The audience applauds and yells, "Troll! Troll! Troll!"

"Max Hiligman" > wrote in message
...
> **********Sorry this is lengthy**********
> What do you do with a wife who is a gross diabetic. She refuses to
> diet and weighs 251 pounds is 5'6" tall and as round as a ball. She is
> refuses to diet, exercise or move off her damn chair or couch.
> In checking out my computer I see she has visited here a couple of
> times so she may have some interest in improving herself.
> She sees her doctors at least three times a month. Endocrinologist,
> Internal Medicine and Allergist. They all have tried to tell her that
> she will die a horrible lingering death if she doesn't get control.
> I have purchased her a Medtronics pump and all the supporting
> necessities. I have paid for a CDE to instruct her not once but at
> least four times on diet and use of this pump.
> She used it a few weeks and then took it off because she didn't like
> the way it felt. It did improve her Hemoglobin 1C to 7.9 down from a
> previous 11.7. But she didn't like it.
> Now she is back on Insulin (Novolog 35units 3 times a day with meals)
> (Langus 80units at 11pm) sorry I am not certain if that is units, cc's
> or mg. This is what she injects according to her log. She is also
> supposed to adhere to an 1800 calorie diet, personally I think it must
> be around 8000. I really am not around a lot for dinner so she has that
> on her own so she can push anything she wants in her mouth even with the
> prepared and delivered meals. Who knows. I have seen her eat a whole
> baguette slathered in butter at one sitting^^^^
> She has seen a Psychiatrist for over two years and she deals with a
> number of people who have Diabetes and other chronic diseases.
> Evidently this wife doesn't chose to care for herself.
> She is a great cook and we have wonderful meals. We entertain a lot
> and everyone always wants to attend our dinners and parties.
> I have gone so far to hire people to deliver proper meals seven days
> a week and they are calibrated to her diet as prescribed by her dietitian.
> She eats them and then I find cakes, cookies, ice cream in the fridge.
> I have just about given up. I don't want to live any longer with
> this very obese and loathsome creature who refuses to care for herself
> no matter what is done for her.
> It has cost me thousands of dollars to try and get her on the road
> but I have reached the end of mine.
> I have given her until the end of this month to get it together or
> she goes.
> ****Any suggestions*****
> Max

"Smicker" > wrote in message
om...
> On 12 Jun 2004 00:47:09 GMT, (D0RAJARR) wrote:

*snipped for the sake of hygiene
>
> My old boss in London would never hire a fat person. He said that they
> couldn't rely on themselves, they had no order or discipline in their
> lives and he sure as hell wasn't going to bring someone like that into
> the firm just so they could stuff our lives up too. I agree with him.
> The few places that I have worked where there were really obese
> employees, they never did their work properly, they were always late
> with everything and they blamed everyone around them for everything
> that went wrong, even when it could have been no one but themselves
> that caused it.
>
> Fat usually equates with slack and lazy. There are very few
> exceptions.
>
> smicker

Ahhhh, yes, the "I hate fat people" approach. Just for the sake of
argument, let's substitute the words "blacks" or "women" or "jews" or "gays"
or "southerners". Bigotry is bigotry is bigotry. Just remember, a fat
person can always lose weight, but you will forever remain stupid.

"surprise lady" > wrote in message >...
> "Smicker" > wrote in message
> om...
> > On 12 Jun 2004 00:47:09 GMT, (D0RAJARR) wrote:
>
> *snipped for the sake of hygiene
> >
> > My old boss in London would never hire a fat person. He said that they
> > couldn't rely on themselves, they had no order or discipline in their
> > lives and he sure as hell wasn't going to bring someone like that into
> > the firm just so they could stuff our lives up too. I agree with him.
> > The few places that I have worked where there were really obese
> > employees, they never did their work properly, they were always late
> > with everything and they blamed everyone around them for everything
> > that went wrong, even when it could have been no one but themselves
> > that caused it.
> >
> > Fat usually equates with slack and lazy. There are very few
> > exceptions.
> >
> > smicker
>
> Ahhhh, yes, the "I hate fat people" approach.

