Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
<G>" got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
fussy. In my mind there is, but I am having a difficult time
articulating it. Here is what Kimberly said:

"I was about to write, "I consider myself a picky eater"...but really,
it's everyone around me that considers me a picky eater. I've tried
pointing out to them that I am actually not picky, I just like what I
like and don't like what I don't. They didn't buy it. I admit that I do
have a touch of OCD when it comes to certain foods. Corn, for example.
Whether on the cob or off, nothing but butter, salt & pepper should
ever touch my corn. No creamed corn, no corn is soups or stews, and for
the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the corn in with the taters
and gravy! Abomination. I try, whenever possible, to make sure none of
my foods touch, unless of course they were meant to be touchy feely
with each other. For example, green beans (or any vegetable really)
should never touch the gravy, but potatoes can touch meat and gravy and
dressing. All those things get eaten as one. On the other hand, if I
have a baked potato, it doesn't get to touch anything, since it's on a
separate plate. And no sweet stuff on my savory stuff, please. No
apples with the pork, and definitely not in my dressing. No pineapple
on my ham, and not on my pizza either. The sole exception to this would
be bbq sauce, because I like the tomato-brown sugar type. Ok, so maybe
I am picky."

Where does "like what I like and don't like what I don't." fall? Fussy
or Picky?

What about, ". . .and for the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the
corn in with the taters and gravy!" Fussy or Picky?

Or, ". . . green beans (or any vegetable really) should never touch the
gravy, but potatoes can touch meat and gravy and dressing." Fussy or
Picky?

What about, "And no sweet stuff on my savory stuff, please. No apples
with the pork, and definitely not in my dressing. No pineapple on my
ham, and not on my pizza either." Fussy or Picky?

I am inclined to call Kimberly a fussy eater while I describe my
son-in-law as a picky eater. Kimberly's peculiarities make me roll my
eyes and say, "Ohfer. . . ! Whatever" and my son-in-law's leave me
grumbling about how I am to prepare a dish to satisfy his peculiarities,
a big one of which is about textures. He wants Prego out of a jar with
ground beef browned and added but heaven forfend if the amendment to the
jarred stuff should included chopped onion or celery. I want to say,
"Ohfercrissake, just eat it, will you?"

Would my well known disdain for that which is beety put me into one of
the two categories? IMO, I'd say not, because there aren't that many
things I feel that strongly about. There are lots of things I'm not
fond of but will eat if they are set in front of me.

I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
picky eater? How would you describe the differences?
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://web.me.com/barbschaller - good news 4-6-2009
"What you say about someone else says more
about you than it does about the other person."

"Melba's Jammin'" ha scritto nel messaggio

> Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
> <G>" got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
> fussy.

> I am inclined to call Kimberly a fussy eater while I describe my
> son-in-law as a picky eater. Kimberly's peculiarities make me roll my
> eyes and say, "Ohfer. . . ! Whatever" and my son-in-law's leave me >
> grumbling about how I am to prepare a dish to satisfy his peculiarities,
> a big one of which is about textures. He wants Prego out of a jar with
> ground beef browned and added but heaven forfend if the amendment to the
> jarred stuff should included chopped onion or celery. I want to say,
> "Ohfercrissake, just eat it, will you?"

They are both controlling types. Food must be the one thing they were able
to maintain control over. I wouldn't want to cook for either of them.
Maybe I have control issues in the kitchen, but I swear if I am doing the
work, I'm making the decisions. I could not care less what kindergarten
hangover crap someone is carting around in adulthood. I want them to take
it elsewhere. If I can politely eat squid, which I think is disgusting, her
effing corn could touch the potatoes and his ground beef may be acquainted
with spice and onion.
>
> Would my well known disdain for that which is beety put me into one of
> the two categories? IMO, I'd say not, because there aren't that many
> things I feel that strongly about. There are lots of things I'm not fond
> of but will eat if they are set in front of me.
>
> I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
> picky eater? How would you describe the differences?

Nope, they are both control freaks and need therapy.

On Wed, 8 Apr 2009 17:21:32 +0200, "Giusi" > wrote:

>They are both controlling types. Food must be the one thing they were able
>to maintain control over.

Being "late" is another passive way to keep control of situations. My
mother was late for everything...."we can't go until I am ready".....

Mr. Bill wrote:

>
> Being "late" is another passive way to keep control of situations. My
> mother was late for everything...."we can't go until I am ready".....

Heh. Your mother would have been left to "find her own way" to
(wherever) in my house...
--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

On Wed, 08 Apr 2009 18:35:36 +0200, ChattyCathy
> wrote:

>Heh. Your mother would have been left to "find her own way" to
>(wherever) in my house...

Yes.....but when you are the kid and she is the 'MOM', you must
remember that she has the check book and the drivers license. When
you are ten, you don't get to argue the point.

Mr. Bill wrote:

> On Wed, 08 Apr 2009 18:35:36 +0200, ChattyCathy
> > wrote:
>
>>Heh. Your mother would have been left to "find her own way" to
>>(wherever) in my house...
>
> Yes.....but when you are the kid and she is the 'MOM', you must
> remember that she has the check book and the drivers license. When
> you are ten, you don't get to argue the point.

