Barbecue (alt.food.barbecue) Discuss barbecue and grilling--southern style "low and slow" smoking of ribs, shoulders and briskets, as well as direct heat grilling of everything from burgers to salmon to vegetables.

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On Sun, 12 Mar 2006 14:27:31 -0500, "Bob (this one)" >
wrote:

>Kevin S. Wilson wrote:
>> On Sun, 12 Mar 2006 02:32:44 -0500, "Bob (this one)" >
>> wrote:
>>
>>>I bet this brings the house down around the trailer park.

>>
>> Wallace Shawn says, "Block that metaphor!"

>
>I bet you can quote Rocky Horror, too. Here's a piece of toast. You know
>where to stick it.
>

Oh, my. I have to say I'm a tad disappointed in you, Bobbo. In your
frantic haste to toss back what must've seemed to you a witty retort,
you failed to consider the possibility that someone else's frame of
reference might not only encompass yours, but also extend beyond it,
in this case well past minor character actors and cult movies. Still,
I'm going to help you out here, Bobbo, because I'm your friend and I
hate to see you continue to parade your ignorance for all and sundry
to see as if today was Pride Day for the Slow-Witted and Culturally
Destitute.

1. Long before those shiny colorful movies that have so thoroughly
arrested your attention, people told stories of all kinds, both fact
and fiction, in what we grown-ups like to call "periodicals."

2. The father of diminutive actor Wallace Shawn was the editor of one
such periodical, in which regularly appeared bits of badly mangled
prose under the heading "Block that Metaphor."

That's all the time I had set aside today for remedial instruction, so
I'm unable to tell you the title of the periodical. I expect you'll
soon be scurrying over to google to complete this small portion of
your lessons.

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"Kevin S. Wilson" > wrote in message
...
> On Sun, 12 Mar 2006 14:27:31 -0500, "Bob (this one)" >
> wrote:
>
> >Kevin S. Wilson wrote:
> >> On Sun, 12 Mar 2006 02:32:44 -0500, "Bob (this one)" >
> >> wrote:
> >>
> >>>I bet this brings the house down around the trailer park.
> >>
> >> Wallace Shawn says, "Block that metaphor!"

> >
> >I bet you can quote Rocky Horror, too. Here's a piece of toast. You know
> >where to stick it.
> >

> Oh, my. I have to say I'm a tad disappointed in you, Bobbo. In your
> frantic haste to toss back what must've seemed to you a witty retort,
> you failed to consider the possibility that someone else's frame of
> reference might not only encompass yours, but also extend beyond it,
> in this case well past minor character actors and cult movies. Still,
> I'm going to help you out here, Bobbo, because I'm your friend and I
> hate to see you continue to parade your ignorance for all and sundry
> to see as if today was Pride Day for the Slow-Witted and Culturally
> Destitute.
>
> 1. Long before those shiny colorful movies that have so thoroughly
> arrested your attention, people told stories of all kinds, both fact
> and fiction, in what we grown-ups like to call "periodicals."
>
> 2. The father of diminutive actor Wallace Shawn was the editor of one
> such periodical, in which regularly appeared bits of badly mangled
> prose under the heading "Block that Metaphor."
>
> That's all the time I had set aside today for remedial instruction, so
> I'm unable to tell you the title of the periodical. I expect you'll
> soon be scurrying over to google to complete this small portion of
> your lessons.
>


Ouch.......well done Kev. Hope you don't mind my swiping the "Pride Day"
bit.


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On Sun, 12 Mar 2006 13:02:26 -0700, Kevin S. Wilson >
wrote:

<snip>

>1. Long before those shiny colorful movies that have so thoroughly
>arrested your attention, people told stories of all kinds, both fact
>and fiction, in what we grown-ups like to call "periodicals."
>
>2. The father of diminutive actor Wallace Shawn was the editor of one
>such periodical, in which regularly appeared bits of badly mangled
>prose under the heading "Block that Metaphor."


IOW, you were actually *complimenting* Bobbo by making that
comparison. How typical of him that he would completely miss the
point.

BW
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On Sun, 12 Mar 2006 20:46:20 GMT, "tom" > wrote:

>
>"Kevin S. Wilson" > wrote in message
.. .
>> On Sun, 12 Mar 2006 14:27:31 -0500, "Bob (this one)" >
>> wrote:
>>
>> >Kevin S. Wilson wrote:


<snip>

>> That's all the time I had set aside today for remedial instruction, so
>> I'm unable to tell you the title of the periodical. I expect you'll
>> soon be scurrying over to google to complete this small portion of
>> your lessons.
>>

>
>Ouch.......well done Kev.


Indeed! And in his generosity, Kevin gave Bobbo two lessons in one.
Let's see whether Bobbo can identify what the hidden lesson was
teaching. I'm guessing he will. It was rather obvious.

