Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

http://www.slashfood.com/2005/11/02/...-really-homema
de/2/#comments

by Sarah Gilbert

In search of some Halloween TV that didn't include blood and gore, my
three-year-old and I finally chose the Food Network on Sunday afternoon. After
a blood-sugar-rush special on the All-Candy Expo, Sandra Lee was throwing a
Halloween party in a rented mansion for her Semi-Homemade show. I was lazy. And
I love parties. So I kept watching.


I can't stand the show for many reasons, not least of which is Sandra's love
for her beautemous self. She had at least five costume changes, none of which
looked so much like the thing she was dressing up as, as the costume that a
showgirl might wear if she were appearing as (for instance) a princess, or a
sugar-plum fairy. Gag.

But why I really can't stand the show: it would be far easier, not to mention
vastly cheaper, not to mention far healthier for your party guests, to make
things really homemade instead of Semi-Homemade.

Let's take her pumpkin cheesecake petit fours. I imagined she'd take a
cheesecake mix and add some canned pumpkin. Not Sandra Lee. She painstakingly
made teensy tart shells out of a mixture of sugar cookie mix, cream cheese, and
a panoply of other ingredients, far more than belong in traditional pte
sucrée. This would take a normal cook an hour, if not more, for the 12 or 15
mini tart shells (which would feed, I'd imagine, three or four party guests).

Then we come to the filling. I thought my eyes were going to pop out of my head
when she pulled out a storebought pumpkin pie and started scooping out the
innards. "Save the shell and crumble it on ice cream!" she trilled. "This is so
easy!"

She poured heavy cream into the bowl containing the pumpkin pie guts, and then
pulled out a storebought cheesecake (approximate price at Costco: $12.99). And
started scooping out its guts, too, to go in a separate bowl, also mixed with a
bit of whipping cream. "This crust can go on ice cream, too!" she said, her
voice getting higher-pitched with each word.

OK, so this is ridiculous. But then... the tour de force. Three. Separate.
Piping. Bags. Made, of course, out of large plastic Ziplock bags, useless after
their last hurrah distributing $25 worth of pumpkin cheesecake filling into 12
tiny tart shells. For some reason, see, Sandra felt it necessary to have some
filled with both pumpkin AND cheesecake, some with just pumpkin, some with just
cheesecake.

Why? Why? Why? It would have been just as quick to make tart crusts from flour,
butter and water, and mix cream cheese with pumpkin puree and sugar. No,
quicker. It would have cost $4 or $5 instead of $25 or $30. And it would have
probably tasted better. What is the point, Sandra?

I won't even get into the Green Ghoulade, made with green Gatorade, limeade,
and... oh, God, I can't even finish typing this crap. Sandra, please, find a
new career as a showgirl and leave the cooking to people who actually cook.



--
"Bunny's ability to take ingredients that I love and put them together into
something stomach wrenching is unparalleled." -- bookwirm

Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

in article , Ubiquitous at
wrote on 11/4/05 7:21 AM:

>
http://www.slashfood.com/2005/11/02/...-it-really-hom
em> a
> de/2/#comments
>
> by Sarah Gilbert

Wow Ubi

You've got competition!

:-)

--

You Can't Stop the Signal

Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

In article >,
Ubiquitous > wrote:

> http://www.slashfood.com/2005/11/02/...t-really-homem
> a
> de/2/#comments
>
> by Sarah Gilbert
>
> In search of some Halloween TV that didn't include blood and gore, my
> three-year-old and I finally chose the Food Network on Sunday afternoon.
> After
> a blood-sugar-rush special on the All-Candy Expo, Sandra Lee was throwing a
> Halloween party in a rented mansion for her Semi-Homemade show. I was lazy.
> And
> I love parties. So I kept watching.
>
>
> I can't stand the show for many reasons, not least of which is Sandra's love
> for her beautemous self. She had at least five costume changes, none of which
> looked so much like the thing she was dressing up as, as the costume that a
> showgirl might wear if she were appearing as (for instance) a princess, or a
> sugar-plum fairy. Gag.
>
> But why I really can't stand the show: it would be far easier, not to mention
> vastly cheaper, not to mention far healthier for your party guests, to make
> things really homemade instead of Semi-Homemade.
>
> Let's take her pumpkin cheesecake petit fours. I imagined she'd take a
> cheesecake mix and add some canned pumpkin. Not Sandra Lee. She painstakingly
> made teensy tart shells out of a mixture of sugar cookie mix, cream cheese,
> and
> a panoply of other ingredients, far more than belong in traditional pte
> sucrée. This would take a normal cook an hour, if not more, for the 12 or 15
> mini tart shells (which would feed, I'd imagine, three or four party guests).
>
> Then we come to the filling. I thought my eyes were going to pop out of my
> head
> when she pulled out a storebought pumpkin pie and started scooping out the
> innards. "Save the shell and crumble it on ice cream!" she trilled. "This is
> so
> easy!"
>
> She poured heavy cream into the bowl containing the pumpkin pie guts, and
> then
> pulled out a storebought cheesecake (approximate price at Costco: $12.99).
> And
> started scooping out its guts, too, to go in a separate bowl, also mixed with
> a
> bit of whipping cream. "This crust can go on ice cream, too!" she said, her
> voice getting higher-pitched with each word.
>
> OK, so this is ridiculous. But then... the tour de force. Three. Separate.
> Piping. Bags. Made, of course, out of large plastic Ziplock bags, useless
> after
> their last hurrah distributing $25 worth of pumpkin cheesecake filling into
> 12
> tiny tart shells. For some reason, see, Sandra felt it necessary to have some
> filled with both pumpkin AND cheesecake, some with just pumpkin, some with
> just
> cheesecake.
>
> Why? Why? Why? It would have been just as quick to make tart crusts from
> flour,
> butter and water, and mix cream cheese with pumpkin puree and sugar. No,
> quicker. It would have cost $4 or $5 instead of $25 or $30. And it would have
> probably tasted better. What is the point, Sandra?
>
> I won't even get into the Green Ghoulade, made with green Gatorade, limeade,
> and... oh, God, I can't even finish typing this crap. Sandra, please, find a
> new career as a showgirl and leave the cooking to people who actually cook.

I have to agree! Man that sounds expensive!!!
Even using boxed puddings would have been cheaper and just as easy! :-(
You can mix pumpkin puree with boxed vanilla pudding and cream cheese,
whip together, add additional sugar to taste and voila!

Simple little gram cracker crusts work too. Mix gram cracker crumbs
(preferably chocolate) with melted butter. QED.

Yeesh!
--
Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson

Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

Wow--after reading this article (which is very well written), I must
say I'm now convinced--SL has jumped the shark and is peddling crap
advice. Nothing wrong with incorporating convenience foods into
cooking as long as a) they save the cook time and effort, and b) save
the cook some money. SL's technique here does neither. If every show
is like this one, then Sandra does need to move on and find something
else to do.

Sad.

Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

"tsr3" > wrote in message
oups.com...
> Wow--after reading this article (which is very well written), I must
> say I'm now convinced--SL has jumped the shark and is peddling crap
> advice. Nothing wrong with incorporating convenience foods into
> cooking as long as a) they save the cook time and effort, and b) save
> the cook some money. SL's technique here does neither. If every show
> is like this one, then Sandra does need to move on and find something
> else to do.
>
> Sad.
>


