Last week we had the first 50, this week the last half of the list:

http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/1...pagemode=print

November 5 2009

100 Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do (Part 2)
By Bruce Buschel

"This is the second half of the 100 do's and don'ts from last week's post.
Again, this list is for one particular restaurant, mine, which is under
construction in Bridgehampton, N.Y., and will, with any luck, open this
spring. I realize that every deli needs a wisecracking waiter, most pizza
joints can handle heavy metal, and burgers always taste better when
delivered by a server with tattoos and tongue piercing(s).

Not even a hundred suggestions can cover all the bases, so one is grateful
for the many comments following the 50, including striking "you guys" from
the restaurant lexicon and making sure the alcohol order is taken
lickety-split. Thanks for all of the help:

51. If there is a service charge, alert your guests when you present the
bill. It's not a secret or a trick.

52. Know your menu inside and out. If you serve Balsam Farm candy-striped
beets, know something about Balsam Farm and candy-striped beets.

53. Do not let guests double-order unintentionally; remind the guest who
orders ratatouille that zucchini comes with the entree.


54. If there is a prix fixe, let guests know about it. Do not force anyone
to ask for the "special" menu.

55. Do not serve an amuse-bouche without detailing the ingredients.
Allergies are a serious matter; peanut oil can kill. (This would also be a
good time to ask if anyone has any allergies.)

56. Do not ignore a table because it is not your table. Stop, look, listen,
lend a hand. (Whether tips are pooled or not.)

57. Bring the pepper mill with the appetizer. Do not make people wait or beg
for a condiment.

58. Do not bring judgment with the ketchup. Or mustard. Or hot sauce. Or
whatever condiment is requested.

59. Do not leave place settings that are not being used.

60. Bring all the appetizers at the same time, or do not bring the
appetizers. Same with entrees and desserts.

61. Do not stand behind someone who is ordering. Make eye contact. Thank him
or her.

62. Do not fill the water glass every two minutes, or after each sip. You'll
make people nervous.

62(a). Do not let a glass sit empty for too long.

63. Never blame the chef or the busboy or the hostess or the weather for
anything that goes wrong. Just make it right.

64. Specials, spoken and printed, should always have prices.

65. Always remove used silverware and replace it with new.

66. Do not return to the guest anything that falls on the floor - be it
napkin, spoon, menu or soy sauce.

67. Never stack the plates on the table. They make a racket. Shhhhhh.

68. Do not reach across one guest to serve another.

69. If a guest is having trouble making a decision, help out. If someone
wants to know your life story, keep it short. If someone wants to meet the
chef, make an effort.

70. Never deliver a hot plate without warning the guest. And never ask a
guest to pass along that hot plate.

71. Do not race around the dining room as if there is a fire in the kitchen
or a medical emergency. (Unless there is a fire in the kitchen or a medical
emergency.)

72. Do not serve salad on a freezing cold plate; it usually advertises the
fact that it has not been freshly prepared.

73. Do not bring soup without a spoon. Few things are more frustrating than
a bowl of hot soup with no spoon.

74. Let the guests know the restaurant is out of something before the guests
read the menu and order the missing dish.

75. Do not ask if someone is finished when others are still eating that
course.

76. Do not ask if a guest is finished the very second the guest is finished.
Let guests digest, savor, reflect.

77. Do not disappear.

78. Do not ask, "Are you still working on that?" Dining is not work - until
questions like this are asked.

79. When someone orders a drink "straight up," determine if he wants it
"neat" - right out of the bottle - or chilled. Up is up, but "straight up"
is debatable.

80. Never insist that a guest settle up at the bar before sitting down;
transfer the tab.

81. Know what the bar has in stock before each meal.

82. If you drip or spill something, clean it up, replace it, offer to pay
for whatever damage you may have caused. Refrain from touching the wet spots
on the guest.

83. Ask if your guest wants his coffee with dessert or after. Same with an
after-dinner drink.

84. Do not refill a coffee cup compulsively. Ask if the guest desires a
refill.

84(a). Do not let an empty coffee cup sit too long before asking if a refill
is desired.

