The wind continued to build, now it was a steady 25 MPH and weather
reports were for gales and some severe gales in south coast regions (far
from Edinburgh). Fortunately the wind was at our backs as the 1 liter
Vauxhall needed all the help it could get. The car's torque curve and
gearing were all it took to explain why the Scots drive so fast. If you
want any sort of acceleration from an engine that tiny, you have to keep
it around 4000 RPM.

By this time I had used up almost all of the gas that 30 quid could buy
(36 liters) and had driven about 400 miles. So much for avoiding a
driving vacation.

We consulted our maps and decided to visit the information center just
off the highway in Kinross. I had no trouble finding the exit for the
visitors center or even finding the center. This, of course, resulted
from the fact that the center was closed. The ones that are open are
much harder to find.

We cracked open our Frommer's Guide to Scotland and saw a highly
recommended B&B in Leven. Of course we couldn't find Leven on out maps.
We started off towards the village center in search of a telephone. On
the way we saw signs for the Kinross Castle (every town, no matter how
small, seems to have a castle) and Loch Leven.

We parked the car and took a walk through the streets looking for a
phone booth. No luck. We did see an inn, a bar and a couple of
take-aways. We went into the bar and asked for a telephone. It turned
out that there were two telephone booths concealed behind the bar. I can
only assume that they were there for the locals to use because no
tourist would ever have found them.

I rang up the B&B and a very nice woman answered the telephone. Yes, she
did have an available double, en suite. Everything was going quite well,
until I asked for directions (we were still in Scotland, after all). She
could tell me where she was on the A-915 (A three digit designator!) in
Leven. I was close to Loch Leven. She said that Leven didn't have a Loch.

I told her where we were. She had heard of Kinross. She could not give
us directions from Kinross to Leven. We still couldn't find Leven on our
maps. As our time on the phone expired, I told the landlady that we
would call her back if we could get directions to Leven.

Once back in the car we decided to drive towards the castle and take our
chances on finding a B&B via signage. I then missed the turn towards the
Castle and had to look for a place to turn around. I found a side street
that was too narrow to turn around in, but there was a parking sign
posted on it. On the off chance that there really was parking (thus a
lot and a place to turn around) I followed the sign. My wife was talking
about finding a B&B as I turned into the car park. I look up and said
"What about that one"?

Right in front of us was a Scottish board approved 4 star B&B on a
pedestrian only street. We knew that it was going to be a quiet night
there as it was a pedestrian street off a side street in a small
village. As it happened, we were right.

I knocked on the door and introduced myself to the landlady. Yes, she
did have a double en suite available. Yes, she could provide a hair
dryer. My wife's two primary requirements of a B&B, a private bath and a
hair dryer. Heat comes in third.

These accommodations were quite nice. If the wind and rain had abated,
we could have made use of the private patio space. They didn't so we
couldn't.

Once we settled in, I asked the landlady for a recommendation for a
reliable, inexpensive restaurant. Of course she had a recommendation.
The restaurant in the Green Hotel. It was only "a short walk" back to
the rotary and "a little bit further" on the left.

It had stopped raining, so we decided to walk. Since we had been through
the rotary (many times) already, we had no concerns about walking that
far. We made a quick side trip to an Bank of Scotland ATM for some cash
and continued following her directions. About 10 minutes later we
stopped a man who was a poster boy for stereotypical English dentistry
to confirm our direction. Yes. The Green Hotel was just a bit further
along our path.

Soon we saw a hotel on the left. It was green. That was close enough.

It had both a restaurant and a bar. We elected to eat in the bar. A pint
of Strongbow seemed like the right thing to do, so I did. I had the
braised lamb shank and Brenda had the steak pie. We had a South African
Cabernet Sauvignon and were quite mellow by the end of the meal. Brenda
had a sticky toffee pudding and I had a single malt.

The one negative was that the bar didn't have a non-smoking section.
Brenda and I have had the luxury of living in an area with mandated non
smoking sections for a decade or more. Recently a public area smoking
ban has come into effect (as it has for all of the Republic of Ireland).
When you are used to having a non-smoking section, you become quite
sensitive to cigarette smoke. Unfortunately, we were to find that
non-smoking sections in Scottish establishments (at least the ones we
found) were rare. Still, that's part of travel.

Back we went to the B&B. After a very pleasant night we decided to use
Kinross as our base and booked the next two nights.

