The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
it, "authentic BBQ". The wife, who is as pretty as she is sweet
(Sweeter than the crap they tried to pass off as BBQ sauce!), had
gotten me a gift certificate for Christmas to the joint, knowing how
much I'd enjoy real BBQ. OK- enough chit-chat- They had several
specials tonight- 2 of which were a full rack of ribs (12 bones) w/ no
sides for $10, and a skewer of 5 shrimp for $1.50. I ordered the full
rack dry, w/ sauce on the side- I asked for the least sweet sauce they
had, and a skewer of shrimp. My wife got the ribs (6 bones) and
brisket combo.

Geez- where do I start?! My ribs were about as bland as "par-boiled"
mush w/ no butter or syrup- I'm pretty sure their journey to the table
began in boiling water, and then on to an oven, until they were
"falling off the bone" tender, at which point they normally would have
been slathered with sickeningly sweet sauce, and grilled for a few
minutes. I think they would have actually been better with the sweet
sauce- the bones probably had more, and better flavor! On to the
wife's brisket- it was very odd looking, and tasted like "medicine"-
which I contribute to the probable use of liquid smoke. My wife
couldn't stand it, and after tasting it, I couldn't blame her. We said
something to our server, and she replaced the brisket with what they
called "pulled pork". Geez- it just doesn't get any better. While the
pulled pork didn't have a bad taste, it lacked any bold and smoke
flavor whatsoever! It tasted like it had been cooked in an oven
instead of a pit. It reminded me of mom's Sunday dinners years ago,
when she'd make roast pork- except her dinners were much better. Next-
the skewer of shrimp. I chose the spicy garlic sauce, which was
actually not bad. However, the shrimp were grilled for way too long.
They were chewy and rubbery! Damn- can this place get anything right?!
The appetizer we ordered was their nachos w/ roast pork- uh, I mean
pulled pork (Yea- right). The "cheese" on it was of the "processed"
variety, similar to the taste of a rough night of partying coming back
up- not that I'd know anything about that, of course!

When I said something to our server about the food tasting nothing
like real BBQ, she admitted that they DID NOT EVEN HAVE A PIT, and
that everything was "cooked" in the oven, and then grilled for the
last few minutes, with the exception of their brisket, which never
even made it to the grill! Our server said something to the manager,
who took a whopping $3.47 off of our $50.00 bill, due to our
"dissatisfaction"! Gee, thanks!

Oh well, live and learn, is the best way I can think to look at this.
Of course, you know that this forum is to blame for my rant, don't
you?! Before stumbling across alt.food.barbecue, I probably would have
accepted this vile offering as "real BBQ", and may have even liked it-
Lord, I hope not! So- thanks for listening to my rant, and even more
so, thanks for enlightening me enough to know enough to have this rant
in the first place!

JimnGin

"JimnGin" > wrote:
> [ . . . ]
> Oh well, live and learn, is the best way I can think to look at this.
> Of course, you know that this forum is to blame for my rant, don't
> you?! Before stumbling across alt.food.barbecue, I probably would have
> accepted this vile offering as "real BBQ", and may have even liked it-
> Lord, I hope not! So- thanks for listening to my rant, and even more
> so, thanks for enlightening me enough to know enough to have this rant
> in the first place!

Once ya start doin' yer own Q, there's none better!

--
Nick. Support severely wounded and disabled Veterans and their families!

Thank a Veteran and Support Our Troops. You are not forgotten. Thanks ! ! !
~Semper Fi~