No, it is the "I have abolutely no respect or time for lazy and
indulgent people".

Just for the sake of
> argument, let's substitute the words "blacks" or "women" or "jews" or "gays"
> or "southerners".

Why? I have nothing against blacks, women, jews, gays, or southerners.
Unless they are fat lazy slobs.

Bigotry is bigotry is bigotry.

Bigotry is unreasonable prejudice. Mine is well reasoned.

Just remember, a fat
> person can always lose weight, but you will forever remain stupid.

First I would have to become stupid in order to remain that way, and
that isn't likely to happen, unless perhaps by osmosis from some of
the slow witted dupes on these newsgroups. Do you believe in osmosis?

Do you have anything intelligent to say? Something that isn't
childish, something that might actually be construed as reasoned
argument?

No?

Much as I expected.

smicker

>
>And under your and your previous bosses guidelines, therefore lazy
and
>unhireable.
>
>That is what I was referring to.
>
>Jennifer

Churchill didn't become fat until he got old. Different thing
altogether. I am ****ed off with those pre-menapausal women who look
like the Michelin man's mother. Old people with naturally slowing
metabolisms have an excuse, 30/40 somethings don't. Fat 20 somethings
are totally disgusting.


smicker

"Smicker" > wrote in message
om...
> "surprise lady" > wrote in message
>...
> > "Smicker" > wrote in message
> > om...
> > > On 12 Jun 2004 00:47:09 GMT, (D0RAJARR) wrote:
> >
> > *snipped for the sake of hygiene
> > >
> > > My old boss in London would never hire a fat person. He said that they
> > > couldn't rely on themselves, they had no order or discipline in their
> > > lives and he sure as hell wasn't going to bring someone like that into
> > > the firm just so they could stuff our lives up too. I agree with him.
> > > The few places that I have worked where there were really obese
> > > employees, they never did their work properly, they were always late
> > > with everything and they blamed everyone around them for everything
> > > that went wrong, even when it could have been no one but themselves
> > > that caused it.
> > >
> > > Fat usually equates with slack and lazy. There are very few
> > > exceptions.
> > >
> > > smicker
> >
> > Ahhhh, yes, the "I hate fat people" approach.
>
> No, it is the "I have abolutely no respect or time for lazy and
> indulgent people".
>
> Just for the sake of
> > argument, let's substitute the words "blacks" or "women" or "jews" or
"gays"
> > or "southerners".
>
> Why? I have nothing against blacks, women, jews, gays, or southerners.
> Unless they are fat lazy slobs.
>
> Bigotry is bigotry is bigotry.
>
> Bigotry is unreasonable prejudice. Mine is well reasoned.
>
> Just remember, a fat
> > person can always lose weight, but you will forever remain stupid.
>
> First I would have to become stupid in order to remain that way, and
> that isn't likely to happen, unless perhaps by osmosis from some of
> the slow witted dupes on these newsgroups. Do you believe in osmosis?
>
> Do you have anything intelligent to say? Something that isn't
> childish, something that might actually be construed as reasoned
> argument?
>
> No?
>
> Much as I expected.
>
> smicker


Smicker too bad you can't see yourself as others see you.
Prejudice is always ultimately unproductive, among other things.

--
Regards,
Evelyn

(to reply to me personally, remove 'sox")

Max Hiligman > wrote in message >...

> **********Sorry this is lengthy**********
> What do you do with a wife who is a gross diabetic.
> She refuses to diet and weighs 251 pounds is 5'6" tall and
> as round as a ball.

> She is refuses to diet, exercise or move off her damn chair
> or couch.

You have gotten a lot of advice about how & why she should
take care of herself, but both you and her already knew that.
I am going to give you a different suggestion which I think
will get to the root of the problem.
Diabetes is such an all-encompassing condition that many
factors which are not related directly to the medical part
of treatment, do, in fact, affect us.
I believe that this is an issue, in the case of your wife.