85. Never bring a check until someone asks for it. Then give it to the
person who asked for it.

86. If a few people signal for the check, find a neutral place on the table
to leave it.

87. Do not stop your excellent service after the check is presented or paid.

88. Do not ask if a guest needs change. Just bring the change.

89. Never patronize a guest who has a complaint or suggestion; listen, take
it seriously, address it.

90. If someone is getting agitated or effusive on a cellphone, politely
suggest he keep it down or move away from other guests.

91. If someone complains about the music, do something about it, without
upsetting the ambiance. (The music is not for the staff - it's for the
customers.)

92. Never play a radio station with commercials or news or talking of any
kind.

93. Do not play brass - no brassy Broadway songs, brass bands, marching
bands, or big bands that feature brass, except a muted flugelhorn.

94. Do not play an entire CD of any artist. If someone doesn't like
Frightened Rabbit or Michael Bublé, you have just ruined a meal.

95. Never hover long enough to make people feel they are being watched or
hurried, especially when they are figuring out the tip or signing for the
check.

96. Do not say anything after a tip - be it good, bad, indifferent - except,
"Thank you very much."

97. If a guest goes gaga over a particular dish, get the recipe for him or
her.

98. Do not wear too much makeup or jewelry. You know you have too much
jewelry when it jingles and/or draws comments.

99. Do not show frustration. Your only mission is to serve. Be patient. It
is not easy.

100. Guests, like servers, come in all packages. Show a "good table" your
appreciation with a free glass of port, a plate of biscotti or something
else management approves.

Bonus Track: As Bill Gates has said, "Your most unhappy customers are your
greatest source of learning." (Of course, Microsoft is one of the most
litigious companies in history, so one can take Mr. Gates's counsel with a
grain of salt. Gray sea salt is a nice addition to any table.) "

</>

Copyright 2009 The New York Times Company Privacy Policy NYTimes.com 620
Eighth Avenue New York, NY 10018

"Gregory Morrow" > wrote in message
...
> Last week we had the first 50, this week the last half of the list:
>
> http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/1...pagemode=print
>
> November 5 2009
>

> 60. Bring all the appetizers at the same time, or do not bring the
> appetizers. Same with entrees and desserts.
>
>>
> 78. Do not ask, "Are you still working on that?" Dining is not work -
> until
> questions like this are asked.
>
> 88. Do not ask if a guest needs change. Just bring the change.

Now you can see my pet peeves.

Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad as
bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never happed at a
fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England chain) and both came
at the same time at an Applebees just down the street from the other place.

Ed Pawlowski wrote:
> "Gregory Morrow" > wrote in message
> ...
>> Last week we had the first 50, this week the last half of the list:
>>
>> http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/1...pagemode=print
>>
>> November 5 2009
>>
>
>> 60. Bring all the appetizers at the same time, or do not bring the
>> appetizers. Same with entrees and desserts.
>>
>> 78. Do not ask, "Are you still working on that?" Dining is not work -
>> until
>> questions like this are asked.
>>
>> 88. Do not ask if a guest needs change. Just bring the change.
>
> Now you can see my pet peeves.
>
> Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad as
> bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never happed at a
> fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England chain) and both came
> at the same time at an Applebees just down the street from the other place.
>
>
Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with
or even after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.

--
Jean B.

"Jean B." > wrote in message
>>
>> Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad as
>> bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never happed at a
>> fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England chain) and both
>> came at the same time at an Applebees just down the street from the other
>> place.
> Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with or even
> after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.

If you have the time and the place is not overly crowded, we've often not
ordered our entree until the appetizer is brought to the table. Part of the
problem is our system of eating compared to a restaurant in other countries
with multi-course meals. We often demand fast service so we can get to the
movie or get on with shopping etc. If we are out with friends of a good
meal, I expect to take 2 to 3 hours. Most families on the way from work and
school are in a hurry at the local chain eatery.

