Can anyone tell me precisely who one
would call in the event of seeing truly outrageous behavior at a
restaurant?

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Yesssss.A few years ago, At Tokyo Delve in North Hollywood a very popular
recording industry hangout. It's one of those" let's yell and scream and get
drunk" Sushi places. My wife and I ,had a Chef serve us a plate of something
( I forget) That had a small cochroach on the plate. When the chef saw it, he
reached over and snatched it off the plate...then expected us to eat it. We
have never been back. Besides we had had it with the Asshole behavior in the
place. I like my Japanese food quiet. BG