I WONDER WHY A LUMP GREAT LOAF OF AN EX-SPECIAL FORCE GUY NEEDS A HUGE
MUTT TO PROTECT HIMSELF----
LUCAS IS A SMALL MAN IN A B I G BODY!!!

Read below what sad ass lucas said:



I'll know when you're near........ my dog will be trying to eat
you :-)


She bit a door to door God-botherer about 15mins ago!!! :-)

He tried coming up towards the stairs, I was on the balcony saying
"Don't bother, you'd better not come any closer because she may bite
you",

He said "I trust in the Lord to protect me and look after me",

I said "Do *NOT* come to the stairs, she *will* bite you"

He said "The Lord will look after me, and I'd like to talk to you
about
letting him look after you too"

Then my dog bit him..... several times. I just stood there and said
"I
told you" :-)

I laughed in his face when he started whinging and wanting towels and
bandages to stop the blood flow, but threw him the crappy old towel
we
have at the front door to wipe our (wet) feet on.

Even *then* he was still trying to push his barrow to me!!

Me.."Looks like your 'Lord' is doing a bang-up job in looking after
you,
hey?"

Him..."There was obviously a reason why the Lord let this happen"


(This is when I started laughing.......!!)

Me.."Yeah...he's telling you to STFU and listen when someone tells
you
that their dog will bite you!!"

Him.."I need to go to the hopsital, I need to get shots and I
probably
need stiches"

Me.. "You're lucky my dog thinks you're a clown"

Him.."What?"

Me.."She thinks you taste funny, she spat you out, otherwise she'd be
chewing on your leg bone about now!!"

Him.."I need a taxi"

Me.."Your Lords looking after you, get *him* to call you a cab"


As his offsider (who had half a brain and decided to stay out of
reach
of the pooch) helped him limp off down the street to (presumably) go
to
the hospital, I stood on the balcony, looked up and down the street
and
yelled "NEXT!!"

That's made my frikken day, I can tell you!!!

The pooch is going to have a *huge* BBQ'd medium-rare dinasour rump
steak tonight for her dinner :-)


Bloody god-botherers coming around at 7am on a Saturday bloody
morning!!

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