This is a step-by-step guide on how to break down the human body from
the full figure into serviceable choice cuts of meat. As in any field,
there are a number of methods to the practice, and you may wish to
view this as a set of suggestions rather than concrete rules. You will
notice that the carving of the larger or "commercial" cuts down into
smaller specific or "retail" cuts will be only mentioned in passing,
and not concentrated upon. Also, the use of human fat and viscera is
generally avoided, and left only to the most experimental chef. These
choices, along with recipes and serving suggestions, are nearly
infinite in variety, and we leave them to you. We've found these
guidelines to be simple and functional, but recognize that there is
always room for improvement and we welcome your suggestions.

Before getting to the main task, it must be mentioned that the
complete rendering of the human carcass requires a fairly large amount
of time, effort, and space. If the consumer does not wish to go
through the ordeal of processing and storing the bulk of the entire
animal, an easy alternative is as follows. Simply saw through one or
both legs at the points directly below the groin and a few inches
above the knee. Once skinned, these portions may then be cut into
round steaks of the carver's preferred thickness, cut into fillets,
deboned for a roast, etc. Meat for several meals is thus readily
obtained without the need for gutting and the complexities of
preparing the entire form.

The human being (also referred to throughout culinary history as "long
pig" and "hairless goat" in the case of younger specimens) is not
generally thought of as a staple food source. Observing the anatomy
and skeleton, one can see that the animal is neither built nor bred
for its meat, and as such will not provide nearly as much flesh as a
pig or cow (for example, an average 1000 pound steer breaks down to
provide 432 pounds of saleable beef). The large central pelvis and
broad shoulder blades also interfere with achieving perfect cuts.
There are advantages to this however, especially due to the fact that
the typical specimen will weigh between 100-200 pounds, easily
manipulated by one person with sufficient leverage.

Here the caution in choosing your meal must be mentioned. It is VERY
IMPORTANT to remember that animals raised for slaughter are kept in
tightly controlled environments with their health and diet carefully
maintained. Humans are not. Thus not only is the meat of each person
of varying quality, but people are also subject to an enormous range
of diseases, infections, chemical imbalances, and poisonous bad
habits, all typically increasing with age. Also as an animal ages, the
meat loses its tenderness, becoming tough and stringy. No farm animal
is ever allowed to age for thirty years. Six to thirteen months old is
a more common slaughtering point. You will obviously want a youthful
but mature physically fit human in apparently good health. A certain
amount of fat is desirable as "marbling" to add a juicy, flavorful
quality to the meat. We personally prefer firm caucasian females in
their early twenties. These are "ripe". But tastes vary, and it is a
very large herd.

The butcher will need a fairly roomy space in which to work (an
interior location is suggested), and a large table for a butcher's
block. A central overhead support will need to be chosen or installed
ahead of time to hang the carcass from. Large tubs or barrels for
blood and waste trimmings should be convenient, and a water source
close by. Most of the work can be done with a few simple tools: sharp,
clean short and long bladed knives, a cleaver or hatchet, and a
hacksaw.

Body Preparation: Acquiring your subject is up to you. For best
results and health, freshness is imperative. A living human in
captivity is optimal, but not always available. When possible make
sure the animal has no food for 48 hours, but plenty of water. This
fasting helps flush the system, purging stored toxins and bodily
wastes, as well as making bleeding and cleaning easier. Under ideal
conditions, the specimen will then be stunned into insensitivity.
Sharp unexpected blows to the head are best, tranquilizers not being
recommended as they may taint the flavor of the meat. If this is not
possible without exciting the animal and causing a struggle (which
will pump a greater volume of blood and secretions such as adrenaline
throughout the body), a single bullet through the middle of the
forehead or back of the skull will suffice.

Hanging: Once the animal is unconscious or dead, it is ready to be
hoisted. Get the feet up first, then the hands, with the head down.
This is called the "Gein configuration". Simple loops of rope may be
tied around the hands and feet and then attached to a crossbar or
overhead beam. Or, by making a cut behind the Achilles tendon, a
meathook may be inserted into each ankle for hanging support. The legs
should be spread so that the feet are outside the shoulders, with the
arms roughly parallel to the legs. This provides access to the pelvis,
and keeps the arms out of the way in a ready position for removal.
It's easiest to work if the feet are slightly above the level of the
butcher's head.