Ed Pawlowski wrote:
> "Jean B." > wrote in message
>>> Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad as
>>> bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never happed at a
>>> fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England chain) and both
>>> came at the same time at an Applebees just down the street from the other
>>> place.
>> Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with or even
>> after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.
>
> If you have the time and the place is not overly crowded, we've often not
> ordered our entree until the appetizer is brought to the table. Part of the
> problem is our system of eating compared to a restaurant in other countries
> with multi-course meals. We often demand fast service so we can get to the
> movie or get on with shopping etc. If we are out with friends of a good
> meal, I expect to take 2 to 3 hours. Most families on the way from work and
> school are in a hurry at the local chain eatery.
>
>
Thanks for the suggestion. We usually have a moderate amount of
time, so having actual courses would work.

--
Jean B.

>> Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad as
>> bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never happed
>> at a fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England chain)
>> and both came at the same time at an Applebees just down the street
>> from the other place.
>>
> Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with or even
> after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.

And it is still you favourite restaurant? Perhaps you should tell your
server that you want your first course first, not second of with the second.

Dave Smith wrote:
>
>>> Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad
>>> as bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never
>>> happed at a fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England
>>> chain) and both came at the same time at an Applebees just down the
>>> street from the other place.
>>>
>> Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with or
>> even after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.
>
> And it is still you favourite restaurant? Perhaps you should tell your
> server that you want your first course first, not second of with the
> second.

It is my daughter's favorite restaurant. She likes their Japanese
curry. *I* like actually being able to go someplace without her
objecting!

--
Jean B.

In article >,
"Jean B." > wrote:

> Dave Smith wrote:
> >
> >>> Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad
> >>> as bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never
> >>> happed at a fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England
> >>> chain) and both came at the same time at an Applebees just down the
> >>> street from the other place.
> >>>
> >> Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with or
> >> even after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.
> >
> > And it is still you favourite restaurant? Perhaps you should tell your
> > server that you want your first course first, not second of with the
> > second.
>
> It is my daughter's favorite restaurant. She likes their Japanese
> curry. *I* like actually being able to go someplace without her
> objecting!

My wife and daughter have a Sunday afternoon ritual. Sunday is my
wife's work day. She runs around crazily, doing everything that she put
off or forgot. She often gets no breakfast or lunch. So she gets home
in the afternoon, and she is hungry to the to point of crankiness. So
she suggests places to eat, and my daughter vetoes them. It drives me
crazy. I made a suggestion once. They both just stared at me. This
was a place that they used to eat at, and they eat at now, but at that
point it was off their list for some unknown reason. Sometimes my
younger son participates in these deny-o-thons, but he usually works on
Sunday. So I just make myself an early lunch while my wife is at work.

--
Dan Abel
Petaluma, California USA

On Sun, 08 Nov 2009 10:28:31 -0500, "Jean B." > wrote:

>Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with
>or even after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.

You're a regular and you stand for that??? OMG.

--
I love cooking with wine.
Sometimes I even put it in the food.

"sf" > wrote in message
...
> On Sun, 08 Nov 2009 10:28:31 -0500, "Jean B." > wrote:
>
>>Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with
>>or even after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.
>
> You're a regular and you stand for that??? OMG.
>

Maybe now it is routine and they think she wants it that way. . I can hear
it in the kitchen. "This order is for Jean B so make sure the entrees are
ready along with the apps."

Ed Pawlowski wrote:
> "sf" > wrote in message
> ...
>> On Sun, 08 Nov 2009 10:28:31 -0500, "Jean B." > wrote:
>>
>>> Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with
>>> or even after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.
>> You're a regular and you stand for that??? OMG.
>>
>
> Maybe now it is routine and they think she wants it that way. . I can hear
> it in the kitchen. "This order is for Jean B so make sure the entrees are
> ready along with the apps."
>
>
No, it's merely a vagary.

--
Jean B.

sf wrote:
> On Sun, 08 Nov 2009 10:28:31 -0500, "Jean B." > wrote:
>
>> Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive with
>> or even after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.
>
> You're a regular and you stand for that??? OMG.
>
I have explained why we continue to go. Even if that weren't the
case, IMO it hardly rates an "OMG".

--
Jean B.

