On Mon, 12 Sep 2011 06:56:51 -0700, "Julie Bove"
> wrote:

>
>"Evelyn" > wrote in message
.. .
>> On Sun, 11 Sep 2011 21:27:27 -0700, "Julie Bove"
>> > wrote:
>>
>>>
>>>"Robert Miles" > wrote in message
ews.com...
>>>> On 9/5/2011 11:30 PM, Julie Bove wrote:
>>>>> > wrote in message
>>>>> ...
>>>>>> Given the relationship between Julie and her parents I would be
>>>>>> inclined
>>>>>> to start as I mean to go on. As you say, letting them know up front
>>>>>> what
>>>>>> you are willing/capable of doing. Not everyone has the ability to look
>>>>>> after aging parents. Just before my mum went into a home I had two
>>>>>> young
>>>>>> babies. It was very stressful despite the fact that we had always got
>>>>>> on
>>>>>> well.
>>>>>
>>>>> Angela and I have both suggested two facilities that we found for
>>>>> seniors
>>>>> but they were totally unwilling to even consider it. My mom however
>>>>> has
>>>>> mentioned that she might have to put my dad in a home. But she is very
>>>>> much
>>>>> in denial about herself.
>>>>
>>>> Have you asked her to consider staying in the home for as long as your
>>>> father is there? That should at least allow her to get used to it
>>>> before she needs to make a final decision about whether to stay there.
>>>
>>>No. Why would I mention that? She knows she *might* be able to do that.
>>>Or might not. Most likely not. Depends on if their insurance would pay.
>>>We just went through this with my SIL's dad. He should really be in a
>>>home.
>>>But he is refusing. When his wife was in there they tried to talk him
>>>into
>>>going to help care for her. He is totally senile but he does seem to
>>>think
>>>that he is helping her. There was no way. Their insurance wouldn't pay
>>>for
>>>it and they don't have the money to do it.
>>
>>
>> Dear Julie,
>>
>> I cared for my mother in law almost till she died, and she had
>> alzheimers disease. They never want to leave their familiar
>> surroundings. It is very difficult. I hope you find workable
>> solutions.
>
>Thankfully I'm not involved in that one. But he does want to leave and that
>is a problem. He will get in his car and drive somewhere. And then they
>have to go find him.


On the newsgroup alt.support.alzheimers we encountered a lot of that.
The only way was to disable the car somehow. Yes, it is extremely
difficult. Thankfully, my 98 year old father quit driving on his
own. I have no idea how we would have dealt with that.

Evelyn