Over breakfast, the landlady held forth on what we should see in
EdinBurgh. The Castle, The Royal Mile, The park, Jenner's department
store (which really does have an elevator that stops at the top of a set
of stairs very much like "Are You Being Served"?) and Princes Street in
general. There was only this one small catch. The bridge over the Firth
of Forth (who says the Scots are humorless) was under repair on the
weekends and traffic would be backed up.

She also suggested that we stop in the local cashmere mill store and
check out the wares as they were having a 50% off sale. On our way out
of town we found the cashmere mill store. It was closed Sundays. The
sign stated hours Monday through Friday.

Off to Edinburgh it was. Yes, the bridge was backed up. A lot. Once over
the bridge we entered the northern edge of the city. It's a much smaller
city than Glasgow. The outer sections have the look of a comfortable,
but somewhat shabby, old sweater. As you drive towards the center, the
effect is like traveling back in time (except for some of the newer
buildings).

In need of a place to park, I started following the parking signs. I
really should have known better by now, but there you are. Fifteen
minutes later I turned into a parking garage opposite the castle. If I
could have found a place on the street I could have parked for free
since it was Sunday. We walked out of the bottom of the parking garage
onto a street that was lined, both sides, with empty parking spaces.

Across the street was the castle:

http://www.geo.ed.ac.uk/home/tour/castle.html

Yes, it is a must see, but first ...

The approach to the castle takes you to the Royal Mile, the route from
the castle to Hollyrood. My wife's shopping gene had kicked in big time,
so we delayed our trip into the castle.

One of the complexes at the top of the Royal Mile had a tartan looming
company that makes kilts to order. It takes 7 meters of material to make
a kilt. At 30-40 quid per meter, they are damned expensive skirts.

The snack bar offered free haggis with any purchase.

The machine in the men's lavatory offered Scotch whiskey flavored
condoms, two for a pound.

Unfortunately, my wife's shopping gene had kicked in, but her buying
gene had not. We left the complex with a couple of postcards.

On to the castle. If you want to know more about it, go visit it. It's
worth the trip.

I found a sign telling pedestrians to wait for the green man (will post
OT picture to a.b.f).

We did make it to Jenner's and managed to buy some charity Christmas
cards. No gifts for the children or grandchild, but we did get something.

I nipped into HMV to buy a couple of DVDs not available in the US.

We found out that cashmere was selling everywhere at 50% off.

A sales clerk started a conversation with me by asking "Is that a Krispy
Kreme t-shirt"? (Yes, I was pretending to be a German tourist, T-shirt
and shorts on a 13 degree day).

It started to rain.

We decided to view the park as it was between us and our car, so we
crossed the street (there are stores on one side and the park on the
other, a beautiful layout). It's a gorgeous park, but it did try its
best to kill me.

As I went through the park gates, I tripped over the threshold (why in
the world was there a threshold?) that stuck up about 2 inches. I fell
forward and was barely able to right myself. If I hadn't I would have
been going headlong down a long flight of stone stairs. It was pretty
scary, since I was dead sober at the time.

The statues, fountains, flowers and buildings in the park are worth a
lot more time than we gave them, but it was raining and the wind was
picking up. We decided it was time for some four wheel touring so we
headed east along the southern coast of the Firth of Forth (I love
saying that!).

Matthew (The landlady was really nice)

PS. Continued on next rock

"Matthew L. Martin" wrote in message
...

The one negative was that the bar didn't have a non-smoking section.
Brenda and I have had the luxury of living in an area with mandated non
smoking sections for a decade or more. Recently a public area smoking
ban has come into effect (as it has for all of the Republic of Ireland).
When you are used to having a non-smoking section, you become quite
sensitive to cigarette smoke. Unfortunately, we were to find that
non-smoking sections in Scottish establishments (at least the ones we
found) were rare. Still, that's part of travel.

Problem for my wife too, Matthew. I don't know what percentage of the
population of Scotland smokes, but it must be one of the highest in Europe.
Every pub and bar is always smoke filled. Some have a smoking and non
smoking area, but it's the equivilent of having a peeing and non peeing area
at your local swimming pool.

The bridge over the Firth of Forth (who says the Scots are humorless) was
under repair on the weekends and traffic would be backed up.

As you crossed the bridge from the North, the toll booths are located on the
Southern side near a town called South Queensferry. I lived 4 miles due west
in a small mining town on the banks of the Forth.

It started to rain.

Why am I not surprised:-)

The statues, fountains, flowers and buildings in the park are worth a
lot more time than we gave them, but it was raining and the wind was
picking up. We decided it was time for some four wheel touring so we
headed east along the southern coast of the Firth of Forth (I love
saying that!).

You headed in the right direction.

Matthew (The landlady was really nice)

PS. Continued on next rock

Looking forward to it.