True enough. I haven't been a kid for so long I didn't think about it
that way ;-)

But now that you've got me going down memory lane... When I was a kid,
one of my Mom's friends used to say that it was 'fashionable' to be
late. Mom told me that was a load of BS. She said her friend only did
it so she could make a 'grand entrance' and feel important when she was
always the last one to arrive at any of their social gatherings. <g>
--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy
"Sorry Dear, dinner is late, had to reboot the stove." -mrr

In article >,
"Giusi" > wrote:

> "Melba's Jammin'" ha scritto nel messaggio
>
> > Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
> > <G>" got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
> > fussy.
>
> > I am inclined to call Kimberly a fussy eater while I describe my
> > son-in-law as a picky eater. Kimberly's peculiarities make me roll my
> > eyes and say, "Ohfer. . . ! Whatever" and my son-in-law's leave me >
> > grumbling about how I am to prepare a dish to satisfy his peculiarities,
> > a big one of which is about textures. He wants Prego out of a jar with
> > ground beef browned and added but heaven forfend if the amendment to the
> > jarred stuff should included chopped onion or celery. I want to say,
> > "Ohfercrissake, just eat it, will you?"
>
> They are both controlling types. Food must be the one thing they were able
> to maintain control over. I wouldn't want to cook for either of them.
> Maybe I have control issues in the kitchen,

D'ya think? <grin>

> but I swear if I am doing the work, I'm making the decisions.

I'm inclined to agree.

> it elsewhere. If I can politely eat squid, which I think is disgusting, her
> effing corn could touch the potatoes and his ground beef may be acquainted
> with spice and onion.

Having been with and eaten with Kimberly several times, I don't remember
any fussiness about food on the plate. I have a feeling that if she
were at my table and the foods commingled a bit, she would not comment
about it but would eat it because she was a well-mannered guest in my
home. She would, I believe, not be inclined to draw attention to
something that caused discomfort to her and her alone. My SIL is
another story, not for posting, but I liketa smack 'im. :-0)

> Nope, they are both control freaks and need therapy.

I think that's pretty strong. Too strong. While they might need
therapy, I don't think being a general control freak enters in. My SIL
is pretty easy about darned near everything. Kimberly seems to be so,
also.
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://web.me.com/barbschaller - good news 4-6-2009
"What you say about someone else says more
about you than it does about the other person."

"Melba's Jammin'" > wrote in message
...
> In article >,
> "Giusi" > wrote:
>
>
>> Nope, they are both control freaks and need therapy.
>
> I think that's pretty strong. Too strong. While they might need
> therapy, I don't think being a general control freak enters in. My SIL
> is pretty easy about darned near everything. Kimberly seems to be so,
> also.

Both of my brother's sons were very picky eaters when they were little.
(Not so much now, but maybe enough to fit anyone's notion of "picky".)

They aren't control freaks, but my sister-in-law sure is. My DH and I
decided the reason the boys were so picky were because about the only
element in their lives they were allowed to choose was what they wouldn't
eat.

I'm not a picky eater at all. I'm not fond of cucumber and radishes, but
I'll eat them if they are served to me. I don't eat mollusks -- clams,
oysters, scallops, mussels -- because I developed an intolerance for them
when I was in my twenties. They taste fine going down, not so much coming
back up, if you catch my drift.

I try to feel sorry for people who are real picky eaters -- it must be a
miserable way to go through life. From time to time when someone tells me
they're a picky eater I reply, "How awful for you!" Based on the funny
looks I've gotten sometimes I have the impression that the picky eater
thinks being picky makes him superior in some way to those of us who are
cosmopolitan enough to eat a wide variety of foods.

I confess that I find being a picky eater a juvenile trait. This opinion is
bolstered by two incidents.

The first was a dinner party I once held, a kind of spur-of-the-moment thing
where I called people in the morning and said, "Come to dinner tonight."
This time (unusually for me) when guests asked if they could bring
something, I let them do so. A friend offered to bring a salad.

She brought a delicious spinach salad. I ended up serving the salad as a
first course, without thinking that my DH's brother and his wife did not eat
spinach.

Well, to be polite, they each took a small helping of salad. Then they each
took a large second helping. They were shocked to discover they actually
like raw spinach. Turns out they'd never had it before -- they could "tell
by looking at it they wouldn't like it."

Lawsamaisy -- you can tell by looking at something you wouldn't like it? Do
you never eat lobster because it looks like a large insect?

The other incident concerns the woman who brought the spinach salad. My
DH's company had some people from Australia visiting and I invited them and
a few friends to dinner. I planned a menu of American foods and included
pecan pie for dessert. I needed to make two pies to have enough and
although I would vastly have preferred to make two pecan pies, the spinach
salad friend had told me many times that she doesn't like nuts. I ended up
making an apple pie instead.

Imagine then my astonishment in seeing my friend larruping her way through
an extra large piece of pecan pie. "I made the apple pie specifically for
you," I sputtered, "since you don't eat nuts."

"Oh," she replied easily, "I eat pecan pie. I guess I'm not very
consistent."

One of our Australian guests didn't get any pecan pie.

Ever since then I haven't refrained from making a dish with nuts in it when
she was a guest. She never said anything, but if she had I would have told
her to pretend it was pecan pie.

Anny

Anny Middon wrote:


> I ended up serving the salad as a
> first course, without thinking that my DH's brother and his wife did not eat
> spinach.
>
> Well, to be polite, they each took a small helping of salad. Then they each
> took a large second helping. They were shocked to discover they actually
> like raw spinach. Turns out they'd never had it before -- they could "tell
> by looking at it they wouldn't like it."
>
> Lawsamaisy -- you can tell by looking at something you wouldn't like it? Do
> you never eat lobster because it looks like a large insect?


I had a younger cousin who lived on peanut butter and jelly
sandwiches with an
occasional slab of his mother's exceptional chocolate cake
from about age 8 till
he was married.

Whenever he was encouraged to try something else, he'd say
"I can't. My eyes
don't like it."