Bleeding: Place a large open vessel beneath the animal's head. With a
long-bladed knife, start at one corner of the jaw and make a deep
"ear-to-ear" cut through the neck and larynx to the opposite side.
This will sever the internal and external carotid arteries, the major
blood vessels carrying blood from the heart to the head, face, and
brain. If the animal is not yet dead, this will kill it quickly, and
allow for the blood to drain in any case. After the initial rush of
blood, the stream should be controllable and can be directed into a
receptacle. Drainage can be assisted by massaging the extremities down
in the direction of the trunk, and by compressing and releasing,
"pumping", the stomach. A mature specimen will contain almost six
liters of blood. There is no use for this fluid, unless some source is
waiting to use it immediately for ritual purposes. It acts as an
emetic in most people if drunk, and it must be mentioned here that
because of the eternal possibility of AIDS it is recommended that for
safety's sake all blood should be considered to be contaminated and
disposed of in some fashion. It is not known whether an HlV-infected
human's flesh is dangerous even if cooked, but this is another item to
consider when choosing a specimen, someone in the low-risk strata.

Beheading: When the bleeding slows, preparation for decapitation can
be started. Continue the cut to the throat around the entire neck,
from the jawline to the back of the skull. Once muscle and ligament
have been sliced away, the head can be cleanly removed by gripping it
on either side and twisting it off, separation occurring where the
spinal cord meets the skull. This is indicative of the method to be
used for dividing other bones or joints, in that the meat should
generally be cut through first with a knife, and the exposed bone then
separated with a saw or cleaver. The merits of keeping the skull as a
trophy are debatable for two principal reasons. First, a human skull
may call suspicious attention to the new owner. Secondly, thorough
cleaning is difficult due to the large brain mass, which is hard to
remove without opening the skull. The brain is not good to eat.
Removing the tongue and eyes, skinning the head, and placing it
outside in a wire cage may be effective. The cage allows small
scavengers such as ants and maggots to cleanse the flesh from the
bones, while preventing it being carried off by larger scavengers,
such as dogs and children. After a sufficient period of time, you may
retrieve the skull and boil it in a dilute bleach solution to
sterilize it and wash away any remaining tissue.

Skinning: After removing the head, wash the rest of the body down.
Because there is no major market for human hides, particular care in
removing the skin in a single piece is not necessary, and makes the
task much easier. The skin is in fact a large organ, and by flaying
the carcass you not only expose the muscular configuration, but also
get rid of the hair and the tiny distasteful glands which produce
sweat and oil. A short-bladed knife should be used to avoid slicing
into muscle and viscera. The skin is composed of two layers, an outer
thinner one with a thicker tissue layer below it. When skinning, first
score the surface, cutting lightly to be sure of depth and direction.
The diagram of the skinning pattern is an example of strip-style
skinning, dividing the surface into portions easy to handle. Reflect
the skin by lifting up and peeling back with one hand, while bringing
the knife in as flat to the skin as possible to cut away connective
tissue. The external genitals present only a small obstacle. In the
male the penis and scrotum can be pulled away from the body and
severed, in the female the outer lips skinned as the rest of the body.
It is important to leave the anus untouched at this point, and a
circle of skin should be left around it. You need not bother skinning
the hands and feet, these portions not being worth the effort unless
you plan to pickle them or use them in soup. The skin can be disposed
of, or made into fried rinds. Boil the strips and peel away the outer
layer, then cut into smaller pieces and deep-fat fry in boiling oil
until puffy and crisp. Dust with garlic salt, paprika and cayenne
pepper.

Gutting: The next major step is complete evisceration of the carcass.
To begin, make a cut from the solar plexus, the point between the
breastbone and stomach, almost to the anus. Be very careful not to cut
into the intestines, as this will contaminate the surrounding area
with bacteria and possibly feces (if this does happen, cleanse
thoroughly). A good way to avoid this is to use the knife inside the
abdominal wall, blade facing toward you, and making cautious progress.

Make a cut around the anus, or "bung", and tie it off with twine. This
also prevents contamination, keeping the body from voiding any
material left in the bowel. With a saw, cut through the pubic bone, or
"aitch". The lower body is now completely open, and you can begin to
pull the organ masses (large and small intestines, kidneys, liver,
stomach) out and cut them away from the back wall of the body.