She doesn't feel good about herself, and probably didn't
before the diabetes was discovered. She already felt as if
she had a ball & chain around her foot while being in
water over her head, and the diabetes just added to it.
Sort of a "give-up, what's the point," attitude.
She knows what to do, but she just doesn't care.
Before you can get her to do the right things,
you need to help her to care about herself.
Giving her ultimatums, or paying a lot of money for
medical treatment and then throwing it in her face,
is probably not going to improve the situation.
You've got the material resources with the ability for
the good life, but it is not enough.

I would suggest that as you obviously care about her,
you tell her so, and then prove it to her.
In spite of the fact that she is a gross diabetic,
who refuses to diet, weighs 251 pounds, and is as
round as a ball, try making love with her ! That will
give her something else to do besides eating food, and
will give her the incentive to take care of herself.
You'll probably like it too. Just make sure that you
are not the only one being satisfied. And, not just once
per week. Let her know, in such a direct manner, that
even though she is overweight, you still care about her.
Keep her busy.

I bet you will see an improvement in her attitude.
How a person feels about themselves, is related to the
way in which they take care of themselves.

> In checking out my computer I see she has visited here
> a couple of times so she may have some interest in improving herself.

> She sees her doctors at least three times a month.
> Endocrinologist, Internal Medicine and Allergist.
> They all have tried to tell her that she will die a horrible
> lingering death if she doesn't get control.

Well, telling that to her hasn't worked. If anything,
it made her decide to give up.
But, she does want to do the right thing. That is evidenced
by her desire to look for news groups/forums, and
seeing her endo every month.
However, the incentive is not going to come from her endo,
or a CDE. It is going to come from you.

> I have purchased her a Medtronics pump and all the supporting
> necessities. I have paid for a CDE to instruct her not once
> but at least four times on diet and use of this pump.

> She used it a few weeks and then took it off because she
> didn't like the way it felt. It did improve her Hemoglobin A1C
> to 7.9 down from a previous 11.7. But she didn't like it.

I hope this discussion does not get off track on
how to use a pump. You already know that she is capable of
taking good care of herself with the pump. There are many
tips and tricks for making it work. Perhaps she had problems
with her fat, or with sweating, combined with the new
experience of feeling better. If she has gone along with
higher blood sugars for a long period of time, there will
be an adjustment period as she gets used to having a BG that
approaches normal. She may even feel low when it is actually
around 100 to 120.
If there are problems with the equipment, there should be
solutions. There are a variety of accessories available for
pump use. I would suggest she ask questions on some of the
forums, and get herself back on the pump.

> Now she is back on Insulin
> (Novolog 35units 3 times a day with meals)
> (Lantus 80units at 11pm).
> This is what she injects according to her log.
> She is also supposed to adhere to an 1800 calorie diet,
> personally I think it must be around 8000.

She is taking a lot of insulin because she basically weighs
twice what she should be. The pump would be better for her,
especially if she is eating more than she should.
When she eats something extra, she can set the pump to
deliver some extra insulin---a bolus amount. That won't
help her to lose weight, but it will keep the BG at a
normal level.

As far as the 1800 calorie diet, it is not what she is
used to eating. She feels starved. She didn't gain the
weight overnight and she is not going to lose it in a
short period of time. This is a long-term goal.
She will feel better about herself as she starts to lose
weight, but initially, she may need to adjust to a diet
that fills her up while maintaining a good BG.

While she is on the shots, you should learn to give them
to her, if you are not.
Sounds like she has a lot of room on her arms, but
probably can't reach them easily, and can't bring herself to
admit it to you. Your helping may also add to some of that closeness idea.

> I really am not around a lot for dinner so she has that
> on her own so she can push anything she wants in her mouth
> even with the prepared and delivered meals. Who knows.
> I have seen her eat a whole baguette slathered in butter
> at one sitting^^^^

Maybe she can change her meal time to when you are around.

> She has seen a Psychiatrist for over two years and she deals
> with a number of people who have Diabetes and other chronic
> diseases. Evidently this wife doesn't chose to care for herself.

Then evidently, you need to find out what you can do to change
that situation.