I haven't seen him in 40+ years so I have no idea what his
current food favorites are.

gloria p

"Anny Middon" ha scritto nel messaggio > Ever since then I haven't
refrained from making a dish with nuts in it when
> she was a guest. She never said anything, but if she had I would have
> told her to pretend it was pecan pie.
>
> Anny

I love your stories! My experience has been a lot like yours. BUT I
respect allergies, religious restrictions and intolerances. My kid has a
terrible sensitivity to iodine which precludes all seafoods, so I obviously
ask others if they have any of these problems. I also don't mind a bit if
someone at table skips a dish I made.
>
>

"Giusi" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Anny Middon" ha scritto nel messaggio > Ever since then I haven't
> refrained from making a dish with nuts in it when
>> she was a guest. She never said anything, but if she had I would have
>> told her to pretend it was pecan pie.
>>
>> Anny
>
> I love your stories! My experience has been a lot like yours. BUT I
> respect allergies, religious restrictions and intolerances. My kid has a
> terrible sensitivity to iodine which precludes all seafoods, so I
> obviously ask others if they have any of these problems. I also don't
> mind a bit if someone at table skips a dish I made.

I too respect allergies, religious restrictions and intolerances. I even
define "religious restrictions" pretty broadly -- I'll cook vegetarian or
even vegan for someone whose beliefs have nothing to do with a deity.

I also don't mind if someone skips a dish. BUT I resent making a dish
especially for someone only to have them eat the dish they swore they didn't
like.

My niece is coming for Easter dinner. The only meat she eats is chicken
breast, so I've decided to bake some chicken breasts in addition to the ham
I'll make. I'll make enough for everyone to have, because although I'm in
the mood for ham this year, I know others will eat it but prefer something
else. (OK, I'll admit it -- I'm not in the mood so much for ham as for the
split pea soup I'll make using the bone.)

My niece won't eat the potato dish I'm making, nor the cooked vegetables.
She will eat the croissants I'll make. I'm not making anything other than
the chicken in deference to her pickiness.

She's a freshman at University of Wisconsin. This year she lived in an
apartment, where she could cook and eat whatever she likes. Next year
though she'll be living in a sorority house. I'm really curious how she'll
manage.

Anny

"Giusi" wrote

> I love your stories! My experience has been a lot like yours. BUT I
> respect allergies, religious restrictions and intolerances. My kid has a
> terrible sensitivity to iodine which precludes all seafoods, so I
> obviously ask others if they have any of these problems. I also don't
> mind a bit if someone at table skips a dish I made.

Thats the hardest one for *me* to cook around. I can do it, but it isnt my
normal stuff. No Dashi for example. We had a dearly departed neighbor who
had problems with all seafoods (may have been iodine, I don't know). I
always had a few dishes he couldnt eat (and would warn him which they were
as it wasnt always obvious to the eye).

On Wed, 08 Apr 2009 11:19:26 -0500 in rec.food.cooking, Melba's Jammin'
> wrote,
> My SIL is
>another story, not for posting, but I liketa smack 'im. :-0)

"But I don't like getting smacked."

"There now, that's just because you haven't had it done right. Try it
my way! I'm sure you'll like a good smack when you find out how mine
are!"

On Wed, 08 Apr 2009 12:07:01 -0700, David Harmon wrote:

> On Wed, 08 Apr 2009 11:19:26 -0500 in rec.food.cooking, Melba's Jammin'
> > wrote,
>> My SIL is
>>another story, not for posting, but I liketa smack 'im. :-0)
>
> "But I don't like getting smacked."
>
> "There now, that's just because you haven't had it done right. Try it
> my way! I'm sure you'll like a good smack when you find out how mine
> are!"

<snort>

your pal,
blake

"Giusi" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Melba's Jammin'" ha scritto nel messaggio
>
>> Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
>> <G>" got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
>> fussy.
>
>> I am inclined to call Kimberly a fussy eater while I describe my
>> son-in-law as a picky eater. Kimberly's peculiarities make me roll my
>> eyes and say, "Ohfer. . . ! Whatever" and my son-in-law's leave me >
>> grumbling about how I am to prepare a dish to satisfy his peculiarities,
>> a big one of which is about textures. He wants Prego out of a jar with
>> ground beef browned and added but heaven forfend if the amendment to the
>> jarred stuff should included chopped onion or celery. I want to say,
>> "Ohfercrissake, just eat it, will you?"
>
> They are both controlling types. Food must be the one thing they were
> able to maintain control over. I wouldn't want to cook for either of
> them. Maybe I have control issues in the kitchen, but I swear if I am
> doing the work, I'm making the decisions. I could not care less what
> kindergarten hangover crap someone is carting around in adulthood. I want
> them to take it elsewhere. If I can politely eat squid, which I think is
> disgusting, her effing corn could touch the potatoes and his ground beef
> may be acquainted with spice and onion.
>>
>> Would my well known disdain for that which is beety put me into one of
>> the two categories? IMO, I'd say not, because there aren't that many
>> things I feel that strongly about. There are lots of things I'm not
>> fond of but will eat if they are set in front of me.
>>
>> I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
>> picky eater? How would you describe the differences?
>
> Nope, they are both control freaks and need therapy.

Totally agree. And a great deal of that is for the attention they receive.
They not only thrive on even negative attention but they love it that they
can twist you into doing something like preparing a special dish just for
them. Which they often won't even eat they just wanted the special
attention. And if you want a complete disaster have a vegan as a dinner
guest. I swear to god if ever I find one of those OCD whack jobs in my home
again I will drive them out any means including force feeding them raw
steak.

