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The latest Dead Spread A++
I think I'm gonna try to be a Jew when I die so I can have a Dead Spread
at least as good as today's. It was a very classy affair with lovely presentation and appointments. I've never attended a Jewish funeral and it was a lovely memorial service for my friend's sister. The rabbi was a young chap and his words were very nice. A couple of the Psalms read were very familiar and the prayer after the kaddish was some bunch of beautiful words -- one of the women from school who was there said she has it and is going to resurrect it and send it to me. If I don't hear from her within a week or so, I'll contact the synagogue. The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy dish - it had potatoes in it; a beautiful fruit plate with cantaloupe, whole strawberries, honeydew, and grapes; scalloped pineapple (I think); tuna salad; mixed breads; lox with onion, tomatoes, and cucumbers. The synagogue is bright and new and their social area is in the front of the building at the main entrance. The tables were appointed with cloths and stemmed glasses with cloth napkins artfully folded and tucked in each glass. I think there was a dessert table but I didn't see it. Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-15-2006, RIP Connie Drew |
The latest Dead Spread A++
Weirdly enough, the only funerals I've ever been to have been Jewish.
Why this is I don't know. When my Christian relatives have died, they've all been overseas. Anyway, I know the drill very well, and find it moving. Lo, tho I walk through the valley of the Shadow of Death, I will fear no evil. Gives me a chill every time, and then I weep. All those tears make the endorphins or something kick in, and you emerge from the graveyard very hungry. Wash the hands with the ritual ewer, then eat! Works for me. Leila |
The latest Dead Spread A++
Barb wrote:
> The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy > dish - it had potatoes in it Might that have been potato kugel? Here's a typical recipe: Potato Kugel 6 medium potatoes 3 eggs, beaten 3/4 C flour (+-) 1 onion 1/2 tsp. salt dash of white pepper 4 tbsp. shortening Preheat oven to 375°F. Peel potatoes and grate them finely. Squeeze out excess liquid. Grate onions into the potato pulp. Add beaten eggs, salt and enough flour to make a batter that will drop from a spoon. Melt shortening and then fold into the batter. Pour the batter into a greased 9-inch square baking pan. Bake 30-40 minutes until nicely browned and crisp at the edges. May be served with Applesauce. Bob |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Fri, 27 Jan 2006, Melba's Jammin' wrote: <snipped> > > The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy > dish - it had potatoes in it; a beautiful fruit plate with cantaloupe, > whole strawberries, honeydew, and grapes; scalloped pineapple (I think); > tuna salad; mixed breads; lox with onion, tomatoes, and cucumbers. The > synagogue is bright and new and their social area is in the front of the > building at the main entrance. The tables were appointed with cloths > and stemmed glasses with cloth napkins artfully folded and tucked in > each glass. I think there was a dessert table but I didn't see it. > > Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. > -- > http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-15-2006, RIP Connie Drew > Sorry for your loss. Was this an organized spread? Or contributions by family and friends? Sure sounds like a good one. Elaine, too |
The latest Dead Spread A++
In article
>, Elaine Parrish > wrote: (snipped) > Was this an organized spread? Or contributions by family and friends? > Sure sounds like a good one. > > Elaine, too Clearly catered. Catering staff (one woman, anyway) meandered through the tables to see if we needed anything, if everything was all right. -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet |
The latest Dead Spread A++
In article >,
"Bob Terwilliger" > wrote: > Potato Kugel > > 6 medium potatoes > 3 eggs, beaten > 3/4 C flour (+-) > 1 onion > 1/2 tsp. salt > dash of white pepper > 4 tbsp. shortening > > Preheat oven to 375°F. Peel potatoes and grate them finely. Squeeze out > excess liquid. Grate onions into the potato pulp. Add beaten eggs, salt and > enough flour to make a batter that will drop from a spoon. Melt shortening > and then fold into the batter. Pour the batter into a greased 9-inch square > baking pan. Bake 30-40 minutes until nicely browned and crisp at the edges. > May be served with Applesauce. > > > Bob This was not like that. If I'd seen one other camera out I would have taken a picture. What I ate had sliced potato in it. What kind of struck me is that the two dishes - the pineapple one being the other - were rather similar in appearance -- both having that eggy custardy look. Question re the kugel above: I don't have a box grater like my mom had. When I make potato pancakes I shred them finely in the fp then chop the shreds with the steel blade, creating the kind of potato mush that you're describing -- any clue if what I'm doing results in a substantial difference from grating the whole potatoes? -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 07:48:39 -0600, Melba's Jammin'
> wrote: >In article >, > Elaine Parrish > wrote: >(snipped) > >> Was this an organized spread? Or contributions by family and friends? >> Sure sounds like a good one. >> >> Elaine, too > >Clearly catered. Catering staff (one woman, anyway) meandered through >the tables to see if we needed anything, if everything was all right. That may well have been whitefish salad. Could have been tuna, but whitefish salad is common among my peeps. Boron |
The latest Dead Spread A++ (No dessert?)
