Caught in the Act!


SWMBO[1] and I did A Date[2] recently. (Gran'mah and Paw-puh were
pullin' down prison duty at Castle Greenfield, planning their own
evening of partying, popcorn, and movies.) We took advantage of
their generous offer of hospitality by going out to one of our
favorite restaurants a mere 40 miles distant.

The evening started off like most of Real Life's® hopeful
evenings: one "disaster" after another but nothing a little
patience (and two 800 mg Motrin [3]) couldn't fix. We arrived at
the restaurant to find we had it to ourselves! [Bonus!] I'm one of
those type of patrons that enjoys a good pampering and an empty
restaurant means that the servers often hover like yellow jackets
at a picnic table. I like this. As we were seated, the staff
converged like we were magnetized and they were iron filings. We
had bread, water, drinks, a running conversation (not with
ourselves) with the owner/proprietor, and immediately started to
relax. Ten minutes into this spa-like setting, a trio of silver
foxes arrived. They were greeted like long-lost family and seated
at the table next to us.

At first, I felt the poison of Jealousy coursing through my entire
being. Here we had the ENTIRE restaurant (staff and floor) all to
ourselves and now we had to share. During my private grousing, the
similarity between what I was thinking and Spawn's philosophy as
Center of the Known Universe surfaced. That revelation and
comparison was unpleasant and almost enough to spoil the remaining
portion of my evening. But SWMBO saw my sulk forming -- and being
a mom to multiples -- started to massage my smarting ego.

Ibrahim, the owner, came out to tell us all about the food he was
preparing that night. Duck with port sauce, Pork Marsala, Beef
Wellington, Sautéed Salmon, and Pheasant were the specials.
Stuffed Portabello, crab cakes, creme d'asperagus soup, and a
salad with walnuts [<YEESH!> A more VILE-tasting nut there isn't!
Yuck! Ick! Phooey!] were described in gory detail. I didn't
remember anything after the Pork Marsala, though, because I tuned
out. I'd made my choice and I was stickin' to it. This made
remembering what I wanted with the rest of the meal sort of
difficult but SWMBO is a more-attentive listener so she was able
to (more-or-less) recite the specials I missed. Our server came
back and we placed our order for food and wine.

During this time, I happen to glance over at the trio. The lone
male looked down quickly and turned an interesting shade of
crimson. I didn't understand the reaction because all we'd done
was talk about food, the menu, the difficulty that She was having
deciding between Salmon, Beef, Pork, Duck, Pheasant, Pasta, wine,
salad, soup, appetizer, and the kids... <Ding!> The proverbial
light bulb clicked bright.

I dropped my voice and Herself nodded. She'd witnessed a similar
event with one of the women. We dropped our voices
conspiratorially.

It took a few minutes to get "back in the mood" but the
restaurant's ambiance worked its magic; pretty soon we were back
to joking and talking about every topic that was verboten around
the daughter-units. As we talked, there were pauses between topics
(normal for us) which seemed to get filled by noises coming from
the trio's table. Our pauses lengthened -- usually in
mid-thought... It was at one such point where I was talking about
writing Da Book[4] and heard, "...it was the largest kielbasa I'd
ever seen! And it just kept coming!" The two women of the trio
were guffawing, SWMBO was shaking with laughter, and I was burning
from my ears to my toes because I was definitely only
half-listening when the punchline was delivered.

The male fox was grinning that pleased look of "Gotchya!" at our
table and asked, "Have either of you been to Poland?"

I'm sure I looked like Daughter-units Alpha and Beta after I
caught them filching Oreo's that afternoon. I didn't, couldn't,
answer.

"Well?" he continued good-naturedly, "Have you?"

SWMBO smiled, very sheepishly, and answered him, "No. Only
Germany."

"Ah... Germany's beautiful, too, but Poland's stunningly
beautiful! You would both like it. By the way, I've been
shamefully eaves-dropping on your conversation, too. How'd you
like to 'join' us, since we're obviously wanting to hear each
other's stories?"

And that's how we got caught.

[1] She Who Must Be Obeyed
[2] This is becoming "regular" again -- we have a full corral of
baby-sitters just chompin' at their bits -- which means that all
those restaurants, plays, concerts, and movies that we've been
meaning to see we're now able! [Woo-HOO!]
[3] Better living through the US Pharmaceutical Industry!
[4] SWMBO took it amazingly well, considering her viewpoints on my
sharing family "secrets."