Thread: Ping: Julie
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W. Baker W. Baker is offline
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Default Julie

Evelyn > wrote:
: On Tue, 3 Jan 2012 02:37:24 +0000 (UTC), "W. Baker" >
: wrote:

: >: >
: >: > : I saw a post by Wendy. She failed to put the link on ASD but she
: >: > put a link
: >: > : up on MHD. The link said that fewer people have gastroparesis than
: >: > : originally thought. I know I have it. It has been confirmed twice
: >: > by a
: >: > : gastroenterologist.
: >: >
: >: > : I also saw Ozgirl reply about a person she knew that not only had
: >: > that but
: >: > : bowel cancer. And that woman was on a liquid diet.
: >: >
: >: > : What does this have to do with me? I just don't get it.
: >: >
: >: > : Apparently I am missing something.
: >: >
: >: > : You are clearly angry with me but I don't know why.
: >: >
: >: > I had sent the post about the article to BOTH MHD AND ASD, BUT FOR
: >: > SOME
: >: > REASON, NOT MY FAULT it never arrived on asd. It was not my
: >: > failure!!!!
: >: >
: >: > The implication that somehow iwas wrong or not good enough to not have
: >: > put
: >: > it on asd is not vice. Why say I dfailed, rather than something like
: >: > it
: >: > was just on mhd or no evaluation comment at all?
: >: >
: >: > Wendy
: >
: >: Wendy, the word *failed* doesn't have to have negative connotations. If
: >: I send an email and get a message back that the message has failed that
: >: doesn't mean I wasn't good enough or wrong etc, just that the sending
: >: didn't succeed in its purpose. In this instance I don't think Julie
: >: meant you any ill will by using the (correct) word.
: >
: >It seemed quite judgemental to me. I sent the article to a group I didn't
: >even think julie read because I didn't tink she woudl find anyting from
: >it, then later thried to get it to ASD, but it idn't work.
: >
: >I think julie shuld watch her words, as they can send the wrong meaning if
: >she did not man to criticise. She is often very free with her disgust at
: >things other people enjoy, usually foods, but is quick to take offense if
: >she thinks someone is somehow criticising or being at all "judgemental"
: >about her. I usually remain silent, but this one just pushed the wrong
: >button.
: >
: >Wendy


: Hi Wendy,

: I usually avoid this type of discussion, but I will weigh in on this
: one matter; I have taken issue with Julie in the past about her
: constant expressions of disgust when any food is mentioned that she
: personally doesn't like, and she doesn't like a great many foods.

: Since this is a food group, it gets a little depressing to hear
: someone using the word "disgusting" about all sorts of very healthy,
: fresh and delicious foods. I pointed that out to Julie once, and she
: did make an effort to stop saying this or that or the other thing was
: "disgusting" to her. I appreciated her effort and left it at that,
: (though I have noted that she continues to use the term about foods I
: happen to eat and enjoy). Sometimes we human beings try to change our
: bad habits and it just doesn't work for us..... Oh well.....

: As for the term "failed," I saw those postings, and I don't think she
: meant it as an insult. I myself might say that "I failed to include
: the link," or that the link "failed to come through" in a post. It
: merely would indicate that our intentions didn't work out the way we
: planned. But if Wendy took it in a bad way, perhaps it isn't the
: individual word that is at fault, but maybe that, in combination with
: an accumulation of the many "disgusts" that Julie expresses.


this is possibly true. I often find julies posts off-putting, but just
don't reply. something just hit me this time adn I kind of exploded.

Could be this whole New Year's time which has had me kidn of weird without
Syd, but I have no right to impose that on other people. I am a grown-up
and shouldn't dump and rant on a newsgroup.

: I attribute her many
"disgusts" to be a combination of the fact that
: she has often explained that her mother didn't do a lot of varied or
: involved cooking. I had a great advantage in that mine did, and that
: my grandmother and aunts made a huge variety of excellent dishes, so I
: got to try many things while I was still young enough to keep an open
: mind about foods and developing my palate. So I was advantaged in
: that way.
:
My life and table have been enriched by my continuing open
: mindedness about trying new foods. Julies has not.

: What is more, her illness continues to worsen and it seems obvious
: that her lifestyle and eating habits (like all of us) are contributing
: factors. I feel deeply sorry for her difficulties, but I know better
: than to make any suggestions to her, as I did that in the past and
: remembering how she reacted. I have my own issues in that
: department, so I have no room to talk.

: For the present time, my own health has improved enormously since my
: surgery last summer. I just have a very tiny appetite nowadays, but
: I eat a little of everything, as long as I eat the protein portion
: first on my plate, then the veggies, and only then if I have room, a
: bite or two of starch.

: I hope I haven't "failed" in my attempt to be fair in this issue. I
: wish everyone a very happy New Year!

: Evelyn

Glad to ear you are doing so well. Keep it up and keep letting us know of
your progress as we all care about you.

By the way, how is your shoulder doing these days? Mine is canky, I
believe, becuse of the walker putting sress on it.

Wendy