Great description of the spread, Barb, but one line really bothers me:
> I think there was a dessert table but I didn't see it. Didn't SEE it? Did you LOOK for it? Did you ASK? We need an explanation. Felice |
The latest Dead Spread A++
In article >,
Boron Elgar > wrote: (comment about tuna salad deleted) > That may well have been whitefish salad. Could have been tuna, but > whitefish salad is common among my peeps. > > Boron OK, thanks. My recollection is that it didn't taste tuna-y. -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On 27 Jan 2006 23:31:01 -0600, Bob Terwilliger wrote:
> Barb wrote: > > > The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy > > dish - it had potatoes in it > > Might that have been potato kugel? Here's a typical recipe: > > > Potato Kugel > <snippity snip> So that's what a kugel is? it's a big, oven baked latke? I like latke, I like fritatta... so I'll like kugel! Thanks for the recipe. -- Practice safe eating. Always use condiments. |
The latest Dead Spread A++
Melba's Jammin' wrote:
> > The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy > dish - it had potatoes in it; a beautiful fruit plate with cantaloupe, > whole strawberries, honeydew, and grapes; scalloped pineapple (I think); > tuna salad; mixed breads; lox with onion, tomatoes, and cucumbers. The > synagogue is bright and new and their social area is in the front of the > building at the main entrance. The tables were appointed with cloths > and stemmed glasses with cloth napkins artfully folded and tucked in > each glass. I think there was a dessert table but I didn't see it. > > Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. -- Cheers Cathy(xyz) |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 09:05:50 -0800, sf >
wrote: >On 27 Jan 2006 23:31:01 -0600, Bob Terwilliger wrote: > >> Barb wrote: >> >> > The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy >> > dish - it had potatoes in it >> >> Might that have been potato kugel? Here's a typical recipe: >> >> >> Potato Kugel >> ><snippity snip> > >So that's what a kugel is? it's a big, oven baked latke? I like >latke, I like fritatta... so I'll like kugel! Thanks for the recipe. Kugel can be made with potato, rice, noodles or matzoh...you take a carb and mix it with egg, fat or fats (butter, schmaltz, oil, cheese, cottage cheese, sour cream, etc) depending on it being a dairy or meat meal) and then jazz it to sweet or savory, depending on what you want. I was always of the idea that kugel meant pudding. Boron |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 19:29:46 +0200, cathyxyz wrote:
> Melba's Jammin' wrote: > > > > > The Dead Spread: <snip> > > > > Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. > > Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this > talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of > Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. You've never been to a gathering (featuring food and drink) hosted by the family after a funeral? To me, Barb's "Dead Spread" (I'm assuming she made up the term) is the Jewish version of an Irish wake. I'll put on my own version someday too. :) Life goes on after you're gone; so why not have one last party as your send off? -- Practice safe eating. Always use condiments. |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 19:29:46 +0200, cathyxyz
> wrote: >Melba's Jammin' wrote: > >> >> The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy >> dish - it had potatoes in it; a beautiful fruit plate with cantaloupe, >> whole strawberries, honeydew, and grapes; scalloped pineapple (I think); >> tuna salad; mixed breads; lox with onion, tomatoes, and cucumbers. The >> synagogue is bright and new and their social area is in the front of the >> building at the main entrance. The tables were appointed with cloths >> and stemmed glasses with cloth napkins artfully folded and tucked in >> each glass. I think there was a dessert table but I didn't see it. >> >> Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. > >Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this >talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of >Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. It is a chance for family and friends to relax and talk. Maybe recollections about the deceased or just a chance to see and talk to people you have not seen in a long time. Families are so spread out that it seems to take a funeral to get them together. -- Susan N. "Moral indignation is in most cases two percent moral, 48 percent indignation, and 50 percent envy." Vittorio De Sica, Italian movie director (1901-1974 |
The latest Dead Spread A++
In article >,
cathyxyz > wrote: >Melba's Jammin' wrote: > >> >> The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy >> dish - it had potatoes in it; a beautiful fruit plate with cantaloupe, >> whole strawberries, honeydew, and grapes; scalloped pineapple (I think); >> tuna salad; mixed breads; lox with onion, tomatoes, and cucumbers. The >> synagogue is bright and new and their social area is in the front of the >> building at the main entrance. The tables were appointed with cloths >> and stemmed glasses with cloth napkins artfully folded and tucked in >> each glass. I think there was a dessert table but I didn't see it. >> >> Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. May her memory be eternal! Barb, I very sorry to hear of your recent losses. >Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this >talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of >Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. Mileage on this definitely varies. As one of the church ladies in the kitchen, the phrase makes me snort coffee out my nose. It is, indeed, a fact of life that the Dear Departed won't be around for the funeral reception. I have been comforted in my mourning times to think that the DD had a sendoff lunch s/he would have enjoyed, had s/he been still eating with us. (After reading "Being Dead is No Excuse", I almost want to move to the South. They know how to do funeral receptions.) Charlotte http://loveandcooking.blogspot.com -- |
The latest Dead Spread A++
cathyxyz wrote:
> > Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this > talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of > Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. > No way... if and when I go I WANT to know people to enjoyed a meal and perhaps memories of me. I like food and I like to cook... lemme send them off well fed while they send me off. |
Dead Spreads was The latest Dead Spread A++
cathyxyz wrote:
> Melba's Jammin' wrote: > >> >> The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy >> dish - it had potatoes in it; a beautiful fruit plate with cantaloupe, >> whole strawberries, honeydew, and grapes; scalloped pineapple (I >> think); tuna salad; mixed breads; lox with onion, tomatoes, and >> cucumbers. The synagogue is bright and new and their social area is >> in the front of the building at the main entrance. The tables were >> appointed with cloths and stemmed glasses with cloth napkins artfully >> folded and tucked in each glass. I think there was a dessert table >> but I didn't see it. >> Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. > > > Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this > talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of > Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. > While it might seem ghoulish, it does serve a purpose. Out of the pain and sadness comes a little good. The guest of honour is there just in another form. Here's my feeling on the topic. Dead spreads happen and some are betteve all thoses spices, herbs, sauces, and goodies to? I wonder if this has ever been written into a will. Dear Cousin Betsy gets all of my hot sauce collection while Uncle Buck get my one of a kind vinegar collection. Now this could really be interesting! I might just have to specify a menu in the event of my demise. I've already decided against that open coffin thing. I don't wear make-up now and haven't since being alive so I'll be darned if I'll wear it then. I want a party so they had best give it to me ;) I think I want a nice band or at least up beat music. I have a list of my favourite songs I'd like played, non of the hymns outside of the actual service. I wouldn't mind having foodnetwork set up during the reception. I want nice, hearty sandwiches not those little fussy things. I would like the fussy fancy cut garnishes, lots of cheese, and lots of vegetables. DH rolled his eyes when I said a steak bbq would be in order. I'd rather have steak than sandwiches anyway! The food must be healthy and I want a dessert even though I don't like desserts myself. The dessert will be in tribute to my family who likely would have liked more of it but didn't get it. I think cheescake would be suitable. I'd like an ice scuplture too just because they are pretty. I'd like sparklers for the kids or kids at heart and fireworks afterwards. I can tell you, my dead spread is going to be so non-conformist and that is just the way I want it! |
The latest Dead Spread A++ (No dessert?)
