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Default how can i be a pro food critic

i want to eat for a living
does a food critic make good money?

I think I know what good food and service is

for example, this pizza Im eating right now sux
but Ill need another slice to be sure

the box was real pretty, so that's good atmosphere
I was in and out of food lion in just minutes, so that's good service

i ordered (bought frozen pizza) the primo thin crust grilled chicken
ceasar pizza
by www.palermospizza.com, it tastes good when you first bite it, your
mind says.. yeah pizza but after you swallow, it has an empty finish.

it tastes alright but I wouldnt order this again
it had too much farmer-jean on it

sometimes I can overlook mediocre service if the food and atmosphere is
good

loobie

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On 2006-08-29, lubricant > wrote:
> i want to eat for a living


Who doesn't?
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lubricant wrote:
>
> i want to eat for a living
> does a food critic make good money?


You can't. To be a food critic, you first and foremost
must be a good writer. If you lack that skill,
you haven't got a chance.
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Mark Thorson wrote:

> You can't. To be a food critic, you first and foremost
> must be a good writer. If you lack that skill,
> you haven't got a chance.


i'll just forrest gump my way through it

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Tell me that you don't really shop at Food Lion. I was in the office at
a Food Lion in Sugarland, Texas when a customer brought in a carton of
milk with a dead rat in it. I saw it with my own eyes. Food Lion is so
bad that all stores around the Houston area closed.

lubricant wrote:

> i want to eat for a living
> does a food critic make good money?
>
> I think I know what good food and service is
>
> for example, this pizza Im eating right now sux
> but Ill need another slice to be sure
>
> the box was real pretty, so that's good atmosphere
> I was in and out of food lion in just minutes, so that's good service
>
> i ordered (bought frozen pizza) the primo thin crust grilled chicken
> ceasar pizza
> by www.palermospizza.com, it tastes good when you first bite it, your
> mind says.. yeah pizza but after you swallow, it has an empty finish.
>
> it tastes alright but I wouldnt order this again
> it had too much farmer-jean on it
>
> sometimes I can overlook mediocre service if the food and atmosphere is
> good
>
> loobie
>



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On Tue, 29 Aug 2006 13:23:36 -0700, lubricant wrote:

> i want to eat for a living
> does a food critic make good money?


> loobie


EVERYONE is a food critic, unless they get nutrition through a tube. Now
the money part is supply and demand ... plenty supply of critics not much
demand. Stick to bootlegging. :~P





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"lubricant" > wrote in message
oups.com...
>i want to eat for a living
> does a food critic make good money?
>
> I think I know what good food and service is
>
> for example, this pizza Im eating right now sux
> but Ill need another slice to be sure
>
> the box was real pretty, so that's good atmosphere
> I was in and out of food lion in just minutes, so that's good service
>
> i ordered (bought frozen pizza) the primo thin crust grilled chicken
> ceasar pizza
> by www.palermospizza.com, it tastes good when you first bite it, your
> mind says.. yeah pizza but after you swallow, it has an empty finish.
>
> it tastes alright but I wouldnt order this again
> it had too much farmer-jean on it
>
> sometimes I can overlook mediocre service if the food and atmosphere is
> good
>
> loobie
>

Lub is laughing because some here seem to take him seriously.


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On Tue, 29 Aug 2006 20:36:33 +0000, Glenn wrote:

> Tell me that you don't really shop at Food Lion. I was in the office at
> a Food Lion in Sugarland, Texas when a customer brought in a carton of
> milk with a dead rat in it. I saw it with my own eyes. Food Lion is so
> bad that all stores around the Houston area closed.


Isn't Sugarland in the Houston area? How did you and the customer get it,
if it was closed?
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"notbob" > wrote in message
...
> On 2006-08-29, lubricant > wrote:
> > i want to eat for a living

>
> Who doesn't?