Jean wrote on Sun, 08 Nov 2009 10:28:31 -0500:

> Ed Pawlowski wrote:
>> "Gregory Morrow" > wrote in
>> message ...
>>> Last week we had the first 50, this week the last half of
>>> the list:
>>>
>>> http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/1...pagemode=print
>>>
>>> November 5 2009
>>>
>>> 60. Bring all the appetizers at the same time, or do not
>>> bring the appetizers. Same with entrees and desserts.
>>>
>>> 78. Do not ask, "Are you still working on that?" Dining is
>>> not work - until questions like this are asked.
>>>
>>> 88. Do not ask if a guest needs change. Just bring the
>>> change.
>>
>> Now you can see my pet peeves.
>>
>> Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad
>> as bringing the entree before the appetizer. While
>> that ha never happed at a fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99
>> (New England chain) and both came at the same time at
>> an Applebees just down the street from the other place.
> Sigh. I keep forgetting that the appetizers tend to arrive
> with or even after the entrees at our favorite restaurant.

Is it the only restaurant in town?



--

James Silverton
Potomac, Maryland

Email, with obvious alterations: not.jim.silverton.at.verizon.not

On Sun, 8 Nov 2009 07:42:26 -0500, "Ed Pawlowski" >
wrote:

>Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad as
>bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never happed at a
>fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England chain) and both came
>at the same time at an Applebees just down the street from the other place.

That's the point you tell the server you don't want the appetizer
anymore.

--
I love cooking with wine.
Sometimes I even put it in the food.

"sf" > wrote in message
news
> On Sun, 8 Nov 2009 07:42:26 -0500, "Ed Pawlowski" >
> wrote:
>
>>Bringing appetizers at different times though, is not nearly as bad as
>>bringing the entree before the appetizer. While that ha never happed at a
>>fine dining place, I had it happen in a 99 (New England chain) and both
>>came
>>at the same time at an Applebees just down the street from the other
>>place.
>
> That's the point you tell the server you don't want the appetizer
> anymore.

In the case of Applbees, the manager came to the table to apologize before
we could say anything. He gave as a dessert at NC. Fair enough for me.

