On May 21, 11:49*pm, somebody > wrote:


> What causes the perfect fart? *The kind that is a joy to release out
> into the Wild, but does not smell.


This is a very subjective topic. I don't think a fart is perfect
unless it stinks to the high heavens. I want it all - booming sound
and mushroom-cloud-like reek. If I cut a really raunchy fart in bed
you can bet I'm ducking under the covers to savor it. It can't get
strong enough to suit me. Sometimes the reek of a fart is judged
unfairly as conditions change all the time. For example, you cut a
wicked fart in a wood-paneled moving truck in the middle of summer,
it's going to hang around and steam a while in there. To me a really
smelly fart would be one you could cut while doing 80mph on a
motorcycle and still smell it. Now that is one powerful fart.

I know what you mean though, you like the boomers, and so do I.
But let's be honest, if you could have only one side of the picture
for the rest of your life - all smell, no sound - or all sound, no
smell - which would you choose? I think I'd have to go with the
smell. You could always carry a little tape-player around with fart
sounds on it so when you cut the silent stinkers all you have to do is
press a button and you've got both. This topic deserves to be over in
the sausage borsellini thread as it concerns the finery of taste and
aroma, no different from wine or brandy tasting. Sure, the fart
sniffing community is small, and connoisseurs are few and far between
- but oh what a joy it is to meet others who share my zeal. That's
the way I used to feel until I got out of the racket when I began to
lose my sense of smell and hearing a few years back. It's a young
man's game. Now get out there and show us how it's done.

TJ