"JimnGin" > wrote in message
oups.com...
> The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
> Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
> it, "authentic BBQ". The wife, who is as pretty as she is sweet
> (Sweeter than the crap they tried to pass off as BBQ sauce!), had
> gotten me a gift certificate for Christmas to the joint, knowing how
> much I'd enjoy real BBQ. OK- enough chit-chat- They had several
> specials tonight- 2 of which were a full rack of ribs (12 bones) w/ no
> sides for $10, and a skewer of 5 shrimp for $1.50. I ordered the full
> rack dry, w/ sauce on the side- I asked for the least sweet sauce they
> had, and a skewer of shrimp. My wife got the ribs (6 bones) and
> brisket combo.
>
> Geez- where do I start?! My ribs were about as bland as "par-boiled"
> mush w/ no butter or syrup- I'm pretty sure their journey to the table
> began in boiling water, and then on to an oven, until they were
> "falling off the bone" tender, at which point they normally would have
> been slathered with sickeningly sweet sauce, and grilled for a few
> minutes. I think they would have actually been better with the sweet
> sauce- the bones probably had more, and better flavor! On to the
> wife's brisket- it was very odd looking, and tasted like "medicine"-
> which I contribute to the probable use of liquid smoke. My wife
> couldn't stand it, and after tasting it, I couldn't blame her. We said
> something to our server, and she replaced the brisket with what they
> called "pulled pork". Geez- it just doesn't get any better. While the
> pulled pork didn't have a bad taste, it lacked any bold and smoke
> flavor whatsoever! It tasted like it had been cooked in an oven
> instead of a pit. It reminded me of mom's Sunday dinners years ago,
> when she'd make roast pork- except her dinners were much better. Next-
> the skewer of shrimp. I chose the spicy garlic sauce, which was
> actually not bad. However, the shrimp were grilled for way too long.
> They were chewy and rubbery! Damn- can this place get anything right?!
> The appetizer we ordered was their nachos w/ roast pork- uh, I mean
> pulled pork (Yea- right). The "cheese" on it was of the "processed"
> variety, similar to the taste of a rough night of partying coming back
> up- not that I'd know anything about that, of course!
>
> When I said something to our server about the food tasting nothing
> like real BBQ, she admitted that they DID NOT EVEN HAVE A PIT, and
> that everything was "cooked" in the oven, and then grilled for the
> last few minutes, with the exception of their brisket, which never
> even made it to the grill! Our server said something to the manager,
> who took a whopping $3.47 off of our $50.00 bill, due to our
> "dissatisfaction"! Gee, thanks!
>
> Oh well, live and learn, is the best way I can think to look at this.
> Of course, you know that this forum is to blame for my rant, don't
> you?! Before stumbling across alt.food.barbecue, I probably would have
> accepted this vile offering as "real BBQ", and may have even liked it-
> Lord, I hope not! So- thanks for listening to my rant, and even more
> so, thanks for enlightening me enough to know enough to have this rant
> in the first place!
>
> JimnGin
>

BBQ is a noun, not a verb....if they don't understand that, just back away
from the table and take your cash elsewhere!

On 13 Mar 2007 20:03:08 -0700, "JimnGin" > wrote:

>The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
>Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
>it, "authentic BBQ". The wife, who is as pretty as she is sweet
>(Sweeter than the crap they tried to pass off as BBQ sauce!), had
>gotten me a gift certificate for Christmas to the joint, knowing how
>much I'd enjoy real BBQ. OK- enough chit-chat- They had several
>specials tonight- 2 of which were a full rack of ribs (12 bones) w/ no
>sides for $10, and a skewer of 5 shrimp for $1.50. I ordered the full
>rack dry, w/ sauce on the side- I asked for the least sweet sauce they
>had, and a skewer of shrimp. My wife got the ribs (6 bones) and
>brisket combo.
>
>Geez- where do I start?! My ribs were about as bland as "par-boiled"
>mush w/ no butter or syrup- I'm pretty sure their journey to the table
>began in boiling water, and then on to an oven, until they were
>"falling off the bone" tender, at which point they normally would have
>been slathered with sickeningly sweet sauce, and grilled for a few
>minutes. I think they would have actually been better with the sweet
>sauce- the bones probably had more, and better flavor! On to the
>wife's brisket- it was very odd looking, and tasted like "medicine"-
>which I contribute to the probable use of liquid smoke. My wife
>couldn't stand it, and after tasting it, I couldn't blame her. We said
>something to our server, and she replaced the brisket with what they
>called "pulled pork". Geez- it just doesn't get any better. While the
>pulled pork didn't have a bad taste, it lacked any bold and smoke
>flavor whatsoever! It tasted like it had been cooked in an oven
>instead of a pit. It reminded me of mom's Sunday dinners years ago,
>when she'd make roast pork- except her dinners were much better. Next-
>the skewer of shrimp. I chose the spicy garlic sauce, which was
>actually not bad. However, the shrimp were grilled for way too long.
>They were chewy and rubbery! Damn- can this place get anything right?!
>The appetizer we ordered was their nachos w/ roast pork- uh, I mean
>pulled pork (Yea- right). The "cheese" on it was of the "processed"
>variety, similar to the taste of a rough night of partying coming back
>up- not that I'd know anything about that, of course!
>
>When I said something to our server about the food tasting nothing
>like real BBQ, she admitted that they DID NOT EVEN HAVE A PIT, and
>that everything was "cooked" in the oven, and then grilled for the
>last few minutes, with the exception of their brisket, which never
>even made it to the grill! Our server said something to the manager,
>who took a whopping $3.47 off of our $50.00 bill, due to our
>"dissatisfaction"! Gee, thanks!
>
>Oh well, live and learn, is the best way I can think to look at this.
>Of course, you know that this forum is to blame for my rant, don't
>you?! Before stumbling across alt.food.barbecue, I probably would have
>accepted this vile offering as "real BBQ", and may have even liked it-
>Lord, I hope not! So- thanks for listening to my rant, and even more
>so, thanks for enlightening me enough to know enough to have this rant
>in the first place!
>
>JimnGin
Yeah. These days they bake it in an oven and depend on the customer to
load it up with sauce for taste. I don't go in unless there's a smoker
outside and a stack of wood. I got fooled once. I went into a place
that had a smoker and the meat was bland. I asked the college student
what kind of wood they used and he said they hadn't used the smoker
for years, that it was baked in a special oven with sawdust for smoke.
I asked what kind of sawdust they used and he said they had been out
for a couple of weeks but were expecting another shipment any day.
They don't even pretend to barbecue any more.