In article >,
"Felice Friese" > wrote: > Great description of the spread, Barb, but one line really bothers me: > > > I think there was a dessert table but I didn't see it. > > Didn't SEE it? Did you LOOK for it? Did you ASK? We need an explanation. > > Felice LOL! First off, I was busy trying to observe protocol and stuff -- I haven't been in a synagogue for a service since Harriet Schwartz married Ben Kaufman, I think -- 40 years. And I've never attended a Jewish memorial service. Margaret's been coaching me, but this was a Reformed congregation and things didn't go the way she'd prepped me for. :-) I didn't want them looking at me funny if I stomped my foot and said, "What!? No dessert?" AND, I wound up at the table with Barb's classmates from school. I was surprised that I was the only one from my class there and was doubly glad I went, for Mimi's sake. Got to jawing with those folks and dessert never entered my mind. I'm slipping. "-) -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet |
The latest Dead Spread A++
cathyxyz wrote:
> Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this > talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of > Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. Thinking about it this way may help: People who are grieving shouldn't have to think about the day to day mundane problems of preparing food. They may be so distraught that they don't want to eat. Loving friends bring food so that the immediate family doesn't have to prepare it, and they lovingly encourage the grieving family to eat regular meals so they can keep their health up at a time when that's the last thing on their minds. Here's what I think is ghoulish: The grieving family has enough on their minds, but they're still expected to cater a huge party for a bunch of so-called friends who know where to find a big spread of food. They say a few words about how sorry they are, then enjoy cocktails and cake. I'll leave it up to you to decide where the line is drawn between the first and the second. --Lia |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sat, 28 Jan 2006, Julia Altshuler wrote: > cathyxyz wrote: > > > Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this > > talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of > > Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. > > > Thinking about it this way may help: People who are grieving shouldn't > have to think about the day to day mundane problems of preparing food. > They may be so distraught that they don't want to eat. Loving friends > bring food so that the immediate family doesn't have to prepare it, and > they lovingly encourage the grieving family to eat regular meals so they > can keep their health up at a time when that's the last thing on their > minds. > > --Lia Yes, this is absolutely true. This has been one of those customs in the South forever. Back in the "olden days" people tended to have big families. Having Eight or ten kids wasn't unusual. A grieving mother wasn't in any condition to cook and if the mother was the DD then the family needed the help. As was the custom of the day, the DD was "laid out in the parlor" and friends and relatives came to pay their respects. There was also the custom of "sitting up with the dead" so that many took the night shift in order that the DD was not alone. As well, many of these people traveled a long way by horse and wagon (six miles round trip was the average "day's travel") and were on the property for several days and needed to be fed. Usually the burial was nearby and the attendees would come back to the house of the DD. People would be fed before starting the trip home. As time progressed, family members would come "home" and the DD house would be full of people for days since burial could be delayed by emblaming. Friends didn't want the family members to have to worry about cooking. It is still the custom here for family and close friends to go back to the DD's house (or the house designated for the DD) after the funeral. I see the "Dead Spread" moniker as one to lighten the subject matter and to focus on the food side instead of the grief side. I don't think anyone is making light of death. Elaine, too |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sat 28 Jan 2006 07:16:03p, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it Elaine
Parrish? > > On Sat, 28 Jan 2006, Julia Altshuler wrote: > >> cathyxyz wrote: >> >> > Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this >> > talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest >> > of Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. >> >> >> Thinking about it this way may help: People who are grieving shouldn't >> have to think about the day to day mundane problems of preparing food. >> They may be so distraught that they don't want to eat. Loving friends >> bring food so that the immediate family doesn't have to prepare it, and >> they lovingly encourage the grieving family to eat regular meals so >> they can keep their health up at a time when that's the last thing on >> their minds. >> >> --Lia > > Yes, this is absolutely true. This has been one of those customs in the > South forever. > > Back in the "olden days" people tended to have big families. Having > Eight or ten kids wasn't unusual. A grieving mother wasn't in any > condition to cook and if the mother was the DD then the family needed > the help. > > As was the custom of the day, the DD was "laid out in the parlor" and > friends and relatives came to pay their respects. There was also the > custom of "sitting up with the dead" so that many took the night shift > in order that the DD was not alone. As well, many of these people > traveled a long way by horse and wagon (six miles round trip was the > average "day's travel") and were on the property for several days and > needed to be fed. Usually the burial was nearby and the attendees would > come back to the house of the DD. People would be fed before starting > the trip home. > > As time progressed, family members would come "home" and the DD house > would be full of people for days since burial could be delayed by > emblaming. Friends didn't want the family members to have to worry about > cooking. It is still the custom here for family and close friends to go > back to the DD's house (or the house designated for the DD) after the > funeral. > > I see the "Dead Spread" moniker as one to lighten the subject matter and > to focus on the food side instead of the grief side. I don't think > anyone is making light of death. Exactly so. I remember clearly when my grandfather died. I was seven years old. My grandparents lived in rural MS. He was "laid out in the parlor", as was typical of that day. I have never seen so much food, all homemade by neighbors, friends, and family, and never so many people in one house in my life, even to this day. I remember, too, that it was the first time I had ever seen or eaten egg custard pie. It is still one of my favorites, and always reminds me of my grandfather. -- Wayne Boatwright o¿o ____________________ BIOYA |
