It happened again tonight. We ate the first part of our meal in
relative silence since we don't like to talk much as we eat. As we were
slowing down, we started talking more. Only when we're in the middle of
spirited conversation does the waiter or waitress come over to interupt
to ask if everything is alright. I have to take my attention away from
my dining companions to pay attention to her to reassure her that
everything is fine. (Or it was fine until I was interrupted.)

I was a waitress. I'm trying to be sympathetic to someone who has a
rough job, but it is getting harder. Is it my imagination, or is it
rude to walk straight up to people in the middle of conversation to
interrupt them with some trivial question? Surely if there were
something wrong, wouldn't that be obvious by the fact that I was looking
around for the server trying to catch their eye?

Is there a solution? May I explain that I'm in the middle of a
conversation and don't wish to be interrupted? Would that do any good?
I never take my irritation out on the servers' tip because even I'm
not that cantankerous and because I know the servers would have no way
of making the connection between their interruption and the lower tip.

--Lia




Well I'm sure you were just the perfect waitress at all times. Perhaps you
should start teaching a course on how to wait tables and deal with snooty
customers such as yourself. You could teach new waiters how to read people's
minds so they would know whether a dining party wanted to be left alone during
most of the dinner or if they wanted the wait staff to constantly check to see
if anything else was needed. Perhaps you might try a system where people can
call the waiters on their cell phones. As far as reducing the tip is
concerned, you were totally wrong for doing so. I only reduce the tip if the
waiter is definitely rude or unattentive. I don't consider interrupting a
conversation for two seconds to ask if the dinner is okay to be rude. Was your
conversation really that important? I also don't reduce the tip if there are
problems beyond the waiter's control such as problems in the kitchen.