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D.Currie[_1_] D.Currie[_1_] is offline
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Default My first dead spread


"Old Mother Ashby" > wrote in message
...
> Sheldon wrote:
>
>>Jewish funerals are the best... no food except maybe plain sponge cake,
>>but everyone gets plastered to the gills on Fleishman's rye whiskey and
>>Slivavitz.
>>
>>

> I think you'd need to get plastered. I've only ever been to one Jewish
> funeral, and I didn't go to anything afterwards (actually it was all
> terribly complicated, the deceased was *** and his parents wouldn't
> acknowledge his partner), but the funeral was just the bleakest I've ever
> been to, cold and comfortless both physically and ceremonially.
>
> By way of cheerng us up I am reminded of an allegedly Jewish joke that
> actually has universal application.
>
> The rabbi is on holiday and his locum has to do a funeral for a chap he's
> never met. Before the ceremony he approaches members of the congregation
> for information about the deceased so that he can run up a eulogy. Every
> comment is negative. Time's getting on so he has to proceed. Comes the
> appropriate moment and he asks the mourners "Does nobody have anything
> positive to say about this man?" After a minute an old guy in the back row
> raises his hand and says "His brother was worse!"
>
> Christine