The latest Dead Spread A++
> On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 19:29:46 +0200, cathyxyz wrote: > >> Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this >> talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of >> Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. Yes, it is a bit ghoulish, and one of the ways we humans cope with our mortality is to make traditions and some macabre humor. I've been singing songs of my childhood to my preschooler. Last night we were sawing away on "have you seen the ghost of Tom? Long white bones with the flesh all gone". It is a classic human attempt to take the stink out of the skunk. blacksalt who has a Greek quote up in her bathroom: Death is nothing to us, for when we are, it has not come; when it has come, we are not. |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On 29 Jan 2006 03:52:59 +0100, Wayne Boatwright
<wayneboatwright_at_gmail.com> wrote: >Exactly so. I remember clearly when my grandfather died. I was seven >years old. My grandparents lived in rural MS. He was "laid out in the >parlor", as was typical of that day. I have never seen so much food, all >homemade by neighbors, friends, and family, and never so many people in >one house in my life, even to this day. I remember, too, that it was the >first time I had ever seen or eaten egg custard pie. It is still one of >my favorites, and always reminds me of my grandfather. my gawd Wayne, your post flashed me back to three years old when I traveled to my Great Grandfather's funeral in rural North Carolina. They had him layed out on display in one of the bedrooms of the house and there were lots of people milling around the house. I especially remember wandering through the kitchen, past the "wood stove" where someone was cooking and raising lids over the burner area with flames jumping out of that stove. My Great Grandmother was used to turning out huge meals of country ham, scrambled eggs, grits, bisquits and red eye gravy for her huge family of eight kids. Bill |
The latest Dead Spread A++
kalanamak wrote:
> >> On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 19:29:46 +0200, cathyxyz wrote: >> > >>> Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this >>> talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest >>> of Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. > > > Yes, it is a bit ghoulish, and one of the ways we humans cope with our > mortality is to make traditions and some macabre humor. I've been > singing songs of my childhood to my preschooler. Last night we were > sawing away on "have you seen the ghost of Tom? Long white bones with > the flesh all gone". It is a classic human attempt to take the stink out > of the skunk. > blacksalt > who has a Greek quote up in her bathroom: Death is nothing to us, for > when we are, it has not come; when it has come, we are not. Yes, and for those who have religious beliefs it is a celebration that their family member/friend has passed on to a better place. |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Fri, 27 Jan 2006 20:25:22 -0600, Melba's Jammin'
> connected the dots and wrote: ~I think I'm gonna try to be a Jew when I die so I can have a Dead Spread ~at least as good as today's. You'd be welcomed to the Tribe. Before you die, you could have your bat mitzva. Now _there's_ an occasion for a fancy meal! ~The Dead Spread: Something on the order of a frittata or baked eggy ~dish - it had potatoes in it; a beautiful fruit plate with cantaloupe, ~whole strawberries, honeydew, and grapes; scalloped pineapple (I think); ~tuna salad; mixed breads; lox with onion, tomatoes, and cucumbers. The ~synagogue is bright and new and their social area is in the front of the ~building at the main entrance. The tables were appointed with cloths ~and stemmed glasses with cloth napkins artfully folded and tucked in ~each glass. I think there was a dessert table but I didn't see it. That sounds like a Minnie-soda thang. Here, even with the rich relatives, it's been deli, with friends bringing or cooking up kugels and deli. And yeah, there are usually sweets. Just make sure you wash your hands from the pitcher outside the door before you walk back in. Tradition. ~Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. I suggest telling the rest of your friends to put off their deaths for a while. A woman can only lose so many folks before she goes bonkers, and you sound like you're at your limit. Condolences to you and her family. maxine |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 07:54:27 -0600, Melba's Jammin'
> connected the dots and wrote: ~In article >, ~ "Bob Terwilliger" > wrote: ~> Potato Kugel ~> ~> 6 medium potatoes ~> 3 eggs, beaten ~> 3/4 C flour (+-) ~> 1 onion ~> 1/2 tsp. salt ~> dash of white pepper ~> 4 tbsp. shortening ~> ~> Preheat oven to 375°F. Peel potatoes and grate them finely. Squeeze out ~> excess liquid. Grate onions into the potato pulp. Add beaten eggs, salt and ~> enough flour to make a batter that will drop from a spoon. Melt shortening ~> and then fold into the batter. Pour the batter into a greased 9-inch square ~> baking pan. Bake 30-40 minutes until nicely browned and crisp at the edges. ~> May be served with Applesauce. ~> ~> ~> Bob ~ ~This was not like that. If I'd seen one other camera out I would have ~taken a picture. What I ate had sliced potato in it. What kind of ~struck me is that the two dishes - the pineapple one being the other - ~were rather similar in appearance -- both having that eggy custardy look. ~ ~Question re the kugel above: I don't have a box grater like my mom had. ~When I make potato pancakes I shred them finely in the fp then chop the ~shreds with the steel blade, creating the kind of potato mush that ~you're describing -- any clue if what I'm doing results in a substantial ~difference from grating the whole potatoes? I've always used a wire grater (looks sort of like a rectangular badminton racket). Folks on the jewish-food list suggest grating them in the FP, then running about half of the gratings through the processor for a similar effect. They both sound like kugels, which are basically a pudding type of food, sometimes with noodles (lukshun kugels), sometimes with chunks of main ingredient. For approximately a gazillion varieties, check out <www.jewishfood-list.com> archive. I don't think there's one for beets.... maxine in ri |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sun, 29 Jan 2006 09:12:35 +0200, cathyxyz