For the upper torso, first cut through the diaphragm around the inner
surface of the carcass. This is the muscular membrane which divides
the upper, or thoracic, and the lower abdominal cavities. Remove the
breastbone, cutting down to the point on each side where it connects
to the ribs, and then sawing through and detaching it from the collar
bone. Some prefer to cut straight through the middle, depending on the
ideas you have for cuts in the final stages. The heart and lungs may
be detached and the throat cut into to remove the larynx and trachea.
Once all of the inner organs have been removed, trim away any blood
vessels or remaining pieces of connective tissue from the interior of
the carcass, and wash out thoroughly.

Remove the Arms: Actual butchering of the carcass is now ready to
begin. Cut into the armpit straight to the shoulder, and remove the
arm bone, the humerus, from the collar bone and shoulder blade. Chop
the hand off an inch or so above the wrist. Most of the meat here is
between elbow and shoulder, as the muscle groups are larger here and
due to the fact that there are two bones in the forearm. Another way
of cutting this portion is to cut away the deltoid muscle from the
upper arm near the shoulder (but leaving it attached to the trunk)
before removing the limb. This decreases the percentage of useable
meat on the arm, but allows a larger shoulder strip when excising the
shoulder blade. Purely a matter of personal preference. Cut into and
break apart the joint of the elbow, and the two halves of each arm are
now ready for carving servings from. Human flesh should always be
properly cooked before eating.

Halving the Carcass: The main body is now ready to be split. Some like
to saw straight through the spine from buttocks to neck. This leaves
the muscle fiber encasing the vertebrae on the end of the ribs. The
meat here however is tightly wrapped about the bone, and we find it
more suitable (if used at all) when boiled for soup. Thus, our
preferred method is to completely remove the entire backbone by
cutting and then sawing down either side from the tailbone on through.

Quartering the Carcass: The halves may now be taken down, unless your
preparation table or butcher block is very short. This is inadequate,
and you will have to quarter while hanging, slicing through the side
at a point of your choosing between rib cage and pelvis. Now is also
the time to begin thinking about how you would like to serve the
flesh, as this will determine the style of cuts you are about to make.
These will also be greatly affected by the muscular configuration
(physical fitness) of your specimen. First, chop the feet off at a
point about three inches up from the ankle. The bones are very thick
where the leg connects to the foot. You will want to divide the side
of meat into two further principal portions: the ribs and shoulder,
and the half-pelvis and leg. In between is the "flank" or belly, which
may be used for fillets or steaks, if thick enough, or even bacon
strips if you wish to cut this thinly. Thin and wide strips of flesh
may also be rolled, and cooked to serve as a roast. Trim away along
the edge of the ribs, and then decide whether you will cut steaks from
the flank into the thighs and rump, and carve accordingly.

Cutting the Top Quarter: Although not actually 25% of the meat you
will get, this is designated as one-fourth of the carcass as divided
into major portions. You may trim away the neck, or leave it to be
connected with the shoulder, or "chuck". The first major step with
this mass is to remove the shoulder blade and the collar bone. The
best and easiest way we have found is to just cut along the outline of
the shoulder blade, removing the meat on top and then dislocating the
large bone. To excise the collar bone make an incision along its
length and then cut and pry it away. Depending upon the development of
the breast, you may decide it qualifies as a "brisket" and remove it
before cutting the ribs. In the female the breast is composed largely
of glands and fatty tissue, and despite its appetizing appearance is
rather inedible. The ribs are the choice cut of the quarter. An
perennial favorite for barbecuing, you may divide into sections of
several ribs each and cook them as is, divide the strip in half for
shorter ribs, or even carve rib steaks if the muscle mass is
sufficient.

Cutting the Lower Quarter: This is where most of the meat is, humans
being upright animals. The muscle mass is largest in the legs and
rump. The bulk is so comparatively large here that you can do just
about anything with it. The main pieces are the buttock or rump and
the upper leg, the thigh. Our typical division is to cut the leg off
at the bottom of the buttock, then chop away the bony mass of the
knee, at places two to three inches away in either direction. Before
doing this, however, you may want to remove the whole calf muscle from
the back of the lower leg, as this is the best cut in its area. The
upper leg is now ready for anything, most especially some beautiful,
thick round steaks. The rump will have to be carved from the pelvis in
a rather triangular piece. The legs attach at the hip at a forward
point on the body, so there will be little interference as you carve
along the curve of the pelvis. Remaining meat will be on the thighs in
front of the pelvis.