Believe it or not, I'm not that into food. I love to talk about food, I
love to plan a menu, I love to cook, but I'd rather not eat. How weird is
that?

kili


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"lubricant" > wrote in message
ps.com...
>
> Mark Thorson wrote:
>
>> You can't. To be a food critic, you first and foremost
>> must be a good writer. If you lack that skill,
>> you haven't got a chance.

>
> i'll just forrest gump my way through it
>


It won't work. Only your mother/sister/cousin (or whoever you guess she is)
will be willing to read your gibberish.




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"jay" > wrote in message
news
> On Tue, 29 Aug 2006 20:36:33 +0000, Glenn wrote:
>
>> Tell me that you don't really shop at Food Lion. I was in the office at
>> a Food Lion in Sugarland, Texas when a customer brought in a carton of
>> milk with a dead rat in it. I saw it with my own eyes. Food Lion is so
>> bad that all stores around the Houston area closed.

>
> Isn't Sugarland in the Houston area? How did you and the customer get it,
> if it was closed?


He meant they closed based on overall bad things, not that milk. It's
unlikely that they run their own dairy farm, so the store would not be
blamed for the rat in the container.


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"jay" > wrote in message
news
> On Tue, 29 Aug 2006 20:36:33 +0000, Glenn wrote:
>
>> Tell me that you don't really shop at Food Lion. I was in the office at
>> a Food Lion in Sugarland, Texas when a customer brought in a carton of
>> milk with a dead rat in it. I saw it with my own eyes. Food Lion is so
>> bad that all stores around the Houston area closed.

>
> Isn't Sugarland in the Houston area?


Yes. And it's actually Sugar Land (two words).

Mary--lived in Sugar Land (#3 on Money Magazine's Best Places to Live
list--who knows why) for eight years; now lives in the #4 spot on the list


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On Tue, 29 Aug 2006 17:38:05 -0400, MareCat wrote:

> "jay" > wrote in message
> news
>> On Tue, 29 Aug 2006 20:36:33 +0000, Glenn wrote:
>>
>>> Tell me that you don't really shop at Food Lion. I was in the office at
>>> a Food Lion in Sugarland, Texas when a customer brought in a carton of
>>> milk with a dead rat in it. I saw it with my own eyes. Food Lion is so
>>> bad that all stores around the Houston area closed.

>>
>> Isn't Sugarland in the Houston area?

>
> Yes. And it's actually Sugar Land (two words).
>
> Mary--lived in Sugar Land (#3 on Money Magazine's Best Places to Live
> list--who knows why) for eight years; now lives in the #4 spot on the list


Thank you.. he made this whole story up... I mean he doesn't know where
he was and ALL the Food Lions are closed, but he and a customer just
happen to be in the office of one for witnessing a dead rat in a carton of
milk.

BTW..Sorry you are moving down on the list, but Md is not too bad. <G>

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JoeSpareBedroom wrote:

> It won't work. Only your mother/sister/cousin (or whoever you guess she is)
> will be willing to read your gibberish.


lmao

then we catch you scratching your head trying to wrap your little mind
around some concept i post

grow a dick one time will ya

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"lubricant" > wrote in message
oups.com...
>
> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>
>> It won't work. Only your mother/sister/cousin (or whoever you guess she
>> is)
>> will be willing to read your gibberish.

>
> lmao
>
> then we catch you scratching your head trying to wrap your little mind
> around some concept i post
>
> grow a dick one time will ya
>


As someone else pointed out, you cannot be a journalist if you can't write.
Period. End of discussion. And, don't give us any crap about how the rules
are looser in newsgroups. The rules apply everywhere.

You're probably oblivious to merchants' signs which say thing like "All
shrub's on sale today".




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JoeSpareBedroom wrote:

> You're probably oblivious to merchants' signs which say thing like "All
> shrub's on sale today".


you coulnd't express yourself out of a wet paper back
and please.. bite my ass

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lubricant, after taking an infinite amount of time, finally, on 29 Aug
2006, typed out:

>
> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>
>> You're probably oblivious to merchants' signs which say thing like "All
>> shrub's on sale today".