> connected the dots and wrote: ~Julia Altshuler wrote: ~ ~> Thinking about it this way may help: People who are grieving shouldn't ~> have to think about the day to day mundane problems of preparing food. ~> They may be so distraught that they don't want to eat. Loving friends ~> bring food so that the immediate family doesn't have to prepare it, and ~> they lovingly encourage the grieving family to eat regular meals so they ~> can keep their health up at a time when that's the last thing on their ~> minds. ~> ~> ~> Here's what I think is ghoulish: The grieving family has enough on ~> their minds, but they're still expected to cater a huge party for a ~> bunch of so-called friends who know where to find a big spread of food. ~> They say a few words about how sorry they are, then enjoy cocktails and ~> cake. ~> ~> ~> I'll leave it up to you to decide where the line is drawn between the ~> first and the second. ~ ~I have read the comments about this here, and will add this: ~ ~I have attended a few funerals in my time and there has indeed been food ~and drink served at the "wake". However, after the service, I did not go ~to all my other friends and say "Wow, what great food they had at that ~funeral!." I don't even remember what they served at the last one I went ~to - it was for a young boy of 18 who had been killed by a drunk driver. ~All I remember is the incredible grief. That's what I find ghoulish. And ~IMHO, no matter how one dies it is ALWAYS a terrible thing for the ones ~left behind. I know that having a wake or whatever you want to call it ~is traditional in most religions; I don't have a problem with that - but ~I still feel that discussing the food served afterward, with strangers - ~who never even knew the deceased, is not something I can bring myself to do. Ah. It's an anthropological view of the proceedings. There's enough grief over the departed that sometimes you have to take a step back and see something else besides that. The few after-burial meals I've been to are usually done at catering halls that serve finger sandwiches with various salads, chips, coffee and other liquids, and desserts, none of which are memorable. I've had the same thing served at teas and lunch meetings. The food helps to loosen people up so they don't just stand there and say "sorry for your loss." It gives them a chance to take the time and share a story about the DD. It keeps the family occupied with the living for a while. I find the luncheons to be kind of weird (the family has just lost a loved one, they've paid a heap of cash to the funeral home, and now they have to buy food for all the visitors?). Most of my family and co-religionists may order a deli platter and rolls, but friends are the ones who operate the kitchen and keep the food coming, most of it home made. maxine in ri |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 19:29:46 +0200, cathyxyz
> connected the dots and wrote: ~ ~Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this ~talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest of ~Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. It's a sharing of food and memories of the departed, so the left-behinds don't go straight from the graveyard to the house alone with the sounds of the grave being filled in as their last memory. I think Barb's description of them is an interesting way to deal with the rash of friends and family she's lost recently. May their memories be for a blessing maxine in ri |
The latest Dead Spread A++
In article >,
maxine in ri > wrote: > On Fri, 27 Jan 2006 20:25:22 -0600, Melba's Jammin' > > connected the dots and wrote: > > ~I think I'm gonna try to be a Jew when I die so I can have a Dead > Spread ~at least as good as today's. > You'd be welcomed to the Tribe. Before you die, you could have your > bat mitzva. Now _there's_ an occasion for a fancy meal! Heh! Margaret doesn't give me a chance for conversion. I know it's not easily done. Re the bat mitzvah spread -- I'm remembering my friend Harriet's party. My recollection is that the word was that Minnie's (her mom) word to the caterers was that the tables had better look as full at the end of the meal as at the beginning. (snip) > napkins artfully folded and tucked in ~each glass. I think there was > a dessert table but I didn't see it. > That sounds like a Minnie-soda thang. Here, even with the rich > relatives, it's been deli, with friends bringing or cooking up kugels > and deli. And yeah, there are usually sweets. > > Just make sure you wash your hands from the pitcher outside the door > before you walk back in. Tradition. Got it. BTW, I checked with Mimi - she said the potato thing was probably a kugel but she was fairly oblivious to it all. No doubt. > ~Enough already. Rest in peace, Barbie. > > I suggest telling the rest of your friends to put off their deaths for > a while. A woman can only lose so many folks before she goes bonkers, > and you sound like you're at your limit. I've been burying people since my dad died when I was 6 years old. It's the hazard of a large family, I suppose. There's usually been some -- more -- time between, though. This run has been just plain unnatural! > Condolences to you and her family. Yeah - thanks, Maxine. Like I said, she wasn't my friend - her sister is. Hard to lose a sib you're close to and especially one so untimely 8-( The three were each a year apart in school. <sigh> OB Comfort food.: { Exported from MasterCook Mac } Marshmallow Krispie Treats Recipe By: Posted to rec.food.cooking by Barb Schaller 1-29-2006 Serving Size: 1 Preparation Time: 0:00 Categories: Bars Amount Measure Ingredient Preparation Method 1/4 cup butter 7 oz. marshmallows (40 large or 3 cups (7 to 10) miniature) 5 cups Rice Krispies cereal (5 to 6) Melt butter in 3-quart saucepan. Add marshmallows and cook over low heat, stirring until marshmallows are melted and mix is well blended. Remove from heat. Add Rice Krispies and stir until well-=coated. Press warm mixture firmly into buttered 9x13" pan. Cut into squares when cool. Yield: 24 2" squares. ---------- Notes: Source: Kellogg's Rice Krispies cereal box, May, 1966. -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet |
The latest Dead Spread A++ with a recipe included