And that's basically it. An average freezer provides plenty of storage
space, or you may even wish to build a simple old-fashioned smokehouse
(just like an outhouse, with a stone firepit instead of a shitter).
Offal and other waste trimmings can be disposed of in a number of
ways, burial, animal feed, and puree and flush being just a few. Bones
will dry and become brittle after being baked an oven, and can be
pulverized.
--
Rob Cypher
robcypher.livejournal.com
RABID DOG AND SLAYER OF ALT.DRUGS.HARD

MR b0Re wrote:
> This is a step-by-step guide.


Anyone needing more than twenty words to describe a fast food burger
is an imbecile.

"Guncho" > wrote in message
...
> Why would you post this?
>
>
The only reason I see it is because you responded. I immediately killfiled
him as you should too.

Jim

"Guncho" > wrote in message
...
> Why would you post this?
>

Isn't it obvious?

On Fri, 30 Nov 2007 16:23:44 -0800 (PST), Sheldon >
wrote:

>MR b0Re wrote:
>> This is a step-by-step guide.
>
>
>Anyone needing more than twenty words to describe a fast food burger
>is an imbecile.

or a fast food connoisseur

--
See return address to reply by email
remove the smiley face first

Bobo Bonobo(R) wrote:
> On Nov 30, 7:37 pm, "Bobo Bonobo(R)" > wrote:
>> On Nov 30, 6:08 pm, MR b0R rehpyC > wrote:
>>
>>
>>
>>> Beheading: When the bleeding slows, preparation for decapitation can
>>> be started. Continue the cut to the throat around the entire neck,
>>> from the jawline to the back of the skull. Once muscle and ligament
>>> have been sliced away, the head can be cleanly removed by gripping it
>>> on either side and twisting it off, separation occurring where the
>>> spinal cord meets the skull. This is indicative of the method to be
>>> used for dividing other bones or joints, in that the meat should
>>> generally be cut through first with a knife, and the exposed bone then
>>> separated with a saw or cleaver. The merits of keeping the skull as a
>>> trophy are debatable for two principal reasons. First, a human skull
>>> may call suspicious attention to the new owner. Secondly, thorough
>>> cleaning is difficult due to the large brain mass, which is hard to
>>> remove without opening the skull. The brain is not good to eat.
>>> Removing the tongue and eyes, skinning the head, and placing it
>>> outside in a wire cage may be effective. The cage allows small
>>> scavengers such as ants and maggots to cleanse the flesh from the
>>> bones, while preventing it being carried off by larger scavengers,
>>> such as dogs and children. After a sufficient period of time, you may
>>> retrieve the skull and boil it in a dilute bleach solution to
>>> sterilize it and wash away any remaining tissue.
>> Children do tend to find loose human body parts fascinating:
>>
>> http://www.redmeat.com/redmeat/2000-05-02/index.html
>
> And this one too:
> http://www.redmeat.com/redmeat/2002-09-03/index.html
>> --Bryan
>
> --Bryan

....so, a Big Mac is kosher kill, or what?

--
- Rufus

sf wrote in :

> On Fri, 30 Nov 2007 16:23:44 -0800 (PST), Sheldon >
> wrote:
>
>>MR b0Re wrote:
>>> This is a step-by-step guide.
>>
>>
>>Anyone needing more than twenty words to describe a fast food burger
>>is an imbecile.
>
> or a fast food connoisseur
>

Did you even read the post? I'm amazed at the time someone spent to type
it...

Rufus > wrote in news:hDn4j.226977$Fc.183807
@attbi_s21:

> Bobo Bonobo(R) wrote:
>> On Nov 30, 7:37 pm, "Bobo Bonobo(R)" > wrote:
>>> On Nov 30, 6:08 pm, MR b0R rehpyC > wrote:
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>> Beheading: When the bleeding slows, preparation for decapitation
can
>>>> be started. Continue the cut to the throat around the entire neck,
>>>> from the jawline to the back of the skull. Once muscle and ligament
>>>> have been sliced away, the head can be cleanly removed by gripping
it
>>>> on either side and twisting it off, separation occurring where the
>>>> spinal cord meets the skull. This is indicative of the method to be
>>>> used for dividing other bones or joints, in that the meat should
>>>> generally be cut through first with a knife, and the exposed bone
then
>>>> separated with a saw or cleaver. The merits of keeping the skull as
a
>>>> trophy are debatable for two principal reasons. First, a human
skull
>>>> may call suspicious attention to the new owner. Secondly, thorough
>>>> cleaning is difficult due to the large brain mass, which is hard to
>>>> remove without opening the skull. The brain is not good to eat.
>>>> Removing the tongue and eyes, skinning the head, and placing it
>>>> outside in a wire cage may be effective. The cage allows small
>>>> scavengers such as ants and maggots to cleanse the flesh from the
>>>> bones, while preventing it being carried off by larger scavengers,
>>>> such as dogs and children. After a sufficient period of time, you
may
>>>> retrieve the skull and boil it in a dilute bleach solution to
>>>> sterilize it and wash away any remaining tissue.
>>> Children do tend to find loose human body parts fascinating:
>>>
>>> http://www.redmeat.com/redmeat/2000-05-02/index.html
>>
>> And this one too:
>> http://www.redmeat.com/redmeat/2002-09-03/index.html
>>> --Bryan
>>
>> --Bryan
>
> ...so, a Big Mac is kosher kill, or what?
>

::beer on monitor::

{ob food} eating halvah and Israeli goat cheese 'kadurim' (means
"balls" in hebrew, heh. I'm 11.

"MR b0R rehpyC" > wrote in message
...

Massive snippage


Big Mac ......IS soylent green........Soylent Green IS........PEOPLE!!!!!
-ginny

In article >, MR b0R rehpyC
took the hamburger meat, threw it on the grill, and I said "Oh Wow"...

