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Tyler Durdin Tyler Durdin is offline
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Default Semi-Annual Book of Saukrates Shame

You just can't make up shit like this without being really ****ing
dumb. This guy should have a $multi-million youtube channel.


The Book of Saukrates - Version .9999683

Usenet's Kook of the Month June 2013
Usenet Kook of the Year 2013
Usenet Coward of the Year 2013
Rookie Kook of the Year 2013
Kooki Information Minister Award
Busted Urinal Award
The Kluck Lysaght Memorial "Tar & Feathers" Award
Village Idiot Award
Ed Conrad Memorial "Brain of Stone" Award, October 2013
Kook of The month: June 2013
Liar of the month: September 2013

--------------------------------------------------------
Nothing you're about to see has been taken out of context.
---------------------------------------------------------

TO BE SORTED:

Steve, I was always overweight. That's the point of
the disease, is overweightness

I begin starving just by missing one SNACK per day.

And if you had a brain you would use GOOGLE just like the rest of us
intelelent pople.

So ****ing what? I've saved at least $50 Dollar's in my checking
account for 20 year's, and I'm not rich!!

Try to stop pulling shit out of your ass and tryying to post it
here as intelegence.

Heavily processed foods means it tastes really delicios

Breaking the law is illegal

There's no PROOF that apple's are healthier then Fry's.

The sign of intelligence is that you are constantly wondering.
Idiots are always dead sure about every damn thing they are doing
in their life.

Wendys is havnig a drawing to win free hamburger's for a year. If
you win they give you a $260 Wendys gift card. Thats only a triple
cheeseburger ONCE A WEEK for a year!!! If I win free hamburgers
for a year I expect to be able to get all the free hamburger's I
can eat in a year not just ONCE A WEEEK! What a ripoff!!!!!!

You know what? I have no ****ing clue.

Well I'm not admittring that I'm wrong... but if I DID admit it I
was wrong.

No, I'm not backpedaling at all, asshole. The new year's is
celebrated TWICE each year.

Well that's just perfectlyfine, becouse I'm NOT a troll. The
reason people are NOT ignoring me, is becouse they respect my
knowledge and experience.

Wrong steve, I can't believe your your aggreeing with me, becouse
YOUR FULL OF SHIT.

Jerry has deflected all accusations of virginity for years but
finally admits it:

Sqwertz> So you admit you're a *35* year old virgin.

Jerry> Id' admit that a million times over. I DO NOT LIE, STEVE.

But I'm not proud that I didn't waste my youth away in college, I
actually have a LIFE to live here you know, why waste my time with
education, which only leads to more WORK.

Lookly closely and reread what UI just worte. I NEVER CLAIMED TO
BE AN IDOIT...

And just what is wrong with looking like a uneducated moron? I
never claimed to be brilliant... my only field of expertise is,
fast-food, other then that, well the quolity of education I
received is NOT impressive. I never denied that.

The religion I follow is, there is no god, and if there is anything
that I need to treat as a god, it's ME becouse the only thing
important to me, that brings my life and sort of meaning, is
increasing my own pleasure.

But far more important to myu life then any "religion" is my
culture, and teh culture I have chosen is fast-food culture. Since
fast-food gives me pleasure, going to taco bell every day is just
me following my religious beliefs.

I happened to graduated from those schools, moron.

Jerry borrows $100 off of his brother under the false pretences
that he's going to use the money for a health club membership:

ARE you kidding me? I worked out GREAT FOR me.. I got a hundred
dollors! I never said I would actually spent it on health-clubs.
HE assumed that. And, whenver he says when are you going to pay me
back, All I have to do is say, I don't have the money, which is
almost always a true thing anyway. The only thing he would do with
that money is waste in on tuition, whih is a waste because he's
already smarter then 99.999% percent of the population.

Excuse me, but your the one maknig an idoit of yourself here, not
me.

> it has been a well understood accepted fact that I am in chrage
> here in alt.food.fast.food for many years



> I wasn't critizing, I Was just pointing out his idoicy.


Becouse steve, as I already explained multiple Times, the Subway
diet is the only diet compatible with my unique metabolism. NOt
all Diets are the same, and some actually couse me to GAIN weight,
but most do mothing at all.

The next time you are killfiled, you will not realize it, until,
you look back and say, "gee I haven't posted anything in over a
week... I must've been killfiled"

There are currently 53 people in my kill-file, Including me.

> God your a retard.


I at least are smart enough to read the RIGHT GROUP that matches my
interests.

Steve you moran, I never said I didn't know how to use google.

English is NOT my mother tongue, AMERICAN is. And in America, we
have alittle thing called freedom of speech, which gaurentee's myt
right to talk and spell any damn way I please.

