Hey, at least you got a meal. I flew back yesterday in 1st class on
Delta (from NYC to ATL) and all I got was a ****ing cookie/cracker and
some mixed nuts.

On Tue, 27 Apr 2004 19:18:03 -0700, Stanley
> wrote:

>Just flew back home on United this sunday and I haven't been able to
>stop shitting for three days! What the hell was in that chicken? I'm
>getting these real sticky messy shits that come in waves, everytime I
>think I'm done and I start wipe down comes another avalanche. Then I
>just wipe and wipe and wipe but my ass is still dirty. I've gone
>through about 20 Charmin *double* rolls in three days. And the farts,
>they can be heard like ten houses down. I'm farting nonstop when I'm
>not shitting, and I'm shitting when I'm not farting. The wife and the
>dog won't come near me. Yesterday night we were watching tv and I let
>out this deafening ship's horn type fart that rattled the walls and
>shook the furniture. It felt like the titanic was about to come out
>my ass so I ran to the toilet and sure enough, I gave birth to the
>most humongous turd I've ever seen in my life. That thing must have
>been at least 19" long. I felt like I'd just delivered septuplets
>through my ass! Next time I fly I think I'll order the kosher meal.