Paul

Melba's Jammin' wrote:
> Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
> <G>" got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
> fussy. In my mind there is, but I am having a difficult time
> articulating it. Here is what Kimberly said:

snippage...

>
> I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
> picky eater? How would you describe the differences?


I think there is difference between fussy and picky. Kimberly sound
fussy to me as well. The DH calls me picky because I don't eat fish.
He will eat nearly anything. BUT corn - is disgusting - to him anyway
and forget about meatloaf.

I do not consider myself picky - but I don't like certain things either.
My in laws think I am weird because I don't like tongue or heart or
cow's feet. Whenever we go to their place for dinner and they make
something like this, there is usually other things to eat as well like
salad or other veggies. I make do.They offer to cook something extra for
me but I tell them it is not necessary.

If I had THEM at my place and they didn't like the main course they
would bring their own food or we would have to make something for that
person. I recall a Thanksgiving where my new SIL said she was allergic
to turkey and we had to cook her a steak. She isn't allergic to turkey
anymore. Amazing. During another Thanksgiving a different SIL brought a
small roasted chicken - for herself. Really.

There was a show on food tv not too long ago about people with weird
food hangups. One guy only ate cheese sandwiches and that's it. He was
single. Shocking, I know.

-Tracy

Melba's Jammin' wrote:

> "I was about to write, "I consider myself a picky eater"...but really,
> it's everyone around me that considers me a picky eater. I've tried
> pointing out to them that I am actually not picky, I just like what I
> like and don't like what I don't. They didn't buy it. I admit that I
> do have a touch of OCD when it comes to certain foods. Corn, for
> example. Whether on the cob or off, nothing but butter, salt & pepper
> should ever touch my corn. No creamed corn, no corn is soups or
> stews, and for the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the corn in
> with the taters and gravy! Abomination. I try, whenever possible, to
> make sure none of my foods touch, unless of course they were meant to
> be touchy feely with each other. For example, green beans (or any
> vegetable really) should never touch the gravy, but potatoes can
> touch meat and gravy and dressing. All those things get eaten as one.
> On the other hand, if I have a baked potato, it doesn't get to touch
> anything, since it's on a separate plate. And no sweet stuff on my
> savory stuff, please. No apples with the pork, and definitely not in
> my dressing. No pineapple on my ham, and not on my pizza either. The
> sole exception to this would be bbq sauce, because I like the
> tomato-brown sugar type. Ok, so maybe I am picky."
>
> Where does "like what I like and don't like what I don't." fall?
> Fussy or Picky?
>
> What about, ". . .and for the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix
> the corn in with the taters and gravy!" Fussy or Picky?
>
> Or, ". . . green beans (or any vegetable really) should never touch
> the gravy, but potatoes can touch meat and gravy and dressing."
> Fussy or Picky?
>
> What about, "And no sweet stuff on my savory stuff, please. No apples
> with the pork, and definitely not in my dressing. No pineapple on my
> ham, and not on my pizza either." Fussy or Picky?
>
> I am inclined to call Kimberly a fussy eater while I describe my
> son-in-law as a picky eater. Kimberly's peculiarities make me roll my
> eyes and say, "Ohfer. . . ! Whatever" and my son-in-law's leave me
> grumbling about how I am to prepare a dish to satisfy his
> peculiarities, a big one of which is about textures. He wants Prego
> out of a jar with ground beef browned and added but heaven forfend if
> the amendment to the jarred stuff should included chopped onion or
> celery. I want to say, "Ohfercrissake, just eat it, will you?"
>
> Would my well known disdain for that which is beety put me into one of
> the two categories? IMO, I'd say not, because there aren't that many
> things I feel that strongly about. There are lots of things I'm not
> fond of but will eat if they are set in front of me.
>
> I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater
> and a picky eater? How would you describe the differences?

To me, if you find everyone around you is all the time having to
change what's on the menu because you don't like it, you're picky.
It's annoying after a while, and who decided you're the last word
on what's for dinner.

If you like to eat your food the way it was made, for instance,
you made your green bean recipe and it didn't include potatoes
and gravy, why is it weird you'd like them to stay that way. In
other words, I like the individual flavors and textures of the stuff
on my plate. I guess that can be called fussy, but I don't think
it's skin off anyone's teeth how you arrange your food on your
own plate.

Don't get me wrong, I don't get crazy if my food touches. It
really is not that big a deal* if it happens. But I get that one
would rather the gravy not leach over into the green beans.

*It is a big deal if you get maple syrup on my bacon. Don't
go there. Heh.

nancy

>
> *It is a big deal if you get maple syrup on my bacon. *Don't
> go there. *Heh.
>
> nancy *- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

But maple syrup and bacon just GO TOGETHER! LOL.

N.

Nancy2 wrote:
>> *It is a big deal if you get maple syrup on my bacon. Don't
>> go there. Heh.

> But maple syrup and bacon just GO TOGETHER! LOL.

Don't make me come over there!! (laugh) I'll hurt you!

nancy

"Nancy Young" > wrote in message
...
> Nancy2 wrote:
>>> *It is a big deal if you get maple syrup on my bacon. Don't
>>> go there. Heh.
>
>> But maple syrup and bacon just GO TOGETHER! LOL.
>
> Don't make me come over there!! (laugh) I'll hurt you!
>
> nancy



I'm with you on this one. Don't give me "maple cured" bacon, either. Maple
belongs on pancakes or waffles, not on bacon.