WOW Holey Horror!! Sad, Sad, George and Martha sad,sad

Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

"Ubiquitous" > wrote in message
...
> http://www.slashfood.com/2005/11/02/...-really-homema
> de/2/#comments
>
> by Sarah Gilbert
>
> In search of some Halloween TV that didn't include blood and gore, my
> three-year-old and I finally chose the Food Network on Sunday afternoon.
> After
> a blood-sugar-rush special on the All-Candy Expo, Sandra Lee was throwing
> a
> Halloween party in a rented mansion for her Semi-Homemade show. I was
> lazy. And
> I love parties. So I kept watching.
>
>
> I can't stand the show for many reasons, not least of which is Sandra's
> love
> for her beautemous self. She had at least five costume changes, none of
> which
> looked so much like the thing she was dressing up as, as the costume that
> a
> showgirl might wear if she were appearing as (for instance) a princess, or
> a
> sugar-plum fairy. Gag.
>
> But why I really can't stand the show: it would be far easier, not to
> mention
> vastly cheaper, not to mention far healthier for your party guests, to
> make
> things really homemade instead of Semi-Homemade.
>
> Let's take her pumpkin cheesecake petit fours. I imagined she'd take a
> cheesecake mix and add some canned pumpkin. Not Sandra Lee. She
> painstakingly
> made teensy tart shells out of a mixture of sugar cookie mix, cream
> cheese, and
> a panoply of other ingredients, far more than belong in traditional pte
> sucrée. This would take a normal cook an hour, if not more, for the 12 or
> 15
> mini tart shells (which would feed, I'd imagine, three or four party
> guests).
>
> Then we come to the filling. I thought my eyes were going to pop out of my
> head
> when she pulled out a storebought pumpkin pie and started scooping out the
> innards. "Save the shell and crumble it on ice cream!" she trilled. "This
> is so
> easy!"
>
> She poured heavy cream into the bowl containing the pumpkin pie guts, and
> then
> pulled out a storebought cheesecake (approximate price at Costco: $12.99).
> And
> started scooping out its guts, too, to go in a separate bowl, also mixed
> with a
> bit of whipping cream. "This crust can go on ice cream, too!" she said,
> her
> voice getting higher-pitched with each word.
>
> OK, so this is ridiculous. But then... the tour de force. Three. Separate.
> Piping. Bags. Made, of course, out of large plastic Ziplock bags, useless
> after
> their last hurrah distributing $25 worth of pumpkin cheesecake filling
> into 12
> tiny tart shells. For some reason, see, Sandra felt it necessary to have
> some
> filled with both pumpkin AND cheesecake, some with just pumpkin, some with
> just
> cheesecake.
>
> Why? Why? Why? It would have been just as quick to make tart crusts from
> flour,
> butter and water, and mix cream cheese with pumpkin puree and sugar. No,
> quicker. It would have cost $4 or $5 instead of $25 or $30. And it would
> have
> probably tasted better. What is the point, Sandra?
>
> I won't even get into the Green Ghoulade, made with green Gatorade,
> limeade,
> and... oh, God, I can't even finish typing this crap. Sandra, please, find
> a
> new career as a showgirl and leave the cooking to people who actually
> cook.
>
==========

Oh my gosh... soooooo funny! Yep. DH and I watched this episode too... I
thought my spouse was going to have a heart attack when she started scooping
the cheesecake. LOL He looked at me and said, "Now I understand why your
news group calls her "Slop" "! He also said he wanted to get up and stop
watching her but that it was like a bad car accident where you just can't
help but to look. <snort>

Too funny.

--
Syssi

Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

I too am astonished that anyone would ever want to cook that way.
I prefer real ingredients for ingredients as John Belushi once said.
I've spend the last 10 years trying to get away from the stuff
she slings around and into her foods. Things that make sense
to a chemist, but not on his table. This show is a real disservice
to the public, IMO.
SD


Roy Knable wrote:
> "Ubiquitous" > wrote in message
> ...
> > Why? Why? Why? It would have been just as quick to make tart crusts from
> > flour,
> > butter and water, and mix cream cheese with pumpkin puree and sugar. No,
> > quicker. It would have cost $4 or $5 instead of $25 or $30. And it would
> > have
> > probably tasted better. What is the point, Sandra?
>
> Because Food Network doesn't want their shows to conflict. To learn
> how to make good dishes quickly and easily from scratch (most of the
> time), you're supposed to watch Good Eats, the thinking cook's show.

Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

> wrote in message
ps.com...
>I too am astonished that anyone would ever want to cook that way.
> I prefer real ingredients for ingredients as John Belushi once said.
> I've spend the last 10 years trying to get away from the stuff
> she slings around and into her foods. Things that make sense
> to a chemist, but not on his table. This show is a real disservice
> to the public, IMO.
> SD
>
>
> Roy Knable wrote:
>> "Ubiquitous" > wrote in message
>> ...
>> > Why? Why? Why? It would have been just as quick to make tart crusts
>> > from
>> > flour,
>> > butter and water, and mix cream cheese with pumpkin puree and sugar.
>> > No,
>> > quicker. It would have cost $4 or $5 instead of $25 or $30. And it
>> > would
>> > have
>> > probably tasted better. What is the point, Sandra?
>>
>> Because Food Network doesn't want their shows to conflict. To learn
>> how to make good dishes quickly and easily from scratch (most of the
>> time), you're supposed to watch Good Eats, the thinking cook's show.
>


FO

Semi-Homemade - why not make it Really Homemade?
 

"Ubiquitous" > wrote in message
...
> http://www.slashfood.com/2005/11/02/...-really-homema
> de/2/#comments
>
> by Sarah Gilbert
>
> In search of some Halloween TV that didn't include blood and gore, my
> three-year-old and I finally chose the Food Network on Sunday afternoon.
> After
> a blood-sugar-rush special on the All-Candy Expo, Sandra Lee was throwing
> a
> Halloween party in a rented mansion for her Semi-Homemade show. I was
> lazy. And
> I love parties. So I kept watching.
>
>
> I can't stand the show for many reasons, not least of which is Sandra's
> love
> for her beautemous self. She had at least five costume changes, none of
> which
> looked so much like the thing she was dressing up as, as the costume that
> a
> showgirl might wear if she were appearing as (for instance) a princess, or
> a
> sugar-plum fairy. Gag.
>
> But why I really can't stand the show: it would be far easier, not to
> mention
> vastly cheaper, not to mention far healthier for your party guests, to
> make
> things really homemade instead of Semi-Homemade.
>
> Let's take her pumpkin cheesecake petit fours. I imagined she'd take a
> cheesecake mix and add some canned pumpkin. Not Sandra Lee. She
> painstakingly
> made teensy tart shells out of a mixture of sugar cookie mix, cream
> cheese, and
> a panoply of other ingredients, far more than belong in traditional pte
> sucrée. This would take a normal cook an hour, if not more, for the 12 or
> 15
> mini tart shells (which would feed, I'd imagine, three or four party
> guests).
>
> Then we come to the filling. I thought my eyes were going to pop out of my
> head
> when she pulled out a storebought pumpkin pie and started scooping out the
> innards. "Save the shell and crumble it on ice cream!" she trilled. "This
> is so
> easy!"
>
> She poured heavy cream into the bowl containing the pumpkin pie guts, and
> then
> pulled out a storebought cheesecake (approximate price at Costco: $12.99).
> And
> started scooping out its guts, too, to go in a separate bowl, also mixed
> with a
> bit of whipping cream. "This crust can go on ice cream, too!" she said,
> her
> voice getting higher-pitched with each word.
>
> OK, so this is ridiculous. But then... the tour de force. Three. Separate.
> Piping. Bags. Made, of course, out of large plastic Ziplock bags, useless
> after
> their last hurrah distributing $25 worth of pumpkin cheesecake filling
> into 12
> tiny tart shells. For some reason, see, Sandra felt it necessary to have
> some
> filled with both pumpkin AND cheesecake, some with just pumpkin, some with
> just
> cheesecake.
>
> Why? Why? Why? It would have been just as quick to make tart crusts from
> flour,
> butter and water, and mix cream cheese with pumpkin puree and sugar. No,
> quicker. It would have cost $4 or $5 instead of $25 or $30. And it would
> have
> probably tasted better. What is the point, Sandra?
>
> I won't even get into the Green Ghoulade, made with green Gatorade,
> limeade,
> and... oh, God, I can't even finish typing this crap. Sandra, please, find
> a
> new career as a showgirl and leave the cooking to people who actually
> cook.
>
>
>
> --
> "Bunny's ability to take ingredients that I love and put them together
> into
> something stomach wrenching is unparalleled." -- bookwirm
>
>


FO FO