Oh and steve, I was fat LOOOONG before I started eating fast food
every day.

"Fast-food couses obesity" is a MYTH.

I was completely educated about Apostrophe's in the THIRD GRADE,
where it was tought to me that they are optional in word's ending
in "s"

Your main issue is, your stubborness and inability to just drop a
argument oncew you lost it.

Becouse I made the mistake of thinking Intelegent people posted
hear the wouldv'e figured out it was obvious.

Meanwhile I'm cruising around town in my new car, eating great food
non-stop and enjoying life to the FULLEST.

but there's a LOT of complete idiot's on the Internet, and many of
them eat fast-food.













Jerry Sauk on Hygiene and Diet:
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I *AM* FAT, LAZY AND SLOVENLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What's your point????

I eat more in week then you probably do in Two Months!!!!!!!!!!!!

because when I order food for four people it's actually just for
one person

All I have to do is not shower for a week and eat bean burritos the
day before. I'll knock out the whole crowd, in fact my brothers
"banned" me from eating bean burritos.

And you can't live on just Nacho's alone, you need other food like
Taco's and burritos.

I really don't think it's possible for me to get sick of Nacho's,
I've been eating them non-stop for the last 25 years.

I can eat three [foot-long Subway] sandwiches for one meal!
+chips/soda/cookies etc

Don't forget you have to wash/dry your hands also when your done
washing the dishes. I'm pretty sure they wash thier hands several
times a day, even though it's a waste of time/water.

Soda is not sugar water. It doesn't even half sugar in it at all,
it's corn syrop. And even if it WAS real sugar, then it's STILL not
just sugar because they add many multiple other flavar's to each
different soda, that's why they all taste different.





Jerry the Doktor:
----------------------------------------------------------------------
"What the hell?? I've noticed the same thing too. I don't know the
science or anything but when I have an entire pizza right before
beditme I often wake up absolutely starving."

The calorie's from soda do nothing to fill you up, and therefore
don't count to your daily calorie requirement.

Steve wrote: You don't have the balls. Jerry responds: I don't have
a need to.

But If your body isn't at 98 degrees, then your not alive.

If I was dead, i'd be the first to know.

Nobody drinks water.





Jerry Sauk on Intelligence:
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Of the billion's of people on the internet I can't believe I'm the
dumbest.

Damn your one stupid idoit.

That paragraph is unitellagible, so you need to improve your
grammer

Your going tohave to learn some basic common sence and reading
skiils if this discussion is gonig to continue.

BTW I'm a high school graduate. Kiss my ass. [Editors Note: Jerry
did indeed graduate from Green Bay East High School]

That's funny. STEVE callled me stupid all the time. A amazing
coincidence? I THINK NOT.

That's why everyone is always mean to me. It's because they envy
me.

JUST HOW STUPID DO YOU REALLY THINK I AM, STEVE. It never amazes me
how retarted you people are.

Please learn to tell the difference between realty and your
imagination.

Jerry defending his Spelling: Jim Asked: Why would your "speller
checker" have flagged awkward and not have flagged "approptirate"
or "majar" ? Jerry Responds: Because I didn't CHECk those words. I
only checked awkward because I hadno idea how to spell it.

You've been saying a lot fo dumb things lately.

It's not cucumbers, it's relish. Once it's made into a condiment,
it's not considered a "veggie" anymore.

Philosophy by Saukrates, and other pearls of assorted wisdom.
----------------------------------------------------------------------


I LOVE fast food steve. If you insult it, your insulting me.

Fast-Food IS real food, that's why it's called FOOD Ewvery damn
culture on the planet involves food, well, fast- food is a part of
my personal culture and is therefore a huge part of my life.

I'm the most humble person on theis damn group,

You know, you don't have to eat the burger end-to-end. Once I get
just a little past half-way I turn the burger and switch to
corner-to-corner so I can specifically avoid that problem. And I
end up with meatless bun less then the size of a dime, which I can
easily eat or cheaper to throw out.

[Jerry getting frustrated when nobody responds to his Usenet posts]
"why is nobody responding? I pay more than $20 a month for this,
plus 5 for supernews!"

I'll only admit I'm wrong if I actually AM wrong, which is rare.

I reserve the right to discuss fast-food in this group free of
prejudice harassment.

Somtimes the troll's here are so quick to point out your an idiot,
even when their the ones making the mistake's in the first place.
I've learned to ignore it.

SO WHAT'S WITH THE UNPROVOKED HOSTILITY???

Those are what I said they are.. chicken SANDWICHES, which I do
occaisionally eat because they don'th ave bones in them, and are
thus much easier to eat. And they taste better then real chicken
anyway.