On Nov 8, 12:32*am, "Gregory Morrow" >
wrote:
> Last week we had the first 50, this week the last half of the list:
>
> http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/1...ings-restauran...
>
> November 5 2009
>
> 100 Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do (Part 2)
> By Bruce Buschel
>
> "This is the second half of the 100 do's and don'ts from last week's post..
> Again, this list is for one particular restaurant, mine, which is under
> construction in Bridgehampton, N.Y., and will, with any luck, open this
> spring. I realize that every deli needs a wisecracking waiter, most pizza
> joints can handle heavy metal, and burgers always taste better when
> delivered by a server with tattoos and tongue piercing(s).
>
> Not even a hundred suggestions can cover all the bases, so one is grateful
> for the many comments following the 50, including striking "you guys" from
> the restaurant lexicon and making sure the alcohol order is taken
> lickety-split. Thanks for all of the help:
>
> 51. If there is a service charge, alert your guests when you present the
> bill. It's not a secret or a trick.
>
> 52. Know your menu inside and out. If you serve Balsam Farm candy-striped
> beets, know something about Balsam Farm and candy-striped beets.
>
> 53. Do not let guests double-order unintentionally; remind the guest who
> orders ratatouille that zucchini comes with the entree.
>
> 54. If there is a prix fixe, let guests know about it. Do not force anyone
> to ask for the "special" menu.
>
> 55. Do not serve an amuse-bouche without detailing the ingredients.
> Allergies are a serious matter; peanut oil can kill. (This would also be a
> good time to ask if anyone has any allergies.)
>
> 56. Do not ignore a table because it is not your table. Stop, look, listen,
> lend a hand. (Whether tips are pooled or not.)
>
> 57. Bring the pepper mill with the appetizer. Do not make people wait or beg
> for a condiment.
>
> 58. Do not bring judgment with the ketchup. Or mustard. Or hot sauce. Or
> whatever condiment is requested.
>
> 59. Do not leave place settings that are not being used.
>
> 60. Bring all the appetizers at the same time, or do not bring the
> appetizers. Same with entrees and desserts.
>
> 61. Do not stand behind someone who is ordering. Make eye contact. Thank him
> or her.
>
> 62. Do not fill the water glass every two minutes, or after each sip. You'll
> make people nervous.
>
> 62(a). Do not let a glass sit empty for too long.
>
> 63. Never blame the chef or the busboy or the hostess or the weather for
> anything that goes wrong. Just make it right.
>
> 64. Specials, spoken and printed, should always have prices.
>
> 65. Always remove used silverware and replace it with new.
>
> 66. Do not return to the guest anything that falls on the floor - be it
> napkin, spoon, menu or soy sauce.
>
> 67. Never stack the plates on the table. They make a racket. Shhhhhh.
>
> 68. Do not reach across one guest to serve another.
>
> 69. If a guest is having trouble making a decision, help out. If someone
> wants to know your life story, keep it short. If someone wants to meet the
> chef, make an effort.
>
> 70. Never deliver a hot plate without warning the guest. And never ask a
> guest to pass along that hot plate.
>
> 71. Do not race around the dining room as if there is a fire in the kitchen
> or a medical emergency. (Unless there is a fire in the kitchen or a medical
> emergency.)
>
> 72. Do not serve salad on a freezing cold plate; it usually advertises the
> fact that it has not been freshly prepared.
>
> 73. Do not bring soup without a spoon. Few things are more frustrating than
> a bowl of hot soup with no spoon.
>
> 74. Let the guests know the restaurant is out of something before the guests
> read the menu and order the missing dish.
>
> 75. Do not ask if someone is finished when others are still eating that
> course.
>
> 76. Do not ask if a guest is finished the very second the guest is finished.
> Let guests digest, savor, reflect.
>
> 77. Do not disappear.
>
> 78. Do not ask, "Are you still working on that?" Dining is not work - until
> questions like this are asked.
>
> 79. When someone orders a drink "straight up," determine if he wants it
> "neat" - right out of the bottle - or chilled. Up is up, but "straight up"
> is debatable.
>
> 80. Never insist that a guest settle up at the bar before sitting down;
> transfer the tab.
>
> 81. Know what the bar has in stock before each meal.
>
> 82. If you drip or spill something, clean it up, replace it, offer to pay
> for whatever damage you may have caused. Refrain from touching the wet spots
> on the guest.
>
> 83. Ask if your guest wants his coffee with dessert or after. Same with an
> after-dinner drink.
>
> 84. Do not refill a coffee cup compulsively. Ask if the guest desires a
> refill.
>
> 84(a). Do not let an empty coffee cup sit too long before asking if a refill
> is desired.
>
> 85. Never bring a check until someone asks for it. Then give it to the
> person who asked for it.
>
> 86. If a few people signal for the check, find a neutral place on the table
> to leave it.
>
> 87. Do not stop your excellent service after the check is presented or paid.
>
> 88. Do not ask if a guest needs change. Just bring the change.
>
> 89. Never patronize a guest who has a complaint or suggestion; listen, take
> it seriously, address it.
>
> 90. If someone is getting agitated or effusive on a cellphone, politely
> suggest he keep it down or move away from other guests.
>
> 91. If someone complains about the music, do something about it, without
> upsetting the ambiance. (The music is not for the staff - it's for the
> customers.)
>
> 92. Never play a radio station with commercials or news or talking of any
> kind.
>
> 93. Do not play brass - no brassy Broadway songs, brass bands, marching
> bands, or big bands that feature brass, except a muted flugelhorn.
>
> 94. Do not play an entire CD of any artist. If someone doesn't like
> Frightened Rabbit or Michael Bublé, you have just ruined a meal.
>
> 95. Never hover long enough to make people feel they are being watched or
> hurried, especially when they are figuring out the tip or signing for the
> check.
>
> 96. Do not say anything after a tip - be it good, bad, indifferent - except,
> "Thank you very much."
>
> 97. If a guest goes gaga over a particular dish, get the recipe for him or
> her.
>
> 98. Do not wear too much makeup or jewelry. You know you have too much
> jewelry when it jingles and/or draws comments.
>
> 99. Do not show frustration. Your only mission is to serve. Be patient. It
> is not easy.
>
> 100. Guests, like servers, come in all packages. Show a "good table" your
> appreciation with a free glass of port, a plate of biscotti or something
> else management approves.
>
> Bonus Track: As Bill Gates has said, "Your most unhappy customers are your
> greatest source of learning." (Of course, Microsoft is one of the most
> litigious companies in history, so one can take Mr. Gates's counsel with a
> grain of salt. Gray sea salt is a nice addition to any table.) "
>
> </>
>
> Copyright 2009 The New York Times Company Privacy Policy NYTimes.com 620
> Eighth Avenue New York, NY 10018