>
> you coulnd't express yourself out of a wet paper back
> and please.. bite my ass



You wanna be a food critic and yet you don't know shit from shinola!

Andy
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jay wrote:

> EVERYONE is a food critic, unless they get nutrition through a tube. Now
> the money part is supply and demand ... plenty supply of critics not much
> demand. Stick to bootlegging. :~P


well just for the smell of it
where would a fella start

seems like publishers play a part

I would think demographics play a part

(it's not like we have new restaurants opening around here)

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kilikini wrote:
> "notbob" > wrote in message
> ...
>> On 2006-08-29, lubricant > wrote:
>>> i want to eat for a living

>> Who doesn't?

>
> Believe it or not, I'm not that into food. I love to talk about food, I
> love to plan a menu, I love to cook, but I'd rather not eat. How weird is
> that?


<shrug> if you were younger like a teen, I'd wonder if you had control
issues or better stated "feeling lack of any control?" Bid for
attention? I dunno...? Anorexia?
If someone repeatedly talks about not eating, or forgetting to eat I'd
scratch my head and wonder...?
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"lubricant" > wrote in message
oups.com...
>
> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>
>> You're probably oblivious to merchants' signs which say thing like "All
>> shrub's on sale today".

>
> you coulnd't express yourself out of a wet paper back
> and please.. bite my ass
>


Paper back? Pot...kettle...black. :-)




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"lubricant" > wrote in message
ups.com...
>
> jay wrote:
>
>> EVERYONE is a food critic, unless they get nutrition through a tube. Now
>> the money part is supply and demand ... plenty supply of critics not much
>> demand. Stick to bootlegging. :~P

>
> well just for the smell of it
> where would a fella start
>
> seems like publishers play a part
>
> I would think demographics play a part
>
> (it's not like we have new restaurants opening around here)
>


Business usually isn't so good around trailer parks.


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Goomba38 wrote:

> <shrug> if you were younger like a teen, I'd wonder if you had control
> issues or better stated "feeling lack of any control?" Bid for
> attention? I dunno...? Anorexia?
> If someone repeatedly talks about not eating, or forgetting to eat I'd
> scratch my head and wonder...?


wow, you walked right into that one



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lubricant wrote:
> Goomba38 wrote:
>
>> <shrug> if you were younger like a teen, I'd wonder if you had control
>> issues or better stated "feeling lack of any control?" Bid for
>> attention? I dunno...? Anorexia?
>> If someone repeatedly talks about not eating, or forgetting to eat I'd
>> scratch my head and wonder...?

>
> wow, you walked right into that one
>
>
>

do you mean versus dancing around it?
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Andy wrote:
>
> You wanna be a food critic and yet you don't know shit from shinola!


If he were a good writer, that wouldn't necessarily be
fatal to his proposal.

However, not being a good writer is determining,
no matter what other skills he may have.
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"Mark Thorson" > wrote in message
...
> Andy wrote:
>>
>> You wanna be a food critic and yet you don't know shit from shinola!

>
> If he were a good writer, that wouldn't necessarily be
> fatal to his proposal.
>
> However, not being a good writer is determining,
> no matter what other skills he may have.


Exception: Gannett Corp newspapers will hire almost anyone. Here in
Rochester, the newspaper has a chair leg that writes a column.




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JoeSpareBedroom wrote:

> Business usually isn't so good around trailer parks.


so ill be a crack critic

"We tried out trailer #5 last night, woah!

First of all, we was greeted by a scuz with curlers in her hair, I big
turn off for me, but her 2 teenage daughters naivety took the edge off
of mama's ugly.

Out of nowhere we hear "SMOKE THE ROCK NIGGA:... it was the proprietors
son coming at us with a modified beer can for a crack pipe

Dishes piled up in the sink

Baby crying in the back room

BET playin in the tv

Anorexic alcoholic curler mama offering us birthday cake, I had some,
it was a little dry, but very tasty.

