"Serene Vannoy" > wrote in message
...
> Omelet wrote:
>> In article .com>,
>> "Pete C." > wrote:
>>
>>> I typically arrive an hour or so early and help with the last minute
>>> prep.
>>
>> Good for you! :-) You sound like the perfect house guest.
>
> I would not be amused if I invited someone to a dinner party and they
> showed up an hour early, unless they'd cleared it with me first.
>
>>
>> I personally like to help clean up afterwards as well. Makes me feel
>> useful.
>
> Same here, though I'm careful not to press my help on the host if they
> don't want my help.
>
>
True... typically hosts want guests to vamoose afterwards, they don't want
hangers on because often they want to relax, get out of their hosting
attire, maybe go to bed themselves, and do the clean up the next day at
their leisure. I don't want anyone cleaning my pots and pans, I'll only
have to redo it anyway. Let's make it plain so everyone can comprehend, you
want it okay that you futz around in my kitchen for an hour, then it's gotta
be okay with you that while you're stirring my pots that it's okay that your
wife spends the next hour being stirred in my bedroom by me... fair is fair.

I don't permit anyone in my kitchen before, during, or after... they'll only
be in my way... I don't want anyone peeking into my pots or oven and I
especially don't want anyone into my fridge... my kitchen is absolutely off
limits, no one goes poking into my cupboards... need something, ask! Anyone
needs extra kitchen work they can invite me to dinner at their home. I have
plenty of entertainment space in my house, a huge living room, a big den, a
dining room, a guest terlit, a deck, a patio, and acres of grounds... there
is no reason for guests to be wandering throughout the off limits portions
of my home unless they're up to no good. Every room has a door, when the
door is closed that means KEEP OUT!

Folks who want to help in the kitchen are just nosey and pushy, they tend to
make themselves too much at home... before you know it they'll be opening
doors and wandering into every room, opening closets and dresser drawers
like they live there... these types are not guests, they don't know how to
be guests, they don't want to be guests, they somehow feel being just a
guest like everyone else is demeaning, they want to feel special, they want
to be a member of your family, they gotta be very lonely, unfulfilled, and
have suffered some horrendous emotional event... these overly familiar types
have a severe mental disorder and I never reinvite them. Actually these
types have a control issue, you let them an inch into your kitchen and
within minutes they're all the way in taking over and you're out.