"modom (palindrome guy)" > wrote in message
...
> We've received word that a long-time friend was killed yesterday in a
> car wreck. She and her husband moved to Maine, her home state, after
> they retired from the university here a few years ago. They had a
> lovely, big house in a small town up there. Her husband was badly
> injured, but is expected to survive.
>
> She was an excellent cook. While she lived here, she hosted monthly
> "ladies who lunch" gatherings at her house and, less frequently,
> dinner parties for colleagues and friends. We didn't always agree
> culinarily -- she disliked chiles, for example, and was no fan of
> lobster even though she was a New Englander -- but our dinners
> together were always a treat. She was an especially gifted baker.
>
> She loved dishes and would buy a new set on impulse in spite of her
> native frugality in most matters. (She was the only person D and I
> ever heard of who saved money while working as a graduate assistant!)
> Her husband collected classical music recordings. She collected
> dinner plates and soup bowls.
>
> She was very intelligent and not just in an academic way. An
> excellent diarist, she kept in touch with friends down here via
> periodic long emails packed with telling observations about their
> lives up north. While she still lived here, she adopted a stray fox
> terrier. She trained it to do amazing tricks. While it's certainly
> true the dog was very smart, it was apparent it had an outstanding
> trainer, as well.
>
> The suddenness of her death has overwhelmed us. It can't be true that
> she is dead. With the painful loss of Christy, we were somewhat
> prepared by the duration of her hospitalization. With this new loss,
> we are left empty, uncertain what to do or say. Grief is a
> hollowness.
> --
>
> modom

The loss of friends and loved ones becomes more and more common as we age.
Do not let this fact of life overwhelm you. The best you can do in all
cases is to learn (force yourself) to CELEBRATE their lives and the time you
had with them. Good memories are our only link to immortality.

It's OK to be sad but, hold a mini wake. Toast the person & tell fond
stories.

Dimitri