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Bar joke - Bears



 
 
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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 29-03-2006, 05:32 AM posted to rec.food.cooking
Dee Randall
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Posts: 2,246
Default Bar joke - Bears

Which is almost as bad as the bear joke:

Bear walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer. The bartender
tells him, "I don't serve bears."

The bear points to the barstool floozie at the end of the bar and
says, "If you don't serve me a beer, I'm going to eat that woman."
Bartender shrugs and goes back to polishing a glass.

The bear [graphic violence of bear eating barstool floozy omitted] and
comes back to the bartender, mouth dripping with blood, and says, "You
gonna serve me that beer now?" The bartender says, "Nope. I don't
serve drug addicts."

The bear says, "What are you talking about? I'm not a drug addict!"

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."



  #2 (permalink)  
Old 29-03-2006, 06:29 AM posted to rec.food.cooking
Dee Randall
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Posts: 2,246
Default Bar joke - Bears

The bear says, "What are you talking about? I'm not a drug addict!"

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."


Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it sunk
in. Cute! :-)

--
Wayne Boatwright @¿@¬


It happened to me, too; on the strings joke -- I had to read it to DH, then
I got it immediately because my brain went into third gear recognizing there
was some competition at hand - tee hee.
Dee Dee


  #3 (permalink)  
Old 29-03-2006, 06:56 AM posted to rec.food.cooking
Wayne Boatwright[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 5,034
Default Bar joke - Bears

On Tue 28 Mar 2006 08:32:27p, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it Dee
Randall?

Which is almost as bad as the bear joke:

Bear walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer. The bartender
tells him, "I don't serve bears."

The bear points to the barstool floozie at the end of the bar and
says, "If you don't serve me a beer, I'm going to eat that woman."
Bartender shrugs and goes back to polishing a glass.

The bear [graphic violence of bear eating barstool floozy omitted] and
comes back to the bartender, mouth dripping with blood, and says, "You
gonna serve me that beer now?" The bartender says, "Nope. I don't
serve drug addicts."

The bear says, "What are you talking about? I'm not a drug addict!"

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."


Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it sunk
in. Cute! :-)

--
Wayne Boatwright @¿@¬
_____________________
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 29-03-2006, 02:30 PM posted to rec.food.cooking
Roberta[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 90
Default Bar joke - Bears

Wayne Boatwright wrote:
On Tue 28 Mar 2006 08:32:27p, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it Dee
Randall?

Which is almost as bad as the bear joke:

Bear walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer. The bartender
tells him, "I don't serve bears."

The bear points to the barstool floozie at the end of the bar and
says, "If you don't serve me a beer, I'm going to eat that woman."
Bartender shrugs and goes back to polishing a glass.

The bear [graphic violence of bear eating barstool floozy omitted] and
comes back to the bartender, mouth dripping with blood, and says, "You
gonna serve me that beer now?" The bartender says, "Nope. I don't
serve drug addicts."

The bear says, "What are you talking about? I'm not a drug addict!"

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."


Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it sunk
in. Cute! :-)


and I didn't get it until I read your post and realized there was really
something there

Roberta (in VA)
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 29-03-2006, 05:56 PM posted to rec.food.cooking
Wayne Boatwright[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 5,034
Default Bar joke - Bears

On Wed 29 Mar 2006 05:30:01a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it Roberta?

Wayne Boatwright wrote:
On Tue 28 Mar 2006 08:32:27p, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it Dee
Randall?

Which is almost as bad as the bear joke:

Bear walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer. The bartender
tells him, "I don't serve bears."

The bear points to the barstool floozie at the end of the bar and
says, "If you don't serve me a beer, I'm going to eat that woman."
Bartender shrugs and goes back to polishing a glass.

The bear [graphic violence of bear eating barstool floozy omitted] and
comes back to the bartender, mouth dripping with blood, and says, "You
gonna serve me that beer now?" The bartender says, "Nope. I don't
serve drug addicts."

The bear says, "What are you talking about? I'm not a drug addict!"

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."


Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it sunk
in. Cute! :-)


and I didn't get it until I read your post and realized there was really
something there

Roberta (in VA)


LOL! Welcome to the club. :-)

--
Wayne Boatwright Õ¿Õ¬
________________________________________

Okay, okay, I take it back! UnScrew you!

  #6 (permalink)  
Old 29-03-2006, 06:39 PM posted to rec.food.cooking
OmManiPadmeOmelet[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3,351
Default Bar joke - Bears

In article 9,
Wayne Boatwright wayneboatwright_at_gmail.com wrote:

On Wed 29 Mar 2006 05:30:01a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it Roberta?

Wayne Boatwright wrote:
On Tue 28 Mar 2006 08:32:27p, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it Dee
Randall?

Which is almost as bad as the bear joke:

Bear walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer. The bartender
tells him, "I don't serve bears."

The bear points to the barstool floozie at the end of the bar and
says, "If you don't serve me a beer, I'm going to eat that woman."
Bartender shrugs and goes back to polishing a glass.

The bear [graphic violence of bear eating barstool floozy omitted] and
comes back to the bartender, mouth dripping with blood, and says, "You
gonna serve me that beer now?" The bartender says, "Nope. I don't
serve drug addicts."

The bear says, "What are you talking about? I'm not a drug addict!"

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."

Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it sunk
in. Cute! :-)


and I didn't get it until I read your post and realized there was really
something there

Roberta (in VA)


LOL! Welcome to the club. :-)


I'm used to puns.....
Both my parents and my brother in law LOVE/D puns!
--
Peace, Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson
  #7 (permalink)  
Old 30-03-2006, 08:23 AM posted to rec.food.cooking
sf[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,923
Default Bar joke - Bears

On 29 Mar 2006 05:56:10 +0100, Wayne Boatwright wrote:

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."


Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it sunk
in. Cute! :-)


Explain it to me... please. I guess I haven't used enough
recreational drugs to know..


--

Practice safe eating. Always use condiments.
  #8 (permalink)  
Old 30-03-2006, 08:49 AM posted to rec.food.cooking
Dan Abel
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 2,528
Default Bar joke - Bears

In article ,
sf wrote:

On 29 Mar 2006 05:56:10 +0100, Wayne Boatwright wrote:

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."


Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it sunk
in. Cute! :-)


Explain it to me... please. I guess I haven't used enough
recreational drugs to know..


I don't know if it is a recreational drug, but a barbiturate (pronounced
bar bitch your ate) is a sedative (central nervous system depressant).

--
Dan Abel

Petaluma, California, USA
  #9 (permalink)  
Old 30-03-2006, 06:09 PM posted to rec.food.cooking
OmManiPadmeOmelet[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3,351
Default Bar joke - Bears

In article ,
sf wrote:

On 29 Mar 2006 05:56:10 +0100, Wayne Boatwright wrote:

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."


Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it sunk
in. Cute! :-)


Explain it to me... please. I guess I haven't used enough
recreational drugs to know..


Barbiturate...

I do drug screens at work on ER patients. ;-)
--
Peace, Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson
  #10 (permalink)  
Old 30-03-2006, 07:21 PM posted to rec.food.cooking
Wayne Boatwright[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 5,034
Default Bar joke - Bears

On Thu 30 Mar 2006 09:09:02a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it
OmManiPadmeOmelet?

In article ,
sf wrote:

On 29 Mar 2006 05:56:10 +0100, Wayne Boatwright wrote:

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."

Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it
sunk in. Cute! :-)


Explain it to me... please. I guess I haven't used enough recreational
drugs to know..


Barbiturate...

I do drug screens at work on ER patients. ;-)


Phlebotomist? Ouch!

--
Wayne Boatwright @¿@¬
_____________________
  #11 (permalink)  
Old 30-03-2006, 09:59 PM posted to rec.food.cooking
notbob
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3,992
Default Bar joke - Bears

On 2006-03-30, Dan Abel wrote:

I don't know if it is a recreational drug, but a barbiturate (pronounced
bar bitch your ate) is a sedative (central nervous system depressant).


Not so much, now, but drug of choice with the outlaw biker crowd back
in the early 70's, before meth. Commonly known as reds or downers,
chronic users quickly acquired a high tolerance which made for violent
behavior.

nb
  #12 (permalink)  
Old 30-03-2006, 10:52 PM posted to rec.food.cooking
OmManiPadmeOmelet[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3,351
Default Bar joke - Bears

In article 9,
Wayne Boatwright wayneboatwright_at_gmail.com wrote:

On Thu 30 Mar 2006 09:09:02a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it
OmManiPadmeOmelet?

In article ,
sf wrote:

On 29 Mar 2006 05:56:10 +0100, Wayne Boatwright wrote:

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."

Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before it
sunk in. Cute! :-)

Explain it to me... please. I guess I haven't used enough recreational
drugs to know..


Barbiturate...

I do drug screens at work on ER patients. ;-)


Phlebotomist? Ouch!


While I can and do collect blood samples, I mainly run them...
I'm a registered MT (ASCP). 4 year BS-MT degree.

And drug screens are routinly run on urine, not blood. G

Cheers dear!
--
Peace, Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson
  #13 (permalink)  
Old 31-03-2006, 12:07 AM posted to rec.food.cooking
Wayne Boatwright[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 5,034
Default Bar joke - Bears

On Thu 30 Mar 2006 01:52:16p, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it
OmManiPadmeOmelet?

In article 9,
Wayne Boatwright wayneboatwright_at_gmail.com wrote:

On Thu 30 Mar 2006 09:09:02a, Thus Spake Zarathustra, or was it
OmManiPadmeOmelet?

In article , sf
wrote:

On 29 Mar 2006 05:56:10 +0100, Wayne Boatwright wrote:

Bartender says, "Well, that was a bar bitch you ate."

Well, I must really be dense. I had to read that 3 times before
it sunk in. Cute! :-)

Explain it to me... please. I guess I haven't used enough
recreational drugs to know..

Barbiturate...

I do drug screens at work on ER patients. ;-)


Phlebotomist? Ouch!


While I can and do collect blood samples, I mainly run them...
I'm a registered MT (ASCP). 4 year BS-MT degree.

And drug screens are routinly run on urine, not blood. G

Cheers dear!


Thanks for the explanation!

--
Wayne Boatwright @¿@¬
_____________________
  #14 (permalink)  
Old 31-03-2006, 11:26 AM posted to rec.food.cooking
sf[_1_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,923
Default Bar joke - Bears

On Wed, 29 Mar 2006 22:49:23 -0800, Dan Abel wrote:

I don't know if it is a recreational drug, but a barbiturate (pronounced
bar bitch your ate) is a sedative (central nervous system depressant).


Thanks.... I really *didn't* understand. To begin with, I slure the
ending to "it", not ate.

sf
who has never hard it called: bar bitch your ate
--

Practice safe eating. Always use condiments.
  #15 (permalink)  
Old 31-03-2006, 02:00 PM posted to rec.food.cooking
Nancy Young[_1_]
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Posts: 1,846
Default Bar joke - Bears


"sf" wrote in message
...
On Wed, 29 Mar 2006 22:49:23 -0800, Dan Abel wrote:

I don't know if it is a recreational drug, but a barbiturate (pronounced
bar bitch your ate) is a sedative (central nervous system depressant).


Thanks.... I really *didn't* understand. To begin with, I slure the
ending to "it", not ate.


You gotta work it out! That's the fun part.

nancy


 




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