In article >, Dave Smith
> wrote:

> I was walking across the lot one night with a friend as a gull flew
> over and I felt something hit my back. Sure enough, I had a big white
> glob of crap running down the back of my blue shirt. Shortly after
> that they got rid of the gulls, and I was not sorry to see them go.

When I was a kid, we all shot BB guns in the desert. The dump was about
two miles away from home, and California gulls congregated there. There
were large excavation humps of dirt that they rested on when tired of
eating garbage. I believe that they were a protected species, so I'm
about to reveal a crime that I committed. I was about twelve.
I was standing near a hump with my pump BB gun which was supposedly
more powerful than a regular Daisy. A gull landed on top of the hump,
and I took the shot. It rolled down to my feet as if dead, and I picked
it up and ran proudly to my friend to display my kill. BB guns don't
kill gulls unless you do a head shot. I hadn't.
As I displayed the gull, it awakened, pumped a huge load of hot crap
all over the front of my T-shirt, broke loose from my stunned fingers
and flew away. I can still see the whole incident as if it were
yesterday.

leo