and carrot sticks. Take the kid to the grocery
store and show him how to look at the label on the package of hamburger,
figure out how much is needed for the family and so on. That night the
child prepares dinner with you, sets the table and helps clean up. All
this is age appropriate so a younger child might only have to watch, and
an older child might be serving the whole dinner. Make food
preparation, clean-up, and choice of what to eat go together in a
package (just like real life).


If you do find a vegetable that the kids like or object to less
strenuously than others (carrot sticks, corn on the cob, cole slaw),
serve it fairly often. It won't hurt any of you to eat corn on the cob
3 times a week (when it is so inexpensive and in season). If there's
something you like, let it show up fairly often too. All this will
serve to demystify vegetables. When they're familiar, they won't be so
scary.


And now, a question: What are the vegetables that you and your spouse
love to eat and eat all the time that your children won't touch? Would
you list them? How do you prepare them? I used to work with in health
food. People were always asking me about how to get the kids to eat
vegetables, and I'd always ask what the adults like to eat. Your answer
to that question will help me learn what to suggest.


--Lia

It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
> have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this
> summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short
> period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your
> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>

Another example of letting children run the show. Not at our house. "This is
what's for supper. Take it or leave it." I can quite assure you that we're
not having tripe and liver for dinner, either.

It depends on whether you feel that your goal during the visit is to
> have a pleasant visit or is it to change her dietary habits *this
> summer.* I doubt you're going to have it both ways in such a short
> period. I'd go with having a nice visit and strengthening your
> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>

Another example of letting children run the show. Not at our house. "This is
what's for supper. Take it or leave it." I can quite assure you that we're
not having tripe and liver for dinner, either.

Kamus of Kadizhar wrote:

> No kid will starve his/herself by choice.


I agree with everything else in your post but wanted to pull this out of
context and jump on it. Children as young as 9 can have anorexia.
That's obviously not the case with the original poster's niece. I just
wanted to clear up this inaccuracy.

--Lia

Kamus of Kadizhar wrote:

> No kid will starve his/herself by choice.


I agree with everything else in your post but wanted to pull this out of
context and jump on it. Children as young as 9 can have anorexia.
That's obviously not the case with the original poster's niece. I just
wanted to clear up this inaccuracy.

--Lia

On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 22:39:53 GMT, "Marie in ME" >
wrote:

>"Curly Sue" > wrote in message
...
>> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
>> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
>> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
>> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
>> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
>> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>
>
>Another example of letting children run the show. Not at our house. "This is
>what's for supper. Take it or leave it." I can quite assure you that we're
>not having tripe and liver for dinner, either.

I have a different philosophy for guests. I ask what they want for
breakfast, eg. my mother and sister have English muffins, which I
never do. So I buy them when they visit. My mother drinks coffee,
which I don't, so I buy instant coffee for her and make sure I have
sugar substitute. My sister takes fat-free half-and-half, I buy that
for her. I alter my menus and routines for adults so they will have
an enjoyable visit. I see no reason to treat someone else's children
differently than my other guests just because they're shorter ;> I'm
not rearing them, I'm hosting them.

So yes, my guests of all ages run the show!

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

On Mon, 02 Aug 2004 22:39:53 GMT, "Marie in ME" >
wrote:

>"Curly Sue" > wrote in message
...
>> relationship. I've been having nieces and nephews visit for many
>> years and my philosophy has been "When you visit your aunt, it's
>> playtime!" I also chose my battles carefully, as far as "It's my
>> house and you do things my way (or eat what I eat)." You don't know
>> how it kills me to buy them sugary cereal, but I do. My only
>> requirement is that they take leftovers with them :>
>
>Another example of letting children run the show. Not at our house. "This is
>what's for supper. Take it or leave it." I can quite assure you that we're
>not having tripe and liver for dinner, either.

I have a different philosophy for guests. I ask what they want for
breakfast, eg. my mother and sister have English muffins, which I
never do. So I buy them when they visit. My mother drinks coffee,
which I don't, so I buy instant coffee for her and make sure I have
sugar substitute. My sister takes fat-free half-and-half, I buy that
for her. I alter my menus and routines for adults so they will have
an enjoyable visit. I see no reason to treat someone else's children
differently than my other guests just because they're shorter ;> I'm
not rearing them, I'm hosting them.

So yes, my guests of all ages run the show!

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

In article >, Michel Boucher
> wrote:

> There's a story by Russell Hoban along those lines called Bread and
> Jam for Frances, where the central character expresses a desire to
> eat only bread and jam for the rest of her life. Her mother takes
> her up on it and eventually she gets sick of bread and jam and starts
> to eat normal foods.

I loved this book when I was a kid. I'll have to see if the library
has it and read it to our kids.

Regards,
Ranee

--
Remove do not and spam to e-mail me.

"The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of
heaven and earth, does not live in shrines made by man." Acts 17:24

In article >, Michel Boucher
> wrote:

> There's a story by Russell Hoban along those lines called Bread and
> Jam for Frances, where the central character expresses a desire to
> eat only bread and jam for the rest of her life. Her mother takes
> her up on it and eventually she gets sick of bread and jam and starts
> to eat normal foods.

I loved this book when I was a kid. I'll have to see if the library
has it and read it to our kids.

Regards,
Ranee

--
Remove do not and spam to e-mail me.

"The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of
heaven and earth, does not live in shrines made by man." Acts 17:24

In article >, Michel Boucher
> wrote:

> There's a story by Russell Hoban along those lines called Bread and
> Jam for Frances, where the central character expresses a desire to
> eat only bread and jam for the rest of her life. Her mother takes
> her up on it and eventually she gets sick of bread and jam and starts
> to eat normal foods.