On 2007-03-14, JimnGin > wrote:
> The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
> Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
> it, "authentic BBQ". The wife, who is as pretty as she is sweet
> (Sweeter than the crap they tried to pass off as BBQ sauce!), had
> gotten me a gift certificate for Christmas to the joint, knowing how
> much I'd enjoy real BBQ. OK- enough chit-chat- They had several
> specials tonight- 2 of which were a full rack of ribs (12 bones) w/ no
> sides for $10, and a skewer of 5 shrimp for $1.50. I ordered the full
> rack dry, w/ sauce on the side- I asked for the least sweet sauce they
> had, and a skewer of shrimp. My wife got the ribs (6 bones) and
> brisket combo.

I'm waiting for a local BBQ place to open up across the street from my
office -- I want to see if they're "real" or fake.. Don't know yet as the
contractors are still doing their work -- perhaps I'll take a peek in the
window to see if I can glean anything from the work being done.. In the
meantime, I was at my local Smart-N-Final last night getting a brisket
flat (aka the corned beef variety -- a nice 10lb jobbie) to turn into
Pastrami per a website I found the other day and noticed that they had
these pale looking pieces of vacuum packed meat in the same area as the
brisket.. I picked one up and looked at it and it was pre-cooked corned
beef brisket -- it was likely chucked in a pressure cooker or oven as
it looked gray in color and not anything that looked edible.. Eww..
The funny part was that they wanted almost as much for it as the raw
corned beef brisket (10lb) dude I got for $21 and the precooked one was
perhaps 1/2 the size.. Yuck..

Steve Wertz wrote:
> On 13 Mar 2007 20:03:08 -0700, JimnGin wrote:
>
>> The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
>> Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
>> it, "authentic BBQ".
>
> They advertise "Open Flame BBQ", which should send up red flags
> right there.
>
> Don't forget to add your comments to their guestbook:
> http://www.hogheaven-bbq.com/guestbook/
>
> -sw

At least the waitresses are hot. Looks like the "hog" heaven is a play
on bikers not BBQ. Looks like one of those themed Hawaiian burger joints
that spend much more on the decor than the food.

Steve Wertz wrote:
> On 13 Mar 2007 20:03:08 -0700, JimnGin wrote:
>
>
>>The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
>>Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
>>it, "authentic BBQ".
>
>
> They advertise "Open Flame BBQ", which should send up red flags
> right there.
>
> Don't forget to add your comments to their guestbook:
> http://www.hogheaven-bbq.com/guestbook/
>
> -sw
From their menu, it looks like they are selling barbecue sauce, and
delivery systems.

"Steve Wertz" > wrote in message
...
> On 13 Mar 2007 20:03:08 -0700, JimnGin wrote:
>
>> The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
>> Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
>> it, "authentic BBQ".
>
> They advertise "Open Flame BBQ", which should send up red flags
> right there.
>
> Don't forget to add your comments to their guestbook:
> http://www.hogheaven-bbq.com/guestbook/
>
> -sw

When I go for BBQ, and it's not that often, I drive around the joint a
couple of times. I want to see what they're cooking with.
And I never go to the yuppie 'Real BBQ' places, I know they're not going to
have a clue.