In article >,
maxine in ri > wrote: > On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 19:29:46 +0200, cathyxyz > > connected the dots and wrote: > > ~ > ~Regardless of religion, or the quality of the food, I think all this > ~talk about "Dead Spreads" is a bit ghoulish, considering the "Guest > of ~Honor" is no longer around to enjoy it. :-) > It's a sharing of food and memories of the departed, so the > left-behinds don't go straight from the graveyard to the house alone > with the sounds of the grave being filled in as their last memory. > > I think Barb's description of them is an interesting way to deal with > the rash of friends and family she's lost recently. Hey, everybody's got a specialty. "-) And at least the discussion is about FOOD! Here's a great recipe from my friend Harla's Dead Spread a few years ago. Now THERE was a woman!! My Bridge partner. And I guarantee she was present for the party! > May their memories be for a blessing > maxine in ri Maxine, do you have any idea what the words closing the service might be? Reform congregation -- and I'm blanking out on all of it right now. I wrote the Rabbi and asked. Hope to hear in a coupla days. { Exported from MasterCook Mac } Salted Nut Roll Bars Recipe By: Posted to rec.food.cooking by Barb Schaller, 1-29-2006 Serving Size: 1 Preparation Time: 0:00 Categories: Bars Amount Measure Ingredient Preparation Method 16 ounces jar peanuts 1 tb margarine 1 large bag Reese's Peanut butter chips 1 can sweetened condensed milk 1/2 bag miniature marshmallows Spray nonstick Pam on a 9 x 13 pan. In bottom of the pan, put 1/2 of the jar of peanuts. Melt margarine and chips over low heat and add milk, then marshmallow. Don't melt the marshmallows, just let them get soft. Pour this over the peanuts. Spread out and pour the rest of the peanuts on top. Press them down a bit. Pat out and refrigerate 1-2 hours before cutting. Enjoy! Pretty simple and they are yummy! Terrie Schmidt ---------- Notes: Served at Harla's funeral, March 2002. _____ -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet |
The latest Dead Spread A++
In article >,
maxine in ri > wrote: > On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 07:54:27 -0600, Melba's Jammin' > > connected the dots and wrote: (snippage) > eggy custardy look. ~ ~Question re the kugel above: I don't have a > box grater like my mom had. ~When I make potato pancakes I shred > them finely in the fp then chop the ~shreds with the steel blade, > creating the kind of potato mush that ~you're describing -- any clue > if what I'm doing results in a substantial ~difference from grating > the whole potatoes? > > I've always used a wire grater (looks sort of like a rectangular > badminton racket). Folks on the jewish-food list suggest grating them > in the FP, then running about half of the gratings through the > processor for a similar effect. I think Mom used a wire grater -- and I have a memory here of Kay Hartman reporting on her Aunt Irene's use of such a grater. I'm glad that my food processor plan is shared by others. > > They both sound like kugels, which are basically a pudding type of > food, sometimes with noodles (lukshun kugels), sometimes with chunks > of main ingredient. For approximately a gazillion varieties, check > out <www.jewishfood-list.com> archive. I don't think there's one for > beets.... > > maxine in ri So, would the one with the pineapple have been a kugel, too? "Chunks of main ingredient" fits with both these. Beet Kugel. Now, THERE's an abomination in Alex's sight! :-) -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sun, 29 Jan 2006 18:00:26 -0600, Melba's Jammin'
> connected the dots and wrote: ~In article >, ~ maxine in ri > wrote: ~ ~> On Sat, 28 Jan 2006 07:54:27 -0600, Melba's Jammin' ~> > connected the dots and wrote: ~(snippage) ~ ~> eggy custardy look. ~ ~Question re the kugel above: I don't have a ~> box grater like my mom had. ~When I make potato pancakes I shred ~> them finely in the fp then chop the ~shreds with the steel blade, ~> creating the kind of potato mush that ~you're describing -- any clue ~> if what I'm doing results in a substantial ~difference from grating ~> the whole potatoes? ~ ~> ~> I've always used a wire grater (looks sort of like a rectangular ~> badminton racket). Folks on the jewish-food list suggest grating them ~> in the FP, then running about half of the gratings through the ~> processor for a similar effect. ~ ~I think Mom used a wire grater -- and I have a memory here of Kay ~Hartman reporting on her Aunt Irene's use of such a grater. I'm glad ~that my food processor plan is shared by others. ~> ~> They both sound like kugels, which are basically a pudding type of ~> food, sometimes with noodles (lukshun kugels), sometimes with chunks ~> of main ingredient. For approximately a gazillion varieties, check ~> out <www.jewishfood-list.com> archive. I don't think there's one for ~> beets.... ~> ~> maxine in ri ~ ~So, would the one with the pineapple have been a kugel, too? "Chunks of ~main ingredient" fits with both these. Beet Kugel. Now, THERE's an ~abomination in Alex's sight! :-) When Bubba Vic comes to visit, you can make him one all for himself<G>. And yeah, fruit kugels are pretty common. maxine in ri, hoping that I can get these posts out timely |
The latest Dead Spread A++
In article >,
cathyxyz > wrote: > I have attended a few funerals in my time and there has indeed been food > and drink served at the "wake". However, after the service, I did not go > to all my other friends and say "Wow, what great food they had at that > funeral!." I don't even remember what they served at the last one I went > to - it was for a young boy of 18 who had been killed by a drunk driver. > All I remember is the incredible grief. That's what I find ghoulish. And > IMHO, no matter how one dies it is ALWAYS a terrible thing for the ones > left behind. I know that having a wake or whatever you want to call it > is traditional in most religions; I don't have a problem with that - but > I still feel that discussing the food served afterward, with strangers - > who never even knew the deceased, is not something I can bring myself to do. I guess I disagree. I've not been to many funerals, only two, but they were celebrations of the life that had passed. People told jokes, sang songs, as well as telling touching stories and participating in the religious rituals. I sadly never met my husband's maternal grandmother, but I heard that her funeral was a riot. Their family was big on teasing and joking and all came to celebrate the lovely and funny woman she was. Part of it is that almost everyone I know close enough to mourn with comes from a religious background of some sort in which there is a hope that the person went on to a better place, and so it is us who are missing them that is sad, not that they are dead. Regards, Ranee (who wants a great spread at her wake, and all sorts of fun) Remove do not & spam to e-mail me. "She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands." Prov 31:13 http://arabianknits.blogspot.com/ http://talesfromthekitchen.blogspot.com/ |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Sun 29 Jan 2006 12:12:35a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it cathyxyz?
