First-class Bad Butter
On 29 Apr 2007 14:56:42 -0700, Radium > wrote:
>Hi:
>
>Here is how my 1st-class butter is made.
>
>Raw, uncooked, organic, un-homogenized, un-pasteurized cow's milk is
>used. Purely-anaerobic, non-pathogenic bacteria are what indirectly
>turn the milk into butter. Throughout the process, the butter is
>mysteriously protected completely against any degradation or
>abnormality [e.g. rancidity] other than bacterial decay.
>
>No microbes other than purely-anaerobic, non-pathogenic bacteria enter
>the milk/butter or travel anywhere near the milk/butter or their
>containers.
>
>First, any and all minerals, metals, ions, and electrolytes are
>removed from the milk. Then the bacteria enter the milk. These
>bacteria initially feed on all substances in the milk *excluding* the
>following entities naturally present in the milk:
>
>Lipids [including non-greasy lipids]
>Greasy substances [including greasy substances not classified as
>lipids]
>Elastic substances
>Natural emulsifiers
>Creamy substances
>Slimy substances
>
>The bacteria produce odorous compounds - including but not limited to
>-- skatole, indole, acetoin, methyl ketones [such as diacetyl],
>amines, butyric acid, isobutryic acid, caproic acid, propionic acid,
>isovaleric acid, and valeric acid.
>
>After all the bacterial processes are finished, the water content in
>the concoction is decreased to 15% [about the same water as most high-
>quality butter].
>
>This butter smells bad like stinky cheese [including stale Swiss
>cheese that has been left in an anaerobic, warm, humid environment for
>at least 30 years], smelly feet, sweaty shirts, dirty socks, neck-
>sweat, back-sweat, filthy scalp and unwashed hair.
>
>You now have 1st-class butter!!!!
>
>Anyone want to try some of this delicious butter??
>
>Important note on bacteria: All bacteria used in the above process are
>not pathogenic. IOW - much like intestinal bacteria -- they do not
>cause any disease or infection. In addition, none of these bacteria
>use oxygen for any of their biochemical processes. Some of them can
>survive in oxygen, while others can't. However, none of them use
>oxygen. Acetic-acid bacteria are an example of bacteria that are not
>used in the butter-making processes because - while they maybe
>anaerobic - they still require oxygen to produce acetic acid.
>
>
>Regards,
>
>Radium
Sounds like something you'd get at The Fat Duck.
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