Jill

In article >,
"jmcquown" > wrote:

> "Nancy Young" > wrote in message
> ...
> > Nancy2 wrote:
> >>> *It is a big deal if you get maple syrup on my bacon. Don't
> >>> go there. Heh.
> >
> >> But maple syrup and bacon just GO TOGETHER! LOL.
> >
> > Don't make me come over there!! (laugh) I'll hurt you!
> >
> > nancy
>
>
>
> I'm with you on this one. Don't give me "maple cured" bacon, either. Maple
> belongs on pancakes or waffles, not on bacon.
>
> Jill

Oh my!

One of my favorite things of all time is eating pancakes with butter and
maple syrup, and letting the accompanying bacon or sausage get some of
the syrup on it. ;-d

'course that's not QUITE the same as the pre-flavored stuff. I don't
care much for that either.
--
Peace! Om

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.
It's about learning to dance in the rain.
-- Anon.

jmcquown wrote:
> "Nancy Young" > wrote in message
> ...
>> Nancy2 wrote:
>>>> *It is a big deal if you get maple syrup on my bacon. Don't
>>>> go there. Heh.
>>
>>> But maple syrup and bacon just GO TOGETHER! LOL.
>>
>> Don't make me come over there!! (laugh) I'll hurt you!
>>
>> nancy
>
>
>
> I'm with you on this one. Don't give me "maple cured" bacon, either.
> Maple belongs on pancakes or waffles, not on bacon.
>
> Jill


Maple bacon or sausage are deeeee-licious.

gloria p

On Wed, 8 Apr 2009 11:26:13 -0400, "Nancy Young"
> wrote:

>*It is a big deal if you get maple syrup on my bacon. Don't
>go there. Heh.

I don't mind it on my bacon as much as I do on my eggs. UGH.

--
I love cooking with wine.
Sometimes I even put it in the food.

"Melba's Jammin'" > wrote in message
...
> Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
> <G>" got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
> fussy. In my mind there is, but I am having a difficult time
> articulating it. Here is what Kimberly said:
snip examples
> Would my well known disdain for that which is beety put me into one of
> the two categories? IMO, I'd say not, because there aren't that many
> things I feel that strongly about. There are lots of things I'm not
> fond of but will eat if they are set in front of me.
>
> I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
> picky eater? How would you describe the differences?
> --
> -Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
When you started your post, I was ready to say that there is a difference
between fussy and picky. Your aversion to beets is just one of simple
dislike that I would cater to no differently than I would to someone that
had a dietary reason for not eating something. But fussy and picky have
merged in my mind based on your examples. The examples given are ones that
we have all seen in children at one time or another. There is no good
reason for eating that way other than psychological. However, I'm guessing
that to the eater the habit is strongly important. The PITA eater is one
that changes their mind about what they will eat and won't eat according to
how contrary they are feeling at the time. The PITAs make you want to smack
them hard.
No clear thoughts on this one.
Janet

>
> "I was about to write, "I consider myself a picky eater"...but really,
> it's everyone around me that considers me a picky eater. I've tried
> pointing out to them that I am actually not picky, I just like what I
> like and don't like what I don't. They didn't buy it. I admit that I do
> have a touch of OCD when it comes to certain foods. Corn, for example.
> Whether on the cob or off, nothing but butter, salt & pepper should
> ever touch my corn. No creamed corn, no corn is soups or stews, and for
> the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the corn in with the taters
> and gravy!
>
> Where does "like what I like and don't like what I don't." fall? *Fussy
> or Picky?
>
> What about, ". . .and for the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the
> corn in with the taters and gravy!" *Fussy or Picky?
>
> Or, ". . . green beans (or any vegetable really) should never touch the
> gravy, but potatoes can touch meat and gravy and dressing." *Fussy or
> Picky?

> I am inclined to call Kimberly a fussy eater while I describe my
> son-in-law as a picky eater. *Kimberly's peculiarities make me roll my
> eyes and say, "Ohfer. . . ! *Whatever" and my son-in-law's leave me
> grumbling about how I am to prepare a dish to satisfy his peculiarities,
> a big one of which is about textures. *He wants Prego out of a jar with
> ground beef browned and added but heaven forfend if the amendment to the
> jarred stuff should included chopped onion or celery. *I want to say,
> "Ohfercrissake, just eat it, will you?"
>
> Would my well known disdain for that which is beety put me into one of
> the two categories? *IMO, I'd say not, because there aren't that many
> things I feel that strongly about. *There are lots of things I'm not
> fond of but will eat if they are set in front of me.
>
> I repeat my question: *Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
> picky eater? *How would you describe the differences?
> --
> -Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJhttp://web.me.com/barbschaller- good news 4-6-2009
> "What you say about someone else says more
> about you than it does about the other person."

I'm with Kath on the corn thing, because (1) corn should always stand
alone, and (2) I'm from the "I-O-Way, Where the Tall Corn Grows." If
I see it mixed in anything - like salsa, or cold salad - it looks like
vomit to me....can't eat it.

I'm also with her a little bit on the potatoes-gravy-dressing thing is
o.k., ...but I'm not fussy about foods touching each other.

Definitions to me: Fussy - means I'll eat anything but they have to
behave to my standards when on the plate. Picky means I will only eat
certain things fixed a certain way, or not at all in some cases.

My sons don't like celery in dressing or any casserole - in anything,
actually. I call that picky.

Fussy is my thing about corn not being mixed in soup, salad, salsa, or
anything else.

N.

Nancy2 wrote:

> I'm from the "I-O-Way, Where the Tall Corn Grows."

Dammit, now I've got that song running through my head...

Bob

On Apr 8, 10:01*am, Melba's Jammin' >
wrote:
> Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About


Sorry, I should have said, "Kim," not "Kath." (And I never even
watched that show!) LOL.