> I have attended a few funerals in my time and there has indeed been food > and drink served at the "wake". However, after the service, I did not go > to all my other friends and say "Wow, what great food they had at that > funeral!." I don't even remember what they served at the last one I went > to - it was for a young boy of 18 who had been killed by a drunk driver. > All I remember is the incredible grief. That's what I find ghoulish. And > IMHO, no matter how one dies it is ALWAYS a terrible thing for the ones > left behind. I know that having a wake or whatever you want to call it > is traditional in most religions; I don't have a problem with that - but > I still feel that discussing the food served afterward, with strangers - > who never even knew the deceased, is not something I can bring myself to > do. I agree with you Cathy. Never until reading it here have I heard of people going to a funeral anticipating what kind of food was going to be served, much less writing a review of it afterward, and even comparing it to a host of other funeral meals they've had. I guess if you read Usenet long enough, you'll eventually hear everything. :-) -- Wayne Boatwright Õ¿Õ¬ ________________________________________ Okay, okay, I take it back! UnScrew you! |
The latest Dead Spread A++
"Wayne Boatwright" <wayneboatwright_at_gmail.com> wrote in message
28.19... > On Sun 29 Jan 2006 12:12:35a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it cathyxyz? > I agree with you Cathy. Never until reading it here have I heard of people > going to a funeral anticipating what kind of food was going to be served, > much less writing a review of it afterward, and even comparing it to a host > of other funeral meals they've had. I guess if you read Usenet long > enough, you'll eventually hear everything. :-) Keep in mind, I've got a sick, twisted sense of humor...and very few sacred cows...so Barb's "Dead Spread" reviews don't seem disrespectful to me. To be honest, with Barb's interest in cooking, it seems sort of natural that she'd comment on things like that. It's sort of like amateur anthropology. Then again, I come from a family that expects certain things after the funeral...there should be ham, there should be a vegetable plate, there should be desserts...and (because our Dead Spreads are always at someone's house afterwards), there should be enough alcohol to render most of us legless. My $.02, Lisa Ann |
The latest Dead Spread A++
Wayne Boatwright wrote: > On Sun 29 Jan 2006 12:12:35a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it cathyxyz? > > > I have attended a few funerals in my time and there has indeed been food > > and drink served at the "wake". However, after the service, I did not go > > to all my other friends and say "Wow, what great food they had at that > > funeral!." I don't even remember what they served at the last one I went > > to - it was for a young boy of 18 who had been killed by a drunk driver. > > All I remember is the incredible grief. That's what I find ghoulish. And > > IMHO, no matter how one dies it is ALWAYS a terrible thing for the ones > > left behind. I know that having a wake or whatever you want to call it > > is traditional in most religions; I don't have a problem with that - but > > I still feel that discussing the food served afterward, with strangers - > > who never even knew the deceased, is not something I can bring myself to > > do. > > I agree with you Cathy. Never until reading it here have I heard of people > going to a funeral anticipating what kind of food was going to be served, > much less writing a review of it afterward, and even comparing it to a host > of other funeral meals they've had. I guess if you read Usenet long > enough, you'll eventually hear everything. :-) Back in the early 80s this guy who I didn't know well, but had drank beer with a few times on the Riverfront in downtown St. Louis died after falling down an elevator shaft at a warehouse where there was an illegal party going on. I had gotten a ride to a party on Saturday, and unbeknownst to me, everyone else at the party had planned on going to the funeral the next day. As a rule, I don't do funerals because corpses but I had no other choice unless I wanted to spend a shitload on a cab. The funeral was bizzarre because Mike and his brother* were the only African Americans in the StL Punk scene, and the pallbearers were mostly White guys with big, green Mohawks and such, and the pews were a mix of Black folks in their Sunday finest and punk rockers dressed, well, like punk rockers. In the "Order of Service" pamphlet there was a thing that said "The Viewing of the Remains." Me and my two buddies were trying really hard not to crack up about that because the last thing we wanted to do was be disrespectful. Eventually it got to that part of the service, and we just let people squeeze by us to go up there to "view the remains." It became much more challenging when the minister looked right at the three of us and said, reaching out and up with his arms, "Everybody view the remains," then when he noticed we weren't budging he added, "If you wants to." It took all each of us had not to just lose it, but we all manged. On the way to the wake I was starved and I was trying to get my buddy to stop and at least go through the drivethrough at Popeye's. I was practically begging him, but he wouldn't stop. Then I remembered it was an African American wake, and figured that it was pretty well certain I'd be served fried chicken. I wasn't disappointed. * A couple years later the guy's brother put out my wife's hair that had caught on fire. The rest of the wussyass punk rockers just backed away, but Marcus without hesitation grabbed her hair and put it out. This was about a year before I met her. > > -- > Wayne Boatwright --Bryan |
The latest Dead Spread A++
On Mon 30 Jan 2006 03:58:43p, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it Lisa Ann?
