On getting rid of "ToxiStew" (unwanted food)
 

Etiquette column. It's the second letter down.

http://www.bostonglobe.com/magazine/...cWJ/story.html

Why does ANYONE think other people want their leftovers - or expired
food? Assuming the food wasn't praised or asked for?


Lenona.

On getting rid of "ToxiStew" (unwanted food)
 

> wrote in message
...
> Etiquette column. It's the second letter down.
>
> http://www.bostonglobe.com/magazine/...cWJ/story.html
>
> Why does ANYONE think other people want their leftovers - or expired
> food? Assuming the food wasn't praised or asked for?
>
>
> Lenona.

I know of people who do that. They think they are helping. I don't get it.

On getting rid of "ToxiStew" (unwanted food)
 

On 7/18/2014 12:59 PM, wrote:
> Etiquette column. It's the second letter down.
>
> http://www.bostonglobe.com/magazine/...cWJ/story.html
>
> Why does ANYONE think other people want their leftovers - or expired
> food? Assuming the food wasn't praised or asked for?
>
>
> Lenona.
>
Perhaps the MIL is under the impression they are in a financial hardship
situation. Why else would she drive from another town on a regular
basis to deliver this so-called "stew"? There's got to be more to the
story than what the letter writing is saying. Maybe they're always
hitting her up for money. <shrug>

Jill

On getting rid of "ToxiStew" (unwanted food)
 

wrote:
> Etiquette column. It's the second letter down.
>
> http://www.bostonglobe.com/magazine/...cWJ/story.html
>
> Why does ANYONE think other people want their leftovers - or expired
> food? Assuming the food wasn't praised or asked for?
>
>
> Lenona.

I buy day-old food at the grocery store - it's fine. Expiration dates
are somewhat arbitrary and usually overly cautious, in my experience.

-S-

On getting rid of "ToxiStew" (unwanted food)
 

"Steve Freides" > wrote in message
...
> wrote:
>> Etiquette column. It's the second letter down.
>>
>> http://www.bostonglobe.com/magazine/...cWJ/story.html
>>
>> Why does ANYONE think other people want their leftovers - or expired
>> food? Assuming the food wasn't praised or asked for?
>>
>>
>> Lenona.
>
> I buy day-old food at the grocery store - it's fine. Expiration dates are
> somewhat arbitrary and usually overly cautious, in my experience.
>
> -S-

But buying it isn't the same as taking it to someone else. My MIL often had
people taking her leftovers, even when they were just tiny bits of things.
Yes, she was disabled. Yes, she couldn't cook any more. But she had people
shopping for her and doing the cooking. When I did the cooking and knew
that I wouldn't be back for three weeks, I made plenty of extra for the
freezer. But I never once thought to clean out my fridge and bring bits of
old stuff to her.

On getting rid of "ToxiStew" (unwanted food)
 

On 7/19/2014 7:24 AM, jmcquown wrote:
> On 7/18/2014 12:59 PM, wrote:
>> Etiquette column. It's the second letter down.
>>
>> http://www.bostonglobe.com/magazine/...cWJ/story.html
>>
>>
>> Why does ANYONE think other people want their leftovers - or expired
>> food? Assuming the food wasn't praised or asked for?
>>
>>
>> Lenona.
>>
> Perhaps the MIL is under the impression they are in a financial
> hardship situation. Why else would she drive from another town on a
> regular basis to deliver this so-called "stew"? There's got to be
> more to the story than what the letter writing is saying. Maybe
> they're always hitting her up for money. <shrug>
>

The letter writer's MIL is likely a hoarder and/or compulsive spender.
At least, her actions are the same as the two hoarders/compulsive
spenders I know. One of them is particularly fixated on accumulating
quantities of food goods from outlets and other questionable-but-cheap
sources. He tries to justify his compulsion by giving some of his
accumulated food to his children, who are financially well-to-do and
are horrified by the very idea of eating that stuff. They have been
unable to make him stop buying and giving them this junk, just as they
were unable to stop his wife (the husband's mom) while she was alive
from bringing them their half-rotted leftovers found in the back of
their fridge. She just couldn't bring herself to throw "good food
they'd paid for" away, but even they wouldn't eat it - so, they'd give
it away. It's not an insult, it's a manifestation of their mental illness.

She even showed up once on my doorstep with a bag of her spoiling
fridge leftovers as a 'gift'. Yeah, I was offended, but I also knew
she was nuts, so I didn't tell her off. You can't change their
behavior, so all you can do is find the simplest way to deal with it,
which is usually just pitching their garbage 'gifts' as soon as they
leave.