N.

On Apr 8, 8:01*am, Melba's Jammin' > wrote:
> Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
> <G>" *got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
> fussy. * [snip]
> I repeat my question: *Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
> picky eater? *How would you describe the differences?

One word means much the same as the other, to me. The distinction I
make is between those attitudes and behaviors that I am willing to try
to accommodate and those that I won't. Food dislikes don't bother me--
anyone is welcome to not want anything on the grounds of taste,
texture, flavor combinations or whatever and I'll try not to serve it
to them. Ideological or religious dislikes seem less legitimate to
me, probably because food and eating matter more to me than most
ideologies and religions, but I'll usually find an accommodation
(given plenty of advance notice) for such things. Behavioral things
like which foods can touch are their own problem and I don't have to
do anything about them one way or the other. If someone wants to
deconstruct the way I present a plate of food, that doesn't bother me,
but I'm not going to ensure that the meat doesn't touch the vegetable
just for somebody's personal childhood history.

Generally speaking, I'm feeding or entertaining folks in the hope they
enjoy themselves so I'm willing to meet their (self-perceived) needs
at least halfway.

What I won't do is enforce one person's bias/fear/ideology/foolishness
on other people. If I'm putting on, say, a Chinese multi-course
feast, and one of the guests doesn't eat pork, I'll have plenty for
that person to eat but I will probably have pork dishes for the other
guests. Likewise, one vegetarian diner does not mandate that all eat
vegetarian. But if beets are on the menu, they are on the menu even
if Barb is coming. She'll like the rest of it. -aem

In article
>,
wrote:

> What I won't do is enforce one person's bias/fear/ideology/foolishness
> on other people. If I'm putting on, say, a Chinese multi-course
> feast, and one of the guests doesn't eat pork, I'll have plenty for
> that person to eat but I will probably have pork dishes for the other
> guests. Likewise, one vegetarian diner does not mandate that all eat
> vegetarian. But if beets are on the menu, they are on the menu even
> if Barb is coming. She'll like the rest of it. -aem

Barb would probably *love* the rest of it. You are one of the rare
gifts on this group. I'd treasured an invitation, would pass (without
comment, in your home) on the beets, and would bring a nice host/hostess
gift ‹ probably some jam.
--
-Barb, Mother Superior, HOSSSPoJ
http://web.me.com/barbschaller - good news 4-6-2009
"What you say about someone else says more
about you than it does about the other person."

Melba's Jammin' wrote:

>
> I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and
> a
> picky eater?

No.

> How would you describe the differences?

N/A.

--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy
"Sorry Dear, dinner is late, had to reboot the stove." -mrr

Melba's Jammin' > wrote:

> "I was about to write, "I consider myself a picky eater"...but really,
> it's everyone around me that considers me a picky eater. I've tried
> pointing out to them that I am actually not picky, I just like what I

I'm in the same boat. There are some things I don't like, some more
than others, but not all that many in my opinion, yet my wife insists
that I'm picky. I'll eat stuff that I don't like, but if given a choice
I'm not going to ask for brussel sprouts, for example.

> like and don't like what I don't. They didn't buy it. I admit that I do
> have a touch of OCD when it comes to certain foods. Corn, for example.
> Whether on the cob or off, nothing but butter, salt & pepper should
> ever touch my corn. No creamed corn, no corn is soups or stews, and for
> the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the corn in with the taters
> and gravy! Abomination. I try, whenever possible, to make sure none of

When I was young I was a lot worse about this sort of thing. I wanted
to taste the individual things I was eating, and still do to some extent,
but I'm not nearly as fussy about it as I used to be. Now the corn
thing I sort of understand. I grew up on chicken/corn soup. Corn
by itself should really be by itself and not mixed in with the mashed
potatoes or whatever, but I have no problem with it as an ingredient
in other things. Creamed corn, well bleah, never have liked it.

> separate plate. And no sweet stuff on my savory stuff, please. No
> apples with the pork, and definitely not in my dressing. No pineapple
> on my ham, and not on my pizza either. The sole exception to this would
> be bbq sauce, because I like the tomato-brown sugar type. Ok, so maybe
> I am picky."

I know! My wife thinrks pork with apples is great, and mint jelly on lamb.
Whoever thought that was a good idea!? Oh yeah, she likes apples with
sharp cheddar, also! So, maybe I'm picky too, because I don't really
like any of those combinations.

> Where does "like what I like and don't like what I don't." fall? Fussy
> or Picky?

I would say the fussy eater is the one who doesn't like stuff to
touch on their plate. The picky eater doesn't like specific foods.
So you are more fussy than me, from your description, but probably
about as picky, just not about the exact same things. I do have to
agree with you on beets . . . ;-)

Bill Ranck
Blacksburg, Va.

> I would say the fussy eater is the one who doesn't like stuff to
> touch on their plate. *The picky eater doesn't like specific foods.
> So you are more fussy than me, from your description, but probably
> about as picky, just not about the exact same things. >
> Bill Ranck
> Blacksburg, Va.

Good, we agree on terminology. I really think there is a distinction
to be made, regardless if it's a negative thing or not.

N.

On Apr 8, 11:06*am, Nancy2 > wrote:
> > I would say the fussy eater is the one who doesn't like stuff to
> > touch on their plate. *The picky eater doesn't like specific foods.
> > So you are more fussy than me, from your description, but probably
> > about as picky, just not about the exact same things. >
> > Bill Ranck
> > Blacksburg, Va.
>
> Good, we agree on terminology. *I really think there is a distinction
> to be made, regardless if it's a negative thing or not.
>
> N.