As she is seeing a Psychiatrist, rather that a Psychologist,
she may be on the standard cure-all for depression---the happy pill.
She may need someone who will spend more time with talking,
and less time with medication.
Some of those medications can also cause a decrease in
sexual interest.
After two-years, maybe a slightly different approach with
an emphasis on counseling might help.
Ask her endo what he thinks about that?


> She is a great cook and we have wonderful meals.
> We entertain a lot and everyone always wants to attend
> our dinners and parties.

Then she is not always sitting home alone with a bag or
plate of snack food. There is a social life, and you
have the financial means to support it. However, she
is doing the one thing she is good at---making food !
How about a bowling party, or an outdoor cookout at
a park along with a nature hike?

Maybe she should join an exercise class for overweight
women. Good for her diabetes, and good for the social comradery.

> I have gone so far to hire people to deliver proper meals
> seven days a week and they are calibrated to her diet as
> prescribed by her dietitian.
> She eats them and then I find cakes, cookies, ice cream
> in the fridge.

It is difficult to find fulfilling snacks that are low-carb,
but not impossible. As she is a good cook, tell her to
experiment with diet recipes for cakes, cookies, and pies.
She has to be prepared for a few failures, and any
concoctions will not be in the free-food-item category.
If she has some good results, she can share them
with the newsgroup/forums.

Filling up on diet-pop, or ice-tea in the summer,
is one way to fill up without calories.

> I have just about given up.
> I don't want to live any longer with this very obese and
> loathsome creature who refuses to care for herself
> no matter what is done for her.

> It has cost me thousands of dollars to try and get her
> on the road but I have reached the end of mine.
> I have given her until the end of this month to get it together
or she goes.
> ****Any suggestions*****
> Max

Yeah, no ultimatums. Try the other idea I suggested.
It is obvious that you actually care. But, you may be
making her feel bad by throwing the money issue in her face,
as well as her lack of success, although the lowered A1c
while on the pump was notable. She needs to see what she
can do to get back on the pump. Remember, she didn't gain
the weight instantly. It will be a while before she loses it.
But she can succeed, and will not only feel better
physically, but emotionally as well. And, her diabetes may
be easier to manage.
----------------------

In addition to this newsgroup, there is another forum that
is fairly new. As a result of that, the people running it
will be able to give her a lot of time if she needs some
encouragement. The female administrator knows all about
pumps, and may be able to answer any questions for your wife.
She has also had some experience with depression and diabetes.
If you or your wife want to give it a try, it can be found at:
---> http://www.DiabetesTalkFest.com/

Max Hiligman > wrote:
> **********Sorry this is lengthy**********
> What do you do with a wife who is a gross diabetic. She refuses to
> diet and weighs 251 pounds is 5'6" tall and as round as a ball. She is
> refuses to diet, exercise or move off her damn chair or couch.

Go coffin shopping...get a good plot and headstone. Could try lighting a
match under her...hide the food...place the fridge outside so she has to
make some effort to get up.

"We don't see things as they are.
We see them as we are."

Anais Nin



Evelyn Ruut wrote:

