On Thu, 16 Oct 2014 11:46:06 -0500, Moe DeLoughan >
wrote:

>That's because Julie isn't looking for help, she's looking for attention.
>
>http://www.thenew-renaissanceman.com/mind-games-2.html
>
>Have you ever found yourself in this situation, when someone asks for
>suggestions and then rejects every single option offered to them. This
>is a very common mind game played among groups, and it was actually
>the first game to ever be recorded and studied. Dr. Eric Berne has
>given it the colloquial name of "Why don't you- yes, but..."
>
>At face value, this interaction is pretty straightforward. It consists
>of a man or woman asking for suggestions, but then rejecting each one
>of them as they are offered.
>
>This interaction would seem to be a simple case of an adult asking for
>the advice of other adults, but the rejection of all of the presented
>ideas would suggest that there's some deeper ulterior motive.
>
>The game is not about actually receiving suggestions, but rather about
>denying them. Berne describes the interaction as one between the
>psychological parent and the psychological child:
>
> Parent: "I can make you grateful for my help."
>
> Child: "I'd like to see you try."
>
>Realistically, by initiating this game all you're really doing is
>proposing a challenge: you're saying "I have a problem, and none of
>you are wise enough to fix it." The others in the group then try, and
>one by one they are shot down.
>
>By fending off solution after solution you're also managing to show
>that you won't surrender to others. You're showing that nobody can
>offer you a reasonable solution, and subsequently that give in to a
>barrage of rationality.
>
>Luckily, the anti-thesis for this game is incredibly simple. When
>someone sets up for the game, it usually suffices to simply say
>"That's too bad". All you need to do is make it clear that you won't
>be offering any suggestions to be shot down. When the advice seeker
>sees this they will quickly lose interest or become frustrated; games
>aren't fun when you're the only player.
>
>It also works to turn the suggestions back around onto the advice
>seeker. Tell them, "That sounds awful. What are you going to do about
>it?". This shows that you're not interested in playing the game,
>causing them to defer or seek out a more willing crowd.

That describes her perfectly - or at least her principal
characteristic we see here on RFC, and goes a fair way in explaining
the origins of her pathology.

"By fending off solution after solution you're also managing to show
that you won't surrender to others" I think this goes a long, long way
in explaining Julie. It fits her perfectly.

Don't know how you came across this, but well done.