When you serve something and the customer says. " I asked for
(something else) ", don't say "No you didn't". I've witnessed this.
Then she dropped the bread basket from about 5 inches. Tip reflected
the above.

Not sure if mentioned, but don't clear tables when a customer is
waiting for his check or change.

TELL what comes with a meal. Asking if they want this or that makes a
customer feel awkward and cheap if he has to ask if it's extra. I
blame menu design and graphics for a lot of these misunderstandings.

On Sun, 8 Nov 2009 06:43:17 -0800 (PST), Kalmia
> wrote:

>Not sure if mentioned, but don't clear tables when a customer is
>waiting for his check or change.

Right. I hate dirty dishes on the table. Make sure the dirties are
cleared before that.

--
I love cooking with wine.
Sometimes I even put it in the food.

On Nov 8, 11:02*am, sf > wrote:
> On Sun, 8 Nov 2009 06:43:17 -0800 (PST), Kalmia
>
> > wrote:
> >Not sure if mentioned, but don't clear tables when a customer is
> >waiting for his check or change.
>
> Right. *I hate dirty dishes on the table. *Make sure the dirties are
> cleared before that.
>
> --
> I love cooking with wine.
> Sometimes I even put it in the food.

I should have been more specific. I'm tawkin about sitting there
waiting for your check, and they're off clearing OTHER tables. Sorry.

All the more reason for a busboy staff - wait people have enough to do
without clearing and setting tables. "When i run MY resto...."

Hey, a new thread!

Kalmia wrote:


> When you serve something and the customer says. " I asked for
> (something else) ", don't say "No you didn't". I've witnessed this.
> Then she dropped the bread basket from about 5 inches. Tip reflected
> the above.
>
> Not sure if mentioned, but don't clear tables when a customer is
> waiting for his check or change.

I have no problems with servers removing dirty dishes when I am finished
whatever is on them. Servers are sometimes very busy, and if they are on
their way past the table it just seems to me to be more efficient to
take them on the way by rather than having to make a special trip for them.