I disagree. I think a picky eater is someone who dislikes particular
foods, or food relationships (textures, eg.) to the point where they
avoid eating them or refuse to eat them. A fussy eater is someone who
expects others to honor their own food preferences and dislikes,
rather than attempting to just eat what they can.

My examples: my brother's best friend who only ate nine things. He'd
cheerfully go without eating if none of the nine were available.
That's a picky eater. My niece who decided to be a vegetarian but
insisted that people provide her with cheese pizza because she didn't
really like vegetables - fussy eater.

Susan B.

On Thu, 9 Apr 2009 16:31:09 -0700 (PDT), sueb >
wrote:

>My niece who decided to be a vegetarian but
>insisted that people provide her with cheese pizza because she didn't
>really like vegetables - fussy eater.

Goodness, what did she eat as a vegetarian? Bread and cheese?

--
I love cooking with wine.
Sometimes I even put it in the food.

"Melba's Jammin'" > wrote in message
...
> Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
> <G>" got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
> fussy. In my mind there is, but I am having a difficult time
> articulating it. Here is what Kimberly said:
>
> "I was about to write, "I consider myself a picky eater"...but really,
> it's everyone around me that considers me a picky eater. I've tried
> pointing out to them that I am actually not picky, I just like what I
> like and don't like what I don't. They didn't buy it. I admit that I do
> have a touch of OCD when it comes to certain foods. Corn, for example.
> Whether on the cob or off, nothing but butter, salt & pepper should
> ever touch my corn. No creamed corn, no corn is soups or stews, and for
> the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the corn in with the taters
> and gravy! Abomination. I try, whenever possible, to make sure none of
> my foods touch, unless of course they were meant to be touchy feely
> with each other. For example, green beans (or any vegetable really)
> should never touch the gravy, but potatoes can touch meat and gravy and
> dressing. All those things get eaten as one. On the other hand, if I
> have a baked potato, it doesn't get to touch anything, since it's on a
> separate plate. And no sweet stuff on my savory stuff, please. No
> apples with the pork, and definitely not in my dressing. No pineapple
> on my ham, and not on my pizza either. The sole exception to this would
> be bbq sauce, because I like the tomato-brown sugar type. Ok, so maybe
> I am picky."
>
> Where does "like what I like and don't like what I don't." fall? Fussy
> or Picky?
>
> What about, ". . .and for the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the
> corn in with the taters and gravy!" Fussy or Picky?
>
> Or, ". . . green beans (or any vegetable really) should never touch the
> gravy, but potatoes can touch meat and gravy and dressing." Fussy or
> Picky?
>
> What about, "And no sweet stuff on my savory stuff, please. No apples
> with the pork, and definitely not in my dressing. No pineapple on my
> ham, and not on my pizza either." Fussy or Picky?
>
> I am inclined to call Kimberly a fussy eater while I describe my
> son-in-law as a picky eater. Kimberly's peculiarities make me roll my
> eyes and say, "Ohfer. . . ! Whatever" and my son-in-law's leave me
> grumbling about how I am to prepare a dish to satisfy his peculiarities,
> a big one of which is about textures. He wants Prego out of a jar with
> ground beef browned and added but heaven forfend if the amendment to the
> jarred stuff should included chopped onion or celery. I want to say,
> "Ohfercrissake, just eat it, will you?"
>
> Would my well known disdain for that which is beety put me into one of
> the two categories? IMO, I'd say not, because there aren't that many
> things I feel that strongly about. There are lots of things I'm not
> fond of but will eat if they are set in front of me.
>
> I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
> picky eater? How would you describe the differences?


Absolutely no difference. They are both a complete royal pain in the ass
and I simply will not entertain their childish behavior. The last straw was
just one of those you described who ruined my Christmas Eve dinner in 07.
By the time she left I was about ready to throw her out on her ear. The
bitch even drove herself to the market to get fixings for her own hors
d'ouevres because I didn't make any she wanted to eat.

Nuts to them all. They will ruin any gathering and make you wish you had
never bothered. So whatever differences in motivation are irrelevant as
they are all a pain in the butt.

Paul

In article >,
"Paul M. Cook" > wrote:

> > I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
> > picky eater? How would you describe the differences?
>
>
> Absolutely no difference. They are both a complete royal pain in the ass
> and I simply will not entertain their childish behavior. The last straw was
> just one of those you described who ruined my Christmas Eve dinner in 07.
> By the time she left I was about ready to throw her out on her ear. The
> bitch even drove herself to the market to get fixings for her own hors
> d'ouevres because I didn't make any she wanted to eat.
>
> Nuts to them all. They will ruin any gathering and make you wish you had
> never bothered. So whatever differences in motivation are irrelevant as
> they are all a pain in the butt.
>
> Paul

<lol> If I am serving some specific dinner guests, I'll happily discuss
the menu with them (usually via e-mail) prior to their visit, and cook
according to their wishes.

I consider it to be a challenge.

It's why we ended up with grilled shark steak for Christmas dinner
instead of roast ham. :-) They are not "picky" eaters per se', but they
have a specific set of dietary guidelines they prefer to follow, and
fortunately they are similar to mine, just a bit more strict.

They brought some fresh greens from their garden that xxx and I prepped
for steaming while I was getting everything else ready.

I don't mind doing that. I don't often cook "fancy" for myself, but I
love to cook for an appreciative audience and would rather they enjoy
something instead of eating it to be polite. Truly!

And I love it that they went back for "seconds". ;-) I put the extra
food on the table so they could help themselves.
--
Peace! Om

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.
It's about learning to dance in the rain.
-- Anon.