BW
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On Sun, 12 Mar 2006 14:23:12 -0800, "Duwop" >
wrote:

> wrote in message
>> >
>> >Ouch.......well done Kev.

>>
>> Indeed! And in his generosity, Kevin gave Bobbo two lessons in one.
>> Let's see whether Bobbo can identify what the hidden lesson was
>> teaching. I'm guessing he will. It was rather obvious.

>
>Ooh-ooh ! I know this one, "how to gratuitously cross post and win friends
>and admirers from the safety of your keyboard".
>
>What do I win?
>

Our enduring pity, for one thing.



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To save all the need to read many repetitive posts, I've consolidated
them here for your dining and dancing pleasure. Note the similarity of
tone and imagery. What is the name of that activity with kids sitting in
a circle all doing pretty much the same thing. Oh the name escapes me...

Actually a decent display of vocabulary, not bad grammar, imagery a
little thin, cliches a bit overdone. Still, promising.

No, seriously...

Pastorio
-------------------------
Kevin S. Wilson wrote:
> Oh, my. I have to say I'm a tad disappointed in you, Bobbo. In your
> frantic haste to toss back what must've seemed to you a witty retort,
> you failed to consider the possibility that someone else's frame of
> reference might not only encompass yours, but also extend beyond it,
> in this case well past minor character actors and cult movies.
> Still, I'm going to help you out here, Bobbo, because I'm your friend
> and I hate to see you continue to parade your ignorance for all and
> sundry to see as if today was Pride Day for the Slow-Witted and
> Culturally Destitute.
>
> 1. Long before those shiny colorful movies that have so thoroughly
> arrested your attention, people told stories of all kinds, both fact
> and fiction, in what we grown-ups like to call "periodicals."
>
> 2. The father of diminutive actor Wallace Shawn was the editor of one
> such periodical, in which regularly appeared bits of badly mangled
> prose under the heading "Block that Metaphor."


I didn't know that William Shawn was Wallace's father. Took me this
prompt. But, you missed the point of my comment.

> That's all the time I had set aside today for remedial instruction,
> so I'm unable to tell you the title of the periodical. I expect
> you'll soon be scurrying over to google to complete this small
> portion of your lessons.


To which Barb wrote from her position of intellectual superiority and
self-thrilling erudition:

> IOW, you were actually *complimenting* Bobbo by making that
> comparison. How typical of him that he would completely miss the
> point.


WHOOOOOOSH

Kevin went on to write, apropos a different twist in his knickers:

> You keep mispelling "pompous asses" in a variety of inventive ways in
> some vain attempt to align yourself with a group of people you
> obviously feel are your social and intellectual betters, but whom
> have thus far failed to clutch you nurturingly to their collective
> breast.


<LOL> Take a breath, Kev. The screen will still be there...

> Kinda sad, really.
>
> Here's a hint: Using a bit of jargon such as "subcutaneous
> inflammation" doesn't make me a physician.


Clearly not. However, my using "mouthfeel" is a professional usage
because it's from a field in which I am a professional, and have been
for a few decades.

> The noise will go away once you stop moving your lips when you read.


Puhleeze.

> PS: Thanks to your appearance here, I better understand the audience
> for those ads in the back of "Bon Appetit," the ones touting a
> "Getaway Cooking Weekend with Chef [insert manufactured celebrity
> d'jour]."


To which Barb opined from her Olympian post:

> Probably the same ones who thought "Sideways" was a rilly meaningful
> fillum with a lot of profound insights and sophisticated humor.


To which the suddenly sober-seeming Kevin replied with a sudden eclat of
effete japery, demonstrating that same puckish sense of humor so
endearing to all and sundry. Really:

> Plus also by watching it you can learn a lot about what wines go with
> what kinds of food and stuff. Or, as the noted food and wine critic
> Navin Johnson once said, "Why, do you realize that in the past two
> short months we have acquired the sophistication it takes some people
> a lifetime to acquire? Come on, let's toast!"


To which Barb offered her seriously approved humor, removing her glasses
for additional emphasis like those guys in the aspirin commercials:

> I was at Trader Joe's earlier today and, while waiting in line,
> enjoyed the sendup of wine snobbery in their goofy, wine-critic-style
> descriptions of the "varietal" chocolate bars. My favorite was the
> one with "a hint of tobacco."


And Kevin went on to write: (we could almost see the furrowed brow and
leather elbow patches)

> A month or two ago, "Cook's Illustrated" ran just such an article --
> quite seriously -- about various brands of chocolate, though without
> referring to them as "varietal." What saved it from insipidness was
> the advice about which brands might be better suited for certain
> types of cooking.


insipidity... insipiditude... insipidence... insipience...