On Nov 8, 12:32*am, "Gregory Morrow" >
wrote:
> Last week we had the first 50, this week the last half of the list:
>
> http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/1...ings-restauran...
>
> November 5 2009
>
> 100 Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do (Part 2)
> By Bruce Buschel
>
> "This is the second half of the 100 do's and don'ts from last week's post..
> Again, this list is for one particular restaurant, mine, which is under
> construction in Bridgehampton, N.Y., and will, with any luck, open this
> spring. I realize that every deli needs a wisecracking waiter, most pizza
> joints can handle heavy metal, and burgers always taste better when
> delivered by a server with tattoos and tongue piercing(s).
>
> Not even a hundred suggestions can cover all the bases, so one is grateful
> for the many comments following the 50, including striking "you guys" from
> the restaurant lexicon and making sure the alcohol order is taken
> lickety-split. Thanks for all of the help:
>
> 51. If there is a service charge, alert your guests when you present the
> bill. It's not a secret or a trick.
>
> 52. Know your menu inside and out. If you serve Balsam Farm candy-striped
> beets, know something about Balsam Farm and candy-striped beets.
>
> 53. Do not let guests double-order unintentionally; remind the guest who
> orders ratatouille that zucchini comes with the entree.
>
> 54. If there is a prix fixe, let guests know about it. Do not force anyone
> to ask for the "special" menu.
>
> 55. Do not serve an amuse-bouche without detailing the ingredients.
> Allergies are a serious matter; peanut oil can kill. (This would also be a
> good time to ask if anyone has any allergies.)
>
> 56. Do not ignore a table because it is not your table. Stop, look, listen,
> lend a hand. (Whether tips are pooled or not.)
>
> 57. Bring the pepper mill with the appetizer. Do not make people wait or beg
> for a condiment.
>
> 58. Do not bring judgment with the ketchup. Or mustard. Or hot sauce. Or
> whatever condiment is requested.
>
> 59. Do not leave place settings that are not being used.
>
> 60. Bring all the appetizers at the same time, or do not bring the
> appetizers. Same with entrees and desserts.
>
> 61. Do not stand behind someone who is ordering. Make eye contact. Thank him
> or her.
>
> 62. Do not fill the water glass every two minutes, or after each sip. You'll
> make people nervous.
>
> 62(a). Do not let a glass sit empty for too long.
>
> 63. Never blame the chef or the busboy or the hostess or the weather for
> anything that goes wrong. Just make it right.
>
> 64. Specials, spoken and printed, should always have prices.
>
> 65. Always remove used silverware and replace it with new.
>
> 66. Do not return to the guest anything that falls on the floor - be it
> napkin, spoon, menu or soy sauce.
>
> 67. Never stack the plates on the table. They make a racket. Shhhhhh.
>
> 68. Do not reach across one guest to serve another.
>
> 69. If a guest is having trouble making a decision, help out. If someone
> wants to know your life story, keep it short. If someone wants to meet the
> chef, make an effort.
>
> 70. Never deliver a hot plate without warning the guest. And never ask a
> guest to pass along that hot plate.
>
> 71. Do not race around the dining room as if there is a fire in the kitchen
> or a medical emergency. (Unless there is a fire in the kitchen or a medical
> emergency.)
>
> 72. Do not serve salad on a freezing cold plate; it usually advertises the
> fact that it has not been freshly prepared.
>
> 73. Do not bring soup without a spoon. Few things are more frustrating than
> a bowl of hot soup with no spoon.
>
> 74. Let the guests know the restaurant is out of something before the guests
> read the menu and order the missing dish.
>
> 75. Do not ask if someone is finished when others are still eating that
> course.
>
> 76. Do not ask if a guest is finished the very second the guest is finished.
> Let guests digest, savor, reflect.
>
> 77. Do not disappear.
>
> 78. Do not ask, "Are you still working on that?" Dining is not work - until
> questions like this are asked.
>
> 79. When someone orders a drink "straight up," determine if he wants it
> "neat" - right out of the bottle - or chilled. Up is up, but "straight up"
> is debatable.
>
> 80. Never insist that a guest settle up at the bar before sitting down;
> transfer the tab.
>
> 81. Know what the bar has in stock before each meal.
>
> 82. If you drip or spill something, clean it up, replace it, offer to pay
> for whatever damage you may have caused. Refrain from touching the wet spots
> on the guest.
>
> 83. Ask if your guest wants his coffee with dessert or after. Same with an
> after-dinner drink.
>
> 84. Do not refill a coffee cup compulsively. Ask if the guest desires a
> refill.
>
> 84(a). Do not let an empty coffee cup sit too long before asking if a refill
> is desired.
>
> 85. Never bring a check until someone asks for it. Then give it to the
> person who asked for it.
>
> 86. If a few people signal for the check, find a neutral place on the table
> to leave it.
>
> 87. Do not stop your excellent service after the check is presented or paid.
>
> 88. Do not ask if a guest needs change. Just bring the change.
>
> 89. Never patronize a guest who has a complaint or suggestion; listen, take
> it seriously, address it.
>
> 90. If someone is getting agitated or effusive on a cellphone, politely
> suggest he keep it down or move away from other guests.
>
> 91. If someone complains about the music, do something about it, without
> upsetting the ambiance. (The music is not for the staff - it's for the
> customers.)
>
> 92. Never play a radio station with commercials or news or talking of any
> kind.
>
> 93. Do not play brass - no brassy Broadway songs, brass bands, marching
> bands, or big bands that feature brass, except a muted flugelhorn.
>
> 94. Do not play an entire CD of any artist. If someone doesn't like
> Frightened Rabbit or Michael Bublé, you have just ruined a meal.
>
> 95. Never hover long enough to make people feel they are being watched or
> hurried, especially when they are figuring out the tip or signing for the
> check.
>
> 96. Do not say anything after a tip - be it good, bad, indifferent - except,
> "Thank you very much."
>
> 97. If a guest goes gaga over a particular dish, get the recipe for him or
> her.
>
> 98. Do not wear too much makeup or jewelry. You know you have too much
> jewelry when it jingles and/or draws comments.
>
> 99. Do not show frustration. Your only mission is to serve. Be patient. It
> is not easy.
>
> 100. Guests, like servers, come in all packages. Show a "good table" your
> appreciation with a free glass of port, a plate of biscotti or something
> else management approves.
>
> Bonus Track: As Bill Gates has said, "Your most unhappy customers are your
> greatest source of learning." (Of course, Microsoft is one of the most
> litigious companies in history, so one can take Mr. Gates's counsel with a
> grain of salt. Gray sea salt is a nice addition to any table.) "
>
> </>
>
> Copyright 2009 The New York Times Company Privacy Policy NYTimes.com 620
> Eighth Avenue New York, NY 10018