> "Wayne Boatwright" <wayneboatwright_at_gmail.com> wrote in message > 28.19... >> On Sun 29 Jan 2006 12:12:35a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it >> cathyxyz? I agree with you Cathy. Never until reading it here have I >> heard of people going to a funeral anticipating what kind of food was >> going to be served, much less writing a review of it afterward, and >> even comparing it to a host of other funeral meals they've had. I >> guess if you read Usenet long enough, you'll eventually hear >> everything. :-) > > Keep in mind, I've got a sick, twisted sense of humor...and very few > sacred cows...so Barb's "Dead Spread" reviews don't seem disrespectful > to me. To be honest, with Barb's interest in cooking, it seems sort of > natural that she'd comment on things like that. It's sort of like > amateur anthropology. > > Then again, I come from a family that expects certain things after the > funeral...there should be ham, there should be a vegetable plate, there > should be desserts...and (because our Dead Spreads are always at > someone's house afterwards), there should be enough alcohol to render > most of us legless. > > My $.02, Every $.02 will be collected. :-) -- Wayne Boatwright o¿o ____________________ BIOYA |
The latest Dead Spread A++
In article > ,
"Lisa Ann" > wrote: > Keep in mind, I've got a sick, twisted sense of humor...and very few sacred > cows...so Barb's "Dead Spread" reviews don't seem disrespectful to me. To > be honest, with Barb's interest in cooking, it seems sort of natural that > she'd comment on things like that. It's sort of like amateur anthropology. Thenkyew, Lisa Ann. Thenkyew. The term Dead Spread, by the way, is from a book, Lutheran Church Basement Women by Janet Martin and Somebody Else - local folks, here in the Land of Luther. "-) And I gotta do research for my own Dead Spread -- Alex knows I won't want people to be talking about my funeral lunch the way I've talked about the ones at St. Olaf in downtown Minneapolis. <shudder> Ham is good as long as it's not rubber deli ham on dried rolls. Eeew. > Then again, I come from a family that expects certain things after the > funeral...there should be ham, there should be a vegetable plate, there > should be desserts...and (because our Dead Spreads are always at someone's > house afterwards), there should be enough alcohol to render most of us > legless. LOL! From when my sister, her husband, and daughter were killed in a plane crash 38 years ago, I have three memories: A close friend of the family calling my brother and telling my SIL that she was sending over a beef roast and a couple quarts of Jim Beam or something; sitting at the my brothers and talking about the tragedy of it all and crying. And then someone would tell a funny story about Ivan -- like when at a New Year's Eve party, he invited everyone to their house for his Swedish pancakes in the morning -- and they showed up. My sister liketa killed him! He stood at the stove and made pancakes for hours! And Mary was merciless. I come by it honestly. > > My $.02, > > Lisa Ann -- http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet |
The latest Dead Spread A++
Wayne Boatwright wrote:
> On Sun 29 Jan 2006 12:12:35a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it cathyxyz? > >> I have attended a few funerals in my time and there has indeed been food >> and drink served at the "wake". However, after the service, I did not go >> to all my other friends and say "Wow, what great food they had at that >> funeral!." I don't even remember what they served at the last one I went >> to - it was for a young boy of 18 who had been killed by a drunk driver. >> All I remember is the incredible grief. That's what I find ghoulish. And >> IMHO, no matter how one dies it is ALWAYS a terrible thing for the ones >> left behind. I know that having a wake or whatever you want to call it >> is traditional in most religions; I don't have a problem with that - but >> I still feel that discussing the food served afterward, with strangers - >> who never even knew the deceased, is not something I can bring myself to >> do. > > I agree with you Cathy. Never until reading it here have I heard of people > going to a funeral anticipating what kind of food was going to be served, > much less writing a review of it afterward, and even comparing it to a host > of other funeral meals they've had. Thanks, Wayne. Someone finally understood what I meant. I guess if you read Usenet long enough, you'll eventually hear everything. :-) Yup, a lot of BS from "big-headed" ignoramuses ;) -- Cheers Cathy(xyz) |
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