STATE COLLEGE, Pa. (Rueters) -- Ed Conrad,
the greatest discoverer the world has ever known,
suddenly died today after choking on a slice of
"Whether he choked or was poisoned, we
don't know yet," a detective told Sean "Ins" Hannity
of Fox News. "All we know is that Ed Conrad is now
An investigation is currently underway as well
as preparations to construct a huge bronze statue
for Ed on the spot where Joe Paterno's once stood.
Conrad was on the Penn State University campus
investigating whether Jerry Sandusky was railroaded
since, after all, he was declared impotent back in 1978.
Ed, who was born a Catholic and had served
as an altar boy, will be buried next Tuesday outside
the gates of St. Mary's R.C. Cemetery in Mahanoy City,
THIS CRUMPLED NOTE WAS FOUND IN ED CONRAD'S POCKET
911 ALL OVER AGAIN
NOW WE KNOW WHO KILLED JFk?
MAN AS OLD AS COAL
MOONED OVER MIAMI
DID JESUS HAVE A WIFE AND KIDS?
DEATH DOES NOT EXIST
TIME TO END THE CANCER CURE CONSPIRACY
WHO SAID DOGS CAN'T TALK?