Graeme

"Matthew L. Martin" wrote in message
...

The one negative was that the bar didn't have a non-smoking section.
Brenda and I have had the luxury of living in an area with mandated non
smoking sections for a decade or more. Recently a public area smoking
ban has come into effect (as it has for all of the Republic of Ireland).
When you are used to having a non-smoking section, you become quite
sensitive to cigarette smoke. Unfortunately, we were to find that
non-smoking sections in Scottish establishments (at least the ones we
found) were rare. Still, that's part of travel.

Problem for my wife too, Matthew. I don't know what percentage of the
population of Scotland smokes, but it must be one of the highest in Europe.
Every pub and bar is always smoke filled. Some have a smoking and non
smoking area, but it's the equivilent of having a peeing and non peeing area
at your local swimming pool.

The bridge over the Firth of Forth (who says the Scots are humorless) was
under repair on the weekends and traffic would be backed up.

As you crossed the bridge from the North, the toll booths are located on the
Southern side near a town called South Queensferry. I lived 4 miles due west
in a small mining town on the banks of the Forth.

It started to rain.

Why am I not surprised:-)

The statues, fountains, flowers and buildings in the park are worth a
lot more time than we gave them, but it was raining and the wind was
picking up. We decided it was time for some four wheel touring so we
headed east along the southern coast of the Firth of Forth (I love
saying that!).

You headed in the right direction.

Matthew (The landlady was really nice)

PS. Continued on next rock

Looking forward to it.

Graeme

"Matthew L. Martin" held forth in
:

SNIP

The snack bar offered free haggis with any purchase.

The machine in the men's lavatory offered Scotch whiskey flavored
condoms, two for a pound.

SNIP
We decided it was time for some four wheel touring so we
headed east along the southern coast of the Firth of Forth (I love
saying that!).

Matthew (The landlady was really nice)

PS. Continued on next rock


I can't believe you passed up free haggis AND whiskey flavored condoms!

I am truly enjoying your travelogue, I think you should make it into a
made for PBS mini-series.
--
Harry in Iowa

Socially inept and proud of it.

Harry in Iowa wrote:
"Matthew L. Martin" held forth in
:

SNIP

The snack bar offered free haggis with any purchase.

The machine in the men's lavatory offered Scotch whiskey flavored
condoms, two for a pound.


SNIP

We decided it was time for some four wheel touring so we
headed east along the southern coast of the Firth of Forth (I love
saying that!).

Matthew (The landlady was really nice)

PS. Continued on next rock



I can't believe you passed up free haggis AND whiskey flavored condoms!

Did I say that I passed them up?

I am truly enjoying your travelogue, I think you should make it into a
made for PBS mini-series.

Hey, maybe Graeme will help me edit a book (ducking).

Matthew (I did pass them up, actually)

--
Thermodynamics and/or Golf for dummies: There is a game
You can't win
You can't break even
You can't get out of the game

Harry in Iowa wrote:
"Matthew L. Martin" held forth in

I can't believe you passed up free haggis AND whiskey flavored
condoms!


He probably couldn't decide which was meant to get rid of the flavor of the
other.


Great writing Martin, I enjoy your approach to travel. Whimsy is underrated.

Dale
--

Harry in Iowa wrote:
"Matthew L. Martin" held forth in

I can't believe you passed up free haggis AND whiskey flavored
condoms!


He probably couldn't decide which was meant to get rid of the flavor of the
other.


Great writing Martin, I enjoy your approach to travel. Whimsy is underrated.

Dale
--

Duwop wrote:
Harry in Iowa wrote:

"Matthew L. Martin" held forth in

I can't believe you passed up free haggis AND whiskey flavored
condoms!



He probably couldn't decide which was meant to get rid of the flavor of the
other.


Great writing Martin, I enjoy your approach to travel. Whimsy is underrated.

Whimsy? Not me! I'm dead serious when I travel. We'll have no frivolity
while on the road! No, sir!

Thanks for the compliment, but I'm just calling 'em like I see 'em.

Matthew

Duwop wrote:
Harry in Iowa wrote:

"Matthew L. Martin" held forth in

I can't believe you passed up free haggis AND whiskey flavored
condoms!



He probably couldn't decide which was meant to get rid of the flavor of the
other.


Great writing Martin, I enjoy your approach to travel. Whimsy is underrated.

Whimsy? Not me! I'm dead serious when I travel. We'll have no frivolity
while on the road! No, sir!

Thanks for the compliment, but I'm just calling 'em like I see 'em.

Matthew