> "Smicker" > wrote in message
> om...
>
>>"surprise lady" > wrote in message
>
> >...
>
>>>"Smicker" > wrote in message
e.com...
>>>
>>>>On 12 Jun 2004 00:47:09 GMT, (D0RAJARR) wrote:
>>>
>>>*snipped for the sake of hygiene
>>>
>>>>My old boss in London would never hire a fat person. He said that they
>>>>couldn't rely on themselves, they had no order or discipline in their
>>>>lives and he sure as hell wasn't going to bring someone like that into
>>>>the firm just so they could stuff our lives up too. I agree with him.
>>>>The few places that I have worked where there were really obese
>>>>employees, they never did their work properly, they were always late
>>>>with everything and they blamed everyone around them for everything
>>>>that went wrong, even when it could have been no one but themselves
>>>>that caused it.
>>>>
>>>>Fat usually equates with slack and lazy. There are very few
>>>>exceptions.
>>>>
>>>>smicker
>>>
>>>Ahhhh, yes, the "I hate fat people" approach.
>>
>>No, it is the "I have abolutely no respect or time for lazy and
>>indulgent people".
>>
>> Just for the sake of
>>
>>>argument, let's substitute the words "blacks" or "women" or "jews" or
>
> "gays"
>
>>>or "southerners".
>>
>>Why? I have nothing against blacks, women, jews, gays, or southerners.
>>Unless they are fat lazy slobs.
>>
>> Bigotry is bigotry is bigotry.
>>
>>Bigotry is unreasonable prejudice. Mine is well reasoned.
>>
>> Just remember, a fat
>>
>>>person can always lose weight, but you will forever remain stupid.
>>
>>First I would have to become stupid in order to remain that way, and
>>that isn't likely to happen, unless perhaps by osmosis from some of
>>the slow witted dupes on these newsgroups. Do you believe in osmosis?
>>
>>Do you have anything intelligent to say? Something that isn't
>>childish, something that might actually be construed as reasoned
>>argument?
>>
>>No?
>>
>>Much as I expected.
>>
>>smicker
>
>
>
> Smicker too bad you can't see yourself as others see you.
> Prejudice is always ultimately unproductive, among other things.
>

"Smicker" > wrote in message
om...

> > Ahhhh, yes, the "I hate fat people" approach.
>
> No, it is the "I have abolutely no respect or time for lazy and
> indulgent people".
>
> Just for the sake of
> > argument, let's substitute the words "blacks" or "women" or "jews" or
"gays"
> > or "southerners".
>
> Why? I have nothing against blacks, women, jews, gays, or southerners.
> Unless they are fat lazy slobs.
>
> Bigotry is bigotry is bigotry.
>
> Bigotry is unreasonable prejudice. Mine is well reasoned.
>
> Just remember, a fat
> > person can always lose weight, but you will forever remain stupid.
>
> First I would have to become stupid in order to remain that way, and
> that isn't likely to happen, unless perhaps by osmosis from some of
> the slow witted dupes on these newsgroups. Do you believe in osmosis?
>
> Do you have anything intelligent to say? Something that isn't
> childish, something that might actually be construed as reasoned
> argument?
>
> No?
>
> Much as I expected.
>
> smicker
________________________________
Your comment proves my point. You are just plain stupid. And now, you
shall enter my kill file.