I loved this book when I was a kid. I'll have to see if the library
has it and read it to our kids.

Regards,
Ranee

--
Remove do not and spam to e-mail me.

"The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of
heaven and earth, does not live in shrines made by man." Acts 17:24

"Gabby" > wrote
<snip>
I reminded her that our
> childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added,
something
> not seen with Kraft or Skippy.

Then I recommend Adam's Peanut Butter! Good stuff. Ingredients: peanuts & 1%
or less salt. I love a peanut butter and honey sandwich once in a while. I
get the honey from the local market. Mmm.

--
-Andrea

"Gabby" > wrote
<snip>
I reminded her that our
> childhood peanut butter had 1/2" of oil on top and no sugar added,
something
> not seen with Kraft or Skippy.

Then I recommend Adam's Peanut Butter! Good stuff. Ingredients: peanuts & 1%
or less salt. I love a peanut butter and honey sandwich once in a while. I
get the honey from the local market. Mmm.

--
-Andrea

H wrote:

> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
> to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, preparation
> ideas, etc..?


For vegetables, try corn on the cob, baked sweet potatoes, carrot
sticks, celery sticks, cole slaw in a little mayonnaise. Don't ask me
why, but kids are more likely to go for those than broccoli, mushrooms,
zucchini or peppers. Also, kids are more likely to try broccoli and
zucchini raw than cooked. If she'll eat plain raw iceberg lettuce, see
if she'll eat romaine. Avoid mixed foods. Plain and raw is more likely
to be appealing than something with a mushroom in it that needs to
picked around or something with diced up red pepper or parsley in it.
Adults see it and think it looks pretty. Kids just see something
floating in their food.


You might try substituting whole grain breads, especially whole grain
bagels, for white bread. Also substitute brown rice for white.


Plain also works with meats. Try plain broiled lamb chops, pork chops,
steaks, chicken pieces. I know I love stews and sauces, but when
children are being picky (and I was a picky kid), they're less
suspicious of one food than something with a variety of ingredients.


For some reason, kids usually don't mind tomato sauce. There are a
whole lot of foods you can smother in tomato sauce. Offer it to her on
the side and give her the option of dipping in the sauce. You can take
advantage of her penchant for mayonnaise the same way. Give her a
crudite tray with carrots, etc. on it with a little mayonnaise in a shot
glass on the side. Show her how she can use the mayonnaise as a dip.


I'd stop periodically giving in to her cravings. She's only learning to
hold out longer. If she doesn't eat long enough, she eventually gets
what she wants. Imagine if she were whining that she wanted wanted a
particular expensive toy, and the first time you gave in after she
nagged for it once; the second time you gave in after she nagged 3
times. Later she had to nag 10 times, but you always eventually gave
in. All you'd be teaching her would be to become an obnoxious, whining,
nagging kid. That's not doing her any favors.


Thus with food. Starting today, stop giving in with the chicken
nuggets. Stop caring about what she eats at all. Just put nourishing
food on the table, maybe the corn on the cob or the sweet potatoes
mentioned above. Pay her no attention when she complains and whines for
something else. Answer her whines with "this is what we're having for
dinner." Repeat as necessary.


--Lia

H wrote:

> We have her for a few weeks every summer. What strategies can we try
> to at least get her to try some good foods? Recipes, preparation
> ideas, etc..?


For vegetables, try corn on the cob, baked sweet potatoes, carrot
sticks, celery sticks, cole slaw in a little mayonnaise. Don't ask me
why, but kids are more likely to go for those than broccoli, mushrooms,
zucchini or peppers. Also, kids are more likely to try broccoli and
zucchini raw than cooked. If she'll eat plain raw iceberg lettuce, see
if she'll eat romaine. Avoid mixed foods. Plain and raw is more likely
to be appealing than something with a mushroom in it that needs to
picked around or something with diced up red pepper or parsley in it.
Adults see it and think it looks pretty. Kids just see something
floating in their food.


You might try substituting whole grain breads, especially whole grain
bagels, for white bread. Also substitute brown rice for white.


Plain also works with meats. Try plain broiled lamb chops, pork chops,
steaks, chicken pieces. I know I love stews and sauces, but when
children are being picky (and I was a picky kid), they're less
suspicious of one food than something with a variety of ingredients.


For some reason, kids usually don't mind tomato sauce. There are a
whole lot of foods you can smother in tomato sauce. Offer it to her on
the side and give her the option of dipping in the sauce. You can take
advantage of her penchant for mayonnaise the same way. Give her a
crudite tray with carrots, etc. on it with a little mayonnaise in a shot
glass on the side. Show her how she can use the mayonnaise as a dip.


I'd stop periodically giving in to her cravings. She's only learning to
hold out longer. If she doesn't eat long enough, she eventually gets
what she wants. Imagine if she were whining that she wanted wanted a
particular expensive toy, and the first time you gave in after she
nagged for it once; the second time you gave in after she nagged 3
times. Later she had to nag 10 times, but you always eventually gave
in. All you'd be teaching her would be to become an obnoxious, whining,
nagging kid. That's not doing her any favors.


Thus with food. Starting today, stop giving in with the chicken
nuggets. Stop caring about what she eats at all. Just put nourishing
food on the table, maybe the corn on the cob or the sweet potatoes
mentioned above. Pay her no attention when she complains and whines for
something else. Answer her whines with "this is what we're having for
dinner." Repeat as necessary.


--Lia