> This is a step-by-step guide on how to break down the human body from
> the full figure into serviceable choice cuts of meat. As in any field,
> there are a number of methods to the practice, and you may wish to
> view this as a set of suggestions rather than concrete rules. You will
> notice that the carving of the larger or "commercial" cuts down into
> smaller specific or "retail" cuts will be only mentioned in passing,
> and not concentrated upon. Also, the use of human fat and viscera is
> generally avoided, and left only to the most experimental chef. These
> choices, along with recipes and serving suggestions, are nearly
> infinite in variety, and we leave them to you. We've found these
> guidelines to be simple and functional, but recognize that there is
> always room for improvement and we welcome your suggestions.
>
> Before getting to the main task, it must be mentioned that the
> complete rendering of the human carcass requires a fairly large amount
> of time, effort, and space. If the consumer does not wish to go
> through the ordeal of processing and storing the bulk of the entire
> animal, an easy alternative is as follows. Simply saw through one or
> both legs at the points directly below the groin and a few inches
> above the knee. Once skinned, these portions may then be cut into
> round steaks of the carver's preferred thickness, cut into fillets,
> deboned for a roast, etc. Meat for several meals is thus readily
> obtained without the need for gutting and the complexities of
> preparing the entire form.
>
> The human being (also referred to throughout culinary history as "long
> pig" and "hairless goat" in the case of younger specimens) is not
> generally thought of as a staple food source. Observing the anatomy
> and skeleton, one can see that the animal is neither built nor bred
> for its meat, and as such will not provide nearly as much flesh as a
> pig or cow (for example, an average 1000 pound steer breaks down to
> provide 432 pounds of saleable beef). The large central pelvis and
> broad shoulder blades also interfere with achieving perfect cuts.
> There are advantages to this however, especially due to the fact that
> the typical specimen will weigh between 100-200 pounds, easily
> manipulated by one person with sufficient leverage.
>
> Here the caution in choosing your meal must be mentioned. It is VERY
> IMPORTANT to remember that animals raised for slaughter are kept in
> tightly controlled environments with their health and diet carefully
> maintained. Humans are not. Thus not only is the meat of each person
> of varying quality, but people are also subject to an enormous range
> of diseases, infections, chemical imbalances, and poisonous bad
> habits, all typically increasing with age. Also as an animal ages, the
> meat loses its tenderness, becoming tough and stringy. No farm animal
> is ever allowed to age for thirty years. Six to thirteen months old is
> a more common slaughtering point. You will obviously want a youthful
> but mature physically fit human in apparently good health. A certain
> amount of fat is desirable as "marbling" to add a juicy, flavorful
> quality to the meat. We personally prefer firm caucasian females in
> their early twenties. These are "ripe". But tastes vary, and it is a
> very large herd.
>
> The butcher will need a fairly roomy space in which to work (an
> interior location is suggested), and a large table for a butcher's
> block. A central overhead support will need to be chosen or installed
> ahead of time to hang the carcass from. Large tubs or barrels for
> blood and waste trimmings should be convenient, and a water source
> close by. Most of the work can be done with a few simple tools: sharp,
> clean short and long bladed knives, a cleaver or hatchet, and a
> hacksaw.
>
> Body Preparation: Acquiring your subject is up to you. For best
> results and health, freshness is imperative. A living human in
> captivity is optimal, but not always available. When possible make
> sure the animal has no food for 48 hours, but plenty of water. This
> fasting helps flush the system, purging stored toxins and bodily
> wastes, as well as making bleeding and cleaning easier. Under ideal
> conditions, the specimen will then be stunned into insensitivity.
> Sharp unexpected blows to the head are best, tranquilizers not being
> recommended as they may taint the flavor of the meat. If this is not
> possible without exciting the animal and causing a struggle (which
> will pump a greater volume of blood and secretions such as adrenaline
> throughout the body), a single bullet through the middle of the
> forehead or back of the skull will suffice.
>
> Hanging: Once the animal is unconscious or dead, it is ready to be
> hoisted. Get the feet up first, then the hands, with the head down.
> This is called the "Gein configuration". Simple loops of rope may be
> tied around the hands and feet and then attached to a crossbar or
> overhead beam. Or, by making a cut behind the Achilles tendon, a
> meathook may be inserted into each ankle for hanging support. The legs
> should be spread so that the feet are outside the shoulders, with the
> arms roughly parallel to the legs. This provides access to the pelvis,
> and keeps the arms out of the way in a ready position for removal.
> It's easiest to work if the feet are slightly above the level of the
> butcher's head.
>
> Bleeding: Place a large open vessel beneath the animal's head. With a
> long-bladed knife, start at one corner of the jaw and make a deep
> "ear-to-ear" cut through the neck and larynx to the opposite side.
> This will sever the internal and external carotid arteries, the major
> blood vessels carrying blood from the heart to the head, face, and
> brain. If the animal is not yet dead, this will kill it quickly, and
> allow for the blood to drain in any case. After the initial rush of
> blood, the stream should be controllable and can be directed into a
> receptacle. Drainage can be assisted by massaging the extremities down
> in the direction of the trunk, and by compressing and releasing,
> "pumping", the stomach. A mature specimen will contain almost six
> liters of blood. There is no use for this fluid, unless some source is
> waiting to use it immediately for ritual purposes. It acts as an
> emetic in most people if drunk, and it must be mentioned here that
> because of the eternal possibility of AIDS it is recommended that for
> safety's sake all blood should be considered to be contaminated and
> disposed of in some fashion. It is not known whether an HlV-infected
> human's flesh is dangerous even if cooked, but this is another item to
> consider when choosing a specimen, someone in the low-risk strata.
>
> Beheading: When the bleeding slows, preparation for decapitation can
> be started. Continue the cut to the throat around the entire neck,
> from the jawline to the back of the skull. Once muscle and ligament
> have been sliced away, the head can be cleanly removed by gripping it
> on either side and twisting it off, separation occurring where the
> spinal cord meets the skull. This is indicative of the method to be
> used for dividing other bones or joints, in that the meat should
> generally be cut through first with a knife, and the exposed bone then
> separated with a saw or cleaver. The merits of keeping the skull as a
> trophy are debatable for two principal reasons. First, a human skull
> may call suspicious attention to the new owner. Secondly, thorough
> cleaning is difficult due to the large brain mass, which is hard to
> remove without opening the skull. The brain is not good to eat.
> Removing the tongue and eyes, skinning the head, and placing it
> outside in a wire cage may be effective. The cage allows small
> scavengers such as ants and maggots to cleanse the flesh from the
> bones, while preventing it being carried off by larger scavengers,
> such as dogs and children. After a sufficient period of time, you may
> retrieve the skull and boil it in a dilute bleach solution to
> sterilize it and wash away any remaining tissue.
>
> Skinning: After removing the head, wash the rest of the body down.
> Because there is no major market for human hides, particular care in
> removing the skin in a single piece is not necessary, and makes the