The blinds over the windows had been pulled open so much the part was
permanently shaped like a football

<we share another big hit off the beer can>

The man of the house finally comes out of the backroom, he was high
stepping pretending not to be drunk. we was already geeking, when he
ran the daughters off of our laps. I was hoping he would run the dog
off the couch.

I had to goto the bathroom, but I had to dance with the alien mama
first, we danced to "we want the funk" I also had another piece of
birthday cake

<we smoke another hit off the beer can>

I came out of the bathroom looked at my partner as if to say, we got to
go

I pulled the proprietor from his post at the window, stabbed his palm
with a 10 dollar bill and we headed off up the hill to my trailer.

The bathroom stunk, it smelt like vinegar
the couch was almost tacky sticky, at least the arms were

I would say the cake was pretty good, I think she told me she put
butter flavor extract into the icing... I also like how she put a
little raspberry jam between the layers. It was the pit-bulls birthday
cake.

They had one of them pictures of Jesus where the eyes light up, it was
on the whole time. I like a little touch of class for my money.

If they were to upgrade their couch to a sofa, they could get more
money for their rock. see.. a couch will hurt you when you sit down.
where' as a sofa is just sofa you"

Loobie

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In article >,
"kilikini" > wrote:

> "notbob" > wrote in message
> ...
> > On 2006-08-29, lubricant > wrote:
> > > i want to eat for a living

> >
> > Who doesn't?

>
> Believe it or not, I'm not that into food. I love to talk about food, I
> love to plan a menu, I love to cook, but I'd rather not eat. How weird is
> that?
>
> kili


That's actually been brought up before. ;-)
I can spend a couple of hours preparing an elaborate meal, then not be
interested in eating it sometimes...

Weird perhaps, but not uncommon.
--
Peace!
Om

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a Son of a bitch"
-- Jack Nicholson
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In article . com>,
"lubricant" > wrote:

> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>
> > Business usually isn't so good around trailer parks.

>
> so ill be a crack critic
>
> "We tried out trailer #5 last night, woah!
>

<snipped hilarious essay>
>
> Loobie


Hee! Looks like you _can_ write when you want to!
Very creative......
--
Peace!
Om

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a Son of a bitch"
-- Jack Nicholson
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OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:

> That's actually been brought up before. ;-)
> I can spend a couple of hours preparing an elaborate meal, then not be
> interested in eating it sometimes...
>
> Weird perhaps, but not uncommon.


maybe sometimes it's from little tastings and sneaking small bites
plus, eating slow makes you feel full

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In article .com>,
"lubricant" > wrote:

> OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
>
> > That's actually been brought up before. ;-)
> > I can spend a couple of hours preparing an elaborate meal, then not be
> > interested in eating it sometimes...
> >
> > Weird perhaps, but not uncommon.

>
> maybe sometimes it's from little tastings and sneaking small bites
> plus, eating slow makes you feel full


Indeed... ;-d
--
Peace!
Om

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a Son of a bitch"
-- Jack Nicholson


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> i want to eat for a living
> does a food critic make good money?


How about just printing up some business cards, and just go for the free
meal...?
A good start, anyway....

Then write a critique and see if you can sell it...


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OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:

> Hee! Looks like you _can_ write when you want to!
> Very creative......
> --


well thanks

I think I need an edirot

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"OmManiPadmeOmelet" > wrote in message
news
> In article >,
> "kilikini" > wrote:
>
> > "notbob" > wrote in message
> > ...
> > > On 2006-08-29, lubricant > wrote:
> > > > i want to eat for a living
> > >
> > > Who doesn't?