Omelet wrote:

> <lol> If I am serving some specific dinner guests, I'll happily discuss
> the menu with them (usually via e-mail) prior to their visit, and cook
> according to their wishes.

At what point in that process are you the hostess rather than just a
cook at the home-restaurant they agreed to eat at that night??
Do you let them dictate the entire menu, dining hour, drinks and dessert?

In article >,
Goomba > wrote:

> Omelet wrote:
>
> > <lol> If I am serving some specific dinner guests, I'll happily discuss
> > the menu with them (usually via e-mail) prior to their visit, and cook
> > according to their wishes.
>
> At what point in that process are you the hostess rather than just a
> cook at the home-restaurant they agreed to eat at that night??
> Do you let them dictate the entire menu, dining hour, drinks and dessert?

Why not? I'm serving THEM, not me!
--
Peace! Om

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.
It's about learning to dance in the rain.
-- Anon.

"Omelet" ha scritto nel messaggio
> Goomba wrote:
>
>> Omelet wrote:
>>
>> > <lol> If I am serving some specific dinner guests, I'll happily discuss
>> > > the menu with them (usually via e-mail) prior to their visit, and
>> > cook according to their wishes.
>>
>> At what point in that process are you the hostess rather than just a cook
>> at the home-restaurant they agreed to eat at that night??
>> Do you let them dictate the entire menu, dining hour, drinks and dessert?
>
> Why not? I'm serving THEM, not me!

Om, that's not how entertaining generally works. Hosts generally make what
they want, what they can afford, what interests them and what they are
capable of cooking. Other than life threatening allergies, guests don't
really have a say in menus.
Do you remember the brouhaha over how a "hostess" assigned someone from
here to bring a scaldingly expensive dish and wine to a party? And that no
one here thought she was hosting a party, just gouging some neighbors? Your
"order it up right here" take on it sort of asks for that.
I cook for money. I ask restrictions ahead of time but I make up the menus.
Most of my clients now know enough about Italian cookery to have input, but
when I started people would suggest what sounded like the menu at Olive
Garden or some other chain. Of course any of us can cook that, but why? I
would think the same of your guests. You know a lot more about what you do
very well than they can. You know what's in season, whatìs in the markets,
what you personally can do with those things.
As I read this thread I imagined someone from here getting invited to the
White House and trying to tell Michelle Obama what to serve them and what
they didn't like.

On Wed, 08 Apr 2009 10:01:06 -0500, Melba's Jammin'
> wrote:

>Kimberly's reply in Jill's thread, "Let's Talk About Picky Eater's Again
><G>" got me to wondering if there is a difference between picky and
>fussy. In my mind there is, but I am having a difficult time
>articulating it. Here is what Kimberly said:
>
>"I was about to write, "I consider myself a picky eater"...but really,
>it's everyone around me that considers me a picky eater. I've tried
>pointing out to them that I am actually not picky, I just like what I
>like and don't like what I don't. They didn't buy it. I admit that I do
>have a touch of OCD when it comes to certain foods. Corn, for example.
>Whether on the cob or off, nothing but butter, salt & pepper should
>ever touch my corn. No creamed corn, no corn is soups or stews, and for
>the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the corn in with the taters
>and gravy! Abomination. I try, whenever possible, to make sure none of
>my foods touch, unless of course they were meant to be touchy feely
>with each other. For example, green beans (or any vegetable really)
>should never touch the gravy, but potatoes can touch meat and gravy and
>dressing. All those things get eaten as one. On the other hand, if I
>have a baked potato, it doesn't get to touch anything, since it's on a
>separate plate. And no sweet stuff on my savory stuff, please. No
>apples with the pork, and definitely not in my dressing. No pineapple
>on my ham, and not on my pizza either. The sole exception to this would
>be bbq sauce, because I like the tomato-brown sugar type. Ok, so maybe
>I am picky."
>
>Where does "like what I like and don't like what I don't." fall? Fussy
>or Picky?
>
>What about, ". . .and for the love of all things Holy, do *not* mix the
>corn in with the taters and gravy!" Fussy or Picky?
>
>Or, ". . . green beans (or any vegetable really) should never touch the
>gravy, but potatoes can touch meat and gravy and dressing." Fussy or
>Picky?
>
>What about, "And no sweet stuff on my savory stuff, please. No apples
>with the pork, and definitely not in my dressing. No pineapple on my
>ham, and not on my pizza either." Fussy or Picky?
>
>I am inclined to call Kimberly a fussy eater while I describe my
>son-in-law as a picky eater. Kimberly's peculiarities make me roll my
>eyes and say, "Ohfer. . . ! Whatever" and my son-in-law's leave me
>grumbling about how I am to prepare a dish to satisfy his peculiarities,
>a big one of which is about textures. He wants Prego out of a jar with
>ground beef browned and added but heaven forfend if the amendment to the
>jarred stuff should included chopped onion or celery. I want to say,
>"Ohfercrissake, just eat it, will you?"
>
>Would my well known disdain for that which is beety put me into one of
>the two categories? IMO, I'd say not, because there aren't that many
>things I feel that strongly about. There are lots of things I'm not
>fond of but will eat if they are set in front of me.
>
>I repeat my question: Is there a difference between a fussy eater and a
>picky eater? How would you describe the differences?


I am so thankful. My SIL is coming next week for a visit. I asked
her if there was anything she couldn't eat or didn't like. Her
response was "Never seen anything I don't like to eat." We shall have
fun.

--
Susan N.

"Moral indignation is in most cases two percent moral,
48 percent indignation, and 50 percent envy."
Vittorio De Sica, Italian movie director (1901-1974)