On 14 Mar 2007 03:16:54 GMT, Nick Cramer >
wrote:

>"JimnGin" > wrote:
>> [ . . . ]
>> Oh well, live and learn, is the best way I can think to look at this.
>> Of course, you know that this forum is to blame for my rant, don't
>> you?! Before stumbling across alt.food.barbecue, I probably would have
>> accepted this vile offering as "real BBQ", and may have even liked it-
>> Lord, I hope not! So- thanks for listening to my rant, and even more
>> so, thanks for enlightening me enough to know enough to have this rant
>> in the first place!
>
>Once ya start doin' yer own Q, there's none better!

No Kidding!. The Madam really gets snarly if we go a couple of days
w/o Que. This usually happens if there's rain[ rarely] - mostly too
much wind for the Operator's tolerance [The Kamado doesn't get
bothered], in Winter. That's the price you pay for having a great
view of the Rockies off the rear of your house.

Harry

On Mar 14, 1:01 pm, Steve Wertz > wrote:
> On 13 Mar 2007 20:03:08 -0700, JimnGin wrote:
>
> > The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
> > Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
> > it, "authentic BBQ".
>
> They advertise "Open Flame BBQ", which should send up red flags
> right there.
>
> Don't forget to add your comments to their guestbook:http://www.hogheaven-bbq.com/guestbook/
>
> -sw

On Mar 14, 1:01 pm, Steve Wertz > wrote:
> On 13 Mar 2007 20:03:08 -0700, JimnGin wrote:
>

> They advertise "Open Flame BBQ", which should send up red flags
> right there.
>
> Don't forget to add your comments to their guestbook:http://www.hogheaven-bbq.com/guestbook/
>
> -sw

Yea- too bad I missed that! I e-mailed the company, and the owner e-
mailed me back. The first sentence was an apology, and the majority of
the remainder of the e-mail was a defense to his sub-par food. He
said: "Everyone has an opinion of what "real" BBQ should taste like.
We do not try to impress anyone that ours is the real BBQ. We take
pride in our BBQ sauce, which we ship all over the US, and we do not
claim that we smoke our meats and cook over a wood fire. We do cook
our meats in ovens at a low temperature and finish our ribs on an open
flame grille. We are proud of the foods that we produce and we have
never tried to pass off our BBQ as smoked and prepared over a wood
fire." Gee- I sure was mistaken- somehow, from their website, I
assumed that I'd be eating real BBQ. Definitely a lesson learned.
However, there is another BBQ joint nearby, called Old Carolina BBQ,
that does smoke everything over hickory smoke. I've had there pulled
pork, and I can attest that it's the real thing! If I'm in the mood
for pulled pork, and don't want to make it myself, that is where I'll
go. They even make a mustard-based sauce, which is what I like on
pulled pork. They don't serve their ribs with sauce, because they say
that they have nothing to hide- sauce is served on the side. Here's
alink to their website: http://www.oldcarolina.com/home.shtml

JimnGin

On 13-Mar-2007, "JimnGin" >
wrote:

> The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ"
> restaurant tonight in
> Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to
> fame" is, as they put
> it, "authentic BBQ".

<snip>

> The appetizer we ordered was their nachos w/
> roast pork- uh, I mean
> pulled pork (Yea- right). The "cheese" on it was
> of the "processed"
> variety, similar to the taste of a rough night
> of partying coming back
> up- not that I'd know anything about that, of
> course!
>

<snip some more>

>
> Oh well, live and learn, is the best way I can
> think to look at this.
> Of course, you know that this forum is to blame
> for my rant, don't
> you?! Before stumbling across alt.food.barbecue,
> I probably would have
> accepted this vile offering as "real BBQ", and
> may have even liked it-
> Lord, I hope not! So- thanks for listening to my
> rant, and even more
> so, thanks for enlightening me enough to know
> enough to have this rant
> in the first place!
>
> JimnGin

Good rant TimnGin. Several of us are prone to that

malady from time to time. I especially liked the
part
about the taste of a rough night of partying
coming
back up. Perhaps you could explain in greater
detail.
I'm sure that no one here has the least idea what
you
are talking about. Is that like when you wake up
and
your hair hurts and your fingernails itch? I know
about
that one.