> >
> > Believe it or not, I'm not that into food. I love to talk about food, I
> > love to plan a menu, I love to cook, but I'd rather not eat. How weird

is
> > that?
> >
> > kili

>
> That's actually been brought up before. ;-)
> I can spend a couple of hours preparing an elaborate meal, then not be
> interested in eating it sometimes...
>
> Weird perhaps, but not uncommon.
> --


I think it's because you get tired of smelling what you're cooking, I dunno.
I'll spend hours cooking, as well, and not eat a bite. My favorite time to
eat (my only time, really) is about 11 am and then it's usually leftovers,
or a bowl of steamed veggies, ramen noodles, soup, a potato and then I'm
done for the day. I always make a full meal for my husband in the evening,
though. I just don't eat it.

kili


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On Wed, 30 Aug 2006 03:22:43 +0000, ~-x-y-~ wrote:



> How about just printing up some business cards, and just go for the free
> meal...?


Restaurant owners don't usually give free meals to those that wish to eat
and kibitz. And critics in order to experience the real meal deal don't
announce their arrival or intentions.
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jay wrote:

> Restaurant owners don't usually give free meals to those that wish to eat
> and kibitz. And critics in order to experience the real meal deal don't
> announce their arrival or intentions.


right, that's why i figured publishers actually pay the critics



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On Wed, 30 Aug 2006 07:33:41 -0700, lubricant wrote:

>
> jay wrote:
>
>> Restaurant owners don't usually give free meals to those that wish to eat
>> and kibitz. And critics in order to experience the real meal deal don't
>> announce their arrival or intentions.

>
> right, that's why i figured publishers actually pay the critics


http://www.ehow.com/how_8535_be-food-critic.html



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"OmManiPadmeOmelet" > wrote in message
news
> In article >,
> "kilikini" > wrote:
>
> > "notbob" > wrote in message
> > ...
> > > On 2006-08-29, lubricant > wrote:
> > > > i want to eat for a living
> > >
> > > Who doesn't?

> >
> > Believe it or not, I'm not that into food. I love to talk about food, I
> > love to plan a menu, I love to cook, but I'd rather not eat. How weird

is
> > that?
> >
> > kili

>
> That's actually been brought up before. ;-)
> I can spend a couple of hours preparing an elaborate meal, then not be
> interested in eating it sometimes...
>
> Weird perhaps, but not uncommon.
> --
> Peace!
> Om
>
> "My mother never saw the irony in calling me a Son of a bitch"
> -- Jack Nicholson


best diets i ever was on were when I worked in food service. After putting
in 8+ hours prepping food, I wanted little to do with it after work.
-ginny


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"lubricant" > wrote in message
oups.com...
>
> jay wrote:
>
>> Restaurant owners don't usually give free meals to those that wish to eat
>> and kibitz. And critics in order to experience the real meal deal don't
>> announce their arrival or intentions.

>
> right, that's why i figured publishers actually pay the critics
>


That response in no way addresses what Jay said (which is correct). And, the
fact that a publisher pays the writer is not related to whether the
restaurant lets the writer eat for free.

Thanks for playing, though.


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"JoeSpareBedroom" > wrote in message
...
> "lubricant" > wrote in message
> oups.com...
> >
> > jay wrote:
> >
> >> Restaurant owners don't usually give free meals to those that wish to

eat
> >> and kibitz. And critics in order to experience the real meal deal

don't
> >> announce their arrival or intentions.

> >
> > right, that's why i figured publishers actually pay the critics
> >

>
> That response in no way addresses what Jay said (which is correct). And,

the
> fact that a publisher pays the writer is not related to whether the
> restaurant lets the writer eat for free.
>


So do you live in your Mom's spare bedroom?



--
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Default how can i be a pro food critic


"lubricant" > wrote in message
ups.com...
>
> OmManiPadmeOmelet wrote:
>
> > Hee! Looks like you _can_ write when you want to!
> > Very creative......
> > --

>
> well thanks
>
> I think I need an edirot
>


I will etid you! Let me! Lte meeeeee!



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