"Ozgirl" > wrote in message
...
>
>
> "Julie Bove" > wrote in message
> ...
>>
>> "Ozgirl" > wrote in message
>> ...
>>>
>>>
>>> "Julie Bove" > wrote in message
>>> ...
>>>>
>>>> "Ozgirl" > wrote in message
>>>> ...
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> "Julie Bove" > wrote in message
>>>>> ...
>>>>>>
>>>>>> "Storrmmee" > wrote in message
>>>>>> ...
>>>>>>>i hope he recovers quickly, Lee
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Thanks! I hope he gets well enough to drive because my mom can't do
>>>>>> it. I don't really fancy having to drive them everywhere. When we
>>>>>> moved back here we did try to buy a house in their city but we just
>>>>>> couldn't afford it. Actually the house next door to them was for
>>>>>> sale. I did live in it once. But it has stairs and that is no good
>>>>>> for me. So we didn't consider it.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> We live far enough away from them now that it is a pain to have to
>>>>>> keep going out there. My brother and SIL do live near them but her
>>>>>> parents are both in really bad shape and they have been doing a lot
>>>>>> to help with them.
>>>>>
>>>>> Well there is still time to think about and discuss amongst yourselves
>>>>> worst case scenarios. I think if he ever drives again it might be a
>>>>> long time coming. But people adapt to that. My grandparents had to
>>>>> when it was no longer safe for my grandfather to drive (not that he
>>>>> was ever safe, but that's another story!) Once things have settled
>>>>> down I think it quite fair to say take your mum shopping for food
>>>>> every so often, pay bills whatever but not be expected to be on call
>>>>> as such. I actually think it was better you aren't living close by
>>>>> given they are a "bit" difficult. I think most aging people know there
>>>>> will come a time when life changes for them.
>>>>
>>>> My mom doesn't shop for food. And that's a problem. What little food
>>>> they do keep in the house is stuff that my dad buys. Mostly they go
>>>> out to eat. And if they don't do that he gets some sort of fast food. I
>>>> don't think there is any need to go out to pay bills. I have tried to
>>>> get them to do this online but they just refuse to do it that way.
>>>>
>>>> Mostly if they are not going out to eat they are going to the casino in
>>>> another city, to the Dr. (they have a lot of appointments between the
>>>> two of them) and to the massage therapist weekly. They also have a
>>>> maid who comes once a week and they refuse to be home when she is
>>>> there. They also go to the movies a lot too. I honestly don't know
>>>> how they afford it. We go to the movies once a month, mainly because
>>>> they want to go. We can't really afford to go much more often than
>>>> that. And we sure can't dine out as often as they do!
>>>>
>>>> I think all of their prescriptions come by mail. Not sure about the
>>>> insulin. They have my dad on some other kind with meals for now. His
>>>> BG was high when they admitted him but it was good before dinner
>>>> tonight.
>>>>
>>>> The biggest problem is that my mom doesn't do a lot of things for
>>>> herself. She just expects my dad to do these things for her. Or my
>>>> brother. Or my nephew. And she pays him to do things for her. Once in
>>>> a while she will ask me to do something for her. But I have the
>>>> mindset that I will show you once, or maybe even twice how to do
>>>> something and then you'd better be able to do it yourself! Now sure I
>>>> do make exceptions. Like I know she is going blind so if it's a matter
>>>> of having to be able to read or see something, I know she isn't
>>>> capable. But there are things that to me are simple things and she
>>>> refuses to learn how to do them. Like ordering stuff online. She has
>>>> my dad do it for her. She did have me do it once but then she freaked
>>>> when she found out how much the item cost! I had ordered this item for
>>>> her before and I thought she knew that it was expensive but I think her
>>>> memory is really going. She got very upset with me for ordering it.
>>>> So I am really torn on this. And other things involving the computer
>>>> that to me are easy to fix. She normally relies on my brother to do
>>>> computer things because he is a programmer.
>>>>
>>>> I don't think she has ever put gas in the car, taken the car for
>>>> maintenance or repairs. She has never assembled things nor has she
>>>> tried. It is just a given that my dad will do these things for her.
>>>>
>>>> We'll see. Looks like we are not in for a good time though.
>>>
>>> Well, it could be difficult but surely they expected there would come a
>>> day?...
>>
>> I don't think she ever thought of it.
>
> Well it will be a swim or sink situation especially if your dad isn't
> capable of driving anymore.

Yes. I guess we'll see how it all plays out.