OT.....So much we are denying ourselves......
 

OT....Laugh for the day....So much we are denying ourselves :-)

I Love this Doctor!



Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this
true?
A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on
exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you
live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want
to live longer? Take nap.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Brandy distilled wine, that mean they take
water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also
made of grain. Bottom up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you
have two body, your ratio two to one.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise
program?
A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No pain...good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more
vegetable be bad?

Q : Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the
middle?
A: Oh no! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing
sit-up if you want bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good
food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.

Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is shape!

Well... I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about
food and diets.

And remember:
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving
safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in
sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly
used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!"

AND.....

For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition
and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting
nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than
Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than
Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks
than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than
Americans...

5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and
suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what
kills you.


Barry Oz

OT.....So much we are denying ourselves......
 

On 2012-06-05, Bigbazza > wrote:
> OT....Laugh for the day....So much we are denying ourselves :-)
>
> I Love this Doctor!

> CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what
> kills you.

Cute.

I DO believe it's the stress Americans put themselves through that
kills them, not the food/drink/exercise stuff. I remember the last
time I worked a full time job, I was working in 50-70 hrs wk and
commuting another 10-15. I was getting less than 5 hrs sleep per
night. Not cuz I didn't have the time, but jes couldn't sleep. Toss
n' turn all night, wake up after 3 hrs. The stress was killing me.

I haven't worked in 14 yrs. Loving it! ;)

nb

--
vi --the heart of evil!
Support labeling GMOs
<http://www.labelgmos.org/>

OT.....So much we are denying ourselves......
 

On 05/06/2012 9:46 AM, notbob wrote:

> I DO believe it's the stress Americans put themselves through that
> kills them, not the food/drink/exercise stuff. I remember the last
> time I worked a full time job, I was working in 50-70 hrs wk and
> commuting another 10-15. I was getting less than 5 hrs sleep per
> night. Not cuz I didn't have the time, but jes couldn't sleep. Toss
> n' turn all night, wake up after 3 hrs. The stress was killing me.
>
> I haven't worked in 14 yrs. Loving it! ;)
>

7 years, 11 months and 5 days for me. But whose counting.

A couple weeks ago was chatting with a guy down the road who has had
three bypass operations. He was sympathetic about my situation and
thought that I had had a high stress job. Odd. I rarely felt stressed at
work. There were times that there were adrenaline rushes, but the fact
is that I rarely felt stressed at work. I loved my job. I used to get up
and head off to work with no dread at all.

OT.....So much we are denying ourselves......
 

On 2012-06-05, Dave Smith > wrote:

> is that I rarely felt stressed at work. I loved my job. I used to get up
> and head off to work with no dread at all.

Oh, I loved my job, too, Dave. My last job was one of the great
periods in my life and I miss it sorely. OTOH, I think it was the
commuting and stress of living in the high pop environment that
stressed me out. There were a lot of things I loved about living in
the San Francisco Bay Area (SFBA), but it was killing me. Of that I
have no doubt. Now, here in Nosepick CO, too small to even have a
population sign, I flourish. You couldn't get me back to CA at
gunpoint. ;)

nb


--
vi --the heart of evil!
Support labeling GMOs
<http://www.labelgmos.org/>

OT.....So much we are denying ourselves......
 

notbob wrote:
>
> Now, here in Nosepick CO, too small to even have a
> population sign, I flourish. You couldn't get me back to CA at
> gunpoint. ;)

Nosepick, CO. Wow!@ You need to look up the origin of your town's name and
report back here. hahahaha The name decribes the occasion...I'm just
wondering if some famous person got caught doing that? ;)

Gary

OT.....So much we are denying ourselves......
 

On 6/4/2012 11:26 PM, Bigbazza wrote:
> OT....Laugh for the day....So much we are denying ourselves :-)
>
> I Love this Doctor!


> CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently
> what kills you.

LOL! I like it.

OT.....So much we are denying ourselves......
 

On 6/5/2012 9:46 AM, notbob wrote:
> I DO believe it's the stress Americans put themselves through that
> kills them, not the food/drink/exercise stuff. I remember the last
> time I worked a full time job, I was working in 50-70 hrs wk and
> commuting another 10-15. I was getting less than 5 hrs sleep per
> night. Not cuz I didn't have the time, but jes couldn't sleep. Toss
> n' turn all night, wake up after 3 hrs. The stress was killing me.

you just described me.