Kevin also wrote this rollicking next part:

> Oh, my. My, my, my.
>
> Shirley by now the Usernet has come up with a label for this kind of
> bottom-of-the-barrel lameocity. What does one call someone so
> utterly bereft of imagination and wit that he is reduced to merely
> repackaging -- verbatim -- the rebukes, admonitions, insults, and
> dismissive verbal size-10 Doc Martens in the ass hurled his way, then
> flinging them back like a deranged chimp with a fistful of feces?
>
> I suppose "Bob" will do.
>
> Bob, I'm always interested in discussing English grammar and
> punctuation, as are many of the others in these here froups. So other
> than the coordinating conjunction that Barbara obviously failed to
> delete as she edited her post, what exactly is incorrect about the
> grammar and punctuation of the two sentences you quoted? Just so
> there's no ambiguity, I'm referring to the two sentences you quoted
> when you were pulling a Bob by demonstrating that you are so utterly
> bereft of imagination and wit that you are reduced to merely
> repackaging -- verbatim -- the rebukes, admonitions, insults, and
> dismissive verbal size-10 Doc Martens in the ass hurled your way,
> then flinging them back like a deranged chimp with a fistful of
> feces. Those two.


<LOL> It was too ferocious a PKB to let ride. Her stomping, flouncing
prose made it all the better. Guilty pleasure.

And still more, using those cutesy conventions used by the initiates;
the "innards," as we say:

> I wondered what happened to Bill Palmer. When did he start psoting to
> the cooking froups?


> Barb sneered, delicately pinioning herself to that wax tablet, wings

spread:
> Free tip: When your attempts at being patronizing and superior make
> you look like such a fool, it makes you look even more foolish when
> you try to be even more patronizing. Try another technique.
>
> That is, unless you're only out to impress yourself. In which case,
> I'm sure the self-congratulations are their own reward. BW


> To which Dave vainly offered to help Barb by compounding her sneer,

offering a thudding suckup and an analytical capacity only exceeded by
the rubber plant in my living room:
> But! If he were only out to impress himself? Surely he could do this
> in the privacy of his own home, rather than on Usenet where hundreds
> (if not thousands) of sites would display his attempt to the world?
> No, he's trying to impress others. Unfortunately, his superior
> hauteur contains not even a hint of humor, self-knowledge, or
> self-deprecation, as far as I've seen anyway (I'm not a r.f.c
> inhabitant, so have only seen the feet he's been putting in
> his mouth over here.)
>
> Dave "less > more" DeLaney


A fitting ending to a frayed panoply of delicate, self-congratulatory
sneers and lamentably ordinary jabs. Less > more explains it all.
Triumph of form over substance.

HAND. NO. Wait. Have a terrific day. One of the best days you've ever
had. Better still, have the best day you've ever had. Anything is too
good for you. And I mean that most sincerely.

No, seriously...

Pastorio
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On 2006-03-13, Bob (this one) > wrote:
> To save all the need to read many repetitive posts, I've consolidated
> them here for.....



RFC News 3/13/06: Flamewars of Bombastic Bores Rages On


nb

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"Bob (this one)" > wrote

> No, seriously...


Bob? Why are there several fishing hooks dangling out of
your butt? You're lucky they didn't perforate you bowels
as they passed through.

--oTTo--


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Bob (this one) > wrote:

> To save all the need to read many repetitive posts,


you've decided to stop posting? Awesome.

-jwgh

--
"Only in America could something like that not happen in America."
-- Matt McIrvin, 29 November 2005
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On Mon, 13 Mar 2006 01:27:14 -0500, "Bob (this one)" wrote:

>To save all the need to read many repetitive posts, I've consolidated
>them here for your dining and dancing pleasure. Note the similarity of
>tone and imagery. What is the name of that activity with kids sitting in
>a circle all doing pretty much the same thing. Oh the name escapes me...
>
>Actually a decent display of vocabulary, not bad grammar, imagery a
>little thin, cliches a bit overdone. Still, promising.


Dank does this better than you, which should shame you into changing
your name to "Boob" permanently. Just Google "dank" or "Dan Krueger"
to feel the pathetic weakness of your little cut-and-paste post, Mr.
Amazing Cookie Man. It's all about the "mouthfeel."

--
Chris McG.
Harming humanity since 1951.
"What do you expect from a bunch of kiwi smoking sheep herders?" --
oTTo


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On 2006-03-13, Jacob W. Haller > wrote:
> Bob (this one) > wrote:
>
>> To save all the need to read many repetitive posts,

>
> you've decided to stop posting? Awesome.


No, ARK will be closed for cleaning for the next few weeks.
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Kevin S. Wilson wrote:
<snip>

Why'd you drag this into alt.food.barbecue, Kevvie? Bob doesn't post,
here, ya know. Oops.

Another Kevin Moment brought to you by... Kevin, of course.

-sw

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