In article >,
cathyxyz > wrote:

> I have attended a few funerals in my time and there has indeed been food
> and drink served at the "wake". However, after the service, I did not go
> to all my other friends and say "Wow, what great food they had at that
> funeral!." I don't even remember what they served at the last one I went
> to - it was for a young boy of 18 who had been killed by a drunk driver.
> All I remember is the incredible grief. That's what I find ghoulish. And
> IMHO, no matter how one dies it is ALWAYS a terrible thing for the ones
> left behind. I know that having a wake or whatever you want to call it
> is traditional in most religions; I don't have a problem with that - but
> I still feel that discussing the food served afterward, with strangers -
> who never even knew the deceased, is not something I can bring myself to do.

I guess I disagree. I've not been to many funerals, only two, but
they were celebrations of the life that had passed. People told jokes,
sang songs, as well as telling touching stories and participating in the
religious rituals. I sadly never met my husband's maternal grandmother,
but I heard that her funeral was a riot. Their family was big on
teasing and joking and all came to celebrate the lovely and funny woman
she was. Part of it is that almost everyone I know close enough to
mourn with comes from a religious background of some sort in which there
is a hope that the person went on to a better place, and so it is us who
are missing them that is sad, not that they are dead.

Regards,
Ranee (who wants a great spread at her wake, and all sorts of fun)

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"She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands." Prov 31:13

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