I forgot. Don't ask what they want to drink before the rear has had a
chance to warm the chair. This seems to be the new thing. Also,
swiping dishes when yer stil chewin'.

Kalmia wrote:

> I forgot. Don't ask what they want to drink before the rear has had a
> chance to warm the chair. This seems to be the new thing. Also,
> swiping dishes when yer stil chewin'.

You know what else you forgot?

You forgot to TRIM. There's no reason to quote the ENTIRE FRICKIN POST.

Gregory Morrow wrote:
> Last week we had the first 50, this week the last half of the list:
>
> http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/1...pagemode=print

Thanks for the fun threads.

> 56. Do not ignore a table because it is not your table. Stop, look,
> listen, lend a hand. (Whether tips are pooled or not.)

That's a peeve of mine. Waiters walking by pretending to be
oblivious that you're looking for your waiter. Go get them or
ask if you can help! Maybe it's just me, that's how I worked.

> 58. Do not bring judgment with the ketchup. Or mustard. Or hot sauce.
> Or whatever condiment is requested.

Not even steak sauce??!


> 66. Do not return to the guest anything that falls on the floor - be
> it napkin, spoon, menu or soy sauce.

Duh? Is this a problem in a lot of restaurants?

> 67. Never stack the plates on the table. They make a racket. Shhhhhh.

Luckily that seems to be the domain of the diner. Where else
would I tolerate a bus boy with a big plastic tub, clattering the
dirty dishes at the empty table next to you.

> 76. Do not ask if a guest is finished the very second the guest is
> finished. Let guests digest, savor, reflect.
>
> 77. Do not disappear.

Grrr. I understand, they have things they have to do, but don't
make it longer than a minute or two.

> 78. Do not ask, "Are you still working on that?" Dining is not work -
> until questions like this are asked.

I've lost some good fries that way. Yeah, okay, I'm done.

> 80. Never insist that a guest settle up at the bar before sitting
> down; transfer the tab.

I think some places have weird laws about that, but I don't
like that I'm stuck sitting at the bar waiting for a table, then
I get stuck having to pay two tabs. Not that I ever wait for
tables anymore, but I've been there.

> 85. Never bring a check until someone asks for it. Then give it to the
> person who asked for it.

It's touchy. I agree, give it to the person who asked.

> 91. If someone complains about the music, do something about it,
> without upsetting the ambiance. (The music is not for the staff -
> it's for the customers.)

I like loud music as much as the next person, but when I'm
having trouble making my order heard over the din, it's too damned
loud. I know you were a singles bar last night, that was then.

> 97. If a guest goes gaga over a particular dish, get the recipe for
> him or her.

I don't know about that. I only asked for a recipe once and I only got
it because I was a very good customer ... even then the guy had
to figure out not-restaurant size ingredients. I don't want to be the
other table waiting for my dessert because the waiter is friggin
steaming off wine labels and procuring recipes.

nancy

Gregory Morrow wrote:
>
> Last week we had the first 50, this week the last half of the list:
>
> http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/1...pagemode=print

And the rebuttal he

http://blog.opentable.com/2009/what-...back/#comments