And also I'm sick of the extremely unprofessional behavior by the
teen-age night crew at Subway... it has come to my attention that
they have given me a nickname and I accidently overheard it. This
is unnacceptable, how can they be so unprofessional to the people
who are providing them with the money for their paycheck? [Editors
Note: My sources at Subway have informed me that that nickname was
"Batman" since Jerry dresses like a goth - probably paints his face
white, too]

[On the TAco Hell Drive-Through:] They said that there was too much
fumes coming from my car and it was gassing out the employee's in
the windows, and they said customers sometimes complained. They
also said the engine was too loud and they could never hear my
order or the person in front of me's. Due to modern technology,
they should be able to solve this problem with some sort of
inexpensive noise filter. I told them to go to hell and I was never
coming back. My Taco Bell consumption will definitely decrease,
whenever I DO go it will always be to another location.

when you live with your parents you need to have a place of your
own away from home. For me it's my car. Only thing that sucks about
it is It's VERY difficult to drive whenever it's raining, for some
reason whenever it rains once the car starts moving I can't stop
it, because if I stop the engine dies and it won't restart until
the next day. So I have to alter my directions to busy stoplights,
and go thru stopsigns real slow hopefully no traffic is coming. I
had a big problem last year when th eproblem first started, I
thought I could make it thru the drive-thru at Taco Bell by hitting
the brakes and the gas at the same time, but there was too much
traffic there that I messed up and it stalled right by the order
box. (the drive through has curbs so all the traffic was stuck)
This was the same Taco Bell that I currently boycott. Anyway I
couldn't get it started because of the rain, so three Taco Bell
guys had to come out and push my car away in the rain. When they
pushed me passed the window, I hit the brakes to stop and get my
food, and the three guys got really mad and said some less then
proffessional remarks to me. This was the first day I knew the
manager there on a first-name-basis.

And it's kinda fun to argue with Steve sometimes because he's so
slow, and I admit he's one of the few people on the Internet that I
can always gauranteed win an arguement with.

Jerry on Employment:
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm sure I've had more jobs in the last five years then you've had
in your entire life!

Jerry the Lawyer:
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Taco Bell is Public Property. Otehrwise they wouldd have no
trepassing signs.

Uhhh.... private companies can own and operate public property...

NAD FOR THE THIRD TIME, I was not banned from Taco Bell, I
BOYCOTTED that one store because I was "banned" from the
drive-thru.

Lifestyle, Jerry-style:
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I am VERY happy with my drive-thru lifstyle. But there is NO
lifestyle, and you know it, that doesn't have it's annoyance's.

I don't need a airplane to see the world. There are Mcdonald's ALL
OVER THE WORLD, so whenever I enter a mcdonalds, and they are all
the same, I am seeing the entire world.

Fast-food is a majar part of my lifestyle/culture and I'm happy
with it, because it's delicious. Being fat has nothing to do with
it, there's a lot of people who eat tons of fast-food and isn't
fat.

Tavo Bell is a majar part of my daily personal culture, so of
course when there's a change to it unjustly, and people are
affected, it results in at least SOME part of suffering.

Get a life. Fast-food places are fascinating cultural centers.

Taco Bell is also pretty consistent, their usually always
high-quality

It's just proof that it's exceptible for some culture's to throw
fast-food bags in the back seat and dispose of them all at once.

[Jerry on washing dishes:] It takes me 0.5 seconds to toss my used
taco bell bag into the back seat.

Jerry, King of the Drive-Thru
----------------------------------------------------------------------
the family should have actually gone INSIDE the store and let
single people like me have exclusive use of the drive-thru.

Jerry on Relationships:
----------------------------------------------------------------------


I wrote: I care about you, Jerry. Jerry responds: Are drinking
tonight?????????????????????????????

a few years back, when I had my own place, I came over for
thanksgiving and brought pizza, well when they saw it they thought
it was for everyone and to make a long story short there was a big
fight..

[OP:] You have no idea what you are missing out on by refusing to
leave your car. [Jerry Response:] Sure I do. Screaming kids,
abusive fast-food workers, dirty tables, standing in line, having
to use manners, the list goes on and on.

That does it. One more insult, and your going back to my killfile.
Consider yourself warned.

Every family has thier own tradtiond, but the basics are FOOD.....
... and LOTS OF IT.

How can you POSSIBLE brag to have as much success with human
females as you do yet still have the time to waste your time on
crap like this [referring to the Book of Saukisms].

[Referring to his dining alone because otherwise he'd have to use
"manners"] Be honest, Paco, tell me that you never farted while
eating alone. And let me guess... it didn't stink of course.

[POsted by his brother in another group]

I love my brother but he's fat, stupid, works (occasionally) in a
restaurant, is 28 and just moved back home.

I'm taking my car less and less becuase it's current top speed is
about 30 MPH