> task much easier. The skin is in fact a large organ, and by flaying
> the carcass you not only expose the muscular configuration, but also
> get rid of the hair and the tiny distasteful glands which produce
> sweat and oil. A short-bladed knife should be used to avoid slicing
> into muscle and viscera. The skin is composed of two layers, an outer
> thinner one with a thicker tissue layer below it. When skinning, first
> score the surface, cutting lightly to be sure of depth and direction.
> The diagram of the skinning pattern is an example of strip-style
> skinning, dividing the surface into portions easy to handle. Reflect
> the skin by lifting up and peeling back with one hand, while bringing
> the knife in as flat to the skin as possible to cut away connective
> tissue. The external genitals present only a small obstacle. In the
> male the penis and scrotum can be pulled away from the body and
> severed, in the female the outer lips skinned as the rest of the body.
> It is important to leave the anus untouched at this point, and a
> circle of skin should be left around it. You need not bother skinning
> the hands and feet, these portions not being worth the effort unless
> you plan to pickle them or use them in soup. The skin can be disposed
> of, or made into fried rinds. Boil the strips and peel away the outer
> layer, then cut into smaller pieces and deep-fat fry in boiling oil
> until puffy and crisp. Dust with garlic salt, paprika and cayenne
> pepper.
>
> Gutting: The next major step is complete evisceration of the carcass.
> To begin, make a cut from the solar plexus, the point between the
> breastbone and stomach, almost to the anus. Be very careful not to cut
> into the intestines, as this will contaminate the surrounding area
> with bacteria and possibly feces (if this does happen, cleanse
> thoroughly). A good way to avoid this is to use the knife inside the
> abdominal wall, blade facing toward you, and making cautious progress.
>
> Make a cut around the anus, or "bung", and tie it off with twine. This
> also prevents contamination, keeping the body from voiding any
> material left in the bowel. With a saw, cut through the pubic bone, or
> "aitch". The lower body is now completely open, and you can begin to
> pull the organ masses (large and small intestines, kidneys, liver,
> stomach) out and cut them away from the back wall of the body.
>
> For the upper torso, first cut through the diaphragm around the inner
> surface of the carcass. This is the muscular membrane which divides
> the upper, or thoracic, and the lower abdominal cavities. Remove the
> breastbone, cutting down to the point on each side where it connects
> to the ribs, and then sawing through and detaching it from the collar
> bone. Some prefer to cut straight through the middle, depending on the
> ideas you have for cuts in the final stages. The heart and lungs may
> be detached and the throat cut into to remove the larynx and trachea.
> Once all of the inner organs have been removed, trim away any blood
> vessels or remaining pieces of connective tissue from the interior of
> the carcass, and wash out thoroughly.
>
> Remove the Arms: Actual butchering of the carcass is now ready to
> begin. Cut into the armpit straight to the shoulder, and remove the
> arm bone, the humerus, from the collar bone and shoulder blade. Chop
> the hand off an inch or so above the wrist. Most of the meat here is
> between elbow and shoulder, as the muscle groups are larger here and
> due to the fact that there are two bones in the forearm. Another way
> of cutting this portion is to cut away the deltoid muscle from the
> upper arm near the shoulder (but leaving it attached to the trunk)
> before removing the limb. This decreases the percentage of useable
> meat on the arm, but allows a larger shoulder strip when excising the
> shoulder blade. Purely a matter of personal preference. Cut into and
> break apart the joint of the elbow, and the two halves of each arm are
> now ready for carving servings from. Human flesh should always be
> properly cooked before eating.
>
> Halving the Carcass: The main body is now ready to be split. Some like
> to saw straight through the spine from buttocks to neck. This leaves
> the muscle fiber encasing the vertebrae on the end of the ribs. The
> meat here however is tightly wrapped about the bone, and we find it
> more suitable (if used at all) when boiled for soup. Thus, our
> preferred method is to completely remove the entire backbone by
> cutting and then sawing down either side from the tailbone on through.
>
> Quartering the Carcass: The halves may now be taken down, unless your
> preparation table or butcher block is very short. This is inadequate,
> and you will have to quarter while hanging, slicing through the side
> at a point of your choosing between rib cage and pelvis. Now is also
> the time to begin thinking about how you would like to serve the
> flesh, as this will determine the style of cuts you are about to make.
> These will also be greatly affected by the muscular configuration
> (physical fitness) of your specimen. First, chop the feet off at a
> point about three inches up from the ankle. The bones are very thick
> where the leg connects to the foot. You will want to divide the side
> of meat into two further principal portions: the ribs and shoulder,
> and the half-pelvis and leg. In between is the "flank" or belly, which
> may be used for fillets or steaks, if thick enough, or even bacon
> strips if you wish to cut this thinly. Thin and wide strips of flesh
> may also be rolled, and cooked to serve as a roast. Trim away along
> the edge of the ribs, and then decide whether you will cut steaks from
> the flank into the thighs and rump, and carve accordingly.
>
> Cutting the Top Quarter: Although not actually 25% of the meat you
> will get, this is designated as one-fourth of the carcass as divided
> into major portions. You may trim away the neck, or leave it to be
> connected with the shoulder, or "chuck". The first major step with
> this mass is to remove the shoulder blade and the collar bone. The
> best and easiest way we have found is to just cut along the outline of
> the shoulder blade, removing the meat on top and then dislocating the
> large bone. To excise the collar bone make an incision along its
> length and then cut and pry it away. Depending upon the development of
> the breast, you may decide it qualifies as a "brisket" and remove it
> before cutting the ribs. In the female the breast is composed largely
> of glands and fatty tissue, and despite its appetizing appearance is
> rather inedible. The ribs are the choice cut of the quarter. An
> perennial favorite for barbecuing, you may divide into sections of
> several ribs each and cook them as is, divide the strip in half for
> shorter ribs, or even carve rib steaks if the muscle mass is
> sufficient.
>
> Cutting the Lower Quarter: This is where most of the meat is, humans
> being upright animals. The muscle mass is largest in the legs and
> rump. The bulk is so comparatively large here that you can do just
> about anything with it. The main pieces are the buttock or rump and
> the upper leg, the thigh. Our typical division is to cut the leg off
> at the bottom of the buttock, then chop away the bony mass of the
> knee, at places two to three inches away in either direction. Before
> doing this, however, you may want to remove the whole calf muscle from
> the back of the lower leg, as this is the best cut in its area. The
> upper leg is now ready for anything, most especially some beautiful,
> thick round steaks. The rump will have to be carved from the pelvis in
> a rather triangular piece. The legs attach at the hip at a forward
> point on the body, so there will be little interference as you carve
> along the curve of the pelvis. Remaining meat will be on the thighs in
> front of the pelvis.
>
> And that's basically it. An average freezer provides plenty of storage
> space, or you may even wish to build a simple old-fashioned smokehouse
> (just like an outhouse, with a stone firepit instead of a shitter).
> Offal and other waste trimmings can be disposed of in a number of
> ways, burial, animal feed, and puree and flush being just a few. Bones
> will dry and become brittle after being baked an oven, and can be
> pulverized.