--
Brick(Youth is wasted on young people)

On Mar 14, 11:21 pm, "Brick" > wrote:
> On 13-Mar-2007, "JimnGin" >
> wrote:
>
> > The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ"
> > restaurant tonight in
> > Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to
> > fame" is, as they put
> > it, "authentic BBQ".
>
> <snip>
>
> > The appetizer we ordered was their nachos w/
> > roast pork- uh, I mean
> > pulled pork (Yea- right). The "cheese" on it was
> > of the "processed"
> > variety, similar to the taste of a rough night
> > of partying coming back
> > up- not that I'd know anything about that, of
> > course!
>
> <snip some more>
>
>
>
>
>
> > Oh well, live and learn, is the best way I can
> > think to look at this.
> > Of course, you know that this forum is to blame
> > for my rant, don't
> > you?! Before stumbling across alt.food.barbecue,
> > I probably would have
> > accepted this vile offering as "real BBQ", and
> > may have even liked it-
> > Lord, I hope not! So- thanks for listening to my
> > rant, and even more
> > so, thanks for enlightening me enough to know
> > enough to have this rant
> > in the first place!
>
> > JimnGin
>
> Good rant TimnGin. Several of us are prone to that
>
> malady from time to time. I especially liked the
> part
> about the taste of a rough night of partying
> coming
> back up. Perhaps you could explain in greater
> detail.
> I'm sure that no one here has the least idea what
> you
> are talking about. Is that like when you wake up
> and
> your hair hurts and your fingernails itch? I know
> about
> that one.
>
> --
> Brick(Youth is wasted on young people)


Without admitting anything, I can say- I feel your pain! (Of course,
that experience, or "wisdom", comes from when the youth you speak of
was being wasted on my young self!)

JimnGin

On 14-Mar-2007, Steve Wertz
> wrote:

> On 14 Mar 2007 17:31:40 GMT, Rick F. wrote:
>
> > The funny part was that they wanted almost as
> > much for it as the raw
> > corned beef brisket (10lb) dude I got for $21
> > and the precooked one was
> > perhaps 1/2 the size.. Yuck..
>
> Brisket shrinks up to 40% when cooked. SO it
> was bascially the
> same price as the raw stuff and was corned and
> cooked to boot.
>
> I was going to make a corned beef brisket this
> week (home cured),
> but I couldn't find any good deals on brisket.
>
> -sw

I saw a new twist in Corned Beef marketing today.
My local Italian store had both corned beef 'tips'

and corned beef 'flats' on display. The flats were
priced about 30% higher then the tips. I believe
I've never seen corned beef tips before. These
were all cryovac'd. Alas, I was shopping for pizza
ingredients, so I bypassed the corned beef and
bought fresh 'in-store made' mozzarella for my
pizza.

--
Brick(Youth is wasted on young people)

On Wed, 14 Mar 2007 16:35:45 -0700, "Michael Boyd" >
wrote:

>
>"Steve Wertz" > wrote in message
...
>> On 13 Mar 2007 20:03:08 -0700, JimnGin wrote:
>>
>>> The wife and I went to local, so-called "BBQ" restaurant tonight in
>>> Canton, Ohio, called Hog Heaven. Their "claim to fame" is, as they put
>>> it, "authentic BBQ".
>>
>> They advertise "Open Flame BBQ", which should send up red flags
>> right there.
>>
>> Don't forget to add your comments to their guestbook:
>> http://www.hogheaven-bbq.com/guestbook/
>>
>> -sw
>
>When I go for BBQ, and it's not that often, I drive around the joint a
>couple of times. I want to see what they're cooking with.
>And I never go to the yuppie 'Real BBQ' places, I know they're not going to
>have a clue.
>
That test wouldn't work in many municipalities because they have bans
and/or restrictions on open pit smoking and BBQuing by commercial
establishments.

So large cookers like those Southern Pride jobbies serve instead.
Their product is not bad if the operator knows what he is doing.

Having said that, Pulled Pork, ribs, & brisket have a short shelf life
after they come out to the serving area. So you need to match the
number/capacity of cookers to the customer traffic.

Sam Snead, years ego at his Homestead VA BBQ joint, [way before the
franchise thing], had 8 pits, behind the place. They were made out of
[2 doubled up end to end each] 45 gal drums so he had a large area
over coals. He'd load them up in the morning and with all that smoke
spreading out advertising throughout the valley by mid morning filled
his place for supper.

He mostly made ribs and he ran until he sold out. Then he closed the
'kitchen' for the night. [you could still stay & drink, eh].

That was probably the best commercial BBQ that I have ever had.

Harry