Yes I know I have posted recently (perhaps in ASD and not here) about
feeling like I was starving and also craving chocolate. But now? I just
don't want to eat at all. Nothing sounds good to me. Nothing at all. I am
forcing myself to eat. I have not had any hypos in the past couple of days.
In fact most of my numbers have been normal, but... I did have to push
myself to eat a snack between meals. I feel if I did not do this I would
have actually had a hypo.

Yesterday we ate at my favorite Mexican place. I had the black bean soup
like I usually do. It is one of my favorite foods and it tasted very good.
But... I just didn't want to eat it!

Then for dinner we went to Outback Steakhouse. Now I must say this is a
place I would never want to eat at even if paid. I have put it off ever
since we moved here but my husband *really* wants to eat there. Angela and
I were planning to have his birthday there but now it looks like he might be
moving away again. Don't want to say too much since things are still up in
the air. Anyway... We were looking for a different place to eat and it is
tough to find places where Angela can get what she needs. And the Alice
Springs chicken with sweet potato fries fit the bill.

My husband really enjoyed his meal. So I guess that was good. Angela
picked the mushrooms and cheese off her food and I realized that I should
have ordered her the larger portion. The piece of chicken she got was like
4 bites. But other than that she enjoyed it.

My parents and I all had burgers. I had mine without the bun. But the meat
patty had absolutely no flavor to me and rather an off texture. It was as
though they had taken a pate style cat food and fried it in a patty or
something. My parents made no comment about their meal other than that it
wasn't as expensive as they thought it was going to be. But they didn't
finish their food either. We didn't have salads because they wanted almost
$15 for a wedge of lettuce that came with some other stuff that I would have
asked to be left off. So a rather dismal meal for me.

Tonight I made taco salads for dinner. Made the same exact ones last Sunday
and enjoyed mine. But tonight? I just didn't want to eat it. Kept putting
it off until I feared I might go hypo. I did manage to eat it but I didn't
enjoy it one bit.

I also had part of a bag of popcorn at Target. I find if I don't eat that I
will go hypo. But we do a lot of walking (a lot for me) on Sundays. Not
only did I not enjoy the popcorn but I didn't even enjoy the smell of it.
One of the first things I normally do when I walk into Target is sniff the
air to see if they have popcorn. I am always disappointed when the popcorn
machine is broken.

And now I am having to force myself to eat my snack. Nothing sounded good.
I made mashed potatoes. They don't taste good to me. They just taste salty
and they are made exactly like how I always make them. *sigh*

While the water for the potatoes was boiling I made a couple of pastrami
sandwiches for my husband. That seemed to even staunch my appetite further.
The pastrami smelled icky to me. Now granted I haven't eaten any since I
was in Jr. High. I went through one school year eating nothing but pastrami
sandwiches for lunch. So I did like it at one point. But apparently not
now.

I even had trouble coming up with a menu for the week and doing the grocery
shopping because literally nothing appealed to me.

Angela wasn't much help either. Her new thing is making smoothies that she
can consume. She is mainly using veggies. Tonight's had spinach and
cucumber. Some frozen berries, plain Greek yogurt and a little milk to thin
it down. As far as she is concerned she can eat smoothies three times a day
and doesn't need anything else.

I don't know how I got into this rut. Perhaps this is a sign that I am
getting sick or something? I do feel pretty good except for an itchy patch
of something on my forehead. Either psoriasis or eczema (I have both and
not sure which), an itchy bug bite on my wrist (probably spider) and I am
not liking our strangely high humidity. That is my new pet thing. Watching
the humidity. Seems it has been 76% or higher for weeks now. Currently at
88% and it feels quite muggy. Thankfully it's not hot. Just oddly damp.

I will keep forcing myself to eat because I know that I have to. But how
can I make myself *want* to eat?