This post creeps me the **** out.

--
trippy
mhm31x9 Smeeter#29 WSD#30
sTaRShInE_mOOnBeAm aT HoTmAil dOt CoM
http://www.myspace.com/starshine_moonbeam

NP: "You Can't Kill Rock N' Roll" -- Ozzy Osbourne

"What did I tell the kid. It's about how hard you can get hit,
and keep moving forward. It's about how much you can take,
and keep moving forward. Get up."

-- Sylvester Stallone "Rocky Balboa"

"trippy" > wrote in message >
> This post creeps me the **** out.
>


It was supposed to. That's why some vegetarian posted it. I'm having
breaded center cut pork chops for dinner tonight though.

"Edwin Pawlowski" > wrote in message
et...
>
> "trippy" > wrote in message >
> > This post creeps me the **** out.
> >
>
>
> It was supposed to. That's why some vegetarian posted it. I'm having
> breaded center cut pork chops for dinner tonight though.
>
>
As I read it, the entire post could be summarized as: it's people. It just
seemed to be a very verbose and rather graphic way of more or less recycling
SNL's Soylent Green concept into a post about McDonald's hamburgers.

McDonald's, however, does use 100% Beef. Up until a few years ago, they
limited themselves to using only 100% American (USA) Beef. As I futher
understand it, the regular hamburger patties are apparently 1/10 lb.
hamburger patties (weight before cooking). Never worked at McDonald's
though, but it's something I've heard from others who have worked at
McDonald's.

(IMHO, there are several other fast food burgers that exceed the quality and
taste of McDonald's burgers. So except for any burgers on the $1 menu, or $2
Big Mac specials--I don't find any of their food to be worth the price
listed on the menu in terms of portion size and overall taste.)