I really like your advice
Patricia
"*~*WiseWords - WiseWords4Diabetics"
> wrote in message
om...
> Max Hiligman > wrote in message
> >...
>
>> **********Sorry this is lengthy**********
>> What do you do with a wife who is a gross diabetic.
>> She refuses to diet and weighs 251 pounds is 5'6" tall and
>> as round as a ball.
>
>> She is refuses to diet, exercise or move off her damn chair
>> or couch.
>
> You have gotten a lot of advice about how & why she should
> take care of herself, but both you and her already knew that.
> I am going to give you a different suggestion which I think
> will get to the root of the problem.
> Diabetes is such an all-encompassing condition that many
> factors which are not related directly to the medical part
> of treatment, do, in fact, affect us.
> I believe that this is an issue, in the case of your wife.
>
> She doesn't feel good about herself, and probably didn't
> before the diabetes was discovered. She already felt as if
> she had a ball & chain around her foot while being in
> water over her head, and the diabetes just added to it.
> Sort of a "give-up, what's the point," attitude.
> She knows what to do, but she just doesn't care.
> Before you can get her to do the right things,
> you need to help her to care about herself.
> Giving her ultimatums, or paying a lot of money for
> medical treatment and then throwing it in her face,
> is probably not going to improve the situation.
> You've got the material resources with the ability for
> the good life, but it is not enough.
>
> I would suggest that as you obviously care about her,
> you tell her so, and then prove it to her.
> In spite of the fact that she is a gross diabetic,
> who refuses to diet, weighs 251 pounds, and is as
> round as a ball, try making love with her ! That will
> give her something else to do besides eating food, and
> will give her the incentive to take care of herself.
> You'll probably like it too. Just make sure that you
> are not the only one being satisfied. And, not just once
> per week. Let her know, in such a direct manner, that
> even though she is overweight, you still care about her.
> Keep her busy.
>
> I bet you will see an improvement in her attitude.
> How a person feels about themselves, is related to the
> way in which they take care of themselves.
>
>> In checking out my computer I see she has visited here
>> a couple of times so she may have some interest in improving herself.
>
>> She sees her doctors at least three times a month.
>> Endocrinologist, Internal Medicine and Allergist.
>> They all have tried to tell her that she will die a horrible
>> lingering death if she doesn't get control.
>
> Well, telling that to her hasn't worked. If anything,
> it made her decide to give up.
> But, she does want to do the right thing. That is evidenced
> by her desire to look for news groups/forums, and
> seeing her endo every month.
> However, the incentive is not going to come from her endo,
> or a CDE. It is going to come from you.
>
>> I have purchased her a Medtronics pump and all the supporting
>> necessities. I have paid for a CDE to instruct her not once
>> but at least four times on diet and use of this pump.
>
>> She used it a few weeks and then took it off because she
>> didn't like the way it felt. It did improve her Hemoglobin A1C
>> to 7.9 down from a previous 11.7. But she didn't like it.
>
> I hope this discussion does not get off track on
> how to use a pump. You already know that she is capable of
> taking good care of herself with the pump. There are many
> tips and tricks for making it work. Perhaps she had problems
> with her fat, or with sweating, combined with the new
> experience of feeling better. If she has gone along with
> higher blood sugars for a long period of time, there will
> be an adjustment period as she gets used to having a BG that
> approaches normal. She may even feel low when it is actually
> around 100 to 120.
> If there are problems with the equipment, there should be
> solutions. There are a variety of accessories available for
> pump use. I would suggest she ask questions on some of the
> forums, and get herself back on the pump.
>
>> Now she is back on Insulin
>> (Novolog 35units 3 times a day with meals)
>> (Lantus 80units at 11pm).
>> This is what she injects according to her log.
>> She is also supposed to adhere to an 1800 calorie diet,
>> personally I think it must be around 8000.
>
> She is taking a lot of insulin because she basically weighs
> twice what she should be. The pump would be better for her,
> especially if she is eating more than she should.
> When she eats something extra, she can set the pump to
> deliver some extra insulin---a bolus amount. That won't
> help her to lose weight, but it will keep the BG at a
> normal level.
>
> As far as the 1800 calorie diet, it is not what she is
> used to eating. She feels starved. She didn't gain the
> weight overnight and she is not going to lose it in a
> short period of time. This is a long-term goal.
> She will feel better about herself as she starts to lose
> weight, but initially, she may need to adjust to a diet
> that fills her up while maintaining a good BG.
>
> While she is on the shots, you should learn to give them
> to her, if you are not.
> Sounds like she has a lot of room on her arms, but
> probably can't reach them easily, and can't bring herself to
> admit it to you. Your helping may also add to some of that closeness idea.
>
>> I really am not around a lot for dinner so she has that
>> on her own so she can push anything she wants in her mouth
>> even with the prepared and delivered meals. Who knows.
>> I have seen her eat a whole baguette slathered in butter
>> at one sitting^^^^
>
> Maybe she can change her meal time to when you are around.
>
>> She has seen a Psychiatrist for over two years and she deals
>> with a number of people who have Diabetes and other chronic
>> diseases. Evidently this wife doesn't chose to care for herself.
>
> Then evidently, you need to find out what you can do to change
> that situation.
>
> As she is seeing a Psychiatrist, rather that a Psychologist,
> she may be on the standard cure-all for depression---the happy pill.
> She may need someone who will spend more time with talking,
> and less time with medication.
> Some of those medications can also cause a decrease in
> sexual interest.
> After two-years, maybe a slightly different approach with
> an emphasis on counseling might help.
> Ask her endo what he thinks about that?
>
>
>> She is a great cook and we have wonderful meals.
>> We entertain a lot and everyone always wants to attend
>> our dinners and parties.
>
> Then she is not always sitting home alone with a bag or
> plate of snack food. There is a social life, and you
> have the financial means to support it. However, she
> is doing the one thing she is good at---making food !
> How about a bowling party, or an outdoor cookout at
> a park along with a nature hike?
>
> Maybe she should join an exercise class for overweight
> women. Good for her diabetes, and good for the social comradery.
>
>> I have gone so far to hire people to deliver proper meals
>> seven days a week and they are calibrated to her diet as
>> prescribed by her dietitian.
>> She eats them and then I find cakes, cookies, ice cream
>> in the fridge.
>
> It is difficult to find fulfilling snacks that are low-carb,
> but not impossible. As she is a good cook, tell her to
> experiment with diet recipes for cakes, cookies, and pies.
> She has to be prepared for a few failures, and any
> concoctions will not be in the free-food-item category.
> If she has some good results, she can share them
> with the newsgroup/forums.
>
> Filling up on diet-pop, or ice-tea in the summer,
> is one way to fill up without calories.
>
>> I have just about given up.
>> I don't want to live any longer with this very obese and
>> loathsome creature who refuses to care for herself
>> no matter what is done for her.
>
>> It has cost me thousands of dollars to try and get her
>> on the road but I have reached the end of mine.
>> I have given her until the end of this month to get it together
> or she goes.
>> ****Any suggestions*****
>> Max
>
> Yeah, no ultimatums. Try the other idea I suggested.
> It is obvious that you actually care. But, you may be
> making her feel bad by throwing the money issue in her face,
> as well as her lack of success, although the lowered A1c
> while on the pump was notable. She needs to see what she
> can do to get back on the pump. Remember, she didn't gain
> the weight instantly. It will be a while before she loses it.
> But she can succeed, and will not only feel better
> physically, but emotionally as well. And, her diabetes may
> be easier to manage.
> ----------------------
>
> In addition to this newsgroup, there is another forum that
> is fairly new. As a result of that, the people running it
> will be able to give her a lot of time if she needs some
> encouragement. The female administrator knows all about
> pumps, and may be able to answer any questions for your wife.
> She has also had some experience with depression and diabetes.
> If you or your wife want to give it a try, it can be found at:
> ---> http://www.DiabetesTalkFest.com/

On Fri, 11 Jun 2004 12:36:24 -0700, Max Hiligman >
wrote:

> What do you do with a wife who is a gross diabetic. She refuses to
>diet and weighs 251 pounds is 5'6" tall and as round as a ball. She is
> refuses to diet, exercise or move off her damn chair or couch.
> In checking out my computer I see she has visited here a couple of
>times so she may have some interest in improving herself.
> She sees her doctors at least three times a month. Endocrinologist,
>Internal Medicine and Allergist. They all have tried to tell her that
>she will die a horrible lingering death if she doesn't get control.

Could you post the name she bosted under? I suspect I know who
she iws. That person came here asking for advice, then when getting
some she didn't like became abusive telling us that the advice we
gave was worthless, because it was free and she paid her doctors
for good advice which she would listen to. I suspect she wasn't
listening to her doctors. Instead she was hearing what she wanted to
hear. It seemed like there was no way anyone would change her mind.

And the thing is that she felt that she should do a little, and that
was good enough.

Diabetes is sort of the opposite of alchoholism. In alcholism a person
has to stop doing something for her health. In diabetes a person has
to start doing something for her health. In either case if she doesn't
waqnt to change there is little to do.

There is one drastic thing that you might want to try. By a couple
issues of something like Penthouse. Start looking at them in front
of her. When she asks why you are doing that, reply "The way
you are taking care of yourself, I figure I will soon need to find
a replacement. "

Might knock some sense into her head.

A lot of "Weight Challenged" people I know are either on the Atkins Diet
(works for some) or have stomach bypass surgery. Talk to your medical
professional about those options.

"Tiger Lily" > wrote in message
...
> it's sad, Max, but it looks like you have taken the appropriate
"ultimatum"
> that you can live with
>
> control of this disease is the only way to prevent the complications that
> will ultimately follow
>
> perhaps some counselling for you wife to find out why she's in denial
> still??
>
> take care,
> kate
> --
> Join us in the Diabetic-Talk Chatroom on UnderNet
> /server irc.undernet.org --- /join #Diabetic-Talk
> More info: http://www.diabetic-talk.org/
>
> "Max Hiligman" > wrote in message
> ...
> > **********Sorry this is lengthy**********
> > What do you do with a wife who is a gross diabetic. She refuses to
> > diet and weighs 251 pounds is 5'6" tall and as round as a ball. She is
> > refuses to diet, exercise or move off her damn chair or couch.
> > In checking out my computer I see she has visited here a couple of
> > times so she may have some interest in improving herself.
> > She sees her doctors at least three times a month. Endocrinologist,
> > Internal Medicine and Allergist. They all have tried to tell her that
> > she will die a horrible lingering death if she doesn't get control.
> > I have purchased her a Medtronics pump and all the supporting
> > necessities. I have paid for a CDE to instruct her not once but at
> > least four times on diet and use of this pump.
> > She used it a few weeks and then took it off because she didn't like
> > the way it felt. It did improve her Hemoglobin 1C to 7.9 down from a
> > previous 11.7. But she didn't like it.
> > Now she is back on Insulin (Novolog 35units 3 times a day with meals)
> > (Langus 80units at 11pm) sorry I am not certain if that is units, cc's
> > or mg. This is what she injects according to her log. She is also
> > supposed to adhere to an 1800 calorie diet, personally I think it must
> > be around 8000. I really am not around a lot for dinner so she has that
> > on her own so she can push anything she wants in her mouth even with the
> > prepared and delivered meals. Who knows. I have seen her eat a whole
> > baguette slathered in butter at one sitting^^^^
> > She has seen a Psychiatrist for over two years and she deals with a
> > number of people who have Diabetes and other chronic diseases.
> > Evidently this wife doesn't chose to care for herself.
> > She is a great cook and we have wonderful meals. We entertain a lot
> > and everyone always wants to attend our dinners and parties.
> > I have gone so far to hire people to deliver proper meals seven days
> > a week and they are calibrated to her diet as prescribed by her
dietitian.
> > She eats them and then I find cakes, cookies, ice cream in the fridge.
> > I have just about given up. I don't want to live any longer with
> > this very obese and loathsome creature who refuses to care for herself
> > no matter what is done for her.
> > It has cost me thousands of dollars to try and get her on the road
> > but I have reached the end of mine.
> > I have given her until the end of this month to get it together or
> > she goes.
> > ****Any suggestions*****
> > Max
> >
> >
> >
>
>

On Sat, 7 Aug 2004 10:27:47 -0800, "arcticat" > wrote:

>A lot of "Weight Challenged" people I know are either on the Atkins Diet
>(works for some) or have stomach bypass surgery. Talk to your medical
>professional about those options.

My father in law died a couple of days after his bypass surgery due to
complications of the surgery.

--
Siobhan Perricone
Humans wrote the bible,
God wrote the rocks
-- Word of God by Kathy Mar

On Sat, 7 Aug 2004 10:27:47 -0800, "arcticat" > wrote:

>A lot of "Weight Challenged" people I know are either on the Atkins Diet
>(works for some) or have stomach bypass surgery. Talk to your medical
>professional about those options.

My father in law died a couple of days after his bypass surgery due to
complications of the surgery.

--
Siobhan Perricone
Humans wrote the bible,
God wrote the rocks
-- Word of God by Kathy Mar

On Sat, 7 Aug 2004 10:27:47 -0800, "arcticat" > wrote:

>A lot of "Weight Challenged" people I know are either on the Atkins Diet
>(works for some) or have stomach bypass surgery. Talk to your medical
>professional about those options.

My father in law died a couple of days after his bypass surgery due to
complications of the surgery.

--
Siobhan Perricone
Humans wrote the bible,
God wrote